Some places do power rankings. Here at Cageside, we do a stock report.
In this weekly series, we identify three Superstars (or groups of Superstars) who are on their way up, and three that are moving in the opposite direction. After a busy week that included Batista telling Hunter to kiss his ass, Seth Rollins attacking Brock Lesnar right in the dick, and Demon Balor showing off some tongue, a lot of fortunes were changed.
With that in mind, let’s see whose stock has decreased the most this week:
Stock Down #3: Ali
The last couple of months haven’t gone so well for Ali. First he was Wally Pipped out of his spot at Elimination Chamber by Kofi Kingston, then he lost his first name (Mustafa) because Vince McMahon is a quirky stubborn man, and this week (Apr. 2) on SmackDown he served as a total jobber for Samoa Joe in a quick defeat. Ali is trending down at the worst time of the year.
Stock Down #2: Rey Mysterio
Rey Mysterio had a very rough week. He lost a match against Baron Corbin on Raw where the Lone Wolf didn’t even need to use his End of Days finisher to pick up the win. Even worse, Rey suffered an ankle injury during that match, and so his status for WrestleMania is up in the air.
Stock Down #1: Sanity
Oh dear. I think Sanity is supposed to stand for chaos and mayhem, yet they have been serving as controlled corporate bodyguards for Shane McMahon in recent weeks. They have been presented as the typical loser security who can’t actually offer competent protection. Sanity fought the Miz in a 3-on-1 handicap match and somehow lost the match despite the overwhelming numbers advantage. Wolfe, Dain, and Young aren’t even listed among the current competitors in the Andre the Giant Memorial Battle Royal, so it’s not clear if they’ll even make it onto the WrestleMania card. It seems like these guys were much better off dealing with the obscurity that comes with no television time.
Now let’s see whose stock has increased the most this week:
Stock Up #3: Apollo Crews
Apollo Crews doesn’t usually get much time to shine on Raw, which is why it was a little surprising to see him dominate the field in a preview of the Andre the Giant Battle Royal. Not only did Crews defeat Jinder Mahal in a lumberjack match, but then he cleared all the lumberjacks from the ring and stood tall posing with the Andre trophy.
Stock Up #2: Beth Phoenix
The Glamazon received a big spotlight this week (Apr. 1) on Raw when she used her impressive power moves to annihilate the competition. She speared Tamina through a barricade and finished off Peyton Royce with a Glam Slam. Beth Phoenix has now asserted herself as the dominant powerhouse of the women’s division with WrestleMania 35 right around the corner.
Stock Up #1: Ronda Rousey, Charlotte Flair, Becky Lynch
The story for the main event of WrestleMania has been a convoluted mess, but they at least ended it with a spectacular scene where all three women were arrested yet continued to create pure chaos while they were escorted out of the arena. Rousey and Becky had a kick fight while handcuffed inside a police car that resulted in a broken window, Ronda crashed a police car while driving it handcuffed, and Charlotte practically kneed Ronda’s head off in the aftermath. This segment was nuts, and provided non-stop entertainment from start to finish.
There you have it, Cagesiders. Whose stock do you think has changed the most this week?