The Royal Rumble match is a 30 man over the top rope battle royal, and it's every man for himself. That invites strategy. It's a tactical war as much as a test of physical strength and endurance. Too often, wrestlers either forget this fact or ignore it completely. They do so by engaging in such ridiculously dumb behavior like outright stopping eliminations from occurring. There are exceptions, of course, like tag teams or factions attempting to work together to give themselves the best chance to win but generally, it's a really stupid idea to stop an elimination.
In each Royal Rumble, there are always wrestlers who stop multiple eliminations. In some cases, a wrestler will stop an elimination that has a monumental effect on the match and is detrimental to his chances of winning in a way he ultimately cannot overcome. I like to refer to such a wrestler as the "Dumbest Ass." Special considerations made for other stupidity.
Here, we'll hand out the award for "Dumbest Ass" in each of the Royal Rumble matches that have taken place so far.
The biggest dog in the yard is also the dumbest, if only for one Royal Rumble.
He's over in the corner recovering from a Samoan drop from Rikishi when Goldust comes over and climbs up on the second rope to deliver punches. A bad play from Goldie, and one that should have gotten him eliminated. But when Bradshaw picked him up, instead of throwing him back and out of the ring, he just threw him down to the mat right in front of him.
What cha up to here, Billy?
- He literally held Bradshaw in instead of eliminating him so they could have a conversation and he was terrible at concealing that fact. What's funny is Goldust came over to get after him (not including this as a Dumbass moment for Goldie because, as noted, Gunn wasn't actually trying to eliminate anyone) and Bradshaw ended up attacking Goldust. He then tossed him over the top but while he was doing so, Gunn came up from behind and threw him out. What a strange, pointless sequence.
- In the interest of running wild, I guess, he got in the ring and went after Al Snow while he was teaming with Rikishi trying to eliminate Goldust. 'Taker tossed Goldust after everyone else bailed off, because of him, but it's still a bad play on his part.
- This is ... weird. Undertaker throws literally everyone in the ring out and is left waiting for the next entrant. That entrant ends up being Matt Hardy, who has his then girlfriend, Lita, come down to the ring with him. The Deadman is setting up to choke slam Hardy when Lita hops up on the top rope and goes for the flying nothing. Undertaker catches her by the throat and suddenly he has the couple both ready for a choke slam. Then he makes a bad decision: He tosses Matt into the turnbuckles and turns all his attention to Lita, his hand still firmly around her throat. He stares down at her saying something but leaves his legs wide open and she kicks him square in the dick. Not only was this bad, it was really dumb.
- He got Matt Hardy up for the Last Ride and actually completed it. The Last Ride requires putting Hardy up over his head. Slamming him down instead of throwing him out is a cardinal sin in a Royal Rumble. He did eliminate him right after.
- Oh, the great Maven moment. Undertaker had tossed out both the Hardy Boyz and they wanted revenge so they rushed the ring and attacked him. He disposed of them easily but after doing so, stood over the ropes pointing at them and screaming to get out of his ring. You already threw them out of it, guy! Maven took advantage of this and dropkicked him out, eliminating him.
Scotty 2 Hotty
- He hits Dallas Page, who goes flying through the ropes to the outside, meaning he's not eliminated. Back in the ring with only Christian, Scotty sets up for The Worm, the dumbest move this side of The People's Elbow. After he completes it, he starts celebrating. I have no idea what he's so happy about, considering Christian is still in the ring and he's done nothing of note here. As he's celebrating, Page gets back in the ring and eliminates him from behind. You gotta keep your head on a swivel when you find yourself in a Royal Rumble.
- First of all, he wore spotted trunks. Ring attire is an undervalued consideration in a Royal Rumble. Don't wear anything that calls attention to yourself and all that. Anyway, he was helping Christian to eliminate Chuck when he broke off to blast Christian. Then he suplexed Chuck. Damn, Saturn's dumb.
Stone Cold Steve Austin
- This was actually a really fun thing he did but that doesn't mean it wasn't really dumb. He came in at number 19 and tossed everyone out of the ring. Instead of hanging out and waiting for the next entrant, the Texas Rattlesnake went all Texas Dumbasssnake, going out of the ring to bring Christian and Chuck back in just to hit 'em with a Stunner and toss 'em out a second time. Fun, but a waste of energy.
- Kurt Angle is close to getting Triple H out when Austin peels off his encounter with Mr. Perfect to run over to stop him. "What is that about?" asks Jerry Lawler, a valid question we have no answer for. Not a good one, at least.
This dipshit forgot who he was for a minute.
He was immediately tossed out.
- Big Show has Kurt Angle up over his head and starts moving towards the ropes like he's going to throw him out. He never gets the chance, however, because The Game forgets how to play it and kicks Show's leg out from under him. What a stupid decision.
- My god, this idiot. He gets in at number 30 and sees three guys laid out while Steve Austin and Triple H are fighting in the corner. He picks Rob Van Dam up and throws him out, which is good, but immediately follows up by doing a spinaroonie, which is bad. Keep in mind there were two guys, Kurt Angle and Mr. Perfect, still laid out at this point. Naturally, Austin broke away from Triple H to hit him with a Stunner and that was enough to get him over the top rope and out.
The Dumbest Ass
He was really bad in this match. He chose to go after someone who wasn't even in the match over someone who was and then left himself open to a dick kick while taking his sweet time doing whatever he was going to do to said person who, again, wasn't even in the match. His worst infraction, though, was standing near the ropes screaming at the Hardy Boyz to get out of his ring after he himself had literally just thrown them out of that very ring. This man allowed a woman he had in a choke hold and a Tough Enough winner to get the drop on him. This is made all the worse by the fact that he's a big man.
Previous "Dumbest Ass" award winners:
1989: Bad News Brown
1990: Ultimate Warrior
1991: British Bulldog
1992: Hulk Hogan
1993: Randy Savage
1994: Lex Luger
1995: Lex Luger
1997: Mil Mascaras
1998: Disciples of Apocalypse
1999: Stone Cold Steve Austin
2000: Big Show
2001: The Rock