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Cageside Seats Weekly RECs: Week ending Jan. 25

Cageside Features: Our very own Cageside 'REC' Awards, for "Recognizing Excellence in Contributions from the Cageside Community". Are you a winner of the Interwebs? Could you be? Let's find out...

Cagesiders, "We aren't BOOBS! We're AWARD WINNERS!
Cagesiders, "We aren't BOOBS! We're AWARD WINNERS!

We're back with yet another dose of amazing work injected by you, the Cageside commenters. Many of you have impressed us all by producing some amazing work and golden comments yet again. So it's that time of the week to recognize the excellent FanPosts, FanShots, and comments that were the "Best in the World" (of Cageside) this past week.

As always, thanks to Cagesider Ecstasy with Extra Cheese for cleverly naming our Weekly Cageside Commenters Awards "The RECs", which perfectly sums up what this feature tries to do. After all, without all of you, Cageside Seats would not be the greatest pro wrestling website on the Internet.

So, without further ado, we present to you...

The cSs REC Awards:

Recognizing Excellence in Contributing







*To see comments in the context of their own threads, click on the 'time stamp' behind each Cagesider's name.

From the "The latest WWE Hall Of Fame rumours with Bruno Sammartino, Bob Backlund, Randy Savage, etc." thread:

21...31....81.... No one should care about Hogan anymore regardless of age. He should be off in retirement somewhere, far away from TV cameras, occasionally ranting on Twitter or whatever else washed up old wrestlers do these days. by DarkTalon on Jan 19, 2013 11:04 PM EST 2 recs

From the "Daily Open Thread for Saturday, Jan. 19: Just do The Stroke!" thread:

[The winning caption to this photo]

“Jerry, you look like you want to fuck a corpse!” by Kanenite on Jan 19, 2013 3:07 PM EST 4 recs

and also from the same thread...

Steiner Math says you would be dead in 3.7 hours by DFreshMMA on Jan 19, 2013 8:29 PM EST 3 recs

From the "Video: Roman Reigns is absolutely terrifying" thread:

I would love to see Reigns behind the counter at McDonalds screaming "You want fries with that?" at little children.But I tend to be wrong in the head, so yeah. by keyboard punk on Jan 19, 2013 2:43 PM EST

From the "Tyson Kidd hopes to make WWE return in six months after knee surgery" thread:

I used to dislocate my knees all the time when I was younger. I’m currently taking my whole life to recover. It’s a shame, because I could have been bigger than Stone Cold… by TJLethal on Jan 20, 2013 2:24 AM EST 2 recs

From the "Royal Rumble Rewind 2006: Booyaka Booyaka" thread:

What everyone in that picture is really thinking:

Shane: peace out losers i’m go work somewhere with no politicing or greedy corporate executives: CABLE
Vince: oh my god the man that won the royal rumble this year isn’t ripped enough for me to beat my meat to, what the fuck am i doing with my company?
Linda: i feel that striking a wise pose will help me gain the votes of elderly(republican) voters in my upcoming senate run
Stephanie: oh man why did i think of banging macho man while they were taking this picture?

by tripletanfan98 on Jan 20, 2013 2:29 PM EST reply actions 4 recs

From the "Cageside Seats Weekly RECs: Week ending Jan. 18" thread:

My first rec. And my mom said I’d never do anything with my life, now I can rub this in her face next Xmas. Thanks CSS! by CreatureOfTheWheel on Jan 20, 2013 2:23 PM EST 2 recs.

From the "Daily Open Thread for Sunday, Jan. 20: Locked Out of Heaven" thread:

[The winning caption to this photo]

Ladies ladies ladies... there plenty of my vegan beansprout to go around by anthony.messano on Jan 20, 2013 3:22 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

and also from the same thread...

[In reference to this]

i want to cuddle it and nurse it back to health. this gif also reminds me that i saved a cat today while at work. it was outside and the parking lot at my job is very busy. i was afraid it was going to get run over so i brought it in and kept in my office until animal rescue showed up. best half an hour of my life even though i may lose my job over it. i will not feel bad about saving noodle. (yes, we named it that) hopefully it will find a good home now byBitchHoldMyHoops on Jan 20, 2013 10:51 PM EST 4 recs


See, this is what's wrong with our culture. Back in my day, you never saw the Beulah’s of the world… oh wait, really? Ok, bad example. You never saw Chastit… REALLY, her too? What about that Gorgeous George that was Macho Man’s valet? OH COME ON! by vfn on Jan 21, 2013 1:28 AM EST 3 recs


More like a penis fly trap tonight, amirite or amirite? by Nolan Howell on Jan 21, 2013 3:37 AM EST 3 recs


some of my best work [is] After Dark. I feel like batista, confined by the PG era :p by Simark on Jan 21, 2013 4:54 AM EST 3 recs

From the "Jeff Hardy wants to sing at TNA Bound for Glory 2013" thread:

Was this really an interview with Wrestling101? Or was it actually Wrestlinglol? by Kanenite on Jan 20, 2013 1:30 PM EST 3 recs

and also from the same thread...

