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TNA Impact Results, Live Blog (Sept. 8, 2016): Delete or Decay!

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TNA Impact is back tonight (Sept. 8, 2016) from Orlando, Florida and will be airing on Pop TV at 8 EST. This is your spot for the live updates and to talk about it with your fellow fans and viewers.

Tonight, the Broken Hardy and the Hardy clan will battle the Decay in Cameron, NC in the Delete or Decay match. Also, there will be a tag match between Gail Kim & Jade against Allie & Sienna.

We'll be here at 8 EST when Impact will be starting, so come join us!

Results

Cat's foot, iron claw, neurosurgeons scream for more, but me, I'm just here to liveblog a wrestling show, folks.

Señor Benjamin opens the show with a "Don't try this at home" disclaimer and Vanguard 1 tells us no animals were harmed in the filming of this invasion before we get a recap of last week's insanity.

Reby plays piano for an operatic version of Brother Nero's entrance theme as a montage of Señor Benjamin preparing the battlefield for massacre is shown. Broken Matt tells us that his platoon is going to do some training and asks Benjamin to prepare the zoo for visitation and we cut away.

In the Impact Zone with Mike Bennett and Maria Kanellis making their way to the ring as a recap of last week's match against Lashley plays. Bennett on the mic, says that his mom used to tell him not to bite the hand that feeds him, but apparently he's the only one whose mother did a decent job. He should be TNA World Heavyweight Champion, but he's not, and it's all one ungrateful man's fault.

"Moose!" chants go up for a second before he continues, saying that they had a good relationship. Moose did what he said and got paid, but that wasn't good enough for him, no, he had to listen to all the morons in the crowd. He let his ego get the best of him, but just like Bennett brought Moose into the company, he's sent him out, by sending him a very strongly worded text message to fire his ass. Now that Moose is out of the picture he can focus on what's rightfully his, the TNA Championship, and there's nobody that can stop him, not Dixie, not Lashley, and not Moose.

So out comes Dixie Carter, of course. She asks him to wrap it up because the fans are here to watch Impact Wrestling not "As the Miracle Turns." He says that since day one, nobody appreciates him or his wife, and that Maria should be running this company while he's champion. Dixie questions the quality of his decision-making, but she's made a decision that she knows is good for the company, and it involves Bennett. He thinks he knows that she's gonna do the right thing and add him to the title match at Bound For Glory.

He's right, she says, this is about Bound For Glory, but he's not in the main event. She's signed Moose vs. Mike Bennett for the big show. Bennett freaks out as Moose's music plays and he makes his way to the ring. Dixie bails and Moose gets in Bennett's face. Sets him up on the top turnbuckle but Maria threatens him with the Knockouts Championship and gives Bennett room to run. They cower on the ramp as Josh Mathews teases more of Delete or Decay and footage of an EC3/Lashley press conference from earlier today that got out of hand.

Gail Kim comes out for a tag team match and we go to break.

Back from commercial and Bennett's freaking out, because he's not wrestling Moose, not at Bound For Glory, not ever. Dixie says no big deal, she'll just breach his contract and he won't be world champion ever. Dixie's disgusted at how Maria won her title, but she and Billy Corgan were talking with the board of directors, and as long as she's Knockouts Champion, it's a conflict of interest and she can't exercise her decision-making powers over the women's division.

Allie & Sienna vs. Gail Kim & Jade

Sienna starting against Gail, Gail peppers her with forearms and drops her with a series of lariats before Sienna makes the tag. Allie charges in all excited but Gail takes her out. She tries to bail and Gail helps her with a dropkick, at which point Sienna gets in her face and orders her to tag. Sienna back in, Gail with a springboard crossbody, Sienna catches her into a sort of fallaway side slam.

Jade tries to run in but referee Earl Hebner cuts her off as Sienna lays boots into Gail in the corner. Pinkies up corner avalanche gets a nearfall on a cocky pin. Teases the tag but pulls it back and fires a big knee at Gail. Delayed Samoan drop, Jade runs in and breaks up the pin. Gail slips out of a powerbomb attempt and lands a swinging neckbreaker to gain some space.

Allie's super excited for the tag but Sienna won't go for her. Jade in, fires off a series of big kicks culminating in a headscissors takeover and a corner boot where Allie makes the tag. Looking for a double underhook maneuver but Sienna breaks free. Allie comes off the top right into Sienna, so Sienna runs her over and...

