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What you need to know
WIth a little pre-taped flourish that seems straight outta Dario Cueto's Temple, Authority in-fighting came to Thursday night. Blaming Kane for the fact that he has to face both Roman Reigns and Randy Orton at Payback, WWE World Heavyweight Champ Seth Rollins accused the Director of Operations of being jealous. The Demon claimed he was just making a man out of Rollins, something he would continue to do by placing him in a main event showdown with his old Shield-mate, Dean Ambrose.
Not wanting to be accused of asking The Future to do something he himself wouldn't do, Kane walked out to open Smackdown by brawling with another former Hound of Justice. Roman Reigns came through the crowd to tell us how he's hustled to get another title shot (for a whole month!), and ended up delivering another solid bout with an aging Superstar. Of course, this one didn't end in as satisfying a fashion as his Extreme Rules match with Big Show, since The Big Red Monster rolled out and walked away rather than take a Spear from the Big Dog.
Living the gimmick, Damien Sandow mimicked ring announcer JoJo then used some Hulkamania moves on the Axe-Man before taking doing his impersonation of a winner. Ryback is as confused as we are about why Bray Wyatt is attacking him, and used his victory over Luke Harper to send a message to Eater of Worlds. Bray used the abuse his former acolyte applied to Big Hungry as his opening to send him a word from Sister Abigail.
Only a few months after bullying Paige, the Bellas twins are now heroes of the downtrodden and won't stand for Cameron and Summer Rae making fun of people. At least it lead to Nikki hossing Cam around the ring en route to keeping the Divas title looking strong.
The greatest feud in WWE history delivered another stellar match, but positivity and Freebird-esque heeling were too much for facts in five languages. Xavier Woods illegally entering to break-up a pin caused by one of these forced the disqualification, meaning The New Day are still tag champs, and Makaveli has a sad. Tyson Kidd & Cesaro, on the other hand, probably have a mad, since Kofi Kingston, Big E and X continued to stomp them after the bell.
Titus O'Neil & Darren Young's latest video mocked the tag titleholders. Whether those little promos are going anywhere, or are just a page from the Wyatt handbook is anybody's guess. If you're also trying to guess why WWE would show a hype video for a recap package, feel free to let me know what you come up with...since that's exactly what they did Thursday night to roll tape on Bad News Barrett's King of the Ring win over Neville.
Main event went pretty much as you'd expect - the Lunatic Fringe fought valiantly, but the darn numbers game got the best of him in the form of J & J Security and Kane. When a beatdown came a calling after he was pinned by Rollins' replacement for the Curb Stomp, Roman kept the Smackdown bromance alive by saving his brother from a four-on-one assault.
What to look out for
They're a little late to celebrate his dad's 100th birthday, but WWE is setting up shop in a city that loves them some Bret Hart tonight. Les Habitants are on the road, meaning the Bell Centre is free for Raw. They're also down 2 - 0 to Tampa Bay in the Stanley Cup playoff second round, so the Québécois & Québécoise may be feeling ornery tonight when the pullers of screwjobs come to Montreal.
Unlike the younger guys in the Triple Threat scheduled for the top of the card at the next pay-per-view (PPV), Randy Orton had some time off at the end of the week. He'll be looking to rectify his lack of screen time tonight, for sure. Will Roman keep up? How will the champ respond?
Rather than go after Dolph Ziggler for getting him DQ'd out of the KotR tournament, or Bray Wyatt for denying him a win over Seth Rollins (and over Bray Wyatt), WWE.com is saying that Dean Ambrose will be looking for some payback against The Authority on tonight's show. Since there's a show with that name only a couple of weeks away, maybe the rumors about Roman facing Kane had the wrong former mercenary?
When he answer United States titleholder John Cena's open challenge last week, Heath Slater found himself kicked right off the stage by a certain Russia-lovin' Bulgarian. The last remaining member of 3MB has promised to answer the champ's call again this week. Wanna bet on whether or not he makes it to the ring? His odds of doing that have to be better than unseating Cena, right?
Expect to hear from the Monarch of Mean Missives tonight, perhaps about his ongoing issues with the Man who Would Be King and Who Gravity Forgot. Neville getting a rub from former King of the Ring would be a heck of a rub for the newcomer, and seems infinitely more likely than our getting any updates on the injured Intercontinental champ Daniel Bryan.
What they should do
You love The New Day vs. Catsaro. It's pretty well documented that I love The New Day vs. Catsaro. We really just need to go all the way with it.
Maddening as it is to keep hoping for a tag team resurgence in WWE, that's exactly what they've done to me again. All it takes is two defined teams with maybe another on the horizon, and they suck me right back in the whole vicious cycle. I should know better, but since I'm already here...
Kofi, E & Xavier were getting heat before Vince even wanted them to, and now that they're free to actually earn our boos, could reach nuclear levels as rudos. The Brass Ring Club have done nothing overtly lawful other than oppose New Day, and are basically faces because smarks like me love the wrestlers involved so much - and now the agents are letting them fully utilize the primary things we love about them, their workrate.
Time to interject a true blue babyface team to the recipe. Lucha Dragons are basically already over because they dress like highlighters and Kalisto is Shazam/Captain Marvel to Neville's Superman. Give us a reason to connect to them, and we might be on the verge of something we haven't experienced on Raw since the era that gave us the TLC match.
On NXT, Sin Cara cut some promos in Spanish that his partner translated. These were earnest, técnico speeches, but they'd be broken up with just enough humor when the faceless one would say goodbye to the interviewer in perfect English, leaving Kalisto to throw his arms up on confusion. It's not a character, but it's a way to humanize a couple of guys whose faces we'll never see. And it can even be used as part of a wedge to break them up when Creative decides its time to fully unleash the former Samuray Del Sol on the singles scene as their Rey Mysterio replacement.
Throw in Los Matadores as good guy jobbers and the Primetime Players as evil ones, let Natty play Chyna a bit more to counter Woods, and when Jey Uso is cleared for a return, you have the option of turning them heel (angry former champs feel they were too quickly forgotten by the fans) so you can bring up a few of the Realest Guys in pro wrestling from Developmental.
What we're afraid they will do
Break up Kidd & Cesaro. Seriously - I have had nightmares about this. I think I might watch too much wrestling, y'all.
Are we witnessing the rebirth of tag wrestling in WWE, or am I getting fooled again?
Let us know what you think, fantasy book the pairs scene or just slap me back to reality. Just be sure to watch tonight along with the best pro wrestling community on the internet, right here at Cageside Seats!