Tropic Thunderbastard went up on Demand Progress yesterday, so let's have at it, shall we?
The show opens, a mite unusually, with footage of Sebastian, angry at being left off the show, hijacking the Facebook Live pre-show and putting Pastor William Eaver in charge of the ring crew. What a dick.
Kings of the North (Bonesaw & Damien Corvin) vs. London Riots (James Davis & Rob Lynch)
Glove shenanigans early, then the Riots' trademark cricket bat comes into play, Davis tossing it for a fakeout into a wicked elbow strike. From there the match breaks down and the action spills outside for a fountain of dives. Back in the ring, the Riots run roughshod over the Kings.
The Kings manage a good long run of double-team offense in return but nothing seems able to put James Davis away. But ol' JD manages to catch one King with a stunner and the other with a big Rock Bottom and gets the tag, leaving Rob to go wild with suplexes!
A lungblower > Codebreaker > German suplex sequence nearly gets the Kings the win, but a few exchanges later...
London Riots win by pinfall with the slingshot spear.
London Riots doing London Riots things is always a fine time to be had, but this fell a bit flat compared to recent efforts against the likes of Ringkampf and the New Nation.
Before the next match, Jim Smallman announces that Paul Robinson is injured and will not be able to compete in the Thunderbastard match, but Jon Briley assures him they're working on a replacement and will have eight men competing.
Chakara vs. Laura Di Matteo (Natural Progression Series IV First Round Match)
Chakara charges in hard out the gate! Going for a powerbomb or a Gory Special maneuver and Laura fights out, so we have a match! Di Matteo launches herself out of the ring on a suicide dive like a torpedo! Chakara yanks Laura off the second with a trip and takes charge for a good while, including a wicked repeat cravate facebreaker snapmared into a dropkick.
Laura makes a comeback, dodging and diving until she catches Chakara with a lariat that leaves both women wiped out on the mat. Forearm for forearm, Di Matteo with big lariats, an enzuigiri, headscissors takeover, turning missile dropkick! Chakara locks a bodyscissors Kimura lock on but Laura fights out with punishing forearm strikes!
Chakara fends off a tornado DDT, hits a hammerlock DDT of her own... no good! She's shocked, but Di Matteo has her wits about her...
Laura Di Matteo wins by submission with a grounded octopus hold.
A little loose at points but a good match. Digging Di Matteo refining and doubling down on the submission aspects of her wrestling, too.
Jim addresses the Thunderbastard opening and tells Pastor William Eaver to go ahead and head backstage, he's a former Progress Champion and he's earned a spot well over!
Jurn Simmons vs. Roy Johnson
Good lord, Roy has electronic glasses that declare his intent to get wavy in scrolling text! Jurn's entrance is also notable, being very, ah... pelvic. And also quite schlong. Er, long.
Jurn using his size right off to bully Roy in the corner but the tenor shifts into more even big lad strength testing, shoulder blocks and the like. Simmons with the Oklahoma (Frisia?) Stampede! And from there he remains in charge for a bit, whipping the Body Guy post to post.
Roy back in with lariats and a Samoan drop, but Jurn cuts him off with a dropkick. Johnson keeps trying to create openings for himself but the massive Dutchman is on him at every turn. Doctor Bomb! Jurn gets caught with a ripcord flapjack! He goes for Last Set but Simmons slips away and clocks him with a Sick Kick!
Jurn Simmons wins by pinfall with a sit-out piledriver.
Very fun HOSS FIGHT with a bit of David and Goliath to it to make it stand out. Although points off for giving me the Oklahoma Stampede and a Doctor Bomb but not completing the "Dr. Death" Steve Williams tribute with a Backdrop Driver, Jurn. Maybe next time, eh?
Ringkampf (Axel Dieter, Jr. & WALTER) vs. South Pacific Power Trip (TK Cooper & Travis Banks)
Bit of grappling early courtesy of Banks and Dieter, with Banks eventually getting enough of an upper hand to tag Cooper in. TK wastes his time getting a good luck kiss, and so Axel ducks his axehandle and takes him right over to Walter! Cooper throws a shoulder block and Walter might as well have been run into by a child, so little he moves.
