Royal Rumble 1994 Dumbest Ass Award: Lex Luger

The Royal Rumble match is a 30 man over the top rope battle royal, and it's every man for himself. That invites strategy. It's a tactical war as much as a test of physical strength and endurance. Too often, wrestlers either forget this fact or ignore it completely. They do so by engaging in such ridiculously dumb behavior like outright stopping eliminations from occurring. There are exceptions, of course, like tag teams or factions attempting to work together to give themselves the best chance to win but generally, it's a really stupid idea to stop an elimination.

In each Royal Rumble, there are always wrestlers who stop multiple eliminations. In some cases, a wrestler will stop an elimination that has a monumental effect on the match and is detrimental to his chances of winning in a way he ultimately cannot overcome. I like to refer to such a wrestler as the "Dumbest Ass."

Here, we'll hand out the award for "Dumbest Ass" in each of the Royal Rumble matches that have taken place so far.

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1994

The only time two wrestlers won the same Royal Rumble match. But it never would have gone down that way if one of those two wasn't a huge dumbass.

Dumbasses

Rick Steiner

1. Samu was trying to throw Scott Steiner out when Rick, as entrant 3, came to his brother's aid. This is one of the more forgivable dumbass moments because it's so early in the match and the strategy of teaming up with a partner -- and in this case, brother -- to survive deep into it before going after each other is actually tactically sound. Sure enough, they eliminated Samu and then didn't engage each other while waiting for the next entrant.

Owen Hart

1. Immediately after eliminating Rick Steiner, Owen turned around to see Scott working on taking Kwang out. Instead of helping him, he back shotted him. Dumb.

Bart Gunn

1. Upon entering at number 6 and seeing both Owen Hart and Kwang trying to toss Scott Steiner, he went after Hart. There was a lot of dumb to go around early on.

Scott Steiner

1. He was engaged with Kwang, looked up and saw Owen Hart trying to eliminate Bart Gunn, and broke off to go stop it. I mean, I guess Gunn helped him out earlier.
2. It seemed clear that was the case with his next dumbass move. This time he was engaged with Hart and saw Kwang trying to toss Gunn and straight up hauled ass across the ring to stop him. But nope! After Diesel got in and started chucking people around, Steiner took Kwang's place in trying to send Gunn out. I would really like to know what was in his head during this decision making process. I imagine it was just rocks getting kicked around.

Diesel

1. I mentioned Scott Steiner taking Kwang's place trying to eliminate a guy he kept saving, Bart Gunn. Well, Diesel saw this, punched Steiner in the head, and walked off. My god, the early part of this Royal Rumble was filled with dipshits. His saving grace was that he ended up eliminating literally everyone in the ring right after this.

Jeff Jarrett

1. My god, what an idiot. Diesel had thrown out like seven guys in a row and was doing it fast enough to give himself a few seconds to rest in between entrants. Finally, Macho Man Randy Savage came out and was getting the better of the big man. But as he was going to eliminate him, Jarrett's dumbass ran in and jumped him. Keep in mind, Savage had made the stupidest mistake in history the year before and nearly did the same the year before that. Macho Man was really bad in Royal Rumble matches. Yet here he is trying to toss a straight up killer and Jarrett stops him, and then puts a sustained beating on him while allowing Diesel to rest up in the corner. Just a complete moron. The best part? He tried to toss Savage, failed, turned around to finally go after Diesel, and was thrown out by Savage anyway.

Randy Savage

1. As stated, Savage was bad in Royal Rumble matches, mainly because he never planned a damn thing beyond "hit people" and the one time he did extra planning it was "hit people, specifically Jake Roberts". He didn't stop an elimination here, but he screwed himself over once again with poor strategy. He had been working on Diesel for some time when Crush came into the match. Instead of attempting to team with him to take the biggest threat in the match out, he just started bludgeoning Crush. He beat the shit out of that man, allowing Diesel to rest up again until he was ready to get involved once more. When he was, he beat Savage up, Crush, of course, helped him and ultimately it was Crush who unceremoniously dumped Macho Man out.

