Cageside Seats Weekly RECs: Weeks ending April 19 & 26

Cagesiders: "We aren't BOOBS-we're AWARD WINNERS!"

Cageside Features: Our very own Cageside 'REC' Awards, for "Recognizing Excellence in Contributions from the Cageside Community". Are you a winner of the Interwebs? Could you be? Let's find out...

We're back with yet another dose of amazing work injected by you, the CageSide commenters. Many of you have impressed us all by producing some amazing work and golden comments yet again. So it's that time of the week to recognize the excellent FanPosts, FanShots, and comments that were the "Best in the World" (of Cageside) this past week.

As always, thanks to Cagesider Ecstasy with Extra Cheese for cleverly naming our Weekly CageSide Commenters Awards "The RECs", which perfectly sums up what this feature tries to do. After all, without all of you, CageSide Seats would not be the greatest pro wrestling website on the Internet.

So, without further ado, we present to you...

The cSs REC Awards:

Recognizing Excellence in Contributing

____________________________

FOR EXCELLENCE IN AUTHORING OF FANPOSTS:

____________________________

FOR EXCEPTIONAL PRODUCTION OF FANSHOTS:

____________________________

FOR SUPREMACY IN COMMENTING IN THE THREADS*:

*To see comments in the context of their own threads, click on the 'time stamp' behind each Cagesider's name.

From the "Photos of proposed WWE championship belt designs" thread:

It's amazing how

They haven't got a single design that screams "class" from the initial designs. Those all look like something I'd see on the Power Rangers. (Dear lord, an intergalactic wrestling federation - why hasn't Saban done this yet?)

by Ravi Sinha on Apr 13, 2013 | 4:42 AM reply rec (6)

and in reply...

It's been done.

See Kinnikuman/Ultimate Muscle

by IRodC on Apr 13, 2013 | 8:40 AM up reply rec (6)

From the "Wrestler Wrankings -- WrestleMania 29, 2012-13 Season Wrap Up" thread:

See:

http://i.imgur.com/HfO9MwA.jpg

by My Big Mouth on Apr 13, 2013 | 6:18 AM reply rec (7)

From the "WWE SmackDown results and reactions from last night (April 12): DUH DAH! DA DA DADADADA! DUH DAH!" thread:

I'm Latino

and this guy Fannnnn-Dannnnng-Goooo really sucks at dancing, he does not have any kind of rhythm, although for a North American is the best in the world

by J.M. Navia on Apr 13, 2013 | 7:18 AM reply rec (3)

and from the same thread...

I enjoy seeing the Bella twins on my TV

even if it's only for a few minutes each week. I do not care what they're doing.

by TheCrow4Life on Apr 13, 2013 | 10:24 AM reply rec (3)

From the "CSSGTTT Elite Eight Round: (1) Dudley Boyz vs. (2) British Bulldogs" thread:

As much as I enjoy these tournaments I really think they should be called "Most Popular.........................", because that's all they are really, popularity contests.
Some of the reasons given on here for not voting for a team or a wrestler, like, "I just don't like him", are just, well, ridiculous.
Personal feelings should be put aside and credit should be given where it is due for talent and all around abilities.
That's why ratings given by Dave Meltzer or PWI are always gonna be taken much more seriously than those of some douche IWC nerds who have a grudge against someone for whatever sad reason.

by Matt Mosley on Apr 13, 2013 | 6:33 AM up rec (3)

and from the same thread...

Back in my day, we had to walk two miles up hill (both ways) just to have a tag team division...!!!

by ultmma on Apr 13, 2013 | 2:57 PM up rec (5)

From the "The Rock injury update: No surgery but no word on pro wrestling future" thread:

Money talks and Brahma bullshit walks.

by keyboard punk on Apr 13, 2013 | 2:00 PM reply rec (6)

and from the same thread...

Rocky'd be out tens of millions if he elected for surgery now.

And his producers would be out even more.

He's pretty much the hardest dude ever for this, and anyone who thinks otherwise can dangle a sledgehammer around their nuts.

by *Asterisk* on Apr 13, 2013 | 2:20 PM reply rec (7)

From the "Randy Orton comments on raucous Raw crowd" thread:

That comment was about as genuine as the Randy Orton babyface character.

by Cole_Miner on Apr 13, 2013 | 3:12 PM reply rec (19)

and in reply...

LOL

Wait he's only just realizing the crowd was hot and chanting for everything but him. Ok! I did feel a bit sorry at first, but when you have a crowd like that you should try interact with them or it should get you pumped up to put on a show. Instead of just ignoring and scouring at them. And forgetting his line was just mind blowing, start giving a shit Randy!

by Propopro on Apr 13, 2013 | 3:51 PM reply rec (7)

and...

Sheamus already told him what to say once....

by DaVeganDemon on Apr 13, 2013 | 5:22 PM up reply rec (20)

From the "WWE News: Why Dolph Ziggler has jobbed so much, nixed Jack Swagger title run" thread:

Makes sense.

Like how they had John Cena lose clean to everyone on the roster for the past year. It made everyone cheer for him when he finally, against all odds, beat the Rock. By the way, I only watch Smackdown recaps.

by Lamarley on Apr 13, 2013 | 7:51 PM reply rec (19)

and from the same thread...

It's the least effective way to push anybody, champ or no, face or heel, and I can't believe you'd suggest otherwise.

Not that they should give Ziggler a bunch of clean wins 95% of the time. They shouldn't in general for heels. What they needed to do wasn't to make sure fans saw Ziggler not lose his matches.

Having Ziggler getting his ass kicked by the babyface only to have him grab the tights, cheap shot a face with a secret weapon or low blow, or having Big E hit his finisher on the face while AJ distracts the ref is all that WWE would've needed to do to get Ziggler's future opponents over as able to beat him without jobbing the poor bastard out on his way to the top. That way, you make fans desperate to see someone finally outplay the little bastard and beat him clean after months of watching him win dirty.

I've already seen Ziggler job clean to John Cena, Sheamus, Ryback, Daniel Bryan and Kane via pinfall, and Del Rio, Jericho, and the motherfucking Miz via submission in the past year alone for free. That's pretty much all his possible opponents over the next year. Why should I give a shit about seeing him finally getting his ass beat on PPV when I've seen him eat clean losses to every meaningful face in the company on free TV?

For that matter, why should I give a shit about a belt held by a guy who's eaten clean losses in quick, decisive fashion to eight different guys four months?

by *Asterisk* on Apr 14, 2013 | 3:42 AM up reply rec (7)

From the "CSSGTTT Elite Eight Round: (1) Edge & Christian vs. (3) Brainbusters" thread:

Vote - E & C

I never seen Tully come off the top of a 20ft ladder...or have a totally awesome 5 second pose for those with the benefit of flash photography!

by BlackRob on Apr 14, 2013 | 8:04 AM rec (6)

and from the same thread...

Well that's because the Brainbusters were great wrestlers and didn't need the gimmicks.

by vfn on Apr 14, 2013 | 9:40 AM up rec (12)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Sunday, April 14" thread:

If only.

"Needed: Thirty well-shapen, semi-attractive men to act out soap opera designed specifically for a male audience. Shirt not needed for audition. Must be able to slam a man without hurting him."

Ok, so the ad still needs a bit of work.

by jwparks87 on Apr 15, 2013 | 1:31 AM up reply rec (5)

and from the same thread...

Ate another fine meal at Tara's (Lisa's) restaurant, The Squared Circle tonight.

She even sat next to me and chatted me up for a good while. She went to the Shimmer event today and we talked about our experiences there for a bit while watching Vengeance 2006 where her and Christy Hemme duked it out. Guys, if Tara gets meaner, it's because of watching that PPV again and listening to her critique herself. She was also considering adding Goddess Athena's top rope diving stunner to her move list to freshen things up. Not likely, but seeing her eyes widen at the brilliance of the move was something special.

