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GCW Joey Janela’s Spring Break 2 recap: PCO is a beast, the Invisible Man picks up a big win, and Sasuke’s barrel malfunctions

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Just like last time and just like with Bloodsport on Thursday (Apr. 5), GCW Joey Janela’s Spring Break 2 is wacky and wonderful and a traditional recap would not do it justice at all. So if you need full results including finishes you can check our post here, but otherwise I’m gonna bullet point out every cool / exciting / notable thing that happens in each match. On with the show!

  • A little bit of production audio comes over as the show is starting, which is always interesting.
  • We get a video package starring Future Joey Janela as he signs autographs and deals with where his life has gone and meets up with future Lio Rush, who is fat and bald.
  • Someone in the crowd is waving an inflatable alligator around.

DJ Z vs. Eli Everfly vs. Gringo Loco vs. Kyle the Beast vs. Teddy Hart vs. Tony Deppen (Scramble Match)

  • All-out chaos to start!
  • KTB catches Deppen out of mid-air into a spinebuster!
  • Gringo and Tony with a neat lucha sequence, then Deppen out and Everfly in for more of the same.
  • Slick springboard Dragonrana from Eli!
  • Ted Hart with a straight suplex on the floor for Loco!
  • And a wicked inside-out bulldog for DJ!
  • ELECTRIC CHAIR LUNGBLOWER! AND AN ARGENTINE LUNGBLOWER AS WELL!
  • POWERBOMB LUNGBLOWER FOR EVERFLY!
  • And a Canadian backbreaker rack somehow floated around into a powerbomb after that.
  • Moonsault to the floor, Ted Hart doing Ted Hart things.
  • Brillo Gringo!
  • KTB flies with a tope con giro!
  • Everfly with a suicide dive Frankensteiner!
  • And a springboard tornado DDT right into a snap DDT!
  • Loco goes for an avalanche powerbomb... ELI REVERSES TO A FRANKENSTEINER AND DEPPEN BREAKS IT UP!
  • Tony blew snot on Everfly!
  • Blockbuster-assisted triple Russian legsweep DDT from everyone except Hart!
  • Diving DDT and a neckbreaker from Ted followed by a springboard moonsault elbow drop!
  • Springboard Ace Crusher!
  • Loco up under Zema, he slips under, Ion powerbombs Gringo onto KTB!
  • Ted goes for a suplex and Eli reverses to a Frankensteiner! Amazing body control.
  • Deppen busting out some hard strikes, nice change of pace.
  • Everfly has him in the turnbuckles, underhooks... AVALANCHE DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FLIP PILEDRIVER IN NEW ORLEANS!
  • So that was an opener, by god!

James Ellsworth vs. Matt Riddle

  • This match is now billed as champion vs. champion, because it is.
  • Riddle fist-bumped the inflatable alligator!
  • ELLSWORTH WITH A CHOP BLOCK BEFORE THE BELL!
  • DDT on the leg!
  • Riddle back in it with the rolling Karelin lifts!
  • Goozle in the corner and a big chop as Bro gets rolling with the forearms into the exploder and the senton.
  • THE RUNNING KNEE MISSES BY A CHIN’S BREADTH!
  • A low-bridge sents Deep Waters to the floor!
  • Back in, superkick... NOPE!
  • Another superkick... SHOCKINGLY CLOSE!
  • Tuning up the band... RIDDLE CATCHES THE BOOT!
  • BROMISSION IS IN!
  • Very much in the vein of the AJ Styles matches for Ellsworth and just as fun.
  • Jimmy holds up the middle finger as the referee helps him to the back!
  • Before we can get to the next match, Virgil comes to the ring!
  • He’s trying to call somebody out but literally no one can understand him.
  • And he leaves. Sure!

