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New Day starts online petition to #SaveTheTables from 'camouflaged menace' The Dudleyz

Xavier Woods on Twitter

Well, that didn't take long. Here's Big E, Kofi Kingston & Xavier Woods being awesome...again.

Go sign their petition to protect tables from the men they'll be facing at Night of Champions on Sunday for the tag titles, The Dudley Boyz:

Some of life's most memorable moments are spent with a table. Think of the family dinners, board game nights, and the hanky panky you and your significant other enjoy when you have the house to yourself. All enjoyed on or around a table!

We, The New Day, are here to alert you to the rise of a camouflaged menace, a filthy scourge, a lingering and powerful blight that should have been eradicated a decade ago, that threatens to mutilate & poach every table in existence. This plague refers to itself as The Dudley Boyz. These Boyz have been destroying tables, obliterating good wood, and spitting in the face of Mother Nature for years so it is time that we took a stand. Please sign this petition to ensure that our future generations don't have to first learn about tables in history textbooks. Keep tables from going the way of the dodo bird. Keep them from going extinct.

And if this petition gains enough support, we're pretty sure we can get the Dudley Boyz fired or tarred and feathered. Something really humiliating. Only you can prevent table violence.


In a little more than an hour, they're more than halfway toward their intial goal of 1,000 signatures.

And what's more, they're trying to enlist some powerful allies in the fight to protect good wood and/or tar and feather Bubba Ray & D-Von:

I give up. From here on out, cSs will just re-publish the social media accounts of The New Day.

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