It was confirmed for me that Kane, Matt Morgan, and Viscera are all super nice guys who are really intelligent. Apparently, Kane reads a book a day and Morgan does like three a week. I also secured an interview with Lisa for a class project, so yeah, that happened.

And I found out that my imaginary BFF ODB will be bartending at Lisa's restaurant on May 16th. Normally I have class but I'm skipping that motherfucker to go see her and chat her up.

Some days I really love being a wrestling fan.

by Blueblob4life on Apr 14, 2013 | 11:54 PM reply rec (3)

From the "Cageside Seats Weekly RECs: Week ending April 12" thread:

Asterisk put me over

I'm a made man now

by Steve Sypa on Apr 14, 2013 | 8:27 PM up reply rec (3)

and from the same thread...

I'm at my crap job right now

But one of my comments was posted in this article. Later Staples, I'm internet famous now.

"How would I describe myself? Three words: hard working, alpha male, jackhammer...merciless...insatiable..." -Dwight Schrute "When life gives you lemons make lemonade. I read that one on a can of lemonade. I like to think it applies to life." -Andy Dwyer

by BFisch28 on Apr 14, 2013 | 12:57 PM reply rec (5)

and...

A boyhood dream come true

My first rec! Thanks to all of the CageSiders for making this site what it is. I come for the articles but stay for comments section.

I avoid comments sections on YouTube and various news sites; I make an effort to read the comments here for insight and perspective.

by Primus Flavius on Apr 14, 2013 | 1:13 PM reply rec (3)

and...

Woo! Pretty sure that was my first comment ever in an open thread.

I will now float down into the mid-card, never living up to the potential I showed in my debut.

by jwparks87 on Apr 14, 2013 | 8:35 PM reply rec (6)

Pic: CM Punk and Lita at the TUF 17 Finale in Las Vegas

and...

ARMBAR

[Ronda Rousey] and y2j are a match made in heaven.

by Simark on Apr 14, 2013 | 9:54 PM up reply rec (11)

From the "Rumor Roundup for Monday, April 15: Fandango, Jack Swagger, Scott Hall, and more!" thread:

Thwagger ruins everything

The idea that a Thwagger reign would have kept Ziggler from cashing in is offensive to me as a wrestling fan.

And a fan of acting.

And a human being.

by Flashking on Apr 15, 2013 | 8:05 AM reply rec (7)

and from the same thread...

Sorry Antonio

but I'm all in with Faaaaaandaaaaangoooooo (you have to let the a's breathe...) right now.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 15, 2013 | 8:19 AM reply rec (6)

[Chyna] was a shitty wrestler.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 15, 2013 | 10:56 AM up reply rec (7)

and...

Ryback should use the Torture Rack, then when they tap he should drop them with the Shellshock

That's good monster heeling

by Bad-Horse on Apr 15, 2013 | 1:38 PM up reply rec (12)

and...

60 marines, each with their own tank

by ReverendKain on Apr 15, 2013 | 3:45 PM up reply rec (7)

and...

RE: Fandango

"Big things" and "secondary titles" are mutually exclusive.

by Eugene Saxe on Apr 15, 2013 | 1:07 PM reply rec (6)

and...

[Batista] is also waiting for them to call up new divas

by rancho king on Apr 15, 2013 | 2:18 PM up reply rec (8)

From the "CSSGTTT Final Four Match: (1) Road Warriors vs. (1) Hart Foundation" thread:

Well....

Vs. Austin WM13
Vs. Owen WM 10, Summerslam 
Vs. Bulldog...SS 92
Vs. 123 Kid
Vs. Benoit
Vs. HBK 
Vs. Piper in a bloodbath
Etc etc etc.....should I keep going?

You going to seriously tell me that those guys carried Hart in all those matches too?

by BlackRob on Apr 15, 2013 | 12:26 PM up rec (9)

and from the same thread...

Don't know if you guys are seeing the BS that asshole is doing in Boston but

I'd like to see these fuckers giving a Hart Attach followed by a Doomsday Device!!!!

by Cyznutz on Apr 15, 2013 | 4:05 PM rec (7)

From the "WWE Raw results and live blog for April 15: CM Punk returns" thread:

[On hiring Paul Heyman for ones personal life]

My client would like you to know

that YES...he will take fries with that.

by neverAcquiesce on Apr 15, 2013 | 8:31 PM up reply rec (4)

and from the same thread:

RIP Fandangoing - 04/2013 - 04/2013

by Flashking on Apr 15, 2013 | 9:59 PM reply rec (6)

and...

Just jumped the Sharkdango.

by neverAcquiesce on Apr 15, 2013 | 10:01 PM reply rec (3)

and...

Thanks, Obama.

by KyroJudo on Apr 15, 2013 | 10:04 PM reply rec (7)

and...

[On why Nikki got a boob job]

[Cena] said he couldn't see them.

by neverAcquiesce on Apr 15, 2013 | 10:46 PM up reply rec (10)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Monday, April 15" thread:

Something about cSs just seems... I dunno, tainted lately.

by ReverendKain on Apr 15, 2013 | 12:34 PM up reply rec (6)

I see all these dark rectangles and think they are big black Atari-style penises

CJ's is the smallest, of course.

by Kanenite on Apr 15, 2013 | 1:59 PM up reply rec (5)

You must drive a Hummer, huh?

by Kanenite on Apr 15, 2013 | 2:40 PM up reply rec (5)

The blackest thing CJ's ever done is listening to NPR

with the bass up.

by Kanenite on Apr 15, 2013 | 3:26 PM up reply rec (6)

From the "Report: Brock Lesnar vs. Triple H will be the main event at WWE Extreme Rules 2013" thread:

Same old shit! Same old shit! Same old shit! Same old shit!

by N.P.C.C. on Apr 15, 2013 | 4:48 PM reply rec (12)

and from the same thread...

Brock goes over I think

The WWE may be dumb, but they aren't that dumb...

Actually they may be that dumb.

by Curtain Jerker on Apr 15, 2013 | 4:59 PM reply rec (5)

and...

one more stipulation

Bret Hart as special guest referee

by Flyingpigs on Apr 15, 2013 | 6:15 PM reply rec (6)

From the "Rumor Roundup for Tuesday, April 16: John Cena vs. Ryback, Batista return, and more!" thread:

Also, please don't bring back Kelly [Kelly].

That won't help anything.

by Kanenite on Apr 16, 2013 | 8:39 AM reply rec (9)

and from the same thread...

Wrong

Sorry, but I don't see WWE giving up on the Divas division entirely. A couple of reasons:

a) It's a publicly traded corporation that is incredibly image conscious and attempts to be family friendly and diverse. That means keeping a title belt that has produced Hall of Famers who the company continues to market.
b) HHH and Steph have little girls. Don't think that doesn't matter.

The truth is that there are PLENTY of female wrestlers who can flat out go. The division has been strong before and could easily be again with just a little attention paid to it. FIt Finlay taught one generation, and he can teach another. Sara Del Ray can do more than just train. Kharma will probably return at some point.

Women's pro wrestling is Americana. They don't need sexed up crap just to sell a feud.

by GuyinNY on Apr 16, 2013 | 12:07 PM up reply rec (5)

From the "CSSGTTT Final Four Match: (1) Dudley Boyz vs. (3) Brainbusters" thread:

Vote - Brainbusters

Can we please have an actual tag team with actual tag team psychology win this thing? I don't know if the results are in yet but it looks like the Ultimate Warrior of tag teams took out the Harts yesterday and that's just sad. Sure, they are the Hulk Hogan of tag teams, which is exactly why they shouldn't win. By the similar logic, the Dudleys were just another spot-fest squad. The Brainbusters are the last hope for wrestling to win this tournament.

