TNA Impact results, live blog for April 17, 2014: Handicapping Willow

TNA Impact comes waltzing back into our lives tonight (April 17, 2014) from Orlando, Florida, featuring Eric Young's first show as the heavyweight champion after he defeated Magnus last week to win the title.

Scheduled for the show: Willow takes on Rockstar Spud and EC3 in a handicap match, Bobby Roode issues an open challenge for a Tables match against anyone except Bully Ray, The Wolves vs. Bro Mans for the tag team titles, Velvet Sky vs. Madison Rayne in a Street Fight, and Tigre Uno vs. Sanada in match two of their best of three series for the X Division title.

To follow along as it all goes down come right back here at 9 p.m. ET to hang out with all your favorite folks from this neck of the woods when the show airs on Spike. Hanging out here is guaranteed to enhance your viewing experience.

Enjoy the evening, Cagesiders!

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RESULTS AND LIVE BLOG

With sincerest apologies, Cagesiders, I missed most of the first hour. When I came in, The Wolves were winning by disqualification against the Bro Mans, so they still look incompetent in their tag team title chase, and Willow cut a promo talking about EC3 being dirty sheets and Rockstar Spud being a bloody booger who is inconvenient to life. It took three minutes of viewing this, even coming in late, for it to be awful.

- Willow vs. EC3 and Spud was next. They used blurring camera effects and dark lighting. The announcers have taken to repeatedly explaining that Willow is Jeff Hardy's alter ego. Taz made a joke about having an alter ego of his own who is 6'9''. In the ring, Willow was doing everything Hardy would do but with dancing and screaming. Willow won the match after a Twist of Fate. EC3 tried to break up the cover on Spud but couldn't get there in time. He started beating on Willow and after about a minute Kurt Angle made his big return, sending Carter out of the ring after a belly to back suplex.

- Angle was in the ring with a mic after a commercial. He said EC3 looked like he saw a ghost but he didn't, he just saw Angle and Angle is back. The crowd chanted "welcome back". Angle went on to say that while EC3 thought he ended his career, he's a TNA Hall of Famer and he'll decide when his career is over. That's a scary thought. He said sooner or later they'll be in the ring together and he's a devastation machine who will take his time dismantling Carter limb-by-limb. "You're going to tap out in your mind far before your body does. And EC3 this match won't end until they take you out of here not on a stretcher but in a body bag. Oh it's real, it's damn real." Really? So soon after Warrior you're going to say that and then say it's real? TNA is dumb.

This show is ridiculous and is now an open thread. It's all yours, Cagesiders.