TK keeps trying, and Walter plays along to wipe him out with a shoulder block of his own off the ropes! Another kiss, Cooper's fired up, he throws a chop... nope. Walter lights him up in return! Banks in, same deal! Stop trying to chop Walter, lads!
A forearm from Cooper actually wobbles Walter a bit but he's able to keep his head on and trade boots, laying the Power Trip lad out! Dieter back in, pixel-perfect scraping the ears on a stomp! Working Cooper over with tags now, Walter gets a sleeper in and TK barely throws him off! EARTHQUAKE SPLASH! BANKS MAKES THE SAVE!
Cooper out of a fireman's carry with a rake of the face, he keeps trying to hit Walter even though it's clearly not doing any good. Walter takes him to Suplexburg and Travis makes the save again! Dieter takes care of Banks and tags in, Cooper's strikes actually land on him but he's able to crotch him and the match breaks down for a moment.
TK hits an axe kick but Chris Roberts comes to the count late and can't finish Axel off. Chaining offense together on Dieter to try and finish him but the Power Trip can't do it. Axel comes off the ropes for an uppercut and offers a boot for the tag! Walter in, he LEVELS Banks with a boot that might have dislodged teeth!
Snap brainbuster from Dieter, Walter follows with a shotgun dropkick that launches Banks across the ring! Walter up top but Dahlia Black sticks her nose in and lets her boys slam him off the top! Double chickenwing into an Ace Crusher takes care of Axel but Walter levels both men with a lariat!
Ringkampf looking to finish it but Travis evades, Dieter flies! Banks diving in return! Cooper hit a corkscrew moonsault onto both men! Walter surveys the room for a dive of his own but Travis comes in to stop him, so he just press slams him onto Cooper!
Fireman's carry gutbuster, TK breaks it up. Walter hooks Banks for a powerbomb and Axel assists with a diving uppercut! Dahlia on the apron trying to distract referee Chris Roberts... Walter boots her off the apron! TK's fired up! He goozles Walter, Walter reverses... CHOKESLAM TO THE OUTSIDE!
Cooper back at the big man with a chair as Dieter breaks Banks on the ringpost. Misadventure continues, Travis lays TK out by accident, hits a wicked knee strike on Dieter but the Ringkampf man catches a followup dive into an Air Raid Crash! Suplex from the apron inside but Cooper holds the legs...
South Pacific Power Trip win by pinfall with a crossbody press from Travis Banks on Axel Dieter, Jr.
What an awesome match. I'm absolutely in love with Ringkampf as a team after just a few appearances for Progress, and the Power Trip get better and better every time out. Let's have a rematch, eh?
8-Man Thunderbastard Match
Mark Andrews enters at #1.
Marty Scurll enters at #2.
Marty forces Andrews in the corner and makes a clean break... and makes a clean break... and keeps breaking... and he's on the apron... and he's up the ramp... and he's back on the apron... and he's back in the ring... and Mark dropkicks him in the face!
Trent Seven enters at #3.
Trent takes his sweet time getting to the ring and the Villain is ready to meet him! He goes for the apron superkick but Seven trips him, giving Andrews time to fly! Trent dives as well, then Marty connects with apron superkicks for both men.
Jack Sexsmith enters at #4.
Jack's in with butt bumps, one blocked, atomic drop connects, then he conspires to force Trent to powerbomb Marty! Pearl Neckbreaker clutched, Andrews over... neckbreaker/DDT combo! Fireman's carry Michinoku Driver from Seven sends Sexsmith outside where Scurll throws him into the barricade.
Pastor William Eaver enters at #5.
Sebastian enters at #5.
Nobody in the match wants anything to do with Sebastian, collectively taking a walk... except for Jack!
Jack Sexsmith eliminates Sebastian with a schoolboy pin.
Sebastian hits his spinning Killswitch on Jack and takes him outside for more abuse, but Pastor Eaver runs down! Sebastian pushes him around a bit... BILL PUNCHES HIM IN THE FACE!
Zack Gibson enters at #6.