They were two of the greatest stable ever with the greatest manager ever. Even Joe "Animal" Laurinaitis wrote in his book that both the Harts and Busters were far superior in wrestling 101 to the Road Warriors and made them look good. He also said this about the Midnight Express and Freebirds whom we also failed to give the proper not to over LOD. Don't get me wrong. I'm a lifelong fan but the reality is they just weren't as talented as the results of this apparent popularity contest are implying.

Let's go ppl. Wrestling. Not who looked the coolest or was most popular or im this case had to throw people through tables every night to get over.

by SpaceMountain on Apr 16, 2013 | 9:19 AM rec (6)

and from the same thread...

Vote - Dudleys

21 time champs between ECW/TNA/WWE, fought all over the world, they have gotten over as heels or faces. They have been a team much longer (13 years-ish), isn't that a "real tag team"? Brainbusters are the better wrestlers, but that alone isn't enough. Also as someone else mentioned, Road Warriors will mush The Brainbusters in the finals, Dudleyz may put up more of a fight.

by Doors Hate MMA Fighters on Apr 16, 2013 | 9:41 AM rec (5)

and...

People going out of their way to put down someone's vote is beyond lame.

it just really rubs me the wrong one when someone infers they are a "better" wrestling fan because they voted one way over another. Bring up that wrestling is actually fake to defend your vote deserves scorn every time.

by BrooklynBrawler4Life on Apr 16, 2013 | 4:52 PM up rec (9)

and...

My take

There seems to be some condescension in the comments that start off with, "it's a shame people don't understand..." and "I don't vote for gimmicks..." It isn't necessarily you, but there are some on here who seem to assume that they are "better" wrestling fans because they watch wrestling for skill and technique over those that view it for entertainment. I personally watch for both reasons, but I don't think that one is a better reason than the other. These things are supposed to be fun, and I've read multiple posts from people bashing others because the tag team they wanted to win lost.

by The Mad Hopper on Apr 16, 2013 | 9:50 PM up rec (7)

From the "How WWE tried to kill 'Fandangoing,' or this is why we can't have nice things" thread:

Three at most.

My girlfriend makes more noise in bed than that crowd did last night

(I don't have a girlfriend)

by Simark on Apr 16, 2013 | 4:42 PM up reply rec (8)

and from the same thread...

Once in a lifetime crowd...

So does that mean we'll get that crowd every year around WrestleMania time?

by Kanenite on Apr 16, 2013 | 6:45 PM up reply rec (11)

From the "WWE Extreme Rules 2013 match card adds Dolph Ziggler vs. Jack Swagger vs. Alberto Del Rio" thread:

If Dolph Ziggler doesn't win

I SWEAR TO GOD I'll make a flippant comment on this site and keep watchin.

MARK MY WORDS!!!!

by Simark on Apr 16, 2013 | 9:16 PM reply rec (6)

From the "CSSGTTT Final: (1) Road Warriors vs. (1) Dudley Boyz" thread:

Vote - Warriors

Wow. I can't believe so many are so mesmerized by tables and chairs. Even Devon and Bubba Ray would vote Warriors here. The Road Warriors are tag team wrestling. Stone cold fact.

by Pete Bondurant on Apr 17, 2013 | 10:14 AM rec (9)

and from the same thread...

Vote - Warriors

I voted against them a bunch and was hoping a more in-ring/psychological team would be here at the end but I think the truth is (whether I like it or not) that the Road Warriors are the greatest tag team of all time. The impact they had on the wrestling industry when they came about and throughout their career is undeniably several times more significant than the Dudleys. They flat out drew money. I don't think nearly as many fans paid to see the Dudleys as the Warriors. The Road Warriors were headliners their whole career barring the twilight of their career when Hawk played an exaggeration of his party animal self. Everything from the face paint, entrance music, the shoulder pads, the doomsday device and the Road Warrior "pop" is what makes them the most polarizing and imitated team in history. Demolition, Sting, The Ultimate Warrior, The Powers of Pain...that whole Mad Max anti-hero concept can be traced to the Road Warriors. What they lack in actual wrestling skill and versatility they make up for in their sheer badassness. I don't even know how the Dudley's even made it this far to be honest.

by SpaceMountain on Apr 17, 2013 | 12:34 PM rec (6)

and...

Vote - Road Warriors

I still kick myself for forgetting to cast a vote for the British Bulldogs against the Dudleys, not going to make that mistake today.

The Road Warriors are the most important tag team in wrestling history. They revolutionized the concept and were the only performers who could compete with Hogan and Andre for drawing power in the 80s. They won championships in the three biggest promotions (AWA, NWA, and WWF) and were in some of the most memorable matches and feuds of the 80s & 90s.

I can understand voting for the Dudley's if you're only familiar with the LOD from their WWE days, but if you remember seeing them walk out to Black Sabbath's "Iron Man" to face the Fabulous Freebirds for the AWA Tag Team Championship, you'd vote Road Warriors.

by Thomas Nash on Apr 17, 2013 | 1:48 PM rec (8)

From the "On This Date in WCW History (Apr.17): Hulk Hogan throws Billy Kidman into a dumpster" thread:

I'm new here

Is there such a thing as an "anti-rec"?

by Gregger on Apr 17, 2013 | 8:35 AM up reply rec (11)

From the "WrestleMania 29 PPV buyrate may be much lower than expected" thread:

Good

They deserve a lower buy rate after the lack of anything interesting happening leading up to and mostly at WM 29 itself.

by Kanenite on Apr 17, 2013 | 4:15 PM reply rec (10)

From the "Rumor Roundup for Thursday, April 18" thread:

It's not the matches that are so disappointing

It's the feuds themselves. They go like this.

Cena- salutes crowd, gives lame promo
Heel- interrupts- calls Cena out for always winning/being Cena, promises to put an end to Cena
Cena- gives ridiculous or over the top promo, calls heel a name/dumps something on him
Heel- Uses trick stipulation/unexpected interference to defeat Cena at PPV #1
Cena- Shoulder Block, Shoulder Block, duck, powerbomb-5 knuckle shuffle- Attitude Adjustment at PPV #2/RAW go home show
Heel- Goes to Saturday Morning Slam

I'd just like to see some variety, some development, something different. Heck, when was the last time John Cena ate a pin from something other than the WMD?

by Wellington's Wellingtons on Apr 18, 2013 | 3:07 PM up reply rec (8)

From the "Precap to the April 18, 2013 episode of TNA Impact, or TNA, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship" thread:

WCW did something poorly in the past?

Hell yes, TNA wants to try its hand at it!

by knastymike on Apr 18, 2013 | 2:53 PM up reply rec (3)

From the "WWE NXT results and reactions from April 17: That's Emma-tainment" thread:

"no man on two feet"

WYATT.

GOWEN.

WRESTLEMANIA XXX.

by ReverendKain on Apr 18, 2013 | 1:39 PM reply rec (6)

From the "Editable comments are now live" thread:

Just think of it like the old countdown for Jericho's entrances.

When it goes off, sing "BREAK THE WALL DOWN!"

by Shadowbird on Apr 18, 2013 | 2:29 PM up reply rec (9)

and from the same thread...

*cool

by J Theory on Apr 18, 2013 | 2:24 PM up reply rec (6)

I will become the man of 1004 edits.

