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Lucha Underground’s Ultima Lucha Cuatro, Part Two recap & review: Dario is back!

Ultima Lucha Cuatro is a wrap. The twenty-second episode of season four (Nov. 7, 2018) for Lucha Underground featured coffin beer, a surprise demise of a monster, some bad news (or good news depending on your perspective), life given back to El Jefe, and so much more.

Johnny Mundo & Taya locker room scene

Johnny Mundo was wearing the gauntlet for some major shredding on air guitar.

“This thing is going to look so sweet mounted on the wall of my dojo.” Taya reminded him, “Our dojo.” Johnny continued, “It’s going to look even sweeter though when it’s covered in that stupid turd monster’s blood.” Johnny decided he was going to warm up then felt the power surge. Cue electricity waves in his eyes. On his way out, Johnny said, “If tonight I somehow end up being sacrificed to the gods never to be seen again, just know that I love you.”

After Mundo’s exit, Taya heard a voice. Rosa spoke, “I love you too.” Taya looked over confused at how the doll could talk. Rosa went on, “You’re the perfect woman. AND THE PERFECT HOST!” The second part was in an ugly tone. The camera angle was from behind Taya as she started shaking. I guess the idea was that Rosa’s spirit invaded Taya’s body.

El 43 played us into the Temple. One horn player had major puffy cheek action when blowing.

2 Out of 3 Falls: El Dragon Azteca Jr. vs Fenix

The match began with a slap fight. The pace was quick. Fall 1 lasted a little less than three minutes. The top highlight was a springboard flying crossbody to the outside by El Dragon Azteca Jr. The pin came after a rolling thrust uppercut/slap by Fenix to Azteca on the turnbuckles. Fenix put Azteca on his shoulders for a rotating muscle buster slam maneuver.

“El Dragon Azteca Jr. zero, Fenix one.”

Fenix set up a chair in the ring and a table outside the ring to begin Fall 2. Fenix began with a German suplex. Azteca fought back and landed a DDTJ to pin Fenix. Fall 2 lasted less than two minutes.

“El Dragon Azteca Jr. one, Fenix one.”

Enter Antonio Cueto. He took the match to the next level by making the final fall into falls count anywhere. Fenix responded by smashing Azteca’s head with a chair. Commercial break.

The weary fighters fought hard with chairs and tables until big mouth Melissa Santos got involved. Highlights include a bridging German suplex on the floor by Fenix, a DDTJ by Azteca on the floor, a hurricanrana by Azteca off the medium level fan area rail to send Fenix through a table, and a flying senton by Fenix to Azteca on top of a table.

Near the end, Melissa Santos squawked, “Do something,” to the backup referee as Fenix was in control on the turnbuckle with a table below. Azteca blocked then transitioned into a rolling pin through the table. That was only good for a two count.

Azteca had a chair ready for head smashing when Melissa caught his attention. “You guys are friends. It’s not him.” She was referring to Fenix not being himself since being brought back to life then fast forwarded through time by Aerostar.

At that moment, Fenix grabbed a chair and whacked Azteca in the head. Melissa said, “I’m sorry,” to Azteca. Matt Striker tried to blame Azteca for taking his eyes off his opponent, but Vampiro stepped in to correct him by saying it was Melissa’s fault. It was her fault. She should have kept a zip on her lip.

Fenix speared Azteca through a table in the corner. Fenix finished with a blackbird driver. Fenix made a funny face in victory.

Lucha Underground

A distraught Melissa left without announcing the winner. Fenix didn’t seem to care.

Fenix defeated El Dragon Azteca Jr., 2 falls to 1.

Special guest ring announcer

Since Melissa Santos left the building, Antonio Cueto brought out a surprise. He had been in intense negotiations with a member of a royal family in lucha libre. His blockbuster deal was the signing of Shaul Guerrero, Eddie Guerrero’s daughter.

Shaul began duties for the next match when Famous B interrupted. “From Hollywood, California. One of the most well-known names in all of lucha libre and the only guest ring announcer this place wants to see (I agree), Famous B!” The Believers started in with ‘Git’ chants.

B handed over his 423-GET-FAME business card. “I don’t know who you are or your family, so call this number if you actually want to be famous.” Shaul gave him an ugly-face expression. She listed off the Guerrero family members, talked shit (Famous Bitch), then threw the business card at B. B took of his jacket to make Shaul leave the ring.

In slid Chavo Guerrero from behind. The Guerreros beat up B with a Three Amigos by Shaul and a frog splash by Chavo.

Death Match: Mack vs Mil Muertes

Mil Muertes entered with a coffin that had the match’s name painted in red across the lid. Mil would later drag a second coffin to ringside.

