Impact Wrestling results, review, & video (May 11, 2017): Oversaturation

Impact Wrestling returned last night (May 11) from Orlando, Florida with their fourth show from the last set of tapings. You can find the results in the live blog here.

Oversaturation

The main event tonight was a Global Force title match between Alberto El Patron and champion Magnus. After a long bout, Patron ended up submitting Magnus with the cross armbreaker.

It wasn’t a bad match. In fact, it was pretty good for a television main event. But man, it is tough to give a damn about that GFW title.

Since Impact absorbed all of the GFW titles, we have a ton of belts floating around and no reason to care about them. In fact, the Impact titles we cared about prior mean less now because of the over saturation of gold. I mean if you work for Impact and don’t have some sort of title at this point, you’re doing something wrong.

Because of that, the weight they wanted for this match wasn’t there. The show opened with a video package building this match and it was mentioned here and there throughout the broadcast. But I still found myself asking “Why do I care?” while watching this bout.

I mentioned it last week but it’s likely going to be a consistent criticism until they sort this all out. There is just no reason to care about the GFW titles and because of that, all the stories that depend on the title for it’s impact are lacking.

That’s what happened tonight. The match was enjoyable. But Alberto holding up the GFW gold resonated very little.

Full Heel Turn

When EC3 turned heel, I wondered if there would be an issue getting people to boo him. His cavalier attitude, supreme arrogance, and sliver tongue when he was a heel the first time around is what made him a fan favorite to begin with. Tonight, they took measures to get people to dislike him as much as possible.

He came out dressed as a Cowboy, mocking James Storm, and cut a promo. Carter used a ridiculous cowboy accent and then sang “Friends in Low Places” with his own lyrics. While Carter is usually great on the microphone, this didn’t seem to work. Not that I’m supposed to love him. He’s a heel. But the crowd didn’t seem to make noise either way leaving the whole promo feeling empty.

However, it was awkward enough that the sound of James Storm’s music was a relief. Storm slid into the back of the ring and went after Carter. Unfortunately for the Cowboy, the tide would turn.

EC3 used his cowboy boot to hit Storm in the skull. Ethan used this moment to handcuff his adversary to the ropes, rip off his shirt, and whip the defenseless Storm with his leather belt. Then when security finally came out to stop him, Carter knocked one of them down and whipped one of them.

While the segment wasn’t perfect, it accomplished painting Carter as a nasty heel. The dumb Cowboy promo was just awkward. But handcuffing Storm and whipping him when he had no way to defend himself is an action that you instinctively want to boo (unless you really hate James Storm). Attacking the security man with the belt just drove the point home. Carter isn’t just a clever heel with a silver tongue. He’s a nasty SOB.

Coming out of this, I want to see Storm get some revenge. That’s a step up from where I was, not really caring about this feud.

New Tag Challengers

LAX held their funeral for Decay last night. Wearing white and black face paint the stable walked to the ring with two urns, representing Crazzy Steve and Abyss. Konnan pretended to be respectful at first, but then predictably changed his tune. He accused Impact for sending their best team (Decay) to destroy them but that just led to a clown in a coma and Abyss eating from a feeding tube.

He accused Impact for being like this country, full of empty promises and exploitation.

That was all really good. The black and white face paint added to the funeral ceremony set for Decay. And Konnan’s message that the man can try to keep them down but it’s not possible was strong. But then it got corny.

There was a dude in the crowd randomly waiving the American flag which upset Konnan. He yelled at the man and eventually palmed his face. This led to the team Veterans of War coming out, brawling with LAX, and clearing them from the ring.

The random dude in the crowd was super cheesy and completely changed the tone of this. The lead up to this was intriguing, with the dark vibe of the funeral march and Konnan’s promo. But then here’s some random dude waving a flag in the crowd. No one ever waves a full flag at a wrestling show. Sure there are people who bring a flag and will hold it up, but never on a pole. That just felt out of place.

It was meant to tie Konnan’s jab about the country to LAX’s future feud with the Veterans of War. The transition just wasn’t smooth at all. We’ve only seen VOW as a team once so time will tell how this story plays.