Crush

1. I can't believe some of the moronic moves in this match. Diesel and Crush were beating poor Doink the Clown to death when Bam Bam Bigelow entered. He had a history with Doink, so they held the ring ropes open for him and backed off while he picked Doink up and chucked him. But it was a trap! They immediately pounced and tried sending Bigelow out. But while they were in the process of doing so, Crush, apparently because there's nothing but air in his head, broke off and punched Diesel.
2. Mo, fresh into the match, had Shawn Michaels in a bad spot but it mattered not because Crush was there to kick him in the gut for no good reason whatsoever.
3. Greg Valentine was being a complete idiot, as you'll read a bit later, but he was at least trying to toss Sparky Plugg when Crush gave him the ol' kidney shot.
4. Bam Bam Bigelow had Tatanka up on his back when Crush walked over and threw a punch. To be fair, Bam Bam's elimination attempt was weaksauce. Still, this was dumb. Even better, Greg Valentine punched Crush in the back before just leaving and Crush also just left and stood around in the middle of the ring for like 25 seconds.

Bam Bam Bigelow

1. Sparky Plugg had just gotten in the ring and was about to put Crush up and over when Bam Bam punched him and took off. I don't get it.
2. Lex Luger was trying to get Crush out and had him halfway there when Bam Bam comes strolling up and punches Luger in the back. He hits one shot, and Luger doesn't move. He goes all double axe handle and hits a second shot and Luger doesn't move. So he decides to try to help Lex send Crush out. Why on Earth wouldn't you just do that to begin with? Because you're a dumbass.

Mo

1. This is some kind of stupid. Mo walks over to Mabel, who is working on Sparky Plugg, and instead of helping him peels off to go stop a fresh Greg Valentine from getting Bam Bam Bigelow gone. This is true dumbass work. That's making it an artform.
2. I don't even... Just... What the hell. Tantaka has Shawn Michaels just about over and out when Mo makes his way over, bends all the way over the top rope to grab Shawn's hair, doens't get a good grip, gets frustrated, stands back up, and punches Tatanka.

Greg Valentine

1. This was really something. Mo was teaming up with Sparky Plugg in an effort to get Shawn Michaels out. Valentine walks up and starts trying to throw Plugg out but inexplicably elbows Mo in the head and takes over trying to get Michaels out. What?!? Then he stops and goes back to Plugg! You dunce. Ultimately, no one was eliminated.
2. So Bret Hart gets in at number 27. He limps his way to the ring because he had injured his leg in a tag match earlier in the night. As soon as he got in, Crush went to work on said knee. A surprisingly smart play considering how much of a dumbass Crush was in this match. Genichiro Tenryu comes over to help out and it looks like Hart is in big trouble right away. But no, Valentine does a drive by punch and ends all that.

Lex Luger

1. This is unforgivable. Crush, after spending time working over Bret Hart's injured leg, has him up over his head and is walking to the ropes, getting ready to toss him out. Luger sees this and runs all the way across the ring to stop it from happening.
2. Let me just transcribe Vince McMahon's commentary here: "And The Hitman is almost out. Well, wait a minute. Lex Luger went to work on Shawn Michaels, who has been in for over 25 minutes. Michaels almost had Bret Hart out and Lex Luger came over and attacked Michaels." That's two saves of Bret Hart.

Bret Hart

1. While Shawn Michaels was trying to toss Marty Jannetty, Bret sauntered over and started working on Shawn's back. Weird call.

Adam Bomb

1. Bret Hart and Tatanka were teaming up to take Shawn Michaels out but Adam Bomb wasn't having that, and ripped Tatanka away.

The Dumbest Ass

Lex Luger

Honorable mention to guys like Crush, Greg Valentine, and Jeff Jarrett for being huge dumbasses throughout their time in this match but Luger takes the cake, which is amazing considering he won the damn thing. That's just it, though: He was a co-winner with Bret Hart. That's the same Bret Hart he saved from elimination not once but twice. He would have had the glory all for himself if he wasn't such a dumbass. It's enough to make him The Dumbest Ass.

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Previous "Dumbest Ass" award winners:

1989: Bad News Brown
1990: Ultimate Warrior
1991: British Bulldog
1992: Hulk Hogan
1993: Randy Savage