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Coulda Been Betta: Vat of Something Awful

Vickie's swan song was a return to the "pool of goop" that should have died when Marc Summers stopped asking kids if they wanted to take the physical challenge.

I saw our guy Geno taking a little last night because he didn't care for the Vickie Guerrero angle. Let me quickly say that failing to be entertained by an angle is not at all the same as being "worked" by said angle. There's a such thing as real heat emanating from crappy (pun intended) low-brow television. Last night was an example, as was last week with the setup for the firing.

As a whole, RAW was a mixed bag. Some of it was entertaining, the highlight easily being the stellar Ziggler/Barrett match, but in the end, it was two decent to good matches and one great match. I found it strange, even if the outcomes were obvious, not to book qualifying matches all night long for the contract bout at the PPV rather than announce the participants.

But to the matter at hand, the "vat of something" angle returned in the form of Vickie Guerrero's write-off angle as she's headed back to school and has had her fill of WWE for the foreseeable future. First thing's first, she was an excellent heel who played her role perfectly for far longer than she had to and always did it well. It's fitting that a McMahon humiliated herself as payment to Vickie for years of loyalty. was a vat of stuff.


It's 2014 and you turned the women with "power" in the company, literally and figuratively, into glorified hot oil wrestlers on your television program. And you wonder why people call wrestling a misogynistic business. Also, Jerry Lawler likes Paige's ass and has no problem telling you about it. Last week, we got cream and cat food.

I was fooled into thinking Stephanie might actually work a short match, but I should have known better. For RAW to be BETTER,  however, that should have happened, even if it lasted one minute. Let me tell you what you do last night.

Humiliate Vickie early in the same way Stephanie did during the promo, then screw her with a quickness in the "match" later on, but have Stephanie in "gear." In the end, you give Guerrero her dignity. The bonus is Stephanie gets to show off the body she is so rightfully proud of, even if it's NOT to work a match. Remember, we saw Cody Rhodes get in the StarDust gimmick and face paint only to talk to Byron Saxton last night.

Even though I absolutely hate it, it isn't like gear means you're working. I've made that point eight trillion times here on Cageside. Plus, this gives the appearance she's working, because she's technically "booked" to compete. I'd also have accepted the "SMH" shirt and the black pants and shoes from 2001. I get that her ruining that dress is supposed to matter, but it really didn't.


All WWE would have to do is let Vickie get Stephanie, drench her in something, AFTER she's fired. It's the same exact effect as last night, with Vickie doing the Eddie shimmy and using the classic music. If you have Stephanie then have security grab Vickie and drag her out while she gets final face time with the audience, you've got a standing ovation for Vickie Guerrero and a memorable moment.

Luckily for WWE, I'll forget about the questionable brown substance in a kiddie pool in a few weeks. If Vickie and Steph could have had an actual confrontation, "you're fired" at the end of it, but then Vickie with a humorous and final moment of triumph before physically being removed from the building, she leaves a hero and fans don't think they just saw a bad local theater improv skit reenacting Stripes.

That "dignity" word I spoke of earlier about Vickie works on a far more important level as well. If WWE avoided the kiddie pool, perhaps RAW could have left with some dignity of its own. Last night, all that was missing was the clown's mouth and a home version of Super Sloppy Double Dare.

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