All Elite Wrestling comes our way from the UNO Lakefront Arena in New Orleans. Last week, Adam Cole stole a win from Christian Cage and got a Texas Death Match from the champ as a reward. Samoa Joe soundly defeated Max Caster to qualify for the Owen Hart Tournament. Jay Lethal promised Samoa Joe a “gift he’ll never forget.” Captain Shawn Dean proved that he was the superior Shawn when he pinned Shawn Spears. MJF’s “brilliant” plan to keep Wardlow away from him failed brilliantly. The Jericho Appreciation Society ran away from Eddie Kingston. Jade banned Marina from The Baddie Section. The AFO and The Goth Boys continued to have messy (fun) shenanigan-filled matches. Hikaru Shida qualified for the Owen Hart Tournament and narrowly avoided a clash with her old rival Serna Deeb. Team Taz tried to ambush Swerve Strickland, but Keith Lee was there to even the odds. And finally, FTR narrowly defeated The Young Bucks in an epic tag match that will surely be a match of the year contender!
This Week’s Headliner:
JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE JOE
So AEW Dynamite is cool and all, and there are lots of real good matches and super neat wrestlers on the roster, but literally none of that matters anymore. The only thing that matters is Samoa Joe and his legal sanctioned murder.
On actual televised programming that we get for FREE and get to see with our eyeballs, Samoa Joe will go one-on-one with Minoru Suzuki tonight for the Ring of Honor Television Championship.
I just...want to cry blood tears of joy.
Now, to be frank, I barely have any idea what the hell is going on in ROH. This seems like a dream match that will be brutal and awesome, but I don’t actually know the likelihood of the championship switching hands.
It would be sort of weird to saddle Joe with an ROH championship considering the waves he could make in AEW, but also, AEW owns ROH, and we’re not totally sure how that will be folded into the television landscape/AEW multiverse yet so...it could also be a good thing. Like, they could make him one of the faces of the new ROH since he’s literally the face of the old ROH.
That makes a sort of sense as Samoa Joe losing this soon on TV would be weird...but is losing to Minoru Suzuki really even losing? Oh, and don’t forget about Jay Lethal (gods I wish I could) and his promised “gift” to Samoa Joe. It seems likely that he will be the cause of Samoa Joe’s loss here if that happens.
Honestly, though, who cares. What we all really care about is OMG SAMOA JOE VS MINORU SUZUKI!
The Title Scene:
World Champion Hangman Adam Page has had ENOUGH of Adam Cole and is ready to put him out of his misery Texas Death Match Style. You know, for a man from Virginia, he sure loves Texas Death Matches. This match will be happening later in the week, but you better believe we’ll get some video packages and/or promos hyping this match.
However, it’ll be a busy night for Adam Cole because his Undisputed Elite bros, reDRagon are finally battling for the Tag Team Championships tonight against Jurassic Express. This is one I could see going either way. Jurassic Express are fantastic champs, but if reDRagon wins that could give Adam Cole the boost he needs to face Adam Page later this week. Or...it could end in chaos and a finish that requires a rematch...yeah that seems likely.
And that doesn’t even take into consideration all the craziness happening in the tag division. We got FTR and The Young Bucks putting on clinics. All the AFO tag teams taking on the HardyS. Sting and Darby Allin, you know, existing. The AEW tag division is a shenanigans machine!
The World Women’s Champion has agreed to face Nyla Rose at Battle of the Belts this Saturday. This will be Thunder Rosa’s first official defense as champion. It’s her chance to prove to everyone that she really is ready to change the direction of the division.
IDK how people think Sammy Guevara is the heel here. Sure he’s young and has a hot girlfriend, but I will never tire of these two young, hot, talented people calling Dan Lambert old and gross while destroying his property. I would feel bad for the actual TNT Champion Scorpio Sky that he isn’t even the face of this feud, but he chose to align himself with Lambert, so this is the price he must pay
The next time Jade Cargill defends her TBS Championship, it will be against former MMA fighter but actual good wrestler Marina Shafir. Jade doesn’t seem threatened by Shafir, but that might change tonight when she makes her Dynamite debut.
Other things to keep an eye on:
-Jericho Appreciation Society fears Eddie Kingston and Santana & Ortiz. Why else would they run away from them? Tonight they have a “good old fashioned six-man tag.” It’s the wrestlers vs. the sports entertainers!
-CM Punk is focused on the AEW championship. But to get that match, he knows he has to earn it. So tonight he goes one-on-one for the first time ever with Penta Oscura. This match will be great, but I wonder if it will have any interference from The House of Black??? You never know when things will get spooky on AEW.
Team Taz, Ricky Starks & Powerhouse Hobbs have made it their life mission to derail Keith Lee & Swerve Strickland’s momentum in AEW, but it hasn’t been too easy for them. Tonight Lee & Strickland team up officially to end Team Taz’s interference. Can we start the fight forever chants now?
-MJF’s lackey Shawn Spears couldn’t get the job done last week. Capt defeated him. Shawn Dean and he was unable to protect MJF from Wardlow. Tonight Spears will be sitting in his chair ruminating over his mistakes while MJF takes on his kryptonite in the form of Capt. Shawn Dean. Wardlow will also obviously somehow be there. Security at wrestling shows is a tough ass job.
-Um...we better get a follow-up to the Blackpool Combat Club & Wheeler Yuta situation!! On Rampage, Yuta earned Moxley’s respect and Regal’s handshake, but what does that MEAN?? Did you know this show is free? Incredible.
Tune into AEW on TBS at 8pm ET to see how all this plays out.
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