Pierre Carl Ouellet vs. WALTER

  • God, PCO is in such great shape.
  • WALTER gets on the mic! He gives PCO one last chance to back out of the match on account of his age!
  • Pierre makes like he’s gonna leave but instead informs WALTER he should suck it!
  • PCO blocks a chop out the gates, he knows what’s up!
  • ”Hot Sauce” Tracy Williams compares WALTER to Godzilla on commentary, and he’s not wrong.
  • Bull moose shoulder block action and the Ring General gets dumped to the floor.
  • POUNCE!
  • NOW the chop works!
  • But Pierre gives back as good as he gets!
  • EARTHQUAKE!
  • PCO staggered, WALTER shoving and jawing at him, choking him over the middle rope.
  • Back to trading chops!
  • Pierre kicks his leg out of his leg and follows it up with a roundhouse and a DDT!
  • WALTER BACK BODY DROPPED HIM TO THE FLOOR!
  • Action outside, PCO throwing chest kicks over here
  • A table comes into play, PCO tries to powerbomb WALTER through it but the Ring General blocks!
  • PIERRE GOES INTO THE STEPS!
  • PCO PUTS WALTER’S CHOPPING HAND INTO THE RINGPOST REPEATEDLY AND WRENCHES IT ACROSS AS WELL!
  • Headed up top... FIFTY YEARS OLD AND MOONSAULTING TO THE FLOOR!
  • The Ring General smashes his head into the steps and moves the table around to his liking.
  • POWERBOMB THROUGH THE TABLE TO THE FLOOR!
  • BACK IN THE RING FOR ANOTHER POWERBOMB BUT THE REF GOT WIPED OUT BY THE MOONSAULT TO THE FLOOR!
  • BRYCE REMSBURG SHOWS UP BUT HE’S TOO LATE!
  • A big chop, WALTER wants a stoppage but PCO is lucid and won’t quit!
  • Boot to the face, Pierre is busted open!
  • The straps are down and PCO is fired up, taking chop after chop, his chest black and blue!
  • The crowd is on their feet for this chop exchange between behemoths!
  • Seriously, Pierre’s chest is friggin’ purple.
  • SUICIDE DIVE! TOPE CON GIRO! PIERRE CARL OUELLET IS FIFTY YEARS OLD AND WRESTLING LIKE A MAN HALF HIS AGE!
  • AVALANCHE FRANKENSTEINER WHERE IS HE GETTING THE ENERGY FROM?!
  • Fireman’s carry, WALTER blocks and hits a German suplex!
  • Fireman’s carry takes this time... FINLAY ROLL?!
  • ANOTHER MOONSAULT GETS A NEARFALL!
  • Headed up top again and the Ring General cuts him off with chops, jockeying for position, WALTER lets out a primal roar but Pierre chops him to the mat...
  • SENTON ATOMICO!
  • Age really is just a number.
  • Post-match they trade a few more chops and shake hands!

Nick Gage (c) vs. Penta el Zero M (GCW Heavyweight Championship)

  • FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS!
  • Nick gets on the mic to demand some noise and pledges to bring the ultraviolence!
  • Electric atmosphere here with dueling chants of “Cero Miedo” and “MDK”
  • Hand signs in each other’s faces!
  • Action right to the floor and Nick runs into a chair to the face!
  • Another shot to the head! I don’t approve but holy hell it’s happening.
  • Penta dumps Gage into the crowd and gets some doors out from under the ring!
  • Doors set up on opposite corners... NICK WITH THE HIP TOSS THROUGH THE DOOR AND A DOOR SHOT TO THE FACE!
  • Falcon Arrow nearfall!
  • Zero M with the Blu-Ray through a door!
  • Door in hand... he breaks it over Gage’s skull!
  • Penta sets him up on the timekeeper’s table, puts the door on top... AND DOES A LEG DROP OFF THE BARRICADE!
  • Back inside, Penta has some chairs and starts building a structure, setting a door across them and putting him through with a pumphandle driver... NOPE!
  • Door across the back!
  • The chairs are set up again and Zero M sets up another door on them.
  • Up top this time, Gage slips under him... POWERBOMB THROUGH THE DOOR!
  • Chokebreaker!
  • Head trauma aside, hard spot following PCO/WALTER but they made it work.
  • Good sportsmanship!
  • Gage gets on the mic and promises he’ll fight anybody anywhere, including fans! But also he loves us, and if it weren’t for us, he wouldn’t be the wrestler he is.
  • Again, he WILL fight you in the parking lot, people.

