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Brock Lesnar is a Modern Day Roddy Piper

The Beast Incarnate and the Hot Rod share a critical trait.

logo via Hollywood Wallace

"Rowdy" Roddy Piper is aguably the most infamous professional wrestler of all time. His reign of terror in the 80's and 90's includes such highlights as: stealing the show at the first Starrcade, pioneering the modern interview segment with Piper's Pit, a Saturday Morning Cartoon, feature films, and overall worldwide fame and recognition. What it didn't include was routine televised wrestling matches.

Today's wrestling fans demand that main event wrestlers compete nearly every Monday night. It may seem bizarre, but Roddy Piper almost never wrestled on television. If you wanted to see him compete in an official match, you had to buy a ticket or wait for the rare special events on closed circuit, Pay Per View, or perhaps on the fledgling MTV cable station.

When confronted with this fact by journeyman wrestler Rick McGraw on the aforementioned Piper's Pit interview show, an incensed Piper challenged McGraw to a rare televised match. During said match, Piper beat McGraw within an inch of his life, perhaps closer, as McGraw died days later. Was this match a fatal encounter or was this nothing but a tragic coincidence? It's difficult to say, but the fact is that Piper wrestled on TV and his opponent was dead within days.

Piper only competed when he stood to gain something, be it the World's Championship (Hulk Hogan), the respect of his peers (Bret Hart), or valuable Hollywood movie industry connections (Golddust). Piper fought when it suited him.

That brings me to the return of Brock Lesnar this week on RAW. Brock, like Piper, is judicious in selecting when and where to compete in official WWE matches. In this case the tantalizing prospect of regaining his championship, brutalizing Seth Rollins, and earning a large sum of money has proven too tempting to resist. This match won't take place on television. Instead, it's exclusive to the upcoming Battleground WWE Network special. This is what's best for business, of course, but it's also for the protection of the vulnerable home television viewer. Let's not forget that the closest thing to a televised match that Lesnar's had in a decade was the brawl where Triple H pooped his pants.

Just like no one needed to see the gruesome scene where Piper delivered a lethal beatdown to Rick McGraw, we certainly don't need to bear witness to each of Brock's foes voiding their bowels on national television. Let's save that for WWE Network!

***

OFFICIAL WRESTLER WRANKINGS FORMULA

ANY WIN = 2 POINTS

US OR INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE BOUT = 1 POINT

WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE BOUT = 3 POINTS

NON "BIG 4" PPV BONUS = 1.5X

SUMMERSLAM, SURVIVOR SERIES, ROYAL RUMBLE = 2X BONUS

WRESTLEMANIA = 3X BONUS

The WWE season begins on the day after WrestleMania 31 and culminates with WrestleMania 32. The wrestler who accumulates the most points over the course of the season, wins the coveted Wrankings Championship!

***

Money in the Bank-- 6/14/15 (1.5x bonus included)

  • Seth Rollins - 7.5 points (WWEWHC bout, win)
  • Dean Ambrose - 4.5 points (WWEWHC bout, no win)
  • Big Show - 4.5 points (IC title bout, win)
  • Ryback - 1.5 points (IC title bout, no win)
  • Sheamus - 3 points (win)
  • John Cena - 3 points (win)
  • Monday Night Raw-- 6/15/15

  • Dean Ambrose - 2 points (win)
  • Kevin Owens - 2 points (win)
  • R-Truth - 2 points (win)
  • Miz - 2 points (win)
  • Kane - 2 points (win)
  • Main Event-- 6/16/15

  • Ryback - 2 points (win)
  • Bad News Barrett - 2 points (win)
  • Smackdown-- 6/18/15

  • Dolph Ziggler - 2 points (win)
  • Neville - 2 points (win)
  • Kevin Owens - 2 points (win)
  • -----------------------------------

    WRESTLER WRANKINGS, WEEK 12 *TOP TEN*

    1. Seth Rollins -- 39 points

    2. Neville -- 34

    3. Dean Ambrose -- 32.5

    4. John Cena -- 31

    5. Ryback -- 29

    6. Roman Reigns -- 23.5

    7. Randy Orton -- 23

    8. Dolph Ziggler -- 21.5

    9. Bad News Barrett -- 20

    10. Sheamus -- 19.5

    Thanks for reading, Cagesiders. We'll see you back here next week!

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