Gail Kim & Jade win by pinfall with Jade making the pin on Allie.

Jeremy Borash backstage with Billy Corgan asking him about some rumored big announcement. Billy says they've talked wrestling for years but who knew he could ever have such a big impact on the wrestling world. Borash begs for a scoop but Billy ain't biting. It's up next, and we're back to commercial.

Back from break and we've got another Delete or Decay vignette. Broken Matt had a premonition (ever notice he pronounces that exactly like James Hetfield in Blackened?), and he's brought his whole gang to his zoo to get back in touch with their wild side. His zoo is full of animals with souls, like the giraffe that is also George Washington. He knew George would come, and it's always great to see him. He loves bouncing ideas off him, but he's a hat-biting jokester.

Brother Nero has a delightful sparring match against Smoking Joe Frazier, who is a kangaroo. They lock up and Joe kicks the crap out of Nero's legs.

Then onto the spot monkeys, because Matt is the Spot Monkey Whisperer. One of them is DJ Z, one of them is Andrew Everett, one of them is Mandrews, and two of them are Matt and Nick, the Bucks of Youth!

OH MY GOD THERE'S A TIGER THAT IS ALSO GENGHIS KHAN! Fantastic. Genghis tells him that the enemy is approaching and the battle happens tonight, and we cut to Billy Corgan in the ring.

He says that pro wrestling is evolving, but there's one constant-- the quest for gold, the quest to be the best. So he's got a special announcement, the King of the Mountain Championship is retired and the Impact Grand Championship is born. He hopes that this title will represent an evolution of pro wrestling for years to come.

Drew Galloway comes out, presumably because he heard the word evolution and hey, he works there, too! He says they have a new title, new types of matches, looking for a new champion, an innovator, well, why not him? He's not one choice, he's the only choice. Billy says that Drew should appreciate what this title represents. It's about a new type of match, and we get a video package explaining the rules.

3 rounds of 3 minutes each, scored by a 10-point must system. Pinfall or submission wins the match at any time. An eight-man tournament will be held culminating with the inaugural champion's victory at Bound For Glory.

Drew tells him what's best for business, when you use Drew Galloway to his full potential, he IS this business. Aron Rex out saying that one, he's not this business, the fans are this business. Two, this whole thing started over a title, and now he's gonna send Drew back to Scotland on a medical helicopter.

Billy tells them that they'll settle this later, but Rex will make his debut in a tournament match next week, but Drew will compete in a tournament match right now, and we're off to commercial.

Back from break with a recap of the previous segment.

Braxton Sutter vs. Drew Galloway (Impact Grand Championship Tournament First Round Match)

  • Round one: Drew with big rights but Sutter ducks. In the corner, Sutter turns him around and slaps him in the face. Galloway with a release waistlock takedown and a standing Falcon Arrow before a belly-to-belly out of the corner for a nearfall. Big chop, shoots Sutter off the ropes but eats a kick and some chops before firing back with a big boot. Chokebomb in the corner and chops, Sutter's feeling it. Big stomp to the face but Sutter fires back with slaps and forearms. Double leg takedown and Galloway pounds Sutter on the mat. Straight suplex, more mounted punches in the last seconds of the round. All three judges score round one 10-9 for Galloway.

  • Round two: Just hammering Sutter in the corner out the gate. Northern lariat and Drew stomps his head in. Crucifix buckle bomb and Sutter's swimming on the mat. Drew with a lariat and he gets up on the ropes, looking for a deadlift superplex but Sutter fights out with a hotshot. Up to the top himself, drags Galloway up top for a superplex! Chops from Sutter but Drew caves his ear in with a slap. Double leg takedown and Sutter's pounded away on Drew but Drew's covered up pretty well. Whip and a scoop powerslam get two and Sutter goes back to the mounted punches. Wild strikes on each other now but another takedown and Sutter's laying punches in as the round ends. Round two goes 2:1 to Sutter.
  • Round three: Sutter with a big boot in the corner right off for a nearfall. Laying chops in, whips Galloway but he reverses for a short piledriver! Into the Iron Maiden...

Drew Galloway wins by submission in the third round with the Iron Maiden, advancing to the semi-finals of the tournament.

We're promised the press conference recap next and off to the break we go.

