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WWE SmackDown (April 16, 2019) – Abridged

In which KO is O.

discount Marvel movie intro, then/now/whatever

well it’s KO show time

KO: imma say french stuff cause hometown


KO: Vince has a big thing later, also I’m great


KO: here’s Kofi

he in fact is

KO: hey Kofi, you won at Mania and you’re great, how bout that

KOFI: yep, fam was there, Universe rocks

KO: hey Xavier, E’s not here, how bout that

XAVIER: E’s hurt, Raw took all my gaming buddies so very nah

KO: hey Kofi, you gonna fight Nakarusev later, E’s not here, I’m O, lemme join, how bout that

XAVIER: well

KO: plz

XAVIER: you gotta have hips

KO: hips don’t lie

KOFI: hey Universe, KO wants to join, how bout that


XAVIER: cool KO’s O now, have a unicorn horn

he in fact is and does

CESARO: hey Nakarusev, wanna join tonite, how bout that


here’s FINN, he’s fightin ALI

FINN: have offense

ALI: have cruiserzooms

FINN: hey me too, pin

ALI: nah

FINN: have ropes then

ALI: imma zoom more, have the floor and imma dive

FINN: k but rest holds and corner chops tho, pin

ALI: still nah

FINN: then slingblade

ALI: superkick, pin

FINN: nah, cornerslam, chest stomp, imma climb

ALI: me too, top rope kneethrow, pin

FINN: nah

ALI: imma jump then

FINN: nah, dropkick, coup de grace, pin

ALI: k

FINN: nice tho

ALI: thx

meanwhile backstage

NEW DAY: hey O, eat all the pancakes

O: very nah

NEW DAY: plz

O: fine

here’s a dino head in a box again, meanwhile backstage

NEW DAY: yay O ate all the pancakes, match time

O: stomach’s very ow tho

MELLA’s fightin CHARLOTTE now

CHARLOTTE: have kicks, Canada sucks btw

MELLA: have offense and the floor

CHARLOTTE: here’s a wall then

MELLA: cool imma climb it


MELLA: get in the ring

CHARLOTTE: woochops then

MELLA: fun, have a corner, imma moonwalk

CHARLOTTE: facekick to the floor


CHARLOTTE: imma heel a bit, figure four

MELLA: tap

suddenly a wild LARS appears

TRUTH: hey maybe leave

LARS: nah

TRUTH: have all the offense

LARS: slam

MELLA: soooooo imma leave

LARS: cool, slammin Truth again

here’s THE MAN

THE MAN: won at Mania, gonna fight all the folks, who’s first

suddenly EMBER

EMBER: well hi

THE MAN: was talkin

EMBER: don’t care, gimme your belt

suddenly BAYLEY

BAYLEY: got shook to SDL, basically made women’s tag belts happen, gimme your belt

suddenly IICONICS

BILLIE: someone said two belts

PEYTON: we got those

BILLIE: took em from Bayley

IICONICS: they’re iiconic

suddenly PAIGE

PAIGE: brought tag friends, imma manage em, here’s –

suddenly SONYAROSE

SONYAROSE: hey IIconics, gimme your belts

PAIGE: nah, here’s Asuka and Kairi, brawl time

unabridgeable chaos ensues, turns into 8 man tag cause SDL playaplayaplaya, that happens til

KAIRI: insane elbow pin


TOM: member how Lars murderdeathkilled all the folks

BEAR: yawn

meanwhile backstage

O: awwwwwww

NEW DAY: speak from the grapefruits


NEW DAY: cool let’s fight folks

6 man tag with NAKARUSEVSARO cause SDL playaplayaplaya

BUDDY: first tho I got shook to SDL

BEAR: so 205 Live’s canceled huh

XAVIER: Rusev gets graps

RUSEV: have machkabeef tho

XAVIER: nah, pin

RUSEV: nah

KOFI: tag, pin

RUSEV: nah

NAK: tag, imma try

KOFI: have a corner

NEW NEW DAY: gonna stampede

O: cannonball


NAK: nah

CESARO: have the floor

RUSEV: and a wall

XAVIER: face in peril time


he does til

XAVIER: missile dropkick

KOFI: tag, zoomytime, SOS pin

CESARO: nah, swiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiing, sharpshooter

KO: superkick

NAK: kick

XAVIER: don’t

RUSEV: tag, have the floor

O: tag, Kofi flies

KOFI: trouble in paradise

O: stunner pin


oh hey creepy toys and they’re laughin and come on just let BRAY fight already


VINCE: got a big thing, it’s Elias

BEAR: um

ELIAS: yep, pretty great, Montreal sucks, don’t know French, imma play things

suddenly ROMAN

ROMAN: time to overcome things

ROMAN overcomes things

VINCE: why tho

ROMAN: kinda my thing, have some

VINCE: very ow

ROMAN: SDL’s my yard cause big dog, bye

ELIAS: see ya

ROMAN: kidding, imma overcome things again

ROMAN overcomes things again

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