WWE Raw Results April 12, 2010

This week's Raw results from London, England after the jump:

1. Eve Torres defeated WWE Divas Champion Maryse to win the WWE Divas Championship after blocking the DDT into an STO into a bridge.
2. WWE Unified Tag Team Champion and US Champion The Miz defeated David Hart Smith (with Tyson Kidd and Natalya) in a non-title match after hitting the Skull Crushing Finale.
3. Evan Bourne defeated Carlito after hitting Air Bourne.
4. WWE Champion John Cena defeated David "A-List" Otunga in a non-title match after making Otunga tap to the STF.
5. Kofi Kingston defeated Sheamus by disqualification after Sheamus used the TV monitor on Kofi.
6. The Bella Twins defeated Gail Kim and Kelly Kelly and Rosa Mendes and Jillian Hall and in a Baywatch Babe Triple Threat Tag Team Match when Brie (?) pinned Rosa with an inside cradleish move.
7. Randy Orton defeated Batista by disqualification after Jack Swagger ran in and hit the Doctor Bomb on Orton.

• Raw opened with David Hasselhoff pulling up in a mock KITT car and to the Knight Rider theme into some new song by the man.  There was also some bit with women dressed as friars that was probably lost upon me.  Hasselhoff was massively over with the Brits, and they were chanting Hoff a bunch.  I don't know if it's an inside joke in the UK or something, but he got great reactions for everything.  In fact, I might have to say that they give the Germans a run for their money in the "loving David Hasselhoff" department.  He set a Baywatch Babe Triple Threat Tag Team match for later in the show, and set a Jack Swagger/Randy Orton match for Extreme Rules, and set an Orton/Batista match for the main event.
• The women's title match was short and inoffensive.  I like Eve and think she can be a decent worker.  Maryse would be better off as a manager because her character and heel charisma is off the charts, but she seems clumsy as a worker.
• WWE Unified Tag Team Champions ShowMiz came out, with Miz proclaiming their team the best in WWE history.  He was interrupted by Bret Hart, who disagreed, naming the Hart Foundation and the British Bulldogs as better teams.  Bret was massively over in England.  Show implored Bret to leave the ring, but Bret refused, saying there was a tag team in the back that could beat them, and he brought out the Hart Dynasty.  After David Hart Smith did an interview invoking his dad's name, a match was set up between Smith and The Miz, where if Smith won, the Harts received a title match at Extreme Rules, but if Miz won, Bret had to declare ShowMiz the greatest tag team of all time next week on Raw.  The match itself was OK, typical Raw match.  Big Show interfered to help Miz pick up the win, so I guess Bret is sticking around a bit longer than expected.
• They recapped the Otunga angle from last week, into the angle where Batista laid out Cena again.  They really seem to be spotlighting Otunga here, trying to make him stand out more.  After the video aired, they showed Batista and Otunga interacting backstage, where Batista at first said that Otunga reminded him of a young Batista, but then ordered him to give him a cup of coffee.  Otunga then ran into Hasselhoff backstage, where he was told Otunga had been invited to Raw not by Hasselhoff, but by John Cena, and he was going to face Cena tonight.
• Was somebody asleep at the switch today?  Because WWE aired a Superstars match on Raw tonight with Carlito and Evan Bourne.  Wait...that was a Raw match?  Just a cold match between two low card guys going nowhere airing in the first half of the show during TNA?  And it wasn't a setup for a Sheamus run-in or something?  That was...odd.  Good match, maybe there is some hope for the Evan Bourne.  Only WWE could confuse me by airing a wrestling match.
  
• The Cena/Otunga match was, as you'd expect, very basic, with Cena doing some basic first day of wrestling school chain wrestling.  Batista watched the match from the ramp.  Otunga got no offense in and wasn't allowed to do anything too complicated before tapping to the STF.  It really sinks in that, as much play as Otunga is getting on NXT and Raw, he really can't win NXT because he is beyond limited as a worker.  Batista teased getting in the ring with Batista but then retreated to the back.  It seemed like this was mostly an excuse to have Cena in the ring when TNA went off the air to keep eyeballs glued to Raw.
• Sheamus came out and cut a promo announcing his match with Triple H at Extreme Rules would be a street fight.  Kofi Kingston then came out looking for revenge for last week, and said that David Hasselhoff scheduled a Kofi/Sheamus match for tonight.  Kofi wasn't booked to look like a complete geek in the match itself, but he was laid out again to keep the focus on Sheamus heading into his match with Triple H at Extreme Rules.
• They aired another promo video for the WWE Draft, which takes place in two weeks.  I have to say, I'm going to miss my favorite Draft tradition from the past few years, which was the yearly pillaging of ECW.  That will be missed.  However, after the video aired, they showed Carlito walking by Hasselhoff's backstage area before running into Vladimir Kozlov, who was just kind of standing around for no reason.  Carlito declared that the guest hosts on Raw don't care about the wrestlers, and only about getting their stuff over, and said if he isn't drafted to Smackdown, he's going to quit.  Kozlov asked who is hosting Raw next week, and when informed by Carlito that it was the cast of Macgruber, vowed that if he does not get what he wants next week, he will DESTROY MACGRUBER.  Quite frankly, that sounds like it could be incredible and I actually am looking forward to something on Raw next week.
• After the announcers hyped the Extreme Rules PPV, Randy Orton cut a boring backstage promo hyping both his match with Jack Swagger at Extreme Rules and his match tonight with Batista.
• All of the teams in the Baywatch Babe Triple Threat Tag Team Match came to the ring dressed in swimsuits to the Baywatch theme, complete with the slow motion Baywatch job towards the ring.  David Hasselhoff was the special guest lifeguard (whatever that means) and Santino Marella (dressed in lifeguard garb) was the special guest referee, in what seems like the first time Santino has been in front of the crowd in months. Afterwards, Jillian slapped Santino, which caused him to swallow his whistle, and was saved by Hornswoggle, who managed to unlodge the whistle by giving Santino the tadpole splash.  This was what it was.
• The Orton/Batista match was their typical match until the crap finish.  After Swagger left the ring, Cena hit the ring, attacked Swagger, and put the STF on Batista until Batista passed out and was left laying.  With two weeks before Extreme Rules, I'm sure Batista will get his revenge sometime between now and then, because that's how WWE works.

Overall, a kind of typical blah Raw, nothing too much worth going your way out to see.  The Macgruber stuff next week should be interesting.