First edit: Armbar.

by StrongStyle81 on Apr 18, 2013 | 2:54 PM reply rec (5)

#820...SPACE BAR!

by Eugene Saxe on Apr 18, 2013 | 2:55 PM up reply rec (14)

From the "Rumor Roundup for Friday, April 19: Shawn Michaels, Mick Foley, and more!" thread:

Well of course, Foley is retired

He beat Jericho, what else is there to do?

by Bad-Horse on Apr 19, 2013 | 8:44 AM reply rec (12)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Friday, April 19, 2013" thread:

I can't pass judgment on anyone else's vengeance

but torturing a guy just puts you in the same neighborhood as that fucker. Don't descend down to his level.

by Curtain Jerker on Apr 19, 2013 | 9:48 AM up reply rec (8)

and from the same thread...

Yes, it's wrong

This is the United States and, despite our past mistakes, torture is both unconstitutional, and antithetical to whom we are as a nation.

by GuyinNY on Apr 19, 2013 | 11:13 AM up reply rec (9)

and...

http://imgur.com/j8bVVXH.jpg

"Stop tweeting dick pics to me, @rancho_king33"

by vfn on Apr 19, 2013 | 12:04 PM up reply rec (12)

and...

"What is this 'Cageside Seats,' and why are they talking about my thighs?"

by Bish Bash Falls on Apr 19, 2013 | 12:34 PM up reply rec (4)

From the "Review of "She-Hulk XXX" - Part One" thread:

Ugh

I can't believe they would screw up such basic characters and concepts- Super Horny Naked Lawyer Man has never been introduced to mainstream Marvel continuity. He exists solely on Earth-6969, based on his appearances in What If...? 131 and 132, "What If... The Beyonder Was Really Interested in Human Mating Rituals?" and "What If... Conan Had a Boner in the Present Day?", and in those stories it's made perfectly clear that he has no interest in battling his fellow lawyers, let alone a pre-She-Hulk Jennifer Walters!

I don't get it, if you wanna make a Super Horny Naked Lawyer Man movie, make a Super Horny Naked Lawyer Man movie! Don't shoe-horn him into uncomfortable places he doesn't belong in the hopes of getting another few eyes on the screen.

by ReverendKain on Apr 18, 2013 | 4:21 PM reply rec (5)

and from the same thread...

Fucking Miz

by Kanenite on Apr 18, 2013 | 4:23 PM up reply rec (12)

From the "Stephanie McMahon: Triple H 'almost defined the Attitude Era'" thread:

contacted Bret Hart

And for HHH being the definition of the attitude era he gives it 4/10
Scott Steiner says he's 141 2/3 percent sure it's someone else.

by Flyingpigs on Apr 19, 2013 | 4:42 PM reply rec (10)

and from the same thread...

The only thing Triple H ever defined was the art of the burial.

by StrongStyle81 on Apr 19, 2013 | 4:53 PM reply rec (9)

and...

Wait...I thought X-Pac defined the Attitude Era...

by IKH5150 on Apr 20, 2013 | 2:05 AM reply rec (5)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Saturday, April 20, 2013" thread:

Ugh...woke up in Rex's bed today. So awkward. How long do I wait until I tell him to stop Fandangoing on top of me?

by Kanenite on Apr 20, 2013 | 11:35 AM reply rec (12)

and from the same thread...

It actually sounds like you were having trouble with the D.

Just sayin'

by vfn on Apr 20, 2013 | 2:58 PM up reply rec (7)

From the "Is Zack Ryder finally changing gimmicks? (Video)" thread:

Dude needs to

shave his head, grow a beard and start eye gouging and throat stomping bitches.

by Teamweorf on Apr 21, 2013 | 1:45 PM reply rec (5)

and also from the same thread...

WHAT'S JACK DRIVER DOING IN THE IMPACT ZONE?

by 49erLou on Apr 21, 2013 | 2:24 PM up reply rec (4)

and...

Hold on a minute, let's see how his math is.

by keyboard punk on Apr 21, 2013 | 6:42 PM up reply rec (7)

From the "Mark Coleman wanted to pick a fight with CM Punk at UFC's The Ultimate Fighter 17 Finale" thread:

I think what’s really pissing him off is more people give a fuck about Lita than they do about him

by Saint Santos on Apr 21, 2013 | 3:22 PM up reply rec (5)

From the "Review of "She-Hulk XXX" - Part Four" thread:

What I'm taking away from this is that it is anatomically possible to carry Chyna like a bowling ball.

by keyboard punk on Apr 21, 2013 | 2:50 PM reply rec (4)

From the "Rumor Roundup for Monday, April 22: CM Punk injury and return updates, European tour, and more!" thread:

If Creative can't find things for someone like Cesaro to do

maybe they should try their luck at finding a better job.

by ShatterHand on Apr 22, 2013 | 7:13 AM reply rec (24)

and also from the same thread...

Yea I've got one. Have him dominate everyone who challenges for his title.

by Jake Nazar on Apr 22, 2013 | 7:37 AM up reply rec (13)

and...

When he treated Miz like a rag doll

I thought that would be the signifier of a monster heel run. Obviously not. WWE creative threw away a golden opportunity off the back of that. Don’t think I’ll ever forget or tire of watching Miz repeatedly swung headfirst into the barracade.

by Boney Hulk on Apr 22, 2013 | 9:07 AM up reply rec (9)

and...

Too bad [Rosa Mendes] doesn't work for TNA.

She could have main evented a PPV.

by UnmitigatedDisaster on Apr 22, 2013 | 12:16 PM up reply rec (12)

and...

Jesus Christ, that stuff about Cesaro.

“Well, we just don’t have a place for you at the moment, Antonio. We’re just too busy getting fucking RYBACK in the co-main event of the next PPV. Now go out there and job to Miz like a World Heavyweight Champ.”

Jesus Christ, it shouldn’t matter if they have an idea for guys like Cesaro. Just book him in lots of matches against faces who don’t matter, and have him win all of them until you figure out what to do with him.

This is a guy who could’ve headlined ER and Payback by now, but never mind that shit, here’s fuckingRYBACK.

by *Asterisk* on Apr 22, 2013 | 12:54 PM reply rec (12)

and...

Ryback

His music gets a big pop. Fans chant along with his catchphrase, they pop for the Meathook clothesline, and they always pop big for the Shellshock. Ryback taps into the pro wrestling fan id, just the way Warrior, Goldberg, Batista and even Lashley did.

The trouble is precisely that he was mishandled for the last several months, and that continues with putting him in there with Cena now. It’s like I said above: WWE has backed the Ryback character into a corner. If they want the gimmick to work, they have to give him the title. Because I want NEW AND FRESH main eventers, I want Ryback to hold the gold because I think a title win (however rushed) would probably help do that.

by GuyinNY on Apr 22, 2013 | 1:47 PM up reply rec (7)

From the "WWE Raw results and live blog for April 22: Undertaker in London" thread:

the shield is out for justice

for what taker did to MAVEN at the 2002 royal rumble

by manbearpig74 on Apr 22, 2013 | 8:45 PM reply rec (3)

and also from the same thread...

Maybe Shield wants revenge for their father

Big Boss Man?

by ShatterHand on Apr 22, 2013 | 8:48 PM up reply rec (3)

and...

"Hey Bryan, we want you to do some stupid comedy stuff."

“No problem. I will be the best there has ever been at stupid comedy stuff. Because I can only do things better than anyone else.”

by dustbusta on Apr 22, 2013 | 9:24 PM reply rec (3)

and...

What version of Raw are you watching that Steve Blackman's on TV?

by ReverendKain on Apr 22, 2013 | 9:40 PM up reply rec (7)

and...

So...JBL just mentioned the two teams in the finals of the tournament.

