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Deal alert: Touch Joey Ryan’s junk for $30 or get an autographed fork from Marty Martinez

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After writing about a weird week in wrestling (Lego death match, giant pandas, Matanza & Pentagon cosplay, and Stroke Daddy) last Sunday, little did I know the weirdness would be topped so soon.

WrestleMania week in New York City will be full of wrestler merchandise and photo opportunities, but I’m not sure if this steal of a deal can be beaten.

Yes, that’s correct. You can get a photo of touching Joey Ryan’s junk for the low, low price of $30. If you forget the baby oil to prepare for Ryan’s pecker, then perhaps you’ll prefer this offer from Marty Martinez.

Martinez is selling autographed forks (no price mentioned) with a photo opportunity of him stabbing you with it. We shouldn’t expect anything less from such a creepy bastard.

This next picture is unrelated, but since we’re on the topic of weird... Apparently there is a trios team of chickens in Lucha VaVOOM.

What the cluck?

I just have one question left for all you Cagesiders. Anyone out there plan on wearing Janties while attending Wrestlemania?