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It's been more than a full day since John Cena opened the final segment of the Monday Night Raw go home show to the Royal Rumble pay-per-view (PPV) this coming Sunday night (Jan. 27, 2013) in Phoenix, Arizona, and his bizarre promo is still every bit as odd and slightly unsettling as it was when he first delivered it.
He started by talking about fans having a good weekend and the seventh day being of rest, which is funny because he was referring to Sunday and that's not the seventh day of the week. Then he randomly grabbed a kid and started riffing on Call of Duty: Black Ops 2 before making a joke that his username on said video game is "Skidmarks187."
Seriously.
Then he moved on to a female in the audience and kind of sort of sexually harassed her before turning his attention to some other hapless fool who was likely a plant. Hell, they were all probably plants but that doesn't change the fact that oh dear god, now he's talking about bodily fluids and blow up dolls.
Throw in an outdated reference to Brett Favre's dick pics and the worst promo in years was complete. You can watch him go starting at 53:20 in the video below:
Shortly after his big lead-in, he finally said the Royal Rumble is Sunday night and he's going to win it. Then his music played and that was that.
Both PWInsider.com and WrestlingObserver.com have reported that Cena's promo was so bad, he actually had heat backstage. His promo was such a steaming pile of shit that the other wrestlers in the back were left scratching their heads wondering what in the hell this man was doing talking about video games with children in the audience when he was supposed to be selling us on the Royal Rumble match.
Amazing.