JBL reads cSs.

by TheMasterGeek on Apr 22, 2013 | 9:56 PM reply rec (3)

From the "Cageside Seats Greatest Finisher Tournament: The Field of 64" thread:

Sure, [The Finger Poke of Doom] was only used once,

but it finished the largest promotion in the world.

by UnmitigatedDisaster on Apr 22, 2013 | 9:36 AM up reply rec (16)

and also from the same thread...

oh come on, give some credit to Tony Schiavone

put some butts in the seats

by Bad-Horse on Apr 22, 2013 | 9:58 AM up reply rec (4)

and...

It's the only move

that Kevin Nash has ever sold correctly.

by phlash74 on Apr 22, 2013 | 11:32 AM up reply rec (8)

and...

First Round

So, having seen Big Show and Owen Freakin’ Hart almost go over Hogan in a tourney for the GOAT, I put nothing past this board.

Then again, if the finger poke wins, the Brooke might actually tweet about it. Why? Because when I think of Hulk Hogan and finger poking, I think of Brooke.

by GuyinNY on Apr 22, 2013 | 10:31 AM up reply rec (9)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Monday, April 22, 2013" thread:

Sorry Dolph, but your WHC now belongs to the Brock lesnar/HHH feud.

by Kanenite on Apr 22, 2013 | 12:06 PM up reply rec (4)

and also from the same thread...

Why I hate bleacher report in a nutshell...(and hopefully my grammar is correct here)

Their main story is “Explaining to Fans Why Dolph Ziggler is Suppose to Lose Right Now”.

Supposed. It should be supposed you asshats.

Also, I know that BR is awful but they don’t have viruses like half the goddamn wrestling sites you can visit. This fine establishment not included.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 22, 2013 | 1:58 PM reply rec (6)

From the "The Rock on wrestling his last match, Brock Lesnar plans, and panic at Raw after WrestleMania 29" thread:

Dolph Ziggler vs Amy Schumer

would be waaaaaaay more athletic than Brock vs Rock.

by Kanenite on Apr 22, 2013 | 2:32 PM reply rec (13)

From the "WWE announces new Divas reality show to air on E!" thread:

Total Divas?

That’s so totally NOT Raven.

by knastymike on Apr 22, 2013 | 2:52 PM reply rec (5)

and also from the same thread...

I wish this

was on HBO and they added ‘After Dark’ to the title. If you know what I mean.

by TheCrow4Life on Apr 22, 2013 | 2:52 PM reply rec (9)

From the "WWE Extreme Rules 2013 match card: John Cena vs. Ryback official" thread:

Soooooo

Mark Henry wins at wrestlemania, but cant have a title shot because the rock has a rematch clause. Ryback loses, and gets to face john Cean. #WWELogic

by mrsocko on Apr 22, 2013 | 3:29 PM reply rec (6)

From the "Rosa Mendes sent home from WWE European Tour" thread:

Maybe she needs a good spanking

My hand and lap are always at the ready.

by Eugene Saxe on Apr 22, 2013 | 5:04 PM reply rec (5)

and also from the same thread...

Maybe they sent her home because she calls her fans #Mendesluverz

I’d find that an acceptable enough reason.

by KDidz on Apr 22, 2013 | 6:49 PM reply rec (4)

From the "Rumor Roundup for Tuesday, April 23: The Shield, Zack Ryder, Stone Cold, and more!" thread:

I was thinking about the midcard titles and came to the conclusion

that Heath Slater should have one.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 23, 2013 | 10:20 AM up reply rec (5)

From the "WWE Raw results and reactions from last night (April 22): Lights out in London" thread:

That Team Taker/Shield match was sooooooo great.

Easily in the same class as Cena/Punk in Dallas, and possibly the best Shield match yet, including their TLC match.

In one match, Rollins convinced me he might be the second best worker on the roster, and easily the best seller. Obviously a large part of that is, unlike Ziggler, Rollins isn’t booked like a jobber, but an even larger part is that everything Rollins does looks amazing.

I love the Shield, and in a way I can picture them as all time favorites. Everything about them completely separates them from the rest of the roster, from the camcorder promos, to their combat jackets, to entering through the crowd, to their awesome team moves, to neither man looking like a feeder guy, to their actual winning of matches, to each guy being under thirty and still having more ability than all but three full timers on the roster. They’ve basically been doing the same thing for six months, and I already can’t wait to see what happens with the next twenty years of each guy’s career.

by *Asterisk* on Apr 23, 2013 | 8:22 AM reply rec (13)

and also from the same thread...

Sadly the Shield got put over in a way that most people cannot in today’s WWE w/ a huge win over Taker, then w/i 30 mins got buried by Subpar Cena. How does that work? You have your best & worst day in the span of one Raw.

Usually, I’m the guy who says something like this, but seriously, this was not a burial by any stretch of the imagination. It’s fine for faces to run off the heels if the heels aren’t losing their matches.

by *Asterisk* on Apr 23, 2013 | 9:10 AM up reply rec (10)

and...

yeah cause I prefer it when my wrestlers dont do anything

that makes for some awesome entertainment

by Simark on Apr 23, 2013 | 9:51 AM up reply rec (17)

and...

Totally disagree...

I think they should add so many members they eventually split into two groups, then feud with each other. It would be toooo sweeeeeet!

by King Oskar on Apr 23, 2013 | 9:57 AM up reply rec (11)

and...

No, no

The Shield and The Sword.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 23, 2013 | 10:04 AM up reply rec (7)

and...

I prefer

The Sworrd

by King Oskar on Apr 23, 2013 | 10:10 AM up reply rec (4)

and...

Everything Chris Jericho does is great.

I thought we all agreed to that at the IWC summit of 2011?

by TMadeBurner on Apr 23, 2013 | 2:19 PM up reply rec (9)

From the "Cageside Seats Greatest Finisher Tournament First Round Match-Ups Announced" thread:

HA....HOGAN HAS TO JOB IN THE FIRST ROUND REGARDLESS

The IWC wins…..
by DFreshMMA on Apr 23, 2013 | 9:35 AM reply rec (8)

and also from the same thread...

I'm pretty sure Swagger got all foreign objects deported.

by keyboard punk on Apr 23, 2013 | 9:57 PM up reply rec (5)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Tuesday, April 23, 2013" thread:

"Hey Cesaro....go Swiss Death someone, hold the yodelling..."

there’s a start

by DFreshMMA on Apr 23, 2013 | 10:00 AM up reply rec (4)

and also from the same thread...

"I can't help it, I just love the kids!"

by ReverendKain on Apr 23, 2013 | 11:51 AM up reply rec (7)

and...

joliemadchen, here are my guesses as to what the superplex falling object might be

Ziggler wrestled the entire match wearing a band around his left wrist tape, as seen here:
http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/7348/zigglypuff1.png

Here is a (crappy) picture of the fallen object in question, after the superplex. It’s the small hunk of crap on the mat between Ziggler and Jericho:
http://img405.imageshack.us/img405/9707/zigglypuff5.png

It looks to me like it is pretty similar to the band Ziggler has around his left wrist tape. However, that band on his left wrist was still located in the same spot even after the superplex. So it wasn’t that specific band.

Did Dolph carry/wear other bands on him when he wrestled? I can’t really say for sure but here are a few more low quality pics of things that may either be alternate bands or perhaps just shadowy blobs of nothing.

