Okay, so here’s the thing: This show was boring. Mind-numbingly boring. There was a bad storm rolling through Memphis and I was praying it would knock my power out so I didn’t have to watch more of this show.
So let’s talk about the two good things before I trash the rest of it.
Ambrose provides no answers
WWE slow-rolled the hell out of this show, but here’s the one feud where it actually makes sense.
Seth Rollins walked out to talk first about how angry he is at Baron Corbin. He helped Brock Lesnar become champ again and it’s a direct insult to Roman Reigns and all of us. That’s true enough, though your ability to go on this stupid ride again may vary.
Corbin’s trying to surround himself with big dudes to protect him so he threw the AoP a bone and let them have a free title shot against Rollins. Despite losing a match last week, mind you.
And guess what? They won. What a freaking surprise. Probably the most anticlimactic way the AoP could have become champions.
Afterwards, Dean Ambrose came out with a microphone and sank to his knees before Rollins. “Do you wanna know why I did what I did?” He asked. Ambrose then sneered at him, hit Rollins with a Dirty Deeds, and left without a word.
And THAT was the best thing on the show. He didn’t tell us and he didn’t put Rollins out of his misery. You have to imagine where Rollins’ head is at. He’s got to be guilty for his past actions against his brothers, angry at what’s happening on Raw with Roman gone, fearful for his friend...
Meanwhile, Ambrose knows Rollins. He knows how to hurt him and he’s doing an excellent job of it. They finally asked Renee about the whole situation too, which was nice.
Elias is a Star
Manchester, England looooved them some Elias, man. They started chanting for him and Elias began strumming “Seven Nation Army” along with their chant. I thought that was a really nice touch.
His face turn is still early, so it was nice to see WWE give him an opponent with some weight to their name to beat. Dolph Ziggler got handed a spot on the Raw Survivor Series team and wrestled a nice, long match with Elias.
And it was fun! Elias hasn’t had too many workhorse-type matches lately. I think he’s going to need to continue to improve in that area to make it to the top of the card, but this was an encouraging little look into the future.
Maybe.
All the Bad Stuff
Riott Squad vs. Natalya, Sasha Banks, Bayley yet again – I am so sick of this pairing. I am bored to tears. And while the match was fine and I liked the story of this match in theory, it just came off flat. Ruby Riott broke a pair of sunglasses that Nattie’s father had given her. Sounds awful, right? In reality, it was just a segment.
Apollo Crews def. Jinder Mahal – Hey, babysteps I guess.
Ronda was born breaking arms, molded by it... - Yeeeeah okay Ronda. I could see what she was going for with her promo on Becky Lynch, but it just wasn’t very good. Nia Jax’s promo on Rousey afterwards wasn’t very good, either. None of this is really clicking other than Lynch being awesome.
Nia Jax def. Ember Moon – Remember when this wrinkle was being added to the Evolution PPV on Raw and it seemed like they were going to feud? Nah, let’s just beat Moon over and over while teasing a feud with Tamina that no one wants.
Bobby Lashley def. Finn Balor – Don’t be a Balor fan. It’s literally painful at this point.
Drew McIntyre def. Kurt Angle – The main event was as painful to watch as it is to be a Balor fan. McIntyre beat Angle with an Ankle Lock. Oooooh how evil.
Braun Strowman chased Corbin all night – They tried to capture the fun of Strowman chasing fools. It didn’t work. Some of that is Corbin, to be honest. Who honestly feels that strongly about the guy?
This show gave us virtually nothing to be excited about – but what could you honestly expect after the mess that was Crown Jewel? The “good guys” got beat up all show and now the dumb red belt is back on Lesnar.
You know what really pisses me off? WWE is trying to build up two people right now: Strowman and McIntyre. And like them or not, do you know who’s hindered by not having a freaking belt right now?
Strowman and McIntyre.
Grade: F
What a dumb show. I’ll be here next week because I’m getting paid. And that’s the only reason.