Cheers to the Champion

SmackDown Women’s Championship

Sasha Banks (c) vs. Carmella

The Boss defends her championship against the self-proclaimed Untouchable One, Carmella. Please note: Some champagne will be harmed during this fight.

The Road to TLC

Since her return, Carmella has had it out for the SmackDown Women’s champion Sasha Banks. After weeks of being blindsided by Carmella with sneaky superkicks and timely taunts, the Champ finally confronted the “untouchable one” by throwing cheap champagne in her face, followed by a punch. Naturally.

After that chaotic confrontation, their feud was transformed from a backstage brawl to a fully-fledged war.

Sasha Banks, cocky, bold, and bossy, as usual, didn’t have much time for Carmella’s prattle, but if she were to set aside her ego for a moment (impossible) and listen to her opponent...well she would probably just have gotten even madder, but the point remains. Carmella made some excellent points.

The crux of Carmella’s grudge is that she’s sick and tired of “the blueprint” acting like she’s the be all end all of the women’s wrestling when little ole Carmella basically wandered into WWE off the street and is just as talented. Sasha may have wanted to be a wrestler since birth, but Carmella tried it on a whim, and ooo how it must get Sasha’s GOAT that Carmella is no slouch in the ring.

And, frankly, Carmella has an excellent point. She’s one of the most improved wrestlers in the entire WWE. She has more than held her own against all of the four horsewomen (I don’t know if you know this, but Carmella has actually beaten Charlotte Flair!) and had one of the most entertaining runs as SmackDown Women’s champion. Anything that has been thrown her way by WWE creative, Carmella has excelled at.

Of course, Sasha isn’t called The Blue Print for nothing. When she says she’s the standard of the women’s division, she ain’t lying.

This feud has quickly become a matter of “sure, you’re good, but damn if I’m not better” for both competitors. So much so that they already had a championship match two weeks ago on SmackDown.

Of course, that ended in a disqualification and shenanigans. Sasha was too violent, and Carmella went full housewives of WWE, smashing a champagne bottle over the champions back.

Just when you thought it couldn’t get more personal, they had to go and waste good champagne.

What’s at stake

Well, that’s kind of a tough one. Obviously, Sasha’s inability to hold main roster solo championships for extended periods of time is always on the forefront of, I presume, her mind as well as ours. If Carmella wins here, then Sasha’s championship reign is once again cut short. Not to mention the ego blow. Sasha is a babyface right now (or as much of a babyface as she ever is), so I’m not totally sure how a big loss + baby face status would work for our champion.

On the other hand, Carmella has just returned from an extended hiatus complete with a new look and new(ish) attitude. If she loses, it basically means that her new identity ain’t up to snuff. Which, is, frankly, a good thing. Carmella is mega-talented - she’s money baby - and she 100% did NOT need this basic bitch makeover for her comeback. It failed with Emmalina. It failed with Lana. It failed with Liv Morgan. (I mean, it worked with Eva Maria, but that’s a whole different article) It’s weird, unnecessary, gross misogynistic nonsense that Vince McMahon shoehorns into the storylines for no reason other than he doesn’t know what else to do with hot blondes.

There are two things that make me unreasonably eye-popping mad about this makeover. If anyone can make it work, it’s Carmella. She’s doing an excellent job (per usual), and the hot blonde bitch attitude works for her. It succeeding here makes me happy for Carmella (more screen time yay!) but mad because it was completely unnecessary. Everything she is doing, and I do mean EVERYTHING, would have worked just as well with the Carmella we knew. Sure, Mella is Money was a fun babyface with neon socks and great dance moves but she was also an A+ sneaky heel that talked a big game, manipulated men, had expensive taste, cut brutal promos, and wrestled better than anyone gave her credit for. There was no need for this makeover.

Either way, this match is going to be worth popping bottles for.