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Cageside Countdown: The Best of Summerslam 2015

Summerslam 2015 has come and gone. We'll remember it maybe, but mostly will complain and lament about the show not reaching its full potential. And we should. Maybe the WWE had a plan of backing into a great show, but unlike Wrestlemania 31, the show we got was in direct promotion to the build we got for it. Good in some spots, spotty in others. That said, the second biggest night on the WWE calendar produced some good moments. Or at least memorable ones. We salute those moments for this week's Cageside Countdown...

The top ten moments of Summerslam 2015.

(Warning: this is a GIF-heavy post.)

(as voted by you, the Cagesiders)

But before we get to the list, I have to at least make a mention of the show that happened the night before, NXT Takeover: Brooklyn. On the strength of one match, it's a contender for best show of 2015. Don't look at me like that. You know I'm right. Of course, I'm talking about Sasha Banks versus Bayley for the NXT Womens Championship.

You may remember that match. It had this in it.

And then after a hard-fought match, it ended with this.

And it was awesome as hell. That's easily the best part of the weekend, and there isn't a close second. Don't fight me on this.

Takeover: Brooklyn is absolutely worth your time, and after you're done reading this, you should watch it again. I don't care if you saw it like six times already. Go watch it again.

Now that I've gotten in my thought or three about Takeover: No Sleep, here they are... for real this time...

The top ten moments of Summerslam 2015.

(as voted by you, the Cagesiders. If your favorite didn't win, that's your fault. On with it.)


Urban Dictionary definition of BRIE MODE: When a girl enters the drunkin state of mind. WWE definition of BRIE MODE: Brie Bella hulking up. Summerslam 2015 definition of BRIE MODE: hilariously missing a missile dropkick so that Becky Lynch can take you to Suplex City, bitch.

9. Jon Stewart's "face turn"

From Daily Show host to Summerslam criminal, they say. From Daily Show host to Summerslam icon, I say. Okay, maybe not icon, but the comedian's use of a steel chair on John Cena prevented Seth Rollins from going down as one of the biggest busts as WWE Champion ever. Was it stunning? Yeah, considering the guy basically ripped Seth a new one earlier this year. But it does follow a pattern: at Wrestlemania XXVII, celebrity host The Rock cost John Cena the WWE Championship, so JERN (or is it JAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHNNNNNNN) probably should have seen this coming.

The next night, Jon justified his reactions for all of us, saying he did not want to see JERN get #16. Then he got AA'd by that heel punk Cena, but that's another story. Look, John's sixteen, seventeenth, and maybe even 25th world titles are inevitable. Anything that can be done to delay the inevitable is welcome in my book. And probably yours too.

8. Big E corners the market on tricep meat.

Seriously, have you seen Big E Langston's triceps? If you haven't, Xavier Woods took the time to remind you that Big E Langston's triceps are huge.


7. The Spanish announce table survives.

Come on: who had the Spanish table going down at Summerslam? Everybody, right? Well, if you put money on it (and I'm sure someone did), you lost. Because it was the French announce table that ate the F-5 from Brock Lesnar. And as the Deadman found out, the French table is just as painful as its Spanish and English counterparts.

6. Seth Rollins superplex/falcon arrow combo.

Ok, I think we all realize that Seth Rollins is pretty good at this thing called pro wrestling. He's pretty smooth in the ring. Case in point, this little ditty he whipped out near the end of the match: a superplex, immediately floating over into a falcon arrow. That's a pretty awesome sequence. And a better finisher than the Pedigree. Yeah, I said it. Hell, he can just do the falcon arrow as a finisher and not be Triple H Junior. Just a thought.

5. Arrow takes bumps.

The history of wrestling has far too many examples of celebrities looking incompetent in the ring. In their defense, wrestling's not their primary line of work, but given a few hours, a good promoter can make them look good using some smoke and mirrors. (See what I did there?)

Stephen Amell, however it was made possible, looked like he'd been wrestling for years during the tag team bout straight out of a comic book.  Could he drop into say, NXT, and win their title outright? Probably not, but then most people can't. The thing was this: he looked damn confident in what he was doing, bumping like a boss. Probably the best in-ring outing by a celebrity in a long time.


Why do you need words when you can just watch for yourself?

3. Brock Lesnar flips off the Undertaker.

So... Brock-Undertaker 2015 was better than Brock-Undertaker 2014, right? I mean, we're pretty much in agreement on that? Hey, Undertaker (as far as I know) didn't get concussed, so that alone makes it better by default. So there.

Anyways, fast forward to the end of the match, when Brock Lesnar has the Deadman in the kimura lock. Brock, not mindful of his shoulders for a moment, nearly gets counted down, but when Brock gets a shoulder up, Undertaker taps. Unfortunately for Brock, not in view of the referee. But in view of the timekeeper, who rings the bell. (Turns out said timekeeper is SHOCKMASTER'S SON.) Then, ding! Undertaker roshambos Lesnar—again—and locks in Hells Gate. But Brock would not go gently into that good night. So on his way to an unexpected nap, Brock made sure to make his feelings pretty clear about Undertaker. He was indeed #1. And now Undertaker is the 1 in 1-1. Or something. Basically, Undertaker became the first man to pin or submit Brock in more than three years.

2. Undertaker and Lesnar have a laugh.

The Undertaker zombie sit-up spot is one of the most iconic spots in wrestling history. Just as you think you have the phenom down, he resurrects himself. It's a central part of his character (well, except in the biker Taker years, but that's a different story). The sit-up reached memetastic levels at last year's Summerslam when Brock Lesnar mocked the Deadman's situp during his bout with John Cena.

So of course Brock thought to do it again with The Deadman lying opposite of him. I mean, what better way to rub in 21-1 than that situp, right? Except The Undertaker sat up right after that, and the Undertaker laughed and made weird faces and it got all creepy. Something tells me backstage the two had a major laugh about it.

1. New Day flips out.

Ok, I admit it. I've come around on The New Day. Not all the way around, mind you. But Big E Langston, Kofi Kingston, and Xavier Woods are seemingly having the time of their lives being...well, trolls, for lack of a better word. They're the wrestling version of the Internet. I think. Maybe. They're not what they were originally constructed as, that's for sure.

Anyway, The New Day won the tag team titles for a second time at Summerslam by winning a four-team sudden death match (a match in which they did NOT beat the now old champs the Primetime Players). So how did they react to winning on the second biggest show of the year?

Kofi flopped like a fish.

Big E did victory laps.

And they all twerked. Or something. They're gonna start shooting Big E from the waist up eventually. I mean, there's gonna be a situation where something gets loose and the FCC will be on WWE's line. But seriously, look at them. That's pure joy right there. It's also your pick for the best moment of Summerslam 2015.

Agree with the countdown? Anything we missed (and by we, I mean you)?

Note: Many thanks to the many Tumblr users who contributed the GIFs to this countdown, including tapemachinesarerolling, wrestling-giffer, strictlywrestling, totaldivasepisodes, spaceflute, and many more. If you see your GIF and I didn't credit you, lemme know in the comments. I wasn't trying to slight you. Promise.


If you're into the classics, and I know some of you are, check out these past Cageside Countdowns.

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