Alexa Bliss swung away on her swing.
She said she can’t wait to show Him what she built and hopes He comes back for Legends night next week to meet his hero, Hulk Hogan. She called Orton down Price is Right style and his music played, and Orton didn’t show. She tried again, and the same happened.
Orton must not want to play anymore. Well actually, he does, but not in the ring!
Firefly Fun House music played and Orton walked into the Fun House. He said he thought he’d take advantage of the Fun House being empty and see what kind of things they had going on there. He kicked Huskus the Pig, threw Mercy the Buzzard into Abby the Witch, and tore Ramblin’ Rabbit’s head off. Bliss challenged him for later, but didn’t specify what for.
In the main event, Alexa walked down to the ring and summoned Orton. He came out and asked where He is. Alexa said it’s not about Him, but about her.
She went out to get a present and opened it in the ring. In the present was a gas can and a box of matches. She placed it in front of Orton and challenged him to burn her. She put a trail of gas from the middle of the ring to Orton and he wouldn’t do it. She got angry and said he doesn’t have the guts even though he said he was demented.
He’s nothing but a little bitch. Goodness gracious.
Orton said he wants to see people in pain but he knows that she wants him to do it.
The lights went out, Fiend style, and then came back on with Orton and a lit match in his hands. The announcers were begging him not to drop it on the gas, and then the camera went to black and the show was over.
Kind of a strange ending there. I absolutely love Alexa’s role in all of this. She’s doing some of her best work right now. I also really liked how the puppets in the Fun House were not lively. They were literally just puppets.
Fiend can totally come back and Mandible Claw Hulk Hogan next week, though.
Drew McIntyre admitted that he should have known better last week, when Sheamus said he wouldn’t touch Keith Lee. He went through their history and then Sheamus came out.
He said technically he stuck to his word and didn’t touch Keith… until after the match! Which okay yeah he wasn’t wrong there… but still! So Keith came out and wasn’t pleased with either man, which I liked. He wasn’t happy with Drew for vouching for Sheamus and said eventually, Sheamus would turn on him too. Drew got the mood lighter, but Sheamus Brogue Kicked Keith again.
Keith Lee went after Sheamus for that, and knocked him over the top rope. Sheamus regained control and went all the way up top and sent Keith over the announce desk. Keith had a wicked forearm strike on Sheamus that looked brutal. Then he did what you could call a spinebuster without Keith really even moving. It was awesome. Sheamus showed his incredible strength with a White Noise.
But in the end, Keith got Sheamus up for the Spirit Bomb and won! I totally didn’t expect that. It’s particularly interesting, because we were told that Vince McMahon sent Keith Lee back to the PC for some fine tuning. Now, he’s going to be facing Drew for the WWE Championship on “Raw Legend’s Night” next week.
This is incredibly stupid
I’m highlighting this moment because I need to rant.
If Morrison cashed in the Money in the Bank briefcase, Miz shouldn’t have wrestled the match at TLC. Wrestling in the match signifies a cash in to me.
How stupid does this company look, that Miz wrestled and lost in the TLC match, and then they just give him the briefcase back because someone else cashed it in. So if he grabbed the title, that means that he would have had to give it back according to this, too. But I’m sure they wouldn’t have ran that angle.
It’s so stupid and lazy. It’s Adam Pearce switching men’s tag team titles between New Day and Street Profits stupid. Now I have to see more of those dumb ass Miz TV segments with the two unfunny dorks. Defeated Miz was much better, as we saw tonight in his match with Gran Metalik.
The Hurt Business defeated The Positively Hard Bros - This was a really fun match. Riddle was isolated from the rest as the Hurt Business worked him over. Lashley hit these vicious elbows on him in the ropes. Woods set Alexander up in the ring and did Brodie Lee’s set up into the discus clothesline, which Tom Phillips said “Yeah yeah yeah, a big Harper clothesline” and that brought tears to my eyes. Jeff Hardy got locked in the Hurt Lock once again and tapped out. This was definitely the match of the night for me.
Gran Metalik defeated Miz - This was actually a fun little match between these two. Metalik really had some urgency trying to put Miz away. Metalik did an awesome spot over the top rope to Miz on the floor which looked awesome. For a little peek behind the curtain, I had originally put Miz defeated Gran Metalik because I just knew that was going to be the ending, and I was pleasantly surprised to see I was wrong! Miz is selling his loss of the Money in the Bank so it makes sense for him to lose here.
Shayna Baszler defeated Dana Brooke - Ow ow ow! Shayna really bent Dana’s arm in ways that left my arm tingling. Shayna dominated for a majority of this bout and then locked in a Kirifuda Clutch on the outside. Dana built up some momentum, but Shayna locked in another Kirifuda Clutch for the win. Mandy went to check on Dana, and then Shayna put her in a Kirifuda Clutch! I really liked this dominant showing for her and I hope that it continues. I was really enjoying her before they put her with Nia.
AJ Styles defeated Elias - This match came about because AJ was on the phone and couldn’t hear over Elias’ guitar playing. Omos stood very tall over Jaxson Ryker and made him feel uncomfortable. That’s a babyface move right there. Elias countered a Phenomenal Forearm and went up to the top, but AJ hit a pele kick. Elias got a near fall on a TKO. Elias won with the Phenomenal Forearm. The best part of the match was when Jaxson cowered to Omos. Another babyface move. The match wasn’t bad though. It’s nice not seeing the 10th iteration of a match in a row.
Charlotte Flair wins via disqualification - Nia was trying to injure Charlotte’s arm again, which was a nice thing to see. Charlotte gave her a flurry of elbows to the face and Nia threw her back into the turnbuckles which looked legitimately painful. Charlotte evaded a leg drop and did a Figure Four, but Shayna locked in a Kirifuda Clutch for a DQ. Match was okay, but Nia doesn’t really do much so it doesn’t make her interesting to watch.
Mustafa Ali defeated Ricochet - Ricochet and Ali are fun to watch. Get your minds out of the gutter, people. (I’m sure someone’s mind went there… right? Not just me?) There was a bunch of interference, surprise surprise! Ali hit Ricochet from the top rope to the floor and Ricochet sold it so well I thought he was legitimately injured. The interference in this match was maddening. ALL of this should have been called a DQ. The referee saw all of it! That’s absolutely insane. By the way, this was one of Ricochet’s best performances on the main roster. So Ali won, and then grabbed a mic to ask what Ricochet’s answer is to joining RETRIBUTION, and Ricochet faked him out and gave him a Recoil. That wasn’t bad, nor was most of the match.
We had a very nice graphic for the late Jon Huber, formerly known in WWE as Luke Harper, and both Tom Phillips and Drew McIntyre said “It’s Monday, you know what that means.” That was a great touch, as well as Alexa saying “yeah, yeah, yeah” in her promo and the discus clothesline spot in the 8 man tag. Wednesday is going to be a tear jerker.
What were your thoughts, Cagesiders?