Gibson gets on the mic to do his deal, to thunderous boos as always... ANDREWS DIVES ON HIM! Scurll stops Mark from doing any real followup, and he and Trent form an impromptu alliance against the Origin man. Tower of Doom set up but Andrews can't power them over as the timer counts down...
Nathan Cruz enters at #7.
He yanks Andrews out and back suplexes him on the apron. He and Gibson hit a slingshot back suplex / neckbreaker combo on Seven but it isn't enough. They keep beating on Trent two-on-one, however.
Dave Mastiff enters at #8.
Cruz and Gibson try to figure out the most appropriate way to greet their somewhat estranged brother-in-Origin, Zack removing Dave's banter hat but Andrews kind of answers the question by getting involved. Mastiff suplexes him aside and meets his fellows thumbs up... but turns it into a thumbs down! Double lariat!
Trent looking for Seven Stars, Dave suplexes him across the ring and the Villain is in trying to make friends. Mastiff offers the thumbs up but Scurll snaps his thumb! Marty's fied up for the chickenwing but Trent runs in...
Trent Seven eliminates Marty Scurll by pinfall with a schoolboy pin.
The Bastard stalks the British Strong Style man and they go slugging it out, Mastiff leveling him with a lariat to win the exchange! He dumps Gibson... BIG LAD SUICIDE DIVE! Nathan tries to blindside him but it doesn't work one bit. Kick to the gut, up for a powerbomb but Gibson lays him out with a chop block!
Origin men pounding on the man they once called friend before he started having fun...
Nathan Cruz eliminates Dave Mastiff by pinfall with a double Codebreaker.
Andrews in, he reverses a brainbuster to Stundog Millionaire, straight suplex...
Mark Andrews eliminates Trent Seven by pinfall with a standing moonsalt.
Mark's facing the Origin down two-on-one now... Jack Sexsmith lives! He's got Mr. Cocko out! Two Mr. Cockos! Double butt claw! Double Cocko! Cruz has him hooked for a Tombstone in return but Andrews dropkicks him over and things get chaotic. Nathan with a fireman's carry but Sexsmith jams Cocko in his mouth and takes him down...
Jack Sexsmith eliminates Nathan Cruz by submission with the Crippler Cockface!
Jack and Andrews stare each other down but Gibson comes in. Zack knocks Sexsmith aside and fights with Mark a bit before knocking him clean outside. Jack lies in wait with Mr. Cocko, Gibson hits a cross chop on his throat, Ticket to Ride... SEXSMITH OUT AT ONE!
Slap across the face, Jack is fired up! Forearm on forearm, off the ropes, under a lariat, flying chop, he spikes Gibson with the big DDT! From Dusk 'til Dawn Cockface! Gibson desperately wants to tap but he fights out! Jack looking for the big DDT again, Zack reverses...
Zack Gibson eliminates Jack Sexsmith by pinfall with Helter Skelter.
Andrews throwing strikes one handed but Zack catches him with a hammerlock Divorce Court. Overhead wristlock suplex, he's just going to town on the arm. He goes and gets a mic to finish doing his deal! Boos rain down as he punctuates each bit with kicks.
Mark cuts him off but eats a back elbow is down and hurting again as Gibson continues to boast. He doesn't care what company "this little runt" wants to work for, or what the powers that be want him to do, because ironically enough, you can't stop progress.
He goes back to the arm but Andrews hits an enzuigiri! Back elbow, boot up, to the second, wheelbarrow bulldog, standing moonsault senton... NOT ENOUGH! Diving Ticket to Ride... MARK ANDREWS LIVES! Pin exchanges, Gibson nearly gets the Shankly Gates in, dodges Stundog Millionaire, the Gates are on!
Andrews get the ropes! Wheelbarrow blocked, the Gates are back on! Mark somehow breaks it and hits a standing shiranui! Lying in wait on the apron, he springboards into a chop to the throat and takes a devastating lariat! Helter Skelter... reversed! Andrews off the top...
Mark Andrews wins, last eliminating Zack Gibson by pinfall with a shooting star press and becoming #1 contender to the Progress Championship.
Awesome match, from the Eaver/Sebastian stuff finally boiling over, to Jack's star turn and late run with the double Cockos, to the Origin stuff, to Mark Andrews desperate one-armed run to victory against Zack Gibson.