David Starr vs. “Lightning” Mike Quackenbush

  • Starr insists on doing his own introductions for the most important match of his career, as he puts it.
  • WALTER on commentary!
  • He mentions he’d love to wrestle Quack himself and I want it. I want it now.
  • Some World of Sport action over a wristlock, classic and well-executed.
  • A drop down actually trips Quack up!
  • Lou Thesz Press into a pin, so smooth.
  • Springboard into a pin and then into a attempt at a crucifix of some kind but the Jewish Cannon gets away!
  • Shot off on a collar and elbow, nice.
  • Manhattan Drop to a stomp to the foot, Quack rolling.
  • Fujiwara armbar across the far side!
  • Off the ropes and Mike grabs an abdominal stretch, Starr reverses, Quack rolls back and right back into the hold!
  • Release slam into the turnbuckles from Davey Wrestling!
  • Fireman’s carry... BLU-RAY!
  • Look At It... only a nearfall!
  • Springboard lariat and Quack goes to the floor hard on his back!
  • A suicide dive follows!
  • Starr stops the count, he’s not gonna win by count-out!
  • Back in, Quack reaches out, off the ropes, to the corner... SHOTEI!
  • Avalanche Frankensteiner!
  • Up top again, the back still bugging him, senton atomico gets a nearfall.
  • Quackendriver III... still no good!
  • Mike getting serious, knucklelock, wrenching it in, Arabian press, into a Frankensteiner but Starr counters with a powerbomb!
  • Duck a lariat, waistlock, standing switch, arms trapped into a bridging northern lights suplex but Quack ain’t giving up yet.
  • Charging in, back body drop to the floor, off the ropes, Cherry Mint DDT blocked, Shotei lands, suplex to the floor blocked and a Shotei puts the Jewish Cannon back in the ring!
  • Springboard tornado DDT from Quack into a suicide dive! Another... CHERRY MINT DDT!
  • Quack recovered, armscissors armbar...
  • HAN STANSEN!
  • The storytelling here, good lord. Starr pushing it harder and harder because he can’t decide whether he’d rather just beat Quack or have the match he’d been dreaming of this entire time all while Quack fights past age and injury to be the guy who was the best indie wrestler in the world for so many years.
  • Starr gets on the mic to explain why the match was so important to him, and that’s because Quack was so influential and without him there wouldn’t be indie wrestling as it exists today.