The two brawny men had a nice mix of brawling and move making. Highlights include a DDT on the apron ledge by Mil, a modified X-Factor on top of a coffin by Mil, and a bowling ball splash into the corner by Mack. Vampiro responded to that last maneuver by yelling, “Bru-tal, bru-tal, bru-tal!” That line always cracks a smile out of me.

Mack opened one of the coffins to reveal a variety of weapons; an axe, crowbars, kendo sticks, a steel chain, a hammer, a brick, and some other utensils of destruction.

Mil surprised Mack with a suicide dive. That led to Mil swinging an axe at Mack, and Mack returning serve. There has been some crazy stuff in past matches between these two, but no axe attacks until now. I don’t know how they would have played that off if one connected on purpose.

After a spear by Mil, an ice pick was used to pick Mack’s head. It was more like punches with an ice pick in hand, but the camera was far away enough to not ruin the illusion. Mil was distracted by the referee, so Mack used that opportunity to connect on a spinning heel kick. Mack wrapped his fist with the steel chain to clobber Mil, while yelling, “Kunta Kinte 3000.” That sounds like a new show for El Rey Network to develop.

The next big move was a Coast to Coast trashcan dropkick by Mack. Two count. Later, Mack would rip Mil’s mask. A kendo stick to Mil’s dome followed. Some hefty moves were performed, including a standing backflip splash by Mack.

For the finish, Mil smashed Mack with a Flatliner. Two count. Mack used over 20 elbow strikes to power out of a second Flatliner, but he ran into a goozling. Mil lifted Mack up for a chokeslam, Mack slipped out, then snapped a stunner.

A second stunner and Mil was still on his feet. Mack broke a brick on Mil’s head. Mack finally took Mil off his feet with a third stunner as he shouted, “Go to hell, you motherf-er.” 1, 2, 3.

After the match, Mack rolled Mil into a coffin. Mack cheered with some beers. He even threw one into the coffin for Mil to drink when he comes to. What a nice guy.

Mack defeated Mil Muertes.

Sacrifice to the Gods: Johnny Mundo vs Matanza

Johnny Mundo came to the ring wearing the gauntlet. He actually wrestled parts of the match with it on his hand.

Matanza had a whole new outfit.

To start the match, Mundo grabbed Matanza by the throat and shoved him head over heels into the corner. Matanza dodged a punch then ripped the gauntlet off Mundo’s hand. Mundo tried to go after the glove but ate a pop-up gut slam.

The story was Mundo focused on retrieving the gauntlet with some wrestling maneuvers added for the fight. Highlights include a Torture Rack drop slam by Matanza, Moonlight Drive by Mundo, End of the World by Mundo, and an inside out superplex by Matanza.

Mundo created space by crawling under the ring. He tricked Matanza and escaped to grab the gauntlet. Matanza was on top of Mundo before the gauntlet could be secured. Matanza threw it up above the sliding entrance doors.

The two played cat and mouse around the Temple. Mundo parkoured across an open space, but Matanza snatched him from his goal. Matanza had Mundo up in a powerbomb position. Mundo fought out and conveniently pulled himself up to where the gauntlet lay.

Mundo had the gauntlet in his possession, but Matanza chokeslamed (more like a push-slam) Mundo through the roof. The execution was not so hot.

Matt Striker and Vampiro acted like the match was over and Mundo had been sacrificed. That didn’t make much sense considering all other sacrifices have been in the ring over the center seal. Anyway...

The doors opened and out stepped an unscathed Mundo. He used the gauntlet to punch through a chair. Matanza was on the run back to the ring. Mundo leaped into a Wrath of the Gods by Matanza. Kick out at two.

Power punch to Matanza’s belly. Power punch to the face. Superman power punch. Mundo climbed the turnbuckles to flip off Antonio Cueto with the gauntlet hand. Cueto hissed, “You’re going to die!” A flying power punch finished the fight. Mundo was victorious.

Matanza was not sacrificed. The commercial break hit as Mundo celebrated.

Johnny Mundo defeated Matanza.

Johnny Mundo & Aerostar backstage scene

Johnny Mundo was walking back to the locker room when Aerostar flashed behind him. Aerostar said that they are now even (in reference to Mundo using his wish from Kobra Moon to free Drago) and explained that the gauntlet’s power was destroying Johnny and a god would inhabit his body.

At first, Mundo wasn’t buying it but changed his mind after feeling a power surge. “Nobody inhabits this perfect body but me.” Mundo handed it over to Aerostar. “You’re a good man, Johnny.” “No, I’m not.” Johnny left in search of Taya to celebrate. Wink, wink.

Cero Miedo for the Lucha Underground Championship: Marty Martinez vs Pentagon DARK

The fight began with Pentagon DARK throwing a chair at Marty’s face. Pentagon threw the champ into fan seats and smashed his head against the ring post. Marty was bleeding profusely for the rest of the bout.

