WWE SmackDown comes waltzing back into our lives tonight (Jan. 29, 2015) from Hartford, Connecticut with a special live show on the SyFy channel featuring all the fallout from the Royal Rumble pay-per-view (PPV) that went down this past Sunday night in Philadelphia.
Advertised for tonight: Daniel Bryan vs. Kane in a Casket match, and more!
You can use this space to discuss all the events as they occur, however, and it's probably going to enhance your viewing experience. In fact, I know it is because we're a lot of fun around here.
Enjoy the show!
BaconStrips here. Let's do it live!
WWE Signature, SmackDown intro and pyro, and we are rolling.
Eden introduces Triple H, who comes to the ring alone.
"Welcome to MONDAY NIGHT RAW!!!"- Triple H
Trips talks about the blizzard forcing Raw to be cancelled, and how WWE hates being told what to do.
Trips also touts the WWE Network hitting the one million subscriber mark, and thanks those subscribers.
After rewelcoming everyone to SmackDown, Trips brings up the Royal Rumble (the mere mention brings a bunch of boos). After making a few Deflategate jokes involving balls, he says that he takes action when there is controversy. Therefore, at Fastlane, Triple H is going to stare his problem (Sting) down and solve his problem.
Trips gives high praise toward the triple threat match from Royal Rumble (seriously, if you haven't seen it, go watch it).
Now we get to the REAL problem: the Royal Rumble match. We get a video recap of the end of that match (including The Rock's wonderful reaction to the boos).
The controversy ends on Raw when Triple H promises an announcement that will "shake the WWE Universe to its core."
At this moment, Roman Reigns comes out to a pretty negative reaction.
Roman says that he doesn't see any controversy. He won the Royal Rumble, and he's going to WrestleMania.
"Let's see if you win this one" - Triple H. After this, Big Show comes out for his match with Reigns.
Big Show vs Roman Reigns
This was a slow, plodding affair that was very hard to care about. The crowd booed both men throughout, especially Roman, who did do a good job selling a leg injury. Reigns won with a spear after a few Superman Punches.
Roman Reigns def Big Show
Vince McMahon announces that the WWE Network will be free to new subscribers for February.
Announcement of Arnold Schwarzenegger's induction to the WWE Hall of Fame
Seth Rollins comes out to a big pop.
Rollins tells us that he proved how good he REALLY is on Sunday. He was one second away from pinning John Cena, and he also broke Lesnar's ribs, a fact he is very proud of.
Although he did not win the title, he still has The Future in his possession.
He issues an open challenge to anyone in the back. Who answers? Ryback.
Ryback stares down Rollins until J&J start attacking him. Erick Rowan comes to Ryback's aid. He fights off J&J, but eats a dropkick from Rollins.
Guess who comes out next....Dolph Ziggler. Ziggler evens the odds, allowing Ryback to try a Shell Shock on Rollins, but J&J pulls Rollins off and whisks him away.
Kane pets the casket while cutting a promo. He says that there is no future for Daniel Bryan. Kane will beat him to holy hell, lock him in the casket, and win. The rest of the promo is about Daniel Bryan's life fading away once he's locked in the casket.
:Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. May God have mercy on your soul, because the Devil's Favorite Demon will NOT"
Jey Uso vs Tyson Kidd
A quick little match that ends when Tyson hits the Fisherman's Neckbreaker on Jey. Tyson worked the leg throughout the match. Cesaro tried to get involved, but ate a flying clothesline from Jimmy.
Tyson Kidd def Jey Uso
Rusev and Lana are in the ring.
Rusev is angrily pacing while speaking Russian.
"I SHOULD HAVE BEEN DECLARED WINNER!!!"
Lana angrily speaks more Russian until Rusev retakes the mic. He says that he should be the one facing Brock Lesnar at WrestleMania before putting himself over.
He says that the USA gave him an opponent that has no titles and is from the past: John Cena. Rusev says that Cena has no hunger, no desire, and is half the superstar that Rusev.
Simply put, Cena is a loser.
This causes Cena to come out to the ring. Cena tells Rusev to shut his mouth, or he'll shut it for him.
Cena says that Rusev needs a lesson in respect. He also addresses Rusev's crushing of all of his opponents. He also reintroduces himself to Rusev, calling himself "the face that runs the place"
Cena makes a pubes and boobs joke, and I'm done caring about this segment.
Cena challenges Rusev to a fight, but Lana tells Rusev not to waste his time.
Cena makes another god-awful joke, and Cena says that he will beat Rusev at Fastlane.
Paige vs Nikki Bella is announced for Fastlane.
Renee Young interviews Paige. Renee congratulates Paige on her title shot. Immediately, The Bellas come in and start insulting Paige about her skin tone. Paige plays along until she attacks Brie and goes for Nikki, who hits her with an elbow. Brie holds Paige as Nikki hits her with the forearm.
B A Star, Bellas.
The Dust Bros vs The Ascension
Boring tag match that ends with The Ascension hitting the Fall of Man on Stardust after some miscommunication between The Dust Bros.
The Ascension def The Dust Bros
Hey, there's a magician in the back doing tricks. Miz and Mizdow come in to try and spoil the fun. The magician shakes Mizdow's hand, causing Miz to become jealous. The magician shows Miz a trick involving an egg, ultimately leading to the egg being smashed on Miz's head.
Bray Wyatt cuts a promo. He says that he is legion, and asks what makes us smile. He promises that it will be impossible to smile again. I honestly have no clue what the point of that was.
Kane vs Daniel Bryan (Casket match)
After a long and mainly boring match involving a large amount of Kane dominance, Bryan gets the win after hitting the running knee on Kane. This sends him into the casket, allowing Bryan to shut the casket for the win. To their credit, both men came up with some clever spots involving the casket, so I do give credit.
Daniel Bryan def Kane