The Second Annual Clusterf#&%

  • John Thorne on commentary! He is very audibly drunk and this is great.
  • We get a video package showing Maxwell Jacob Friedman trying to sneak into Spring Break and failing repeatedly before being locked into a janitor’s closet.
  • Last year’s winner Jimmy Lloyd at number one!
  • And Session Moth Martina at number two! She’s handing out Mardi Gras beads at ringside and making dudes flash her for the privilege!
  • Moth is grinding on Jimmy. He shoves her away!
  • Lloyd steals a kiss!
  • Orange Cassidy at #3!
  • He takes so long that number four’s music hits and Martina hits a flip DDT and a Bronco Buster!
  • #4 is Wheeler YUTA! He gets in on the Bronco Buster fun but the Session Moth shows him how it’s done.
  • At five, Curt Stallion! He’s all business and gets into it with Wheeler.
  • Looking for an Air Raid Crash as six his... It’s Facade!
  • BURNING HAMMER!
  • Ron Funches on commentary bringing the Sega Genesis game Comix Zone up, what a world.
  • Facade wipes everybody out with a dive to the floor!
  • ROPEWALK COAST TO COAST AND STALLION’S OUTTA THERE!
  • Seven... it’s Hornswoggle! He’s a German suplex machine!
  • At eight, Like a Prayer means only one man... GRADO!
  • He shrugs a German off, takes the straps down and bumps Horny with his belly!
  • Kikutaro at nine! He knocks Swoggle to the mat with a boot as John Thorne confesses he might masturbate if Tracy Smothers comes out next. Whatever floats your boat, my man.
  • At ten... THE INVISIBLE MAN IS HERE! He’s in hot and wiping everyone out but Kikutaro takes him down and flips everyone the wrong bird before getting dumped and eliminated.
  • He taps Hornswoggle out!
  • Chainsaw Joe Gacy at 11! Wicked knee for Facade! Ace Crusher for YUTA!
  • Twelve is... Bryan Idol, but nobody on commentary can remember his name and calls him his old ringname, Earl Cooter.
  • REAL AMERICAN IS PLAYING
  • IS HULK HOGAN HERE?!
  • NO IT’S THE DIRTY DADDY! HE’S SMOKING A CIGARETTE!
  • He puts it out on Gacy’s face!
  • PAZUZU BOMB TO THE FLOOR WHEELER YUTA IS DEAD
  • Dickinson and Grado square off and Chris drops the leg!
  • DAN SEVERN IS IN!
  • IT’S BLOODSPORT ALL OVER AGAIN WITH THEM ROLLING AROUND AND SEVERN CHOKING CHRIS!
  • ALABAMA DOINK IS HERE!
  • THIS IS REAL LIFE!
  • ALABAMA DOINK IS GETTING INTO IT WITH DAN SEVERN!
  • SEVERN ELIMINATES DOINK AND DICKINSON ELIMINATES SEVERN!
  • CZW WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION RICKEY SHANE PAGE IN A GCW RING!
  • Twist of Fate!
  • Markus Crane up next, bringing it to Dickinson with a springboard Stunner that doesn’t quite go right.
  • PAZUZU BOMB!
  • YOSHI TONIC INTO THE CORNER!
  • Aero Boy and Crazy Boy come in together!
  • They double team the Dirty Daddy and take him out!
  • Rory Gulak is here, working his older brother’s 205 Live gimmick!
  • SPYDER NATE WEBB?! He’s intent on slapping hands with literally everyone in the crowd.
  • He’s got an inflatable shark! For a second!
  • Literally he let his entire theme play, pro wrestling is the best.
  • SOYLENT GREEN!
  • ”All Ego” Ethan Page is getting into it with Nate Webb, what a world.
  • Hey, MJF made it through! He jaws with All Ego and the DTU luchadors roll up and get eliminated!
  • RSP in and MJP and Page double team him to take him out!
  • Martina’s back and she’s pulled the condom out of her pants! ALL EGO TAKES IT IN THE MOUTH!
  • She’s got Maxwell’s arm trapped between her legs and breaks his wrist with her lady garden!
  • She gets eliminated but Orange Cassidy is back! He’s really taking it to Friedman and Page, double goozle and everything.
  • ORANGE MIST! DOUBLE CHOKESLAM! ORANGE CASSIDY IS RUNNING WILD! Up top... splash... nobody’s home and he’s out. Thanks for playing, Orange.
  • THE INVISIBLE MAN IS BACK! DOUBLE DROPKICK ON ETHAN AND MJF! LLOYD LAYS HIM OUT WITH A SUPERKICK... JUMPING PILEDRIVER!
  • Jimmy’s eliminated for violating the commission’s rules with the piledriver!
  • Webb and Page again, running DDT, MJF in, Busaiku Knee... NATE WEBB’S STILL IN IT!
  • They’re hurling abuse at Bryce for his call!
  • BRYCE BODY SLAMS MJF! OFF THE ROPES FOR A TORNADO DDT ON ALL EGO!
  • MJF hits him with a low blow into the pumphandle Samoan drop!
  • ...Bryce Remsburg has been eliminated?
  • MIKEY WHIPWRECK?! He’s running wild on the rudos! WHIPPERSNAPPER! WEBB ELIMINATES PAGE OFF IT!
  • Whipwreck up top, avalanche Whippersnapper denied, Friedman takes him out with a splash!
  • MJF dumps Webb but the bell doesn’t ring!
  • THE INVISIBLE MAN IS STILL IN! HE ROLLS MJF UP!
  • I think they managed to one-up the original, folks.