What is Jeff Hardy's band doing in the Impact Zone? by TheMasterGeek on Jan 20, 2013 4:50 PM EST 2 recs


Perfect time to bring back Jeff Jarrett Smash up Hardy with the guitar, claim leadership of As & 8s, and return TNA to its former glory. by Eugene Saxe on Jan 22, 2013 6:19 PM EST 1 recs

From the "WWE Raw results and live blog for Jan. 21: The Royal Rumble go home show" thread:

John Cena promo for later tonight:

“Wow! Here we are in San Jose! And what a night so far, amiright!?

The Rock is here and he’s here for the people! Randy Orton defeated Cesaro in a GRRRRREEEEEEAAAATTT MATCH! But will he win the beat the block challenge?! WHO KNOWS!? We still have one match left to find out and anything could happen!!!!"

(kids in the crowd pop because they enjoy recaps, apparently. Grown men and intelligent people boo mercilessly or otherwise shake their heads in disappointment)

“Whoever wins will get to choose their entry number in the Royal Rumble and, BY GOD, THEY COULD CHOOSE #30 AND GO ON TO MAIN EVENT WRESTLEMANIA!!!”

(yay! oh wow, someone is gonna main event wrestlemania! CENA! CENA! CENA!)

“But I know what you’re thinking. Yes, yes, I know. I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know, I know exactly what you’re thinking. People all around the world wanna know, they wanna know one thing… they wanna know…

what in blue hell was vickie guerrero wearing tonight!? I mean, she looks like a cross between a hippo and a grease-pan. So greasy, just like Dolph Ziggler’s hair, that maybe we could oil her up and chase her around the arena and see who catches her first!"

(hahahaha omg, that’s soooooo funny! CENA! CENA! CENA! )

“But seriously folks. It’s wrestlemania season, and that means business. And, you know me, I’m all about BUSINESS!”

(yayyyy!!! CENA! CENA!)

“The business of the Royal Rumble. Ladies and gentlemen, I am here to tell you that I, John Cena, have requested to choose my entry number in this year’s Rumble. It’s been a bad year for me, you all know that. I’m not the champion, I haven’t been winning every match, and I had to give away my Superstar of the Year award to Ric Flair because, well, honestly, he deserves it more than I do.

But despite how humble I am…. I’m also very hungry. There’s a fire in me that burns as bright as a star, as bright as the lights on this arena, as bright as all your faces when The Rock comes out to electrify and entertain! As bright as the sun! This fire burns in me and so I knew what I had to do.

I knew what I had to do. I knew it. I knew it. I knew what I had to do. I had to…

get a new wardrobe designer because I’ve been wearing jorts for 15 years!"

(hahaha! CENA! CENA! CENA!)

“No, but seriously. What I have to do is this:


These men have worked their whole lives for this moment. For the chance to win the Royal Rumble and main event WrestleMania! They have worked and cried and bled for this moment! The fire that burns in me, oh yes, it burns in them too! And they will each do whatever they can to stop me!

I’ll be hit with the Zig-Zag, I’ll get hit with an RKO, a Brogue Kick, a chokeslam, a tombstone piledriver, a Grotch neutralizer, a brick, a chair, a table, a baseball bat, by god, they’ll drive a truck over me to beat me! They’ll do ANYTHING!"

(CENA! CENA! CENA! Cena suddenly calms down and gets serious again. Lowers the tone of his voice)

“But believe me, San Jose. Believe me when I tell you this:

I will enter the Rumble first. But, when it’s all said and done, I will be the last one standing! AND I WILL GO ON TO MAIN EVENT WRESTLEMANIA AND BECOME THE W W E CHAMPIONNNN!!!!!!"



by liberty_JAC on Jan 21, 2013 9:32 PM EST 15 recs

From the "Daily Open Thread for Monday, Jan. 21: MLK Day" thread:

Something I've been watching every MLK Day for the last couple of years. The Boondocks: Return Of The King byIRodC on Jan 21, 2013 11:04 AM EST 3 recs

From the "WWE: Does The Rock even need to evolve as a character?" thread:

i feel like he is having inappropriate thoughts in that photo.

by DaVeganDemon on Jan 21, 2013 3:43 PM EST reply actions 5 recs

and also from the same thread...