More violence. A trashcan shot to Marty’s head. Another toss into fan seats. A hip toss by Marty to send Pentagon through a table. Kendo stick smacks to Pentagon. Marty ate beef jerky from his lunchbox then forked Pentagon in the head. More blood.

More violence. A chair pile thrown atop Pentagon. A direct chair toss to Marty’s head. A Mexican Destroyer by Pentagon after jumping off the announce table. Barbwire bat blows to Pentagon inside a trashcan.

As if shit hadn’t gotten real already, Marty doused Pentagon with gasoline. Marty played to the crowd with his lighter. That allowed Pentagon to attack. A kick knocked the lighter far away. In one of my favorite moments of the evening, Marty grabbed a barbwire bat, swung against the ropes (Pentagon moved), then the bat bounced back and hit him in his own face. That led to a hip toss over the ropes as Marty crashed through a table.

Did I mention there was a random pane of glass? Marty was sent through it.

Pentagon set up a six-pack of chairs for a package piledriver. Success. 1, 2, 3.

New Lucha Underground Champion, Pentagon DARK.

After the match, Pentagon set Marty up for an arm break. Reklusa saved Marty, then Vampiro saved Pentagon by chasing off the spider lady. Vampiro honorably handed over the Lucha Underground championship belt.

Nut kick! Vamp struck. Nut kick back! Pentagon struck. Punch exchange. Kick exchange. Pentagon had the upper hand until a mysterious masked man hit the ring with a chair. Chair shot to Pentagon’s head.

The new dude removed a bony helmet/outer mask to reveal an inner mask similar to Pentagon’s. Vampiro introduced his own master. That led to a shooting star press off the high level and a flying corkscrew splash for good measure.

Strong! Jake Strong entered the area from the stairway. Vampiro and his master skidaddled. Strong cashed in his Gift of the Gods title opportunity. His voice modulated a little to his god tone.

Lucha Underground Championship: Pentagon DARK vs Jake Strong

Jake Strong picked up Pentagon DARK’s leg for an ankle breaker. Pentagon screamed like a muppet. Crunch. Crack. Snap. I’m not sure if Pentagon quit, passed out, or if the referee just called for the bell to protect him.

New Lucha Underground Champion, Jake Strong.

Cliffhanger closing scene

Aerostar, El Dragon Azteca Jr., and King Cuerno met to discuss the gauntlet. Cuerno thinks the gauntlet should go back into hiding. Azteca thinks they should use it to strike now to get an advantage against the gods. Aerostar relents to Azteca. “Make it quick.” “She plans to.” Huh? What? She?

Matanza is pacing in a holding area. A voice says, “I now know El Dragon Azteca didn’t kill my parents. You did.” Black Lotus! And she is wearing the gauntlet. Black Lotus just ripped the heart out of Matanza’s chest.

Azteca appeared over her shoulder to take back the gauntlet. Black Lotus exited, but someone else entered. Strong! Jake Strong kicked Azteca’s ass and broke his ankle. Strong commanded, “That doesn’t belong to you. It belongs to us.” He strongly pounded the gauntlet against his chest.

In the locker room, Johnny Mundo approached a stoic-looking Taya. Mundo was pleased with his performance. “How about we get out of here and finally take that honeymoon of ours? What do you say, Mrs. Mundo?” Taya replied, “Sorry, Johnny. I’m not your wife.” Taya grabbed Johnny by the throat and womanhandled him. Rosa giggles were heard. Taya lifted Johnny off his feet then slammed him to the ground. “I am a god.”

In a limousine sat Agent Winter and Antonio Cueto. Winter stated, “Everything’s coming together just as prophesized.” Vampiro’s master was in the limo too. The descension is complete as all of the gods have taken human form. Vamp’s master said something, but I have no idea what. I couldn’t understand his voice.

Still in the limo, a man in the shadows smoked a cigar. Jake Strong entered with blood on his shirt. Antonio Cueto looked saddened upon hearing it was Matanza’s blood. A voice in Spanish said, “Your son was a worthy host and The Order will never forget his sacrifice.” Transition to English, “But now, we must find a new host.” The dude leaned forward. Wade Barrett!!! “So, anyone else have any bad news? ... Well, I guess it’s time to take over the world.”

One year ago at Dario Cueto’s funeral, Aerostar popped in. He opened the casket lid and placed the Piedra Immortal amulet around Dario’s neck. “Come with me.” Dario’s eyes opened. “Aerostar???” Dario sat up. “What the fu..???”

Lucha Underground

To be continued...

Betcha by golly, wow. Part Two of Ultima Lucha Cuatro was full of wonder and surprise. Color me satisfied with that show as a finale to season four. Unpredictable outcomes, relatively clean finishes, swerves, new characters appearing, old characters returning, and the cinematic scenes all being super delicious. Yum!

