For several weeks now, this piece has been brewing. From the depths of my very soul, I’ve found myself enjoying one segment above almost anything else not involving either AJ Styles or Braun Strowman. Surprisingly, it’s come from a most unlikely source. That’s not a shot at either guy, but more about how these two have been slotted since very early in their main roster runs with WWE.
Today, however, I can finally write the following sentence in a most gleeful fashion:
Breezango is freaking great.
Writers love making comparisons, especially in sports. LeBron James is the new Magic Johnson, Tony Romo is a gunslinger on the level of Brett Favre, and at one point, every young gun might have a shot to be the next Tiger Woods. Being a writer, I’m going to make a comparison many may find absurd, but allow me to explain it after the fact, as there are definite caveats that must be applied at this stage.
Tyler Breeze and Fandango have a chance to be the new Edge and Christian.
Before you start flooding my email or my mentions with hate, continue reading, and perhaps this will make more sense. I’m not saying these two guys are those two guys inside the ring, although Breeze is an excellent in-ring performer, and Fandango is average at worst. What we can all agree upon is they’re never going to stink up a ring, if given a chance to perform. No one will have a world beater in 90 seconds, unless that one’s name happens to be William Goldberg.
Why did Edge and Christian work so well? It wasn’t just the comedy and it wasn’t just the high quality matches, including the plethora of dangerous gimmick matches they endured to become superstars and make a name for themselves in the most competitive of times. It was an achievable, but somewhat rare mixture of credibility and ridiculousness. It was everything mentioned above and more, and here we arrive back at Breezango.
How does WWE make The Fashion Police succeed in the long term? Look back to the rise of The New Day, and the answers emerge. Those three went about it differently, with a short failed babyface run that quickly gave way to a snarky, pop culture infused geek chic heel dynamo. As I’ve written before, virtually no New Day match sticks out as a ring clinic, but those gentlemen sold merchandise by the truckloads in Orlando during WrestleMania week, and they’ve been doing the same across the country.
For The New Day, it wasn’t about the in-ring, though all three are fairly solid workers. For Edge and Christian, the work was increasingly strong, but the charisma and willingness to play idiots for the longer creative reward was what really sold them to the masses. Yes, we remember No Mercy 1999 as the night those two made Matt and Jeff Hardy and vice versa, but when we think of the duo, outside of the craziest of matches, we think of the five second pose, the kazoo, and the corny humor that clicked because it matched the time, and it was done with joy.
The Fashion Police need precisely one thing to take the next step, and that’s in-ring credibility. The New Day won a lot of wrestling matches, and despite not usually being the featured players in the multi-person ladder matches in 1999, 2000, and 2001, Edge and Christian won most of those bouts. What needs to take place on Sunday is a solid, serious performance from Tyler Breeze and Fandango. Luckily, they’re in the ring with a veteran team whose heel turn has been a refreshing turn of events. The Usos are doing some of the best work of their careers, and they’re the complete antithesis of The Fashion Po-Po.
If Breezango walk in and get slaughtered, their station in WWE is then set. They’re midcard guys with no protection and their act is cute, but nothing more. That would be a crying shame, and at a time where tag wrestling has a chance to break out, but certainly hasn’t done so, it would be a major business blunder. Last night on SmackDown Live, JBL said he believed these two would one day be WWE Tag Team Champions. “I don’t know if it’s going to happen on Sunday or not...” was the next line, but that’s completely acceptable.
They don’t have to win.
They just have to look good.
If the teams go out there, get 15 minutes, and tear the house down with a well-structured story, great false finishes, and a hot tag that blows the roof off the place, screwing them over and keeping the heat on Jimmy and Jey isn’t just okay, it’s desirable. You then have a rematch people actually want to see featuring superstars who want nothing more than to stand out and make people notice them. This can be a legitimate feud, not just a one off, with the Usos playing the thugs, embracing the gangsta rap criminal side, and The Fashion Police being Angie Tribeca and Frank Drebin rolled into one.
The Fashion Files is terrific television, and here’s one example of WWE getting something right after nearly blowing it with The New Day. Though their act has gotten stale for me, I love those three guys. The problem is the length of the segments and the level of overexposure once WWE saw money in them. Less is almost always more in professional wrestling, and the reason these Breezango segments are so perfect is because they’re brief, they’re funny, and then they’re gone. We don’t have a chance to get tired of the slapstick nature of it all. It’s basically a YouTube clip with Vince McMahon’s budget.
It’s good because it feels viral. Around so many long-winded promo segments and bad interviews, here’s the WWE equivalent of a live-action Vine video popped right into their television show. As long as that doesn’t change, it’s doubtful many of us are going to tire of that slice of the product.
On Tyler Breeze’s figurative CV, next to the “Trained By” line is the name of Lance Storm. We’ve seen him in NXT main events, we’ve seen him work Jushin Liger, and we know what he’s capable of in the ring. Fandango kept it basic, but he never embarrassed himself, and when given an opportunity, he’s often been better than his material. Both are committed to succeeding, and if you ever watched Swerved on the WWE Network, you know first hand Fandango is arguably that rather poor show’s MVP.
These guys are entertaining and they’re a strong match as a unit. If there’s one thing I’d like to see, it’s getting rid of the dual themes and either settling on one, likely Fandango’s, or coming up with something new to work with both of them. If this is handled correctly, they absolutely can be Edge and Christian for 2017. That’s setting a high bar for them to achieve, but I believe in these two, and I’m thoroughly enjoying this experiment. WWE is giving them a chance, and we’re all reaping the benefits of it.
As someone known for fashion faux-pas and apparel atrocities, I should hate these two, but I don’t. How could anybody dislike them? It’s impossible. WWE should ride this as far as they can take it, and step one is a COMPETITIVE, knock-down drag out war with Jimmy and Jey Uso at Backlash on Sunday night.