[a long, thought out rant about fictional entertainment that I encourage everyone to read]

by Mister Wednesday Afternoon on Jan 21, 2013 6:03 PM EST reply actions 3 recs

From the "Zack Ryder tweets that he will be performing live before the Royal Rumble" thread:

[on Zack Ryder]

What is Zachary U-Haul doing in the Impact Zone? by TheMasterGeek on Jan 21, 2013 6:57 PM EST 3 recs

From the "WWE Raw results and post-Royal Rumble go home show open thread" thread:

[If Vince doesn't see how bad it is for Cena now, he never will]


by Kanenite on Jan 21, 2013 11:09 PM EST 4 recs

and also from the same thread...

Found some wrestler's reactions to Raw's ending

[Here, here, here, here, and here]

by Doors Hate MMA Fighters on Jan 21, 2013 11:18 PM EST 5 recs

From the "WWE Raw results and reactions from last night (Jan. 21): No, I'm winning the Royal Rumble" thread:

how does cm punk get through tsa so fast? He carries his bags under his eyes by rancho king on Jan 22, 2013 9:18 AM EST 4 recs

and also from the same thread...

No, who the hell hasn’t dropped figure fours all the time either as a kid or throughout his “training”? It’s borderline absurd he couldn’t do it properly.

by TMadeBurner on Jan 22, 2013 12:39 PM EST 4 recs


One other thing. Punk should also lose clean. He’s had a great reign, and great reigns deserve great endings. This isn’t just me fantasy booking what I want, if it were up to me, I’d have one in ten title changes involving outside interference, if any. But even by WWE standards, it’d be ridiculous for Punk to lose the belt by any method other than the Rock Bottom. by *Asterisk* on Jan 22, 2013 10:16 AM EST 4 recs


I am however interested in buying a ticket to John Cena Guesses What You Did Yesterday by hfl2013 on Jan 22, 2013 2:01 PM EST 3 recs

From the "Daily Open Thread for Tuesday, Jan. 22: Forty Six & 2" thread:

[the winning caption to this photo]

Why yes, brother, I WOULD hit it like an angry bilgesnipe, why do you ask? by Kryptik on Jan 22, 2013 3:54 PM EST 1 recs

and also from the same thread...

[the winning caption to this photo]

"Yes it's true. This man has no dick" by rancho king on Jan 22, 2013 5:18 PM EST 1 recs


CJ should go enroll in Dr. Shelby’s School of Beauty by Kanenite on Jan 23, 2013 12:32 AM EST 1 recs


The real Cena being heavenly reassures my atheism. by Nolan Howell on Jan 23, 2013 1:30 AM EST 4 recs

From the "Video: Dr. Shelby is a bigger star in WWE than half the roster" thread:

Dr. Shelby should be given a shot at The Streak this year by Vemasa_Gore on Jan 22, 2013 2:35 PM EST 3 recs

From the "Brooke Hogan wedding with boob slip does big ratings for TNA on Spike TV" thread:

Oh my god, what are Brooke's kittens doing in the Impact Zone?!?! by TJLethal on Jan 22, 2013 9:35 PM EST 1 recs

and also from the same thread...



Oh my god! He just laid out Hogan! And now... And... Oh... He's sucking his dick... by TJLethal on Jan 23, 2013 5:24 AM EST 1 recs


He could reprise his “Disciple” character and join aces & 8s… “What’s the Apostle doing in the impact zone?” byRECE ROCK on Jan 23, 2013 10:28 PM EST

From the "Daily Open Thread for Wednesday, Jan. 23: Wish You Were Here" thread:

[Ed O'Neil is a] BJJ Blackbelt, and he once scored 4 touchdowns in a game at Polk High. What an athlete. byTMadeBurner on Jan 23, 2013 10:05 AM EST 1 recs

and also from the same thread...