Blood Feud

Alisha Edwards faced Angelina Love last night. Both of their husbands were in their corners, Eddie Edwards on crutches after last week’s attack.

The match started with a brawl that spilled outside, where Alisha was able to take it to Angelina. However back in the ring, Love hit a spear and started ruthlessly unloading on Alisha. Edwards was able to deliver a double underhooked DDT, leading to Davey beginning to step into the ring. Alisha kicked the rope between Davey’s leg as he stepped over, but while this was happening, Angelina wrapped a chain around her fist and knocked Alisha in the back of the head with it. The referee saw this and called for the bell.

But Angelina didn’t care. She kept laying in those chain shots until Eddie limped in to stop her. She slapped Eddie twice and went for a third when he caught her hand. However, Davey used Eddie’s own crutch to attack his bad leg. To continue the assault, Angelina held down Eddie’s leg down as Davey delivered another shot with the crutch.

These four have done a great job making this feel like a true blood feud. Angelina Love has been really great at being utterly despicable. It’s been a fun rivalry and I look forward to the payoff match.

More titles???

We learned tonight that there will be a tournament to crown new GFW tag team champions.

Wait... what?

For some reason, instead of consolidating titles because there are way too many of them, they’re adding another. I don’t get it.

I assumed that when GFW and Impact merged, Impact would acquire the roster and they’d merge all the titles. But if they were planning on merging the titles, why would they ever fill the vacant GFW tag championships?

GFW shouldn’t exist any more. It’s no longer its own promotion. So all of its titles should be retired. Instead they’re making sure they’re all currently represented.

After this tournament was announced, Garza Jr. and Laredo Kid won a tag match again Hakim Zane and Idris Abraham.

All the Rest

Everyone hates Moose

Moose picked up a rather dominant Grand Championship win over Marshe Rockett, winning by pinfall early in the second round.

After the match, he was attacked by Eli Drake and Tyrus. But Moose’s poor fortunes continued. After they were done, Chris Adonis came down to pick the bones, applying a Adonis Lock to the big man. Drake returned with a chair, stared down Adonis, and then used the steel on the champion.

This is interesting in that we don’t know how both Adonis and Drake/Tyrus will factor into Moose’s future.

X Division

Impact opened with an X Division match between Matt Sydal, Dezmond Xavier, Caleb Konley, and Andrew Everett. It was a match that was non-stop, never taking a minute to breathe. It ended with Andrew Everett picking up a pinfall win on Xavier.

These matches are a fun way to kick off the show given the fact they are all in your face until the end. There isn’t much substance to them but they are fun. When it comes time to tell a real story with the X Division (and hopefully they plan on doing that), I would want them to run a one on one match that takes a moment or two to breathe and tell a story. But for an opening match, it’s fun to watch Dezmond Xavier go wild.

Laurel and her man

Laurel Van Ness wrestled tonight, defeating Ava Storie. She still wore her wedding dress and acted crazy like she had been. After the match, she kept attacking Storie. When referee Earl Hebner tried to pull her off, Kong ran into the ring, forcing Hebner to flee.

Nothing here is working for me. I dug the Laurel Van Ness crazy jilted bride bit at first, but that was over two months ago. The wedding itself was in February! They haven’t done anything to add anything to that story and instead just have had her out there with the wedding dress for months. The time has passed to capitalize on the wedding angle. It’s time to move on.

Also, the wedding had a different feel because that was an entirely different creative team. Without the same vibe, it’s not working.

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Pros of the Show:

• The Wolves continue to build a strong blood feud
• They did a good job making us hate EC3
• Main event was a solid match

Cons of the Show:

• There’s no reason to care about the GFW titles
• The LAX segment ended up going from fun to lame quickly
• The Laurel Van Ness bit just isn’t doing it

It wasn’t an offensively bad show or anything. But there was nothing really standout on this episode. The overload of titles and title matches weakens the meaning of all of them and the product in general though.

Grade: C

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