Back from commercial and footage plays of Rockstar Spud attacking Sutter during the commercial and stomping him mouth-first into the bare steel turnbuckle to avenge his newfound need for adult braces.

A vignette of a dude driving down the road past Rosemary now. He asks if she needs a ride and is creepy about it when Abyss and Crazzy Steve are suddenly all over his truck. They leave him in the middle of the road and drive off towards Cameron, North Carolina.

Press conference recap now. Josh Mathews introduces the BFG main event. Billy thanks everybody for being here and introduces the champion and challenger before noting that he's gonna make great changes going forward, but these great main events will stay. It'll be a match for the ages, one you'll look back upon twenty years from now.

Ethan Carter III up first. He thanks Billy for the introduction and says he's staring at the most dominant TNA World Heavyweight Champion of all time. He's trying to look into his eyes but he can't because of his sunglasses. He sees a bully, an intimidator, a coward, and disrespecting a division was a dick move. They've been doing this dance since the UK when they were nose-to-nose over Kurt Angle's broken body, to which Bobby interjects that he did that. EC3 says he beat Kurt Angle too, and he's come to fight at BFG.

Lashley says he doesn't dance, first off. TNA is under fire from different wrestling organizations, different sports, even little MMA guys he says. He's a bully, he says, because wrestling needs to eliminate the weak, and there are a lot of weak dudes in the locker room. He doesn't want to wrestle weak people, he wants to defend this company, against any sport, against any fighter. He asks EC3 if he can defend it.

EC3 says he's right, defending the company is the job of a champion, and that's not him. No, he's the guy you call when you need to kick the ass of the most dominant champion of all time. He's coming for Lashley with every fiber of his being, and he swears to everyone that he's going to become an EC3-time World Heavyweight Champion.

Lashely thinks it's funny that people believe the hype. Carter's a bodybuilder, but he's a fighter. Kurt Angle said the same thing, Drew Galloway said the same thing, Eddie Edwards, DJ Z, James Storm, and the same thing happened to all of them. He's gonna break EC3 down and leave him laying and there's nothing he can do about it. You can keep hyping these people up as much as you want, but he doesn't care, because he's gonna go home and train his ass off so that he'll be bigger, badder, and ready to kill EC3. He's gonna beat his ass like he's never had an ass-whuppin' before, he needs to understand that. Lashley says that he's the man and he's gonna keep showing us that until we believe it.

Staredown photo opportunity and EC3 flips the bird at Lashley so they brawl. EC3 ain't messing around, so right to tossing a chair at the champ. They fight to the top of the empty bleachers until Lashley throws EC3 all the way down from the top to send us to break.

Back from commercial and we have more footage of the press conference brawl. Lashley takes his jacket off and EC3 tosses him through some trash cans. Lashley slams him onto a table and attacks him with a poster of himself before chucking him into a big sliding door. Lashley orders a guy to open the door and there's an ambulance outside. EC3 comes back a little but Lashley throws him into some plywood and the EMTs check on him.

Recap of all the stuff that's been confirmed for Bound For Glory and then we get a Jessie Godderz video package for the Grand Championship where he talks about why he thinks he's gonna win. His opponent, Eli Drake, makes his entrance and we go to break.

Eli Drake vs. Jessie Godderz (Impact Grand Championship Tournament First Round Match)

  • Round one: Collar and elbow lockup, Godderz with a fireman's carry takeover into a top wristlock, Drake reverses but Jessie gets a hammerlock. Turns it into a side headlock, Eli shoots him off, hip toss, back to the side headlock. Drake to his feet, Godderz lands another takeover like he's Ed Lewis over here. Drake out with a headscissors. Shoulder block, dropkick, flying forearm for a nearfall for Godderz before he goes to the front chancery. Spins it around into a pin, Drake to his feet, has the arm, takes him over, Godderz counters with a gator roll. Pinning predicament from Godderz, double leg takedown when Drake escapes and the round is over. Judges are split 2:1 for Jessie Godderz.
  • Round two: Waistlock from Godderz, Drake makes the switch, Godderz switches again, grabs a side headlock, arm wringer, but Drake clobbers him with punches. Choking him on the ropes now, follows up with knees in the corner. Godderz fires back with boots but Eli lands the floatover DDT for two. Godderz catches Drake off the ropes into a sleeper but Eli throws him off and gets a powerslam for two. Eli taunts and eats a springboard forearm from Godderz. Elbows and knees into a fallaway slam and then another double leg but Drake fights him off. Another floatover DDT attempt but Godderz counters, turning him over for the Adonis Lock with seconds left on the clock but Drake fights through. Judges split 2:1 for Jessie again.
  • Round three: Drake with a haymaker, Godderz rolls him up. Sunset flip, Godderz catches a boot but leaps into a modified powerbomb seconds later! Drake with the feet, steps through but loses control and Godderz is looking for the Adonis Lock again and turns him over. Drake gets to the ropes and Godderz follows up with a big release back suplex. Godderz slumps against the ropes, out of options and...

