Randy Orton. You monster.
First he had a match with Kevin Owens, and it was pretty good.
Randy raked KO’s eyes and gave him the ol’ Samir Singh bomb on the announce table and the camera work made it look like Owens’ head hit one of the monitors. Owens and Orton traded chops and uppercuts, and there was a cannonball to the floor! Orton gouged the eyes again in a reverse chinlock and Orton ducked a stunner but put Owens away with that RKO.
So, Orton asked Ric to stick around for a celebration after the match, and then it got real.
Orton said he has every right to be upset with Flair, but he just can’t be angry at him. He can’t find it in his heart, but he’s got every right to be pissed, because he should never have had this match against KO, and he only got into it in the first place because of Ric’s ego. He learned so much from Flair and for the past 20 years he’s had his back and taught him everything he knows. He was there when Orton got into a lot of trouble back in 2003. Flair bailed him out and he respected him and loved him.
But he doesn’t love or respect him anymore, because he’s a liability to him. At SummerSlam he’s got the opportunity to take the WWE Championship for the 14th time, and that’s all he should be concerned with, but instead he was worried about himself.
Flair took the mic and agreed that he is no longer the Ric Flair everyone knew 20 years ago. And yes, he does love the spotlight, because he’s a 71 year old man and he’s having the time of his life. He just wants to be there for Orton and be Charlotte’s dad. Orton hugged him and you could see the look on Flair’s face - he knew what was coming.
Orton low blowed him and cradled him in his arms. He let him down gently and the lights started flickering, and on the second or third flicker, Orton punted Flair in darkness. It was a great way to “punt” a 71 year old man with a pacemaker and should never take a bump again. It was one of the best promos out of Ric Flair in the past 10 years at least.
Drew came out and Orton slid out of the ring. He called Orton what he is - an evil son of a bitch. And the show ended with both men staring bullets into each other. I cannot wait for this match at SummerSlam.
That was uncomfortable
Everyone played their roles perfectly which is a great way to start Dominik Mysterio’s WWE career.
I have missed Samoa Joe promos so so very much, and he ran Seth down and started the show hot, even if it didn’t start the way it should have.
Joe said he should be seeing Seth Freakin’ Rollins, possibly the greatest superstar of his generation, and instead he sees a man who got all caught up in his feelings after the WWE Universe booed him a few times. Seth’s retort was that he had to become who he’s become because he was forced to. He asked when it will be enough? Dom said it’ll never be enough and it’s his new dream to kick his ass at SummerSlam.
The contract was signed, and Dominik Mysterio officially became a WWE superstar.
After Rollins made quick work of Humberto Carrillo, he and Murphy took a good 5 minutes beating the shit out of Dom with kendo sticks. Beating. The shit. Out of him. What a way to earn your spot, huh?
Seth is a confirmed bastard after this segment. Dominik had some good talking and sorry I just saw the photos of the aftermath and OW! Ow. Go look at that if you’re interested. It’s not for the easily queasy folks.
The biggest thing to come out of this is that weapons will be allowed in the SummerSlam match. So Seth should be looking out for the receipt.
RETRIBUTION are petulant children
RETRIBUTION has sucked so far.
Last Friday they attacked some people and chainsawed the ring ropes and chased people out. On Raw tonight, no one mentioned them for the first 25 minutes of the show. It was as if they didn’t exist.
How am I supposed to take this group seriously?
They were shown putting two cinderblocks through one window, when a bunch of windows were right next to it, and threw up their arms cheering and ran away. Then a car was shown flipped over and they were kicking it, cheered themselves on, and ran away, like children.
How am I supposed to take this group seriously?
They didn’t even appear in the building at all. There was no additional security, no groups of people going out to find them, no fanfare. Nothing. All it has been, as I mentioned on Friday, are reminders of what is going on in the world in the eyes of Fox News viewers - window breaking, car destroying, weapon wielding anarchists with no purpose but to do exactly that. It’s stupid and it doesn’t look like it will play out well.
Long term storytelling and letting things play out have never been WWE’s strengths. Rowan’s mystery cage, Superstar Shakeup, Wildcard, 10 PM dark Raw, and NXT call ups are just some examples of the past 2 years of stuff like this.