Look at the dark spots at the very bottom of both of Ziggler’s wrist tapes in these pictures. Are these shadows? Or are they some kind of band that he is wearing?
http://img221.imageshack.us/img221/4513/zigglypuff2.png
http://img802.imageshack.us/img802/5326/zigglypuff3.png
http://img845.imageshack.us/img845/4405/zigglypuff4.png

I can’t really tell. Here is a picture after the superplex. Is there a difference between the dark object at base of the left and right wrist tapes now? Are these just shadows? Or is it possible that the base of the right wrist tape has some kind of dark band under it while the base of the left wrist tape is now missing it?
http://img211.imageshack.us/img211/8343/zigglypuff6.png

Finally, if you go and look back at picture 1 at Ziggler’s left hand, there is actually a dark smudge just above the tape, on Ziggler’s hand. Is that just a shadow? Or did he have some kind of band around his hand that got sweaty and loosened up and fell off after the superplex?

And finally, look back at picture 5. Damn, that ass.

So I guess I just wasted a ton of words to say that I don’t really know what the hell it is. It seems to be some kind of band, and I’m fairly sure it came from the left side of Ziggler’s body. But unfortunately I am lost in a (Barrett) barrage of shadows and dark objects that might just be playing tricks on my eyes.

by Kanenite on Apr 23, 2013 | 11:20 AM reply rec (5)

and...

for your next mystery on Dolph....

[Photo]

by DFreshMMA on Apr 23, 2013 | 11:37 AM up reply rec (5)

and...

Did Lee Harvey Oswald act alone?

Of course not. Fucking Miz.

by Kanenite on Apr 23, 2013 | 11:33 AM up reply rec (5)

and...

Every minute or so

two superkicks sync up.

It’s Sweet Chinception.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 23, 2013 | 8:53 PM up reply rec (3)

and...

so was this just a test to see if we would go heel and trash talk all you guys for a few days?

by Kanenite on Apr 24, 2013 | 12:09 AM up reply rec (3)

and...

(btw I'm very happy to see you [J.M. Williams] and CJ back)

by Kanenite on Apr 24, 2013 | 12:09 AM up reply rec (3)

and...

They developed a better story than Creative has for most of the roster.

Figures.

by Blueblob4life on Apr 24, 2013 | 12:36 AM up reply rec (3)

and...

Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!!!!!!

Alright. Rolling back over to try and get some sleep. I look forward to celebrating this properly soon!

Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!

by TheRojas on Apr 24, 2013 | 12:09 AM up reply rec (3)

and...

Glad to have you back

I was frightened about the prospect of a tournament where one of these schmucks would end up having to draw the bracket… It’d probably have ended up in crayon.

by ReverendKain on Apr 24, 2013 | 12:09 AM up reply rec (3)

and...

Yippee!!

First CJ, then June!
The first 22 seconds are most important.

by Bish Bash Falls on Apr 24, 2013 | 12:11 AM up reply rec (3)

and...

BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

by Sonnens Political Adviser on Apr 24, 2013 | 1:33 AM up reply rec (2)

and...

or maybe

this could be the cSs version of Fake Razor and Fake Diesel!

by Kanenite on Apr 24, 2013 | 1:55 AM up reply rec (4)

From the "The Notorious Eddie Mac Presents: WWE Ruins Everything (Part 1)" thread:

If you are just flat out insulting people for having a difference of opinion

you may be too invested in Cena. I’d hate to know what would happen if someone dared criticise the Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla? ;)

by Boney Hulk on Apr 24, 2013 | 5:16 PM up reply rec (6)

and also from the same thread...

We were awesome because we entertained ourself for a 1/2 period where no one gave a shit, because the WWE was force feeding two shitty performers that no one gave two fucks about

As fans, we care. We care much, much more than the generic fair-weather fans, which is why we don’t like when the aforementioned shit gets pumped out and is passed off as if it’s good (which it’s not).

If the performers didn’t disrespect us, we wouldn’t troll their crapworthy performance.

by Steve Sypa on Apr 25, 2013 | 12:28 PM up replyrec (3)

and...

"Why even watch it if all you do is complain"- The point is that thats not all we do.

We mark out like crazy when they do something right. We praise them to the skies when they create an intricate storyline or a well-sketched out character. By the same token, we also criticize them when they do something wrong.

by Jerichoholic_21 on Apr 24, 2013 | 7:20 AM up reply rec (3)

and...

Disagree with you on the bryan part.

The way they treated Bryan in NXT actually got him over. They took an indy darling with little to no exposure in the mainstream and got him super over by first pairing him up with the Miz who has basically been Wrestling’s Anti-Christ since he debuted, the face-heel dynamic between them really worked and helped him get over. Also, the constant burials by WWE Management and Michael Cole really established him as a sympathetic babyface. Plus he got to show off his mic skills in the segments with Cole. SO this was actually extremely beneficial for him. IT was genuis actually the way they took the tendency of people to always criticize the big guy or the mainstream (in this case the WWE) in favour of the lesser known underdog (Bryan).

by Jerichoholic_21 on Apr 23, 2013 | 2:49 PM reply rec (7)

and...

And VKM is why fans can't have anything nice.

Everybody screws up from time to time, sometimes we even screw up big time. What sets Vince apart from the average, or even below-average mook is that he consistently screws up on purpose and in such easily avoidable ways. And he does so because he subconsciously wants to screw up the wrestling product.

Vince basically hates the wrestling business, which is why he has flushed tens (hundreds by this point?) of millions of dollars on crap like Miz movies and the XFL. We will not mention the WBF at length. Blurgh. He hates to be thought of as what he really is – a two-bit carny who monopolized a business where he can make tons of cash. But a sleazy huckster is what Vince is at his core, deep down he knows it, and that fact eats at him like an acid drip. Which is why he’s blown so much money in a pre-doomed effort to become “respectable” in the larger media world. Which he will never, EVARRRRRR © Chris Jericho be. He knows he’s going to fail but he does it anyway out of pure self-loathing. I imagine this pathetic specimen looking at himself in the mirror and screaming “I am NOT a two-bit carny!! I am a billionaire!! I am a LEGITIMATEmedia mogul!! I AM ! I AM!!! I AM!!!” No, Vince, you’re not. And you never will be. And you can’t accept it and that is why you are a self-destructive fool.

All he really has is wrestling, and he hates the wrestling business with every fiber of his being. The image of “pro wrestling” in traditional popular culture stands in absolute opposition to what McMahon thinks of himself as being. What could reflect his pathetic desire for mainstream acceptance than flushing more tens of millions down the laughable shitpot of his wife’s ludicrous Senate campaigns. Vince loathes himself and the business that has been his cash cow on a level so deep and pathological that a platoon of psychiatrists would need years to explain it. Which is ultimately why everything he has touched has turned, at least aesthetically speaking, to dogshit for the last ten years.

Those campaigns explain the dumbing-down of the product even more for the “PG Era” a/k/a the E’s most recent and lengthy Dork Age. Pro wrestling is by its nature a somewhat sleazy guilty pleasure. But when it’s well done it is a fun and compelling form of entertainment. A bit of sleaze is necessary for it to beentertaining.

That’s enough for now except to say that

1. SuperCena’s sell-by date passed about three years ago. But because Cena is seen as somewhat respectable in mainstream media for the same Mary Sue reasons we smarks loathe him, he will never, ever, change.

2.. Creative’s job is to CREATE. If time and again they cannot come up with programs for tens of wrestlers, it is CREATIVE that should be fired, not the performers. A group of 20 older smark fans having Skype meetings (chaired by Paul Heyman) three times a week could come up with enough plausible ideas to keep three promotions going. Let a real wrestling booker on the order of a Heyman or Cornette edit the material and farm it out to the most talented idea people for a final polish. Would it all work? No. But one hell of a lot more of it would work than the pathetic swill that comes out of the office holding Steph’s monkeys and typewriters.

by Hifismark on Apr 24, 2013 | 5:04 AM reply rec (13)

From the "Video: Great Khali sings the hits" thread:

Khali, it's not the sexy that hurts, it's your knees, dude.

by ReverendKain on Apr 23, 2013 | 4:31 PM reply rec (3) flag

From the "Breathe into your wallet" thread:

[On the Fandango ringtone]

It will come out...when you spell his name right.

by DFreshMMA on Apr 24, 2013 | 8:08 AM up reply rec (7)

From the "WWE Raw ratings rise for Undertaker's return on April 22 in London" thread:

Danial Bryan and Seth Rollins were in RAW's highest rated segment.

