Eva Marie is our ring announcer, because ratings, bitches. If you ever wished Vickie Guerrero had a more annoying voice and didn't know how to use it in a pro wrestling setting, well, wish no more.
The Usos & Justin Gabriel defeat 3MB
in approximately four minutes via pinfall when Gabriel pins Drew McIntyre
Justin Gabriel is wearing the Uso yellow and blue tribal face paint. Multiple people were involved in this, looked at it and then said, "sure, great idea". Just want to be clear.
Heath Slater starts off against Jey Uso, but all three of the faces work their way in by doing springboard chops on the band leader's arm while the guy who tagged them in holds it in an armbar. Jimmy seems to roll his ankle when he jumps in - it's noticeable enough that Tony Dawson and Alex Riley mention it - but it never comes up again, although I don't think he's ever legally tagged back in, either.
Jey chases Slater out of the ring, allowing Drew McIntyre to make a blind tag and get his team back in the match when he clubs the Uso on his slide back in to the squared circle. Drew and Jinder Mahal execute a tandem strike before a neckbreaker from the fresh heel.
A backdrop lets the Samoan reach his South African partner, while Mahal gets to McIntyre. A frenetic series from the Daredevil ends with a moonsault and a cover, but Jinder breaks that up. This leads to the twins taking out Drew's bandmates and finishing them off with dives to the floor.
In legal action, JG downs the Scotsman with a tilt-a-whirl DDT and finishes him off with the 450° splash (and it looked like his knee landed right on McIntyre's sternum in an incredible painful way).
Match Footage below via WWE.com's Official YouTube Channel:
WWE hasn't released it yet, but when they do, we'll add it here!
Recap package of CM Punk vs. Paul Heyman and the post-match emotional S&M with Paul Heyman. Then comes highlights of Christian's latest one more match against the WWE Champion and Daniel Bryan's paint job on Chekhov's SUV.
Antonio Cesaro defeats Dolph Ziggler
in approximately nine minutes via pinfall
If they're not gonna do anything else with him, this recapper is 100% okay with them making Cesaro Mr. Superstars. I'm not his biggest fan, but that goes for the Z-man, too. Really curious about the reasoning behind the last couple of editions of this HuluPlus streaming show. These could be Main Event headliners. I'm not complaining, just wondering if they're trying to get a new television deal in the States for this program or something.
Zeb Colter and Jack Swagger are with AC, but we're spared or deprived (depending on your views on the "We the People" gimmick) a promo.
A very warm-up match start sees Cesaro shoulder block Dolph to the canvas twice before the Show-Off drop kicks Antonio down twice. When Ziggler goes for his Flair-ian taunting strut, the Swiss kicks him in the gut and gives him a European.
The early going has each guy get in their spots, but the tide turns when Cesaro distracts the referee, allowing Swagger to clothesline the face from the apron. The middle portion keeps The Real American in charge with occasional fighting spirit comeback attempts from DZ.
The final act starts with the first of the Holy $#!+ moments you'd expect from a dance between these two. Antonio pops Dolph up for a European, but Ziggler grabs his neck on the way up for a kind of suplex-DDT. I'm open to help on the call there, but as the WWE the Magazine ad says...
That's a great ad.
The former World Heavyweight Champ (WHC) goes up top to follow up that maneuver, but his former tag partner distracts him and gives Cesaro a chance to hit the ropes and knock Ziggy off balance. That sets up the OMG delayed deadlift superplex. My only complaint about this whole match is that Dolph doesn't really sell the effect of that spot, as he gets right back up after a cover and tries for a roll-up of his own and a dropkick for two.
It kind of goes crazy from there, but there's a sweet bit where the former United States champ goes for his tilt-a-whirl backbreaker and Dolph grabs his neck to turn it into a sleeper. The Real Americans rep as the most not-helping partners in history continues when Swagger fails to connect a second time and takes a vicious looking bump off the announce table in response to a dropkick from Ziggler.
A Zig-Zag only gets a nearfall and a frustrated #Heel has a second sleeper attempt shrugged off when the Swiss Superman grabs the ropes. He then connects with Swiss Death and a Neutralizer as frogs rain from the sky because a rudo has won on Superstars.
Match Footage below via WWE.com's Official YouTube Channel:
WWE hasn't released it yet, but when they do, we'll add it here!
We see Daniel Bryan surviving the gauntlet of The Shield but being laid low by HHH and his lackey Randy Orton.
I'm sure I'll catch hell for this after folks got on for being too harsh in my NXT grade yesterday, but the second match is worth seeking out and makes this edition worthy of a B grade.
Well?