Jimmy Havoc vs. Pete Dunne (c) (Progress Championship)
Trent is behind Jimmy before the bell rings, he hooks Havoc for Seven Stars but Jimmy grabs the title belt out of Pete's mouth and cracks him with it to counter!
Looking for an Acid Rainmaker on Dunne, jockeying, he ends up getting a flying headscissors! Pete to the apron, triangle forearm strike takes the action outside. Slugging it out, poke to the eye, face to the ringpost, Jimmy throws the champion deep into the crowd.
Pillar to post the beating continues in much the same way but Dunne manages to scrape some separation as Trent tries to get involved. Chops missed into the ringpost, Peter thrown into the wall but he comes back hooking Havoc's nose and throwing him into the crowd!
It's Pete's turn to keep the heat on now, but Jimmy comes charging out of the crowd with a wild forearm! Back to the ring... HAVOC HITS A SUICIDE DIVE DDT ON THE FLOOR! Jimmy takes a drink from a fan, tries for the triangle forearm again but Dunne's ready this time and clocks him with one of his own!
The mouthguard is out, so it's time for finger biting... HE BIT HARD ENOUGH TO CUT JIMMY'S FINGER OPEN! He's got Havoc trapped on the mat, standing on his head for some small joint manipulation and a wicked stomp to the ribs. Jim Breaks Special, to the mat for the elbow stomp that always makes me sick to my stomach.
A second sets up a kick to the elbow and Jimmy goads him into trading forearms so he can level the champ. Going for Acid Rainmaker but his bleeding finger stops him short! Rebound German suplex, X-Plex... no good! Back to the arm and fingers, whip across, Havoc catches him with a dropkick.
Elbow into a Death Valley Driver, Havoc's calling for the Acid Rainmaker but Pete bites the thumb on the throat slash. Fair is fair and Jimmy bites his fingers, more exchanges, Go 2 Sleep begets a lariat, Havoc slips out of Drop Dead and counters with a DDT!
Acid Rainmaker clutched, Dunne uses referee Chris Roberts to block, kick to the balls, hooks him for the Pedigree... NO GOOD! Peter with the pumphandle but a chant about him not being at the Rumble makes him break for a crotch chop. Pumphandle again, Jimmy reverses, Acid Rainmaker, Dunne throws him off, elbow to Trent on the apron, back in... ACID RAINMAKER!
Trent pulls Roberts out of the ring! Havoc takes care of him, back in, ducking and dodging, another Acid Rainmaker... Trent breaks up the pin!
Jimmy Havoc wins by disqualification.
Awesome match, natural but disappointing finish. Cannot believe Pete bit the finger hard enough to draw blood.
Peter goes and gets some chairs as Trent crotch chops the crowd. They put the beating on Jimmy with the chairs, walloping him. Dunne goes for a pedigree...
FLASH MORGAN WEBSTER IS HERE! He backs off for a second, motioning...
MARK HASKINS IS HERE ALSO! They fist bump and hit the ring to clear British Strong Style out! Haskins is beating Dunne's head in, a clear challenge to the man who holds the title he never lost!
Trent manages to get one up on Morgan but Haskins locks the Sharpshooter on! Webster has a guillotine choke on Pete when he tries to break it up!
Haskins gets on the mic and calls Pete a "disrespectful little prick" and says he's seen how he treats everybody in Progress. He has his guys, and he thinks he's untouchable, but he has something that belongs to Haskins. He continues, saying Havoc is dealing with Ospreay, and...
HASKINS AND WEBSTER ARE CLEARED TO WRESTLE!
If they want a war, they got one! Havoc and Haskins shake hands, the deal is sealed!
Havoc heads backstage, chair in hand while Haskins and Webster soak in the adulation of the crowd.
A really good show from Progress here. Started a bit slow, but when it hit a boil, boy did it! A tag match that hit all the spots, a Thunderbastard that set several stories into overdrive, and that ending! So good to have Haskins and Webster back, and in an unlikely alliance with Jimmy Havoc, no less. Can’t wait to see it all play out.
Make sure to check it out on Demand Progress, folks, it's a keeper.