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'American Grit' recap: Take it to the bridge

Will Team Noah rebound from their first loss of the season?

All four teams are now down at least one person. We're left with mostly likable people, so let's see who will step up to be awful and fill that void!

The teams return from the circus and Team Nick finds out that Lisa was the one who ended up going home. Team Noah isn't sweating it too bad, since they're ready to rumble.

RORKE DENVER is still displeased about how his team has been performing, so he does a bunch of team exercises with them where they all lift a log together and do push-ups and get their faces in the mud. Smart of RORKE DENVER to tire his team out before the evolution.

At said evolution, John Cena lets us know that this is the halfway point in the competition, so things are only going to get more intense from here. This evolution is called "Bridge It," but I prefer to believe it is called "Bridget." They have to work together to build functional bridges all the way across a 60-yard field without any of their feet touching the ground. If anyone touches the ground, they have to go back to the start of that part of the course.

Team Tee thinks her team has the advantage, because this is so similar to the Crucible. Tee is a huge Arthur Miller fan.

The first part of this course is a steel wire tightrope, with a slack rope for balance that team members have to draw taut. Mario falls off a couple times right away. There's a second cable bridge that people start having even more problems with. Jim, Tony and Mario are all just not getting past it at all. Tony even bails off the cable right into Tee, who takes a hard fall.


Team Noah takes first place and gets in first place, but Team RORKE DENVER isn't far behind. Tony and Nick finally have to slide dick-first across the cable to finish the first obstacle. Team Nick enters the second area in last place.

The second obstacle involves having to lash planks together to get up and over a beam and onto another platform. Team Noah gets over no problem. The third obstacle involves having to use barrels and planks to make a bridge, moving the barrels and planks to keep the bridge going.

Jim has more genitals-based problems and yells about them a lot.


This show is pretty good.

Team Noah is still in first, but Team RORKE DENVER is catching up and Team Tee is close behind. And then Kjoy touches the ground and the whole team has to go back to the beginning of the obstacle. Team Noah gets to the final obstacle first, followed by Team Tee. They have to bridge the planks across to small posts that have pegs sticking out of them.

Team Noah wins, again, but Team Tee was real close.

Back in the cabin, Cam and Haze are snuggling again. Cam said Haze promised she would give him a kiss if Team RORKE DENVER won the last evolution. Somehow, I think he's going to get it anyway.

Team Noah's reward is that they get to do some Olympic lifts with John Cena and WHOA CLARE IS COMPLETELY SHREDDED.


It's Clare and John Cena against the other two guys on Team Noah. RIGGED. Yeah, Cena and Clare win. Noah wants a chance to show off, too. He does overhead snatches with a 60-pound kettlebell and goes until failure. He manages 20 reps, which is ridiculous.


It's time to find out what teams are going to the circus. Team Tee has to send Ivette, since Tony went last week.Team RORKE DENVER sends Goldie to the circus, even though Haze asked to be sent. Team Nick sends Jim, which means CAM AND HAZE ARE SAFE FOR ANOTHER WEEK. YAY CAZE. YAY HAM.

The teams talk about their confidence and John Cena meets with the potentially eliminated people and WHO CARES LET'S JUST GET TO THE CIRCUS.

This week's circus is called "squat til you drop." When they reach the endurance platform, they will squat in a three-foot by five-foot frame and balance a cylinder the side of a child on a plank. The first person to drop the cylinder or leave the frame has to ring out. Oh, this is gonna suuuuuuck.

Ivette and Jim are neck and neck halfway through the course and stay close together til the final net. Goldie has some real problems with the giant ladder. Jim manages to barely make it to the platform first, so he'll have the longest break before starting the endurance portion.

Goldie takes her time and arrives looking fine, while Ivette and Jim are still gassed when she arrives. Perhaps Goldie was the smartest person of them all!

Several minutes in, Ivette's cylinder starts to roll and Jim's cylinder almost rolls all the way off his plank before he somehow manages to save it. Seriously, look how bad this sucks.


Jim's cylinder is rocking and rolling, but Ivette's cylinder just topples off toward her. Well, that sucks. Team Tee is down to just one person now.

tee ivette

Super sad business. I don't know if this means someone else has to switch teams or if it's Tony against the world now. If that's the case, I don't think Team Tee is going to be in this competition much longer. Ivette's comments indicate it's the Tony against the world. This should be interesting.


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