This one is painful for me.
If you don’t follow the backstories of your favorite wrestling bloggers - or even me - you might not know I was raised in Pittsburgh. Most of my family still lives in Western Pennsylvania. There are a few things it’s hard to avoid when you’re from The ‘Burgh, and while I do not use “yinz” as second-person plural pronoun, I am a Steelers fan. To the extent my wife and many of our friends don’t know why I follow the team, because losses and even setbacks within games cause me great emotional distress.
Knowing that, and that I like thinking and discussing pro wrestling so much I made it my job, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that I would describe one of the big NFL stories of the past week using wrestling terms and analogies. James Harrison, one of the heroes of Pittsburgh’s last Super Bowl win and as prototypical a Steeler as you’ll find, is now a member of the New England Patriots - the team who beat the Steelers in the AFC championship game last January (and two other times this century).
The defending Super Bowl champs also defeated Pittsburgh in an epic game a couple weeks ago which could be described as having a Dusty Finish… but I don’t want to go overboard on the graps comps.
So the Pats are Stone Cold Steve Austin or Hiroshi Tanahashi, and the Steelers are The Rock or Kazuchika Okada… except WrestleMania 19 or Wrestle Kingdom 10 haven’t happened.
Harrison is 39 years old and barely played for Pittsburgh this year, so their releasing him last week was a big deal in terms of his legacy with the team, but it wasn’t supposed to be a big deal in terms of what would happen on the field for the rest of this season. Until he signed with New England. Then, just like the wrestling feud this is, all hell broke loose.
I immediately thought of it as a heel turn, with “Why, Deebo (Harrison’s Friday-inspired nickname), why?” running through my brain. Turns out I wasn’t alone.
Pittsburgh-based website/meme generator Benstonium made the connection with this photoshopped take on a famous Attitude Era D-X scene starring Harrison as Mike Tyson, Patriots quarterback Tom Brady as Shawn Michaels, Triple H as someone who will be familiar to non-football fans, Mojo Rawley’s pal Rob Gronkowski, and Steelers coach Mike Tomlin as Vince McMahon:
It makes me laugh and cry at the same time. Although Gronk/Haitch never fails to help me find my smile. Damnit.
Then, Steelers’ defensive end Cameron Heyward, one of the team leaders, was on NFL Network’s Good Morning Football and described the Pats’ new linebacker signing, well…
“It was definitely a heel turn move.
It's almost like Hulk Hogan when he went to the nWo, nobody's happy about that. But it's his decision. It just means he won't be in the ring with us.”
There’s a lot more, but I want to stick to the more overt similarities and mentions. If you want to really explore this feud, head over to our SBNation sister sites for the teams - Behind The Steel Curtain and Pats Pulpit - for more insults, shade and drama.
Football probably isn’t scripted (I’m kidding about the “probably”… I think). There’s no guarantee the Steelers will play the Patriots in the playoffs, or that Harrison will have any impact on the game if they do.
But I kind of feel like it’s inevitable, and not just because I’m an over-invested Pittsburgh fan who loses sleep worrying we’ll never beat New England. No, I believe Deebo will line up Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger for a meaningful, game-changing sack in the AFC Championship game on Sunday, Jan. 21 because…
Everything is pro wrestling.