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AEW Rewind: Ethan Page bigger than Jesus, Anthony Bowens channeling Professor X, more!

Don’t have time to follow all of AEW’s online content? Don’t worry. We got you covered with the AEW Rewind, which will rewind through social media bits and YouTube videos from the past week to prepare you for Wednesday night Dynamite.

This week’s ‘Road to’ video hyped Ethan Page versus Miro in the All-Atlantic Championship qualifier and Chris Jericho versus Ortiz in Hair versus Hair.

Scorpio Sky reminded us that Page has the tightest tits in the game. Page backed that up with some choice lines in his promo in regard to Miro’s war with God.

Ethan Page: This is a guy that has given all credit to somebody for his success. And then, he’s the first person to blame somebody else for his downfall. You know who I pray to, Miro? The man in the freaking mirror. “All Ego” Ethan Page is the only thing and person and being that I truly, truly believe in.

Buddy, Jesus wears a chain with Ethan Page on the cross. I, I am the holier than though being in AEW. And you, sir, will be praying to me.

Touching on interesting nuggets from Elevation and Dark, Serena Deeb tagged with Mercedes Martinez to one-up each other. Tension was evident over desire for the ROH Women’s World Championship. Bobby Fish defeated Brock Anderson via submission, but Fish refused to relent after the bell. That caused Darby Allin to run in for the save. Allin’s beef with reDRagon rages on. Daniel Garcia earned victory in trios action, and he didn’t even have to remove his sports entertainer hat to do it. Frankie Kazarian battled Ethan Page. Dan Lambert lent a helping hand to place Page’s foot on the bottom rope to break a pinfall. When Kaz put hands on Lambert, Page scored a roll-up to win. The aftermath saw appearances from Scorpio Sky and Christopher Daniels. The Fallen Angel made the save and challenged Page. Keeping with story consistency, Page reminded CD and Kaz that they can never tag together again in AEW.

FTR were the latest guests on RJ City’s talk show, Hey! (EW). City broke out a new theme song and proposed ways to improve FTR’s likeability as good guys. FTR mentioned that their sweet truck broke down and is still at Daily’s Place. FTR also discussed a three-way with Dax Shepard. Top guys, out. City replied to FTR’s closing catchphrase with, “I heard that in an orgy once.”

This week’s Being the Elite (here) was the uncut FanFest BTE Championship defense and live panel. Brandon Cutler started the video with news that he caught a case of COVID and was unable to be available to film fresh footage. Cutler has since recovered without issue.

We’ll close with a dose of chuckles from the Acclaimed and the Gunn Club. Anthony Bowens channeled his Professor X powers for some scissor action.

I hope AEW dishes these out every week. It reminds me of the old-school territory promos. I’m sure papa Billy would be proud of the Acclaimed’s work in that video. Scissor party for all!