Even I’m happy hearing that.

by *Asterisk* on Apr 23, 2013 | 6:17 PM reply rec (5)

From the "WWE Main Event results and live blog for April 24: Mark Henry runs the gauntlet" thread:

Mark Henry actually built up an immunity to cobra venom by taking small doses of it every day for years now.

by ReverendKain on Apr 24, 2013 | 8:24 PM reply rec (2)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Wednesday, April 24, 2013" thread:

Indeed [Dusty Rhodes] was [supposed to be President].

People felt he couldn’t deliver on his platform, though. He promised us wining and dining with kings and queens, but nobody ever saw him do anything but sleep in alleys and eat pork and beans. Plus the sausage lobby was turned off when he went on that whole rant about how cold-blooded they were. That campaign was risky business, daddy.

by ReverendKain on Apr 24, 2013 | 11:44 AM up reply rec (8)

and also from the same thread...

Here's my ECW TV moment in the background

[Image]

There’s a black arrow in the upper left corner of the picture. My head is to the right of that arrow tip. My younger sister is to the right of me, probably holding a camera in front of her face. My older sister is standing to the right of her, in a mostly black Tommy Dreamer T-shirt. And some dude I don’t know is to the right of her is wearing a “31” Jersey. I personally prefer the number 7, but whatever.

by Kanenite on Apr 24, 2013 | 3:08 PM up reply rec (4)

From the "WWE names the 50 greatest championship matches in history" thread:

I stopped reading when Miz was on the list.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 24, 2013 | 1:41 PM reply rec (9) flag

and also from the same thread...

1. Bret Hart vs. Shawn Michaels, WrestleMania 12

I’m sorry, I thought this was top 50 Greatest Chmpionship Matches, Not Top 50 Ways To Fall Asleep…

by IKH5150 on Apr 24, 2013 | 1:52 PM reply rec (3) flag

and...

They don't pretend Benoit never existed.

They’ve just completely ix-nayed any promotion of him by the company because he murdered his family due to taking too many bumps to the head. Which is the absolute right thing to do, and anyone who thinks otherwise has no perspective.

by *Asterisk* on Apr 24, 2013 | 3:32 PM up reply rec (3) flag

and...

I'd probably go with Punk vs Cena from MITB for #1

by Kanenite on Apr 24, 2013 | 3:44 PM reply rec (6) flag

From the "The Rock responds to Michael Bay comments" thread:

Fuck Michael Bay.

by Ditkavsworld on Apr 24, 2013 | 4:57 PM reply rec (27)

and also from the same thread...

Fuck Michael Bay

Signed, Transformers fans

by ultmma on Apr 24, 2013 | 5:54 PM up reply rec (17)

and...

Fuck Michael Bay

Signed anyone with eyes

by Worldisart on Apr 24, 2013 | 7:04 PM up reply rec (14)

and...

Fuck Michael Bay

Just looking for easy recs

by Cole_Miner on Apr 24, 2013 | 8:16 PM up reply rec (13)

and...

Fuck Michael Bay

For not getting you the easy recs you were looking for.

by The Dayman on Apr 24, 2013 | 9:31 PM up reply rec (12)

and...

I was going to come on to bash Michael Bay

But looks like that was already taken care of.

by KDidz on Apr 24, 2013 | 10:22 PM up reply rec (9)

and...

"Grow up," says the man who is directing Transformers 4.

by bensix on Apr 24, 2013 | 8:10 PM reply rec (15)

and...

also

Fuck Michael Bay >thumbs up<

by 49erLou on Apr 25, 2013 | 1:29 AM up reply rec (6)

and...

"End of an Act"

I miss you more than Michael Bay missed the mark
When he made Pearl Harbor
I miss you more than that movie missed the point
And that’s an awful lot girl
And now, now you’ve gone away
And all I’m trying to say
Is Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you

I need you like Ben Affleck needs acting school
He was terrible in that film
I need you like Cuba Gooding needed a bigger part
He’s way better then Ben Affleck
And now all I can think about is your smile
And that shitty movie too
Pearl Harbor sucked and I miss you

Why does Michael Bay get to keep on making movies?
I guess Pearl Harbor sucked
Just a little bit more than I miss you

by phlash74 on Apr 25, 2013 | 1:55 AM reply rec (4)

From the "WWE stars advocate Macho Man Randy Savage for Hall of Fame class 2014" thread:

enough with the legitimization of the HOF already. Didn't people already do all this bullshit with Bruno?

One less inductee will not deligitimize the HOF. Sure, it would be a significant omission, but theHOF is legit enough without Savage.

by Jerichoholic_21 on Apr 24, 2013 | 5:52 PM up reply rec (7)

and. also from the same thread...

Since the Macho Man inducted Stephanie into the Hall of Pain

does that mean she’ll induct him into the Hall of Fame?

by BrooklynBrawler4Life on Apr 24, 2013 | 5:58 PM reply rec (7)

From the "WWE Main Event results and reactions for Wed., April 24: The giant walks away" thread

Wait a second...

…Thomas Paine was born in England and had the good sense to leave for America?

Alberto del Rio was born in Mexico and had the good sense to leave for America. So why is one great and the other bad?

For that matter, back in the day Zeb/Swagger were pissed at Wade Barrett, WHO DID THE EXACT SAMETHING THOMAS PAINE DID!!!!

by Curtain Jerker on Apr 25, 2013 | 9:39 AM reply rec (3)

and also from the same thread...

They need to bring back Mr. Main Event to up the grade.

Cesaro, where are you?

by toke08 on Apr 25, 2013 | 12:40 PM reply rec (4)

and...

The problem was Khali

If you had sent out anyone else for #4, it might have worked. Orton, Sheamus, the Shield, any one of those could force Henry to look like the bully who will turn tail when the going gets tough and make him look strong.

But Khali? Dammit. Just, dammit.

by Flashking on Apr 25, 2013 | 1:02 PM reply rec (4)

and...

Gotta protect that young up-and-comer Khali.

by *Asterisk* on Apr 25, 2013 | 2:07 PM reply rec (3)

From the "Rumor Roundup for Thursday, April 25: Smackdown, WWE Network, Divas, and more!" thread:

Like where you're going with this

Ziggler could say he’s just to perfect, Langston too strong, and aj too beautiful to be the product of evolution. They could only be the result of….Intelligent Design.

by Primus Flavius on Apr 25, 2013 | 8:33 AM up reply rec (13)

From the "Daily Open Thread for Thursday, April 25, 2013" thread:

WHERE'S MY DAMN NXT POST, RECAP MONKEY!?!

C’mooooonnnnn I heard there was Jericho and Wyatt in a promo battle!!

by TMadeBurner on Apr 25, 2013 | 10:22 AM up reply rec (4)

and also from the same thread...

"3 wheeled bikes "

Pretty sure those are called tricyles.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 25, 2013 | 11:46 AM up reply rec (8)

and…

Chael's not winning.

He’s not holding Jones down for 5 rounds.

He’s not going to stop Jones with strikes (when was the last time he did that?).

He’s not going to submit Jones.

