If WWE Superstars were on Game of Thrones, these would be their House Words

As you’re certainly aware, the seventh season premier of HBO’s mega-hit Game of Thrones airs tonight. The show that combines more slit throats and nude scenes than seemingly imaginable has become a global phenomenon, with hype and devotion perhaps unmatched by any other program in modern television history. The show focuses on the relationship dynamics of noble families*—internally, among themselves, and externally, with competing rival Houses—in a fantasy Medieval world, complete with fire-breathing dragons; a giant wall of ice; a horde of undead controlled by humanoid, supernatural Others; bad weddings; and so much more.

(This is somewhat in contrast to the A Song of Ice and Fire novels written by George R.R. Martin, which go to much greater lengths to examine how these conflicts among the nobility affect the average person... And yes, I’m being that “the books are better” guy.)

Quite often, WWE programming—or backstage politics—can seem similarly cutthroat (if not literally in WWE’s case). Superstars with outsized, larger-than-life personas battle their rivals in a heated, lived-in universe, with backstabbing and unlikely alliances aplenty. With that idea in mind—if WWE Superstars were indeed Houses of Westeros, what would be their House Words?

It’d be very easy to simply appropriate tag lines and catchphrases of WWE Superstars for their mottos, but doing such is the easy way out of this exercise. No, this needs to be done proper, taking respective character arcs and traits into account to create truly apropos slogans for our heroes of the squared circle.

Without further ado:

House Ambrose: Pride in Cunning

At times Dean Ambrose can seem to be simply wacky, just a goofball without cause. But oftentimes his strangeness reveals itself as being very deliberate and crafted to aggravate a given nemesis so much that they in turn give Ambrose what he desires. Many opponents have thought he’s a mere “lunatic,” and in the process have been manipulated wholly to benefit Ambrose.

(Note: In ASoIaF parlance, House Ambrose’s words (unofficially) are “Never Resting.” This is actually rather fitting for Dean, who since the breakup of The Shield has been one of if not the greatest workhorses in the company.)

House Banks: Righteous Indignation

The Boss is a revolutionary who prides herself as being a vanguard of a social movement to advance women’s wrestling and is not particularly interested in keeping her thoughts and feelings quiet. You know exactly how Sasha Banks thinks of herself—”the greatest woman’s wrestler this company has ever seen”—and in countless interviews has (rightfully) lampooned WWE’s prior attitude toward its female performers.

Banks is most impressive and memorable when she’s displaying a heated aggression that stirs up the fiery passion inside herself—to the point where it’s simply impossible to keep it inside. She’s a rebel with a cause, and it’s a cause that brings vehemence out of her. An extra bonus of these words is that they hint at the destructive fall from grace that such overt passion can cause.

House Bliss: Our Words Are Sharp

Alexa Bliss is equipped with a razor-sharp tongue that can eviscerate any opponent put before her. Truly, her rhetoric is her most effective gift, and it is quite the gift indeed. The Raw Women’s Champion can cut down any wrestler with her icy words and have rightfully earned her the moniker of WWE’s “wicked witch.”

This motto is a slight bastardization (reference intended) of a Westerosi House of the North: the rather infamous House Bolton. Their words, “Our Blades Are Sharp,” are meant to signify their viciousness in war—and hint at their old tradition of flaying their opponents alive. Thankfully Alexa does not harbor a similar taste for flaying—but the brutal effectiveness of her insults do always seem to have a rather revealing touch. “A naked man has few secrets, but a flayed man has none” is House Bolton’s unofficial motto, and indeed once Alexa is done verbally sparring with someone, it can often feel as if she has revealed the brutal and ugly truth about her opponent.

House Haitch: Going Over

This motto hardly needs explanation.

If anything, the trickier task was figuring out the House name itself: House Levesque? House Levesque-McMahon? House Helmsley? House Paul?

In the end, “Haitch” seems the most appropriate, as it makes clear we’re referencing modern, “father of NXT” Triple H, which encompasses all prior versions.

