WWE has people talking about the upcoming episode of Raw, and not for the prospect of a five-star wrestling match.
No, we’re speculating on the promised reveal of whatever a mysterious third party has been using to threaten General Manager Kurt Angle. A scene with the Hall of Famer at the end of the July 10 episode depicted Angle vowing to break the story himself by bringing someone to this week’s show in Nashville... someone he said “I love you” to during their phone conversation.
Since the show is in Nashville, headquarters of the wrestling promotion once known as TNA, and the Tennessee city is also home to TNA’s former owner and President Dixie Carter, who recently appeared on WWE Network in support of Angle, there have been whispers she could show up on Raw and even be unveiled as Kurt’s paramour.
My boss is not going to like it, but I say BRING IT ON.
Unless Vince McMahon is plotting a swerve and this isn’t a love affair and/or illegitimate child angle, I have zero confidence it’s going to lead to something I’ll look back on fondly from some future point in my fandom. I’m not ashamed of the fact pro wrestling borrows from soap operas and vice-versa, but the more over-the-top examples of when they do aren’t my thing.
Basically, if this isn’t leading to a Macho Man-reuniting-with-Miss Elizabeth moment, I’m probably not gonna be too terribly interested. That’s the bar I compare every other wrestling romance angle to, and nothing’s matched up yet (sorry, John & Nicole, not even “real” ones. And, yes, the quotes are because I’m Team Mizanin).
So I’m rooting for trainwreck. That, camp, or cringe comedy. Angle’s got the chops to make me laugh in almost anything, and Dixie is... Dixie. Geno’s not wrong when he evaluates her abilities. But he’s missing out on the possibilities having someone like her on Raw creates.
John Laurinaitis isn’t ever gonna be confused for an Emmy winner, but his time on Monday nights gave us “People Power” (and its associated scooter), and I wouldn’t trade that for the world.
Unlike Johnny Ace’s tenure as GM, a run by Carter could be structured to maximize fun and minimize damage, too. While I don’t have a whole lot of faith in WWE’s ability to edit a story down, there’s no reason Dixie has to become someone who’s on Monday nights from now until WrestleMania. Even if the story she takes part in continues after she’s gone, bring her on for a couple nights of awkward, so-bad-it’s-good “drama” and move on.
A week ago an appearance by Carter on WWE television wasn’t even on my radar, let alone my pro wrestling wish list. But considering where it looks like we’re headed with this Angle story, I’m just hoping they don’t do anything offensive. If in a month I look back and say, “you know, Raw made me re-consider my views on love. I’m gonna go hug my partner and tell her how much I appreciate her,” I’ll be the first one to come on here and admit I was wrong.
But my experience tells me it’s gonna be bad. So let’s make it gloriously so.
Bring on Dixie Carter.