I quite literally have no idea what avenue he has to win this fight.

by TMadeBurner on Apr 25, 2013 | 12:54 PM up reply rec (6)

From the "Wrestling with the Past: Super Sunday and Pro Wrestling's Turning Point" thread:

I grew up watching the AWA

When I was a small boy and Jack Kennedy was president I first watched Verne Gagne and company on the black and white TV in the den with my dad because Mom wanted to watch Jackie Gleason on the color set in the living room.

Like any kid who went crazy for pro wrestling, I cheered the faces, hated the heels and believed it was real. As good as the AWA was in the era discussed in this article, it was even better in the 1960s and 1970s. In addition to Verne Gagne, I saw the Crusher, Dick the Bruiser, the Vachon Brothers, Cowboy Bill Watts, The Great Billy Robinson, Red Bastien, Billy “Red” Lyons, the Mighty Igor, Larry Hennig, Harley Race, Lars Anderson, “Superstar” Billy Graham, Johnny Powers,, Ernie “Big Cat” Ladd, Hard Boiled Haggerty, Don Muraco, a very young Dusty Rhodes and Dick Murdoch (the Texas Outlaws), Wilbur Snyder , Dr. X (as the Destroyer was called in the AWA) and more great wrestlers than I could count.

Oh, and Nick Bockwinkel, Ray Stevens and their manager, a precocious young fellow who then called himself Beautiful Bobby Heenan. I went to the live shows once in a while even as a kid and faithfully watched every Saturday night for years and years. Years later I was in the audience at the St. Paul Civic Center on the night that Greg Gagne and the Crusher first stuffed Heenan into the infamous weasel suit after a brutal cage match.

That was the wrestling I knew and loved in my youth. Today far too many of those greats are forgotten. The AWA was one hell of a promotion, with some of the best wrestlers – yes wrestlers, not Superstars or “sports entertainers” – that ever graced the ring.

In 1973 I was a teenager working in a car wash in my then-hometown of Richfield, Minnesota, the suburb immediately to the south of Minneapolis. I was the guy who did the final wipe of the front of the car and hopped in to wipe down the interior.

One day a huge Caddy came through, and I did my thing as the car came out of the wash. I jumped out of the car and saw a handsome, athletic blonde guy with a gorgeous woman on his arm waiting for the car. I took me a second to realize that the guy was NICK FREAKING BOCKWINKEL. I stammered, blurted out something like “Mr. Bockwinkel, I am a big fan of yours…” He thanked me, smiled, looked his car over and proceeded to tip me ten bucks before he drove away. These days that may not sound like much. But in those days I was making $1.65 per hour.

To this day, I will never allow anyone to disrespect Bockwinkel if I am around to read or hear it.

What ultimately did the AWA in, according to most people in the know here in the Twin Cities, was Verne Gagne’s legendary cheapness. The Crusher once mentioned that he made more working a couple of toursfor the WWF than he did in two years working for Verne.

Verne lowballed his talent and played right into Vince’s hands and those of Jim Crockett with some ill-considered booking decisions. So he bears a share of the blame for the long,, slow, sad death of the AWAand the rise of the WWF and what became WCW. That said, the incredible history of the AWA deserves to be far better known and appreciated. That, my friends, was professional wrestling as it should be.

by Hifismark on Apr 25, 2013 | 12:28 PM reply rec (8)

From the "Video of Michael Bay asking The Rock to "Grow Up"" thread:

As a fan of film...

…Michael Bay, please grow the fuck up, your movies make us all less intelligent and you ruin everything you touch. Marky Mark may think Rock needs to grow up too, but hey, Marky Mark says things like how he wishes he were on one of the hijacked planes on 9/11 BECAUSE HEWOULD HAVE STOPPED IT.

by bigstupidsmile on Apr 25, 2013 | 3:11 PM reply rec (7)

and also from the same thread...

Is it too late to put my two cents into the "Fuck Michael Bay" discussion? No?

::clears throat::

Fuck you, Michael Bay.

by Blueblob4life on Apr 25, 2013 | 3:23 PM reply rec (11)

and...

Dwayne can only grow so much

You have to do roids on a schedule, meaning there is some downtime :(

by Eugene Saxe on Apr 25, 2013 | 4:32 PM reply rec (4)

From the "Hold on to your butts" thread:

IWC CAN NOT COMPUTE. HHH MUST BURY ALL THE THINGS

by HerpDerpson on Apr 25, 2013 | 5:30 PM reply rec (7)

and also from the same thread...

BURIED

Giving it 6 months before he beats them in a 1 on 3 handicap match.

by BarkerWoofer on Apr 25, 2013 | 5:33 PM reply rec (5)

and...

Man, Shield vs. DX?

I don’t care who wins, who politicked for the win, who did what, man… we win.

by ReverendKain on Apr 25, 2013 | 5:42 PM up reply rec (3)

and...

Call me naive

But I think HHH is steadily transitioning into his managerial role and his ego would be more towards building up a roster of stars and keeping them there. For example as a wrestler with many potential rivals for his spot it was all about maintaining and advancing his own position (even if he had to do that by attaching himself to others) by burying potential rivals and establishing his dominance.

Now his position as an executive is secure as the only check on his power is Vince (in which case all he has to do is outlive him). His legacy will be to say hey, you see those guys the shield? I made them. And for all his faults he does seem to be a student of this business and understands that you have certain cash cows and you must protect them.

The only time I can see him burying some one is if he thinks they are in breach of some back room code, are disrespecting this business, or are acting out of line. Otherwise since his compensation is based on the wwe’s quarterly and annual earnings (which will eventually exceed his earnings as a performer) he will make sure to do whats best for this business.

by Primus Flavius on Apr 25, 2013 | 5:45 PM up reply rec (6)

From the "TNA Impact results and reactions from last night (April 25): Same old TNA" thread:

I hate to be an elitist wrestling fan....

But I couldn’t watch this shit if I was being paid to do so.

by BlackRob on Apr 26, 2013 | 7:08 AM reply rec (5)

and also from the same thread...

TNA

Total Narcissistic Agenda. Hogan and Sting both need to go away, now.

by john.m.hall1 on Apr 26, 2013 | 7:40 AM reply rec (7)

and...

To paraphrase a tweet from last night (it wasn't from me but it was so good)...

Sting holds out a bat in Hogan’s direction and Mike Tenay’s on the call. Is it 2013… or 1997?

Also, I am convinced there is more drama in the Heat-Bucks series than last night’s Impact.

by The Notorious Eddie Mac on Apr 26, 2013 | 8:33 AM reply rec (7)

and...

If a Knockout or Diva trained nothing but roll up defense for 6-8 weeks

She would be pretty much unstoppable….

by ultmma on Apr 26, 2013 | 10:39 AM reply rec (7)

From the "On This Date in WWE History (Apr.26): Undertaker & Stephanie McMahon's unholy wedding" thread:

You never go full Russo.

by Simark on Apr 26, 2013 | 4:12 PM reply rec (5)

____________________________

In closing, Cagesiders, don't forget these awards are all about YOU; so if you think I missed anything, or have any suggestions or tweaks for the Cageside RECs, please let us know in the comments below, or email one of the site editors through our Masthead page. Bring it on with some awesome award-winning stuff for next week's RECs. Until then, see ya in the threads!

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Editors Note: Get Internet Famous! (Even If You're Nobody) You Too Can Win The Interwebs! Remember, you can't win a Cageside REC Award* if you don't play, er um contribute.

*Disclaimer: Winning the Internet - via The Cageside REC Awards in this weekly column guarantees you nothing but Internet notoriety within a small community of pro wrestling smarks. Cagesideseats.com is not responsible for any harm you may or may not do to yourself or others in the event you are unable to handle your new found Internet fame as a result of winning this award. That is all, stay calm and carry on.

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