*UPDATE* SO I haven’t smoked a cigarette since I made my announcement on last night’s daily thread. I guess im doin alright. I just woke up, and my urges are at its highest right now, but I will be okay. It doesnt help when the girly leaves her pack of cigarettes here on my book shelf, but I guess it makes me feel stronger to know I can, but wont. Anyways, I havent failed. I wont fail. by CaseygarnerPDX on Jan 23, 2013 3:45 PM EST 7 recs


What's Cena John doing on Cageside?!?!?!? Does he even work for this company?!?!?? by Blueblob4life on Jan 23, 2013 4:32 PM EST 3 recs


I'm glad you're back But you’ll soon realize your arms are too short to blog with god! by GreyedOut on Jan 23, 2013 4:40 PM EST 2 recs


Needs to work on his enunciation. He’s actually saying “Boo-itch”

by ReverendKain on Jan 23, 2013 11:05 PM EST 2 recs

From the "WWE Main Event results and live blog for Jan. 23: Antonio Cesaro vs. Ryback" thread:

Since he's been gone for two days, I wonder if CJ will be gassed halfway through the blog. And have someone else finish. by TheMasterGeek on Jan 23, 2013 6:33 PM EST 1 recs

and also from the same thread...

I want to see a video of Sandow and Rhodes skipping around set to "Best Friend" Backstage, at the hotel, at local landmarks, it could be a thing. by keyboard punk on Jan 23, 2013 8:54 PM EST 1 recs

From the "Reports state Kid Kash is gone from TNA while he denies as much" thread:

Ace’s & 8’s just got 2 new members eh? by The LOOGY on Jan 23, 2013 3:39 PM EST

and also from the same thread...

That joke doesn’t work quite as well when the guys in question are already in TNA… by DarkTalon on Jan 23, 2013 3:41 PM EST 1 recs


"What are Jesus Newcastle and Boy Bucks doing in the Impact Zone?!" by ReverendKain on Jan 23, 2013 3:43 PM EST

From the "Daily Open Thread for Thursday, Jan. 24: Ecstasy of Gold" thread:

[the winning caption to this photo]

“Okay, Santino, this time I’ll be the hulking psychotic masked mountain of a man, and you be a towelboy.”

“Sonamagun! You are always playing the sames in our sexytimes!”

by ReverendKain on Jan 24, 2013 1:32 PM EST 1 recs

and also from the same thread...

Aw thanks, General. I like the ringing endorsement. Chocolate for all!! Except for almost all of the dudes on cSs…………no offense. by Blueblob4life on Jan 24, 2013 4:58 PM EST 3 recs

From the "Royal Rumble Rewind 2010: You think you know him" thread:

I feel like that is how Vince ends all of his crazy pitches to the creative team.

“All right, so we’ll have Jericho and Edge feud…”




by DarkTalon on Jan 24, 2013 3:03 PM EST 1 recs

From the "Kurt Angle on retiring from pro wrestling: I've got three more years" thread:

"When I'm gone, I'm gone." Sounds like he’s Keyser Söze… The greatest trick the Olympic champion ever pulled was convincing the world he wouldn’t return. by RECE ROCK on Jan 24, 2013 3:19 PM EST 4 recs

From the "Who's going to win the Royal Rumble this year?" thread:

Shield will interfere in Punk/Rock causing Vince to strip Punk of the title and put it on the line in the Rumble 1992 style for Cena to win and check that one off his list. by The so-called Beautiful on Jan 24, 2013 4:34 PM EST 4 recs

From the "Daily Open Thread for Friday, Jan. 25: Try" thread:

[the winning caption to this photo]

Teddy: “That’s it, we’ve got ourselves a tag team match playa!”
Christian: “But Teddy, I’m the only person in the ri…”
Teddy: “What part of ‘Tag. Team. Match. Playa’ don’t you understand?”

by DarkTalon on Jan 25, 2013 9:17 AM EST 7 recs

and also from the same thread...

I'm pretty sure people who die playing hockey go to Valhalla. Not a sports guy, could be wrong, but it feels so ReverendKain on Jan 25, 2013 1:07 PM EST 1 recs


WRONG! It’s “Thank you ma’am, may I have another?” Yeesh

by Blueblob4life on Jan 26, 2013 2:38 AM EST 1 recs


In closing, Cagesiders, don't forget these awards are all about YOU; so if you think I missed anything, or have any suggestions or tweaks for the Cageside RECs, please let us know in the comments below, or email one of the site editors through our Masthead page. Bring it on with some awesome award-winning stuff for next week's RECs. Until then, see ya in the threads!


Editors Note: Get Internet Famous! (Even If You're Nobody) You Too Can Win The Interwebs! Remember, you can't win a Cageside REC Award* if you don't play, er um contribute.

*Disclaimer: Winning the Internet - via The Cageside REC Awards in this weekly column guarantees you nothing but Internet notoriety within a small community of pro wrestling smarks. is not responsible for any harm you may or may not do to yourself or others in the event you are unable to handle your newfound Internet fame as a result of winning this award. That is all, stay calm and carry on.


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