So with all of that, I ask again, how am I supposed to take this group seriously?
The Rest
Asuka def. Bayley - This right here was a MOTY contender. Asuka should be the sole proprietor of the hip attack. She did a german suplex and a running hip attack, Bayley did an ankle lock and both she and Sasha while the ref wasn’t looking tried wearing that leg down. An indian deathlock transitioned into a kneebar, and later in the match Bayley did a great sunset flip powerbomb that sent Asuka into the turnbuckles. But after it was all said and done, Asuka made Bayley tap out.
Sasha was real mad and got in the ring clutching her Raw women’s title. I really enjoyed this match, very much the match of the night for me. Had a ground and pound feel and felt like a blood feud, thanks to Bayley mocking Kairi Sane towards the end. How does Sasha address this loss? I’m excited to find out!
Angelo Dawkins def. Andrade / Bianca Belair def. Zelina Vega - Dawkins really great overhead suplex and would have pinned Andrade successfully if Zelina didn’t distract the ref, but Bianca ran out and attacked her so Dawkins could get the victory with a nice spinebuster.
Vega should wrestle more, because she’s actually good. She had a nice triangle chokehold and utilized an Andrade move with the double knees. Bianca brought the ferocity and ragdolled Vega around. Kiss of Death wins it for her. I really enjoy these two women together. They have some really good chemistry, even though there were a few hiccups.
After the match, Dawkins said that Montez will be good enough in two weeks for the pay-per-view. So they’re making us think that Zelina did it, but I had a sudden scary thought that they’re doing another Enzo and Cass. Please, no. Sure it wouldn’t make sense since they are tag champions, but Dean and Seth were tag champs when Dean turned sooo…
By the way, Bianca Belair invaded a Twitch stream of Zelina Vega’s over the weekend and it looked amazing, so please seek that out.
Apollo Crews is a bad man / Shelton Benjamin def. Apollo Crews - MVP, Lashley, and Benjamin were out and he asked how he’s supposed to win championships in these unsafe working conditions. Apollo Crews never beat him, the lights beat him. Apollo came out and says MVP is always making excuses for his losses and that he must be hurting to see this title that he paid for on his shoulder instead. MVP said he’s stupid to come out alone, and Apollo answered saying he’s allowed to make stupid decisions because he’s a bad man. Apollo tossed a whole couch at them!
Crews used being tossed into the ropes to his advantage and LAUNCHED himself at Shelton. He did the standing moonsault so effortlessly to a close two count. Lashley tried to grab Crews legs and Shelton took advantage and won the match. Lashley tried to lock the full nelson in but MVP told him to let Crews go, because he needs him healthy for SummerSlam. Crews thanked him by kicking him in the head and getting the hell out of dodge.
Apollo had an extra dose of aggression and I really enjoyed him on this show. They’re giving him more talking time and character work.
Fly Boys and The Viking Raiders def. Akira Tozawa and ninjas - This match happened.
After it happened, ninja R-Truth pinned Tozawa for the 24/7 title. I completely forgot that Tozawa was the champion.
Peyton Royce def. Liv Morgan - And we’re already back to the greatest booking (the worst booking), 50/50’ing! One week after reuniting, Liv Morgan gets beat off of a “distraction” by Ruby Riott. Would like to see a women’s tag team get some wins and a tag team but I guess we have to play this game continuously.
Raw Underground - Dabba-Kato (Babatunde), Riddick Moss, and Arturo Ruas were all featured on Raw Underground. None of them really mattered though because the REAL star of Underground came at the end. Shayna Baszler Shayna got in the ring when Dabba-Kato was in and maaaan did I wish those two went at it, but of course Shayna just went after the women around the rope-less ring and they tried to fight back, but Shayna beat them all. WWE. The f***ing camera cuts. STOOOOP. At least they got rid of the dancers. Progress?
Raw was a mixed bag for me. It had a fantastic match with Bayley and Asuka, and some downright dumb shit like these Retribution videos. Raw Underground was heightened with Shayna’s appearance and she needs to school those boys on how to shoot fight. C’mon, WWE.
I wonder what shocking things Retribution will be doing on Friday, since they skip NXT. Why cause anarchy there?
Grade: B-
What were your thoughts, Cagesiders?