The wrestling was more entertainment than sport. I guess that was to be expected with the match types. Three of the four were feel-good winners. That is always nice.

Fenix vs El Dragon Azteca Jr. was the closest to a genuine lucha libre match out of the four advertised bouts. The first two falls were too quick though. Mack vs Mil Muertes had plenty of intense action. Johnny Mundo actually made the gauntlet work in the ring. That was a pleasant surprise. The Cero Miedo match with Pentagon DARK against Marty Martinez was what it was. You either enjoy extreme hardcore or you don’t. I am pleased as punch that no thumbtacks were used. I don’t have much else to say about the matches themselves, so let’s tackle the story points.

Taya. Rosa. Johnny. Oh, my. That was a major twist by having Rosa inhabit Taya’s body. I guess there will be no slamming in Slamtown during the offseason. Will the Mundos ever have peace as a married couple? Ever since I saw the trailer, I thought it was Rosa choking the life out of Taya. I never considered that Rosa was a god. Evil Taya will be an intriguing character in and out of the ring for season five.

I’m so over the Melissa Santos character. I love her as a ring announcer, but I’m growing to hate her as an important personality. Her random shouts for help are extremely annoying. I understand the story of her believing Fenix’s soul could still be there, but I can’t get over the idea that she hasn’t tried to do anything about it for the past three weeks. And now she cares so deeply? Not to mention, she cost El Dragon Azteca Jr. the match. Boo!

The segment with Shaul Guerrero was tons of fun, but that was mostly due to Famous B and Chavo Jr. I thought the actual surprise reveal was a dud. Nothing against Shaul, but she does not fit what Antonio was hyping to. She is lucha libre royalty in name only and is not blockbuster. Heck, I would have been more excited for an appearance by Vickie Guerrero. It will be interesting to see if Shaul ends up as a luchadora in season five.

Why wasn’t Matanza sacrificed? I thought a sacrifice was supposed to be the point of the match. A one-way stipulation is kind of lame. In theory, Matanza could continue to stalk Johnny Mundo. Matanza should have been taken to Sacrificetown. I’ll overlook it since Matanza’s eventual demise was super awesome. Also, why did Matt Striker and Vampiro think Johnny was sacrificed after crashing through the roof? That’s not how any of the sacrifices worked in the past.

The only spoiler I accidentally discovered this season was Jake Strong leaving as Lucha Underground Champion. I didn’t know the details, but it became pretty obvious once Strong won the Gift of the Gods title. For that reason, I had zero emotion when Pentagon DARK beat Marty Martinez. I’m okay with Strong as champ, since he has god power. That story element makes a world of difference.

The Gift of the Gods belt must have the one week rule reinstated. That is now two straight Ultima Lucha events with ‘bullshit’ finishes. If they keep the anytime cash-in, then there will always be a cloud over the main event. The focus will be waiting for the potential aftermath rather than the main event match itself.

It wouldn’t be Ultima Lucha without Vampiro/Pentagon shenanigans. I’m fairly certain that Vamp’s master is AAA’s Australian Suicide. I recognized him by his lip rings. He’s pretty cool in the ring. I thought the master at Ultima Lucha Tres was more muscly, so his stature was underwhelming in this episode. At least, Australian Suicide will be a good wrestling choice.

The final super-scene was dynamite. I loved Black Lotus showing up to dispose of Matanza. The manner in how she did it was awesome. Nothing like ripping a heart out of someone’s body to quench the thirst of revenge.

Oh, hello. Nice seeing you, Wade. That was a major shock in a positive way. Seeing all those goons in the limo was a funny visual. I can’t wait to see them try to take over the world.

So, will there be seven gods? I figure seven to match the number of ancient Aztec tribes. There is Wade Barrett, Jake Strong, Vampiro’s master, Taya, the gauntlet, and someone to replace Matanza. That is six. Am I missing one? I guess a seventh could be someone new, who was already in human form off-screen.

Fantasy team time. If I could pick seven luchadores to fight the gods, I would go with Mil Muertes, Dante Fox, Johnny Mundo, Mack, Daga, Aerostar, and King Cuerno. I know that doesn’t fit the story, but those would be my choices if I were captain. Death, a soldier, a musician, a beer drinker, a dagger, a time-traveler, and a hunter.

Dario!!!!!!! I hoped so hard that he would be back. His line of a bewildered, “What the fu..?” was perfect. The delivery was prime Dario and the cut off halfway through the F word was classic. The idea of Dario saving the world will take the show to another level. Hero Dario is going to be so fun to root for.

Which was your favorite match from Part Two of Ultima Lucha Cuatro? Favorite moment? What did you think of the closing scene? Was there anybody you wanted an appearance from? Who would be on your squad to fight the gods? Dario! Dario! Dario!

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