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So we’re not gonna talk about how Miz was kidnapped on live TV?

WWE.com

I’m usually pretty laid back when it comes to what happens on my pro wrestling shows... unless someone is pretending to be their own relative or relatives. That aggression will not stand, man. But I digress.

Once you’ve seen a senior citizen give birth to a hand, or watched the killer clown alter ego of a children’s show host teleport around sticking his hand in people’s mouths until they pass out, you kind of get immune to stuff, you know?

But on the Aug. 22 Raw featured something I think we should be a bit more disturbed about. Dexter Lumis succeeded in a pre-meditated, coordinated plan to kidnap The Miz. This happened despite Adam Pearce and a pair of Paul Blarts being aware Lumis was up to something. And it happened in Canada, so I’m pretty sure it was violation of the Geneva Convention. Okay, probably not that, but some kind of international law must have been broken.

Miz is surely not the most popular guy on the roster. We’ve also seen him survive being mauled by zombies, and a lot of people probably just assume his massive testicles will see him through this latest traumatic experience. But as Corey Graves points out, why did no one come to his aid? That includes the thousands in ScotiaBank Arena who cheered as a psychopath dragged him into the bowels of the building.

Meanwhile, Pearce is having fun with it. Probably just hoping we don’t call him out on his latest feat of incompetence...

Hopefully Mike’s eating cereal and watching cartoons like Austin Theory did when Lumis kidnapped him in NXT (as opposed to whatever Dexter did to Roderick Strong that left him a terrified wreck).

But I really think we should be taking this more seriously, y’all? Who knows what could happen to Maryse’s husband between now and next Monday?

Give us your rescue plan, or just your general thoughts on this angle, in the comments below.

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