Eli Drake wins by pinfall in the third round with Blunt Force Trauma, advancing to the semi-finals of the tournament.

Up next... Delete or Decay!

But first, we come back from break with an ad for The Fixer! Also a recap of the whole Galloway/Rex situation leading into some comments from Rex outside. He kicks a chair and says he's in the mood to talk. Drew called him out and cheapshotted him, what do you think he's thinking? He's been known to talk, to perform, but no. The issue here is that he's not thinking. Aron Rex vs. Trevor Lee and Eddie Edwards vs. Mahabali Shera are promised as the other two first round tournament matches for next week.

Delete or Decay

Disclaimers again. Señor Benjamin is digging graves when the Decay show up. They ask what he's doing and move on, and he turns his shovel so we can read how it's labeled "DELETE". They advance on the house, Rosemary says it's home, sweet home. They observe Reby and Maxel through a window and Crazzy Steve says they won't even see them coming as Rosemary makes faces at a spider.

But Broken Matt knew Decay would come, and that declaration sends us to our final commercial break.

Back from break and the two groups advance on each other. The Hardyz have roman candles and set them off, sending the Decay running. There's a ladder set up that the Decay run past and Crazzy Steve knocks over, because why not. The Decay are forced back into the woods as the fireworks run out, and Matt orders Reby back to the house to protect Maxel while he and Jeff exterminate the Decay. More roman candles as Decay takes cover behind Skarsgard, that turncoat!

Abyss tells the others to go get to the house and Brother Nero dropkicks Skarsgard! Señor Benjamin says he needs the boat, though. Matt is hunting Rosemary as Benjamin drags the boat back and takes a picture and it's Joseph Parks! He asks if Benjamin's seen his brother Abyss and gets tazed for his trouble and stuck in the bucket of some kind of farm machinery to be driven off.

Crazzy Steve and Nero fighting over a firepit in a pool, Steve tries to push Nero into the fire but Nero comes back with a gourdbuster into the pool and they fight in the water!

Back to Matt hunting Rosemary again for a moment before Señor Benjamin dumps Parks in one of the graves. Nero and Steve fighting underwater but Nero gets the better, choking him out and leaving him for dead. BUT HE'S NOT DEAD! CRAZZY STEVE PULLS BROTHER NERO BACK IN THE POOL!

Benjamin is working on the graves when Abyss attacks from inside the grave!

STEVE CHOKES NERO WITH A POOL FLOATY! HE RESTORES HIS FACEPAINT WITH A SINGLE SWIPE OF HIS PALMS!

Matt stalking Rosemary, saying delete over and over when Abyss shows up with Janice, ramming her into a tree. Matt says Janice is vermin and his soul does not fear her. Abyss takes a swing and Brother Nero pushes his brother out of the way and takes the shot! Matt is amazed by his selflessness as Abyss and Steve advance, but Vanguard 1 is arming his rockets!

The rockets light one of the symbols cut in the grass on fire, trapping Abyss and Steve within!

Back in the house, Rosemary stands over a broken Reby. SHE HAS MAXEL! BUT VANGUARD 1 IS HERE! He demands she put Maxel down. She complies but spits mist in Vanguard 1's sensor array! She's looking for Maxel when Broken Matt shows up. She's crossed a line she can't return from.

ROSEMARY SPITS THE MIST AND MATT SUCKS IT INTO HIS MOUTH AND SPITS IT BACK! SHE'S BLINDED!

Maxel runs into his father's arms! Brother Nero lies in agony. Crazzy Steve laughs over a fallen Señor Benjamin, who's in the bed of the truck they stole. They've got Señor Benjamin!

My god. That's the show, folks.