WWE Main Event comes waltzing back into our lives tonight (Tues., Mar. 18, 2014) from the Toyota Center in Houston, Texas, and we'll have complete results and a live blog for the show right when it kicks off at 8 p.m. ET on the WWE Network.
Tonight's show is a special one because it will mark the first time Undertaker will have made an appearance on the show. He'll be in for a promo to respond to Paul Heyman's rant on Raw last night but don't expect much else.
Be sure to come back here at 8 p.m. ET for the Main Event live blog.
WWE MAIN EVENT RESULTS & LIVE BLOG MAR. 18
Broadcast is live!
We'll start with a tag team match.
Rhodes Brothers vs. Real Americans
For those still wondering about Goldust's health, he is absolutely fine.
We're told that there will be a Fatal Four-Way match on SmackDown to determine the number one contenders to the tag team titles. I heard The Shield and 3MB will be involved, though I assume these two teams will as well.
As for this match, the Americans controlled early until Goldust got in with a head of steam and went barreling through both Cesaro and Jack Swagger. The former was the one who broke it up to give the heels control again.
They reversed the roles for the latter half of the match with Goldust working hard to overcome the heels for a hot tag to Cody Rhodes. They teased it but didn't come through thanks to Cesaro hitting Cody with a boot and following up with the Swing on Goldust back in the ring.
Finally, Cody got the hot tag and came in on fire, taking out both heels. A moonsault got a two count on Swagger before he reversed a Disaster Kick into the Patriot Act. After getting out, Cody hit the Cross Rhodes and got the clean pinfall victory.
Rhodes Brothers def. Real Americans
Of note here is they're no longer teasing any dissension between Cesaro and Swagger.
Funkadactyls vs. Layla & Alicia Fox
This is an interesting way to bring Layla back to television, simply by having her show up unadvertised on a Main Event on the Network. Not that her return would have meant anything for viewership numbers anyway.
The match starts with an ugly botch with Naomi failing to roll Alicia up and landing on her face trying to bridge. No one was injured, thankfully.
They did play up Layla coming into the match. Don't worry, they botched another spot about 35 seconds into it, again on a roll up attempt.
There was yet another bad botch later in the match with Cameron failing to springboard off Fox's back into a clothesline of Layla. It was awful. She and Layla just sort of rolled out of the ring together and Naomi hit the Rear View and split legged moonsault for the pin.
Funkadactyls def. Layla & Alicia Fox
Welcome back, Layla, you're doing the job!
Big Show vs. Titus O'Neil
During his entrance, Show stopped when he got on the ring apron and, for whatever reason, decided to shake his ass before climbing over the ropes. That was disturbing.
O'Neil did some taunting just before the match started, so Show got pissed and went about destroying him. Titus' comeback came via diving at Show's knees, a psychologically sound strategy. Then he got cocky again after gaining control of the match.
At one point he mocked a "Big Show" chant by going along with it then shouting "BIG BABY!" That was fun.
The finish saw Show recover while he was set up in the corner, grab O'Neil like he was going to choke slam him, stare him down with death in his eyes, then push off and hit the KO punch.
Big Show def. Titus O'Neil
That wasn't much of anything, just a match to put on the show.
Undertaker is up next.
Suddenly, Lillian Garcia is telling us Paul Heyman is here and he grabs the mic before getting into the ring. He tells us he just wants to take a moment to say he means no disrespect to Undertaker by taking any of his time because he'll get all the disrespect he can handle at WrestleMania.
Heyman says Brock Lesnar asked him to come deliver a message for him. He heels on the state of Texas to get some cheap heat. The crowd isn't responding all that well to any of this.
Once again, the talking point is the streak. This time Heyman says it's more valuable than the WWE world heavyweight title. It's so valuable, in fact, that Lesnar wanted Heyman to come here to say that it's not a prediction but it's a guarantee that the streak will end on April 6, 2014, at WrestleMania.
Heyman said an awful lot without really saying anything at all.
As he was going to leave when he finished up, the gong hit and we got to watch a great reaction before the light's went down at least.
When the lights come up, Undertaker is in the ring already and he's behind Heyman, who doesn't notice him because he's looking at the entrance ramp.
Undertaker gets the mic while he's got his hand on Heyman's throat. He says there's only one reason Heyman is walking out of here tonight it's because he wants Paul to tell his client that when Undertaker gets to New Orleans, he's going to slay the beast. And when he's done, he's going to take Brock's rotting corpse and throw it into the eternal pit of rotting hell.
He also says if there's something about the message Brock doesn't understand, he'll be in Brooklyn for Raw next Monday so he can deliver the message himself.
I gotta say, Undertaker's goatee is glorious.
They fade to black with Undertaker doing the throat slash to Heyman as he retreats to the back.