AEW Dark recap (Mar. 29, 2022): The Beast from the East

Episode 136 of AEW Dark is in the books! If you missed the live broadcast click here for the Cageside Seats stream from YouTube. Your commentary team this week was Excalibur and Taz. Without further adieu let’s get straight into Tuesday night’s action!

The Factory (Aaron Solo, QT Marshall & Nick Comoroto) vs. Invictus Khash, Adam Priest & Gus De La Vega

QT Marshall walked down to Justin Roberts and berated him for how his last name was pronounced before the match even got underway. Khash, Priest and Gus De La Vega were already waiting for them. Excalibur and Taz seemed more interested in talking about Hook’s certificate of accomplishment on Rampage than this match. Solo knocked down Priest with a shoulder tackle. Priest hit a dropkick, and Solo hit one right back in response. Comoroto tagged in and crushed Priest with a right hand. Priest ran away and GDLV made a blind tag, so Comoroto stacked them up like cordwood. Solo tagged back in and dropped GDLV with a corkscrew kick before tagged Marshall, and the fans at this taping promptly booed him. He didn’t stay long though and we wound up with Khash and Solo, with Khash running wild before Marshall came in to hit Diamond Cutters on everyone. Comoroto did a back breaker and Solo did a double stomp, but Solo pulled Khash back up before the three count. He gave Khash a Pedigree to finish him off. Taz: “The Factory is a well oiled machine for sure.”

Lelia Grey vs. Emi Sakura

Sakura had a record of 26-19 for this match. Her opponent Grey was waiting in the ring sporting a record of 0-3 in AEW. Sakura wasted no time destroying her and applying the Romero Special, cackling like a villain from 1980’s anime. She kept grabbing a handful of hair and waiting for the referee to count to four before immediately releasing it and grabbing some with her other hand. Grey finally got on offense with a Russian leg sweep and a pump kick, but Sakura took control again with chops and a flying crossbody into the corner. Backbreaker, second rope Vader Bomb, done. Sakura got referee Rick Knox to clap along to her theme song after it was over.

Diamante vs. Kelsey Heather

Diamante was 37-20 in AEW before this match got underway. Heather was 0-1 and waiting for her in the squared circle. Diamante pummeled her with shots in one corner then bounced her head off the turnbuckle in another. Short arm clothesline, suplex, near fall. Heather tried to get to the apron to catch a breather and Diamante kicked her off to the floor, then ran her over with a clothesline. She threw Heather back in and grabbed a handful of hair. Heather appeared to have a broken nose as blood as streaming down her face. Perhaps that’s why Diamante immediately put her in a submission for the finish.

Dark Order (Evil Uno, Stu Grayson, Alan Angels) w/ -1 vs. Jay Marte, Richard King & Alexander Zane

53-31, 54-18 and 26-46 were Uno, Grayson and Angels respectively. Marte, King and Zane were making their debut as a trio and didn’t even get their singles records shown on screen. It doesn’t matter though as there’s not a win to be found between them. As The Rock used to say, “It doesn’t matter what your name is!” Uno used referee Mike Posey for an assisted neckbreaker, then Grayson hit a backbreaker and Angels hit a frog splash for the pin.

Frankie Kazarian vs. Kaun

Kaz brought a record of 67-29 to this match. Kaun was 0-1 in singles competition to this point but I was happy to see him back on the Dark brand. Shout out to Shane Taylor Promotions BTW. Kaun tried to wear Kaz down with holds but it was the back elbow that did the most damage, making Kaz sells his nose. No blood though unlike Heather earlier. Kaun hit a gut buster and Taz dubbed him “Lung Blower Jones.” Kaz jumped right up to his feet though and came off the ropes with a crossbody and a flying elbow. Kaun ate double knees to the back, a lariat to the front, and you know what’s next - crossface chicken wing. I really hope they sign Kaun and give him a push at some point. He’s paying his dues... for now.

Tay Conti (w/ -1 & Anna Jay) vs. Shalonce Royal

Conti came out 54-10 for this bout. Royal brought a record of 0-2 along with her operatic singing voice. Conti was more interested in hearing Royal squeal in pain though. Conti kicked her arms when she tried to hang onto the ropes, Royal took control when she got back up and did a splash in the corner, -1 distracted her and Conti decked her. She threw Royal back into the ring and Conti kicked her in the chest repeatedly. Three straight pump kicks left Royal reeling and Conti finished her with a Gotch-Style piledriver. Not the best looking one I’ve seen, I might add. Royal’s head didn’t even come close to the canvas. Then again as DDP used to say, “That’s not a bad thing. That’s... a good thing.”

Dark Order (John Silver, Alex Reynolds & Preston Vance) w/ -1 vs. Foxx Vinyer, Brandon Bullock & Jameson Ryan

Dark Order brought a trios record of 7-0 in this formation while Taz complained that -1 was coming out for every single match. Vinyer, Bullock and Ryan were (say it with me now) “making their trios debut” in this match. We had a cluster in the middle of the ring until Dark Order cleaned house and all flexed their biceps. Vance threw haymakers and a double clothesline before tagging in Silver, and Silver hit a big back elbow and a spinebuster for two. Vance said if you can do it, I can do it even better. Then they took turns doing German suplexes. Double arm drag, tag, and the Pendulum Bomb. Another decisive Dark squash — double entendre very much intended.

Nyla Rose (w/ Vickie Guerrero) vs. Kiera Hogan

Hogan came out with a record of 5-2 and seemed fired up for the main event. Rose brought a record of 64-23. I’m not sure any modern day wrestler reminds me more of Awesome Kong than Nyla Rose. She’s built like a brick you-know-what house, she’s incredibly agile, and she’s a natural entertainer. After running over her opponent at the barricade, she turned to the camera and said “Remember kids — only you can prevent Kiera Hogans.” I don’t want to prevent Kiera Hogans now or ever but that’s besides the point. Hogan made her comeback with a dropkick, a leg sweep, and a sliding heel to the head. Hogan did the leg drop and made a cover for two. She went for a head kick, Rose caught it, and Rose gave her a choke slam with authority. Spear, Beast Bomb, done. At least Hogan got a little bit of shine here. Hogan will be a world champion in AEW one day, just not today.

What to watch/skip

This week’s “what to watch/skip” is brought to you by Blahzay Blahzay, because when the East is in the house — danger!! (Oh my God.) This was an incredibly fast episode of Dark that just barely clocked in at over 40 minutes, so much like Elevation last night I’m hard pressed to complain about much. I want AEW to do more with Kaun, Kiera Hogan and Grey. I’d like to see Diamante pick up wins that put her into title contention. That’s about it. Unless you can’t stand a diet of squash this was a quick and filling meal.

Cageside commentary crew! I welcome your feedback in the comments section below. I’m also on Twitter if you want to hit me up there. See you next Monday night for Elevation!