Great Sasuke vs. Joey Janela

  • Joey Janela punched Frank the Clown, what a time to be alive.
  • Sasuke is blessing everyone on his way in.
  • Mat grappling is not how I expected this one to start but it’s fun.
  • Shoulder block and Sasuke kips back up into prayer position! Janela boots him again, same thing, and again on a third time and a fourth!
  • Great has Joey hypnotized and makes him dump himself on his head!
  • To the floor and Sasuke goes under the ring for plunder, setting up a ladder and clobbering Janela with a cookie sheet!
  • Whip reversed and it’s Sasuke that eats the ladder!
  • Joey clears a table, sets Great up on top of it, but Sasuke recovers before he can do whatever he’s planning... PRESS SLAM OFF THE APRON THROUGH THE TABLE!
  • Sasuke takes the ladder into the ring and applies a nerve hold to wear Joey down and get him onto it.
  • SENTON ATOMICO BUT JOEY MOVED AND SASUKE GOT HIS HEAD STUCK IN THE LADDER OH GOD
  • THE INFLATABLE ALLIGATOR IS IN PLAY! ALLIGATOR ASSISTED SPLASH FOR A NEARFALL!
  • Joey and Penelope Ford assemble a big pile of chairs and the Bad Boy starts building a contraption out of them.
  • He lays Sasuke across them but the vet wakes up and gets under him... POWERBOMB INTO THE BACKS OF THE ARRANGED CHAIRS!
  • Great gets some of the leftover pieces of door from Gage/Penta and a few intact doors as well.
  • KARATE ATTACK!
  • Sasuke just beat him over the head with a door like it was a chair.
  • JOEY PUT SASUKE HEAD FIRST INTO THE DOOR!
  • WHIP REVERSED AND JANELA GOES THROUGH A DOOR AS WELL!
  • To the apron, trading punches, Joey with an eyepoke, fireman’s carry, he dedicates this to the Dirtbike Kid and hits the DVD on the apron!
  • Janela demolishing the table with a chair for some reason before setting the chair up and putting Sasuke in it... SWANTON TO THE FLOOR BUT GREAT MOVES OUT OF THE WAY!
  • Adjusting a table... TOPE CON GIRO PUTS JOEY THROUGH IT!
  • Penelope Ford is in the ring, distracting Sasuke with the power of dance!
  • Joey with a rolling elbow off the distraction!
  • Corner to corner, smashing a legend’s face into the turnbuckle before locking a figure four leglock on in the middle of the ring!
  • Up top, moonsault... NOBODY HOME!
  • Sasuke trying to set up a broken table AND THE BARREL IS HERE! Well okay it’s a square trash can but same deal.
  • Great Sasuke puts it on his head and climbs the turnbuckles before giving up and throwing it at Janela!
  • SENTON ATOMICO THROUGH THE TABLE BUT JOEY DUCKED!
  • Janela puts the barrel on his head and mocks Sasuke!
  • Back in the ring, trading strikes, a superkick and Penelope hands Joey the ladder. MICHINOKU DRIVER ON THE LADDER! NOT ENOUGH!
  • Joey puts a chair on Sasuke... DIVING DOUBLE STOMP!
  • Janela cuts a promo and declares Sasuke is his new dad!
  • KARAOKE TIME WITH GREAT SASUKE AND JOEY JANELA!
  • They legitimately sung all of the Bon Jovi song It’s My Life together on iPPV. I don’t even have words.

There you have it, folks

Joey Janela’s Spring Break 2 absolutely lived up to the first one’s wild and wonderful mix of everything that’s great and absurd about pro wrestling. Every match was different, every match delivered, it’s one of the best shows of the year, if you like pro wrestling, especially if you like indie wrestling, you owe it to yourself to watch this one.

Watch the VOD ASAP on WWNLive or FITE, folks.