House Lorcan: The Hard Way

A ferocious brawling style has turned Oney Lorcan into a fan favorite in NXT. In recent weeks he has busted open both Drew McIntyre and Hideo Itami simply through the power of his strikes—without the need to rely on blades or blood capsules to draw blood. With his bruising fists, it seems unlikely that those two will be the last that feel Oney’s wrath.

House Lynch: Strength through Struggle

Becky Lynch’s WWE tale is one of perseverance. Despite the frequent crushing heartbreak of betrayal, she soldiers on. Since her classic match with Sasha Banks at TakeOver: Unstoppable, Becky has tapped into an inner power that turns the misery of her ostensible early forced retirement due to injury into a driving force to be the best wrestler she can be—while striving to remain the good-natured person that is her truest self.

Her babyface determination and resolve provides a vast reservoir of straight fire, and that steadfastness comes from the pain she suffered as a young woman.

House Moon: Chosen by Fate

For 468 days, Asuka has reigned as NXT Women’s Champion. She is taken on all challengers and emerged unscathed, becoming seemingly invincible in the process. Her combination of crushing strikes and vicious submissions has proved far too much for all opponents.

But there is one opponent who seemed to get the better of Asuka, who forced the champion to resort to dirty tricks to retain her championship at TakeOver: Orlando. The enigmatic Ember Moon was in place to hit her Eclipse finisher—a move so devastating it has “injured” at least one other opponent in storyline—before Asuka threw the referee into the ropes, knocking Moon off the turnbuckle and allowing the champion an opening to hit a roundhouse kick for the win.

Furthermore, Moon was deliberately injured by Asuka at the close of a battle royal to determine her number one contender for TakeOver: Chicago, adding more fuel to the belief that Asuka fears Moon. But with Moon finally healthy, all signs point to a rematch at TakeOver: Brooklyn III—and it appears as if Asuka’s long reign will soon be ended by the chosen one.

House Owens: Family Above All

Kevin Owens has made clear throughout his WWE career that he will do anything to provide for his family. He will betray anyone, he will assault anyone, he will beat anyone in order to secure a greater life for his wife and two children. Owens will justify just about anything in his quest to better his loved ones.

If only that was the KO we got to watch weekly on SmackDown Live, rather than Generic Foreign Heel #2. HIs current gimmick is an immense waste of his talent, but we all remember—and long for—the cold sociopath that made such a mark in NXT.

House Reigns: The Fist of Power

Everything about “The Guy” screams cold, hard, power. Love him or hate him, he is an imposing figure, with an undeniable presence and matches that routinely fall under the category of “hard hitting.”

This motto is a perfect match for a man who literally cocks his fist before hitting his signature Superman Punch, and who is one of the few truly willing to go toe-to-toe with Brock Lesnar.

House Royce-Kay: Standing Out

The Iconic Duo of Peyton Royce and Billie Kay simply commands one’s attention, but it wasn’t always this way. Indeed, for a very long time their NXT careers seemed stalled. But in the run up to last year’s NXT Awards, their social media campaign to win “Breakout Star of the Year” resonated with the WWE Universe, propelling them to the trophy and giving their characters some much needed definition.

When creative failed, Royce and Kay simply took it upon themselves to get noticed—to make themselves stand out.

(Note: House Royce’s words in A Song of Ice and Fire are “We Remember.”)

House Strowman: Hear Me Roar!

Admittedly, this is bit of a cheat. You see, a notable Westerosi House already uses “Hear Me Roar!” as their words. To be fair, you probably would recognize said family more by their far more famous unofficial motto: “A Lannister Always Pays His Debts.”

Hear Me Roar! is simply a perfect motto to use for a man who literally roars to open his theme music.

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Comment below with potential House Words for other favorite Superstars, and tune in to HBO tonight just to see how many more of your favorite characters die in horrifying circumstance.