WWE 'Main Event' returned last night (April, 24, 2013) from the O2 Arena in London, England, featuring Mark Henry mowing down not one, not two, not three, but four WWE Superstars!
Or he was going to if he didn't quit on the last one.
If you missed the show, or just want to go back and read the live blog again, click here.
To the reactions!
- John "Bradshaw" Layfield opened the show by proclaiming the greatness of Mark Henry. But he did it in that passive aggressive way your mother always does, where they don't seem happy with what you are actually doing and always seem to suggest you can do more. Which led to Henry increasing his demands from a one-on-one match, to a handicap match, to a three-on-one match, to finally a gauntlet. It's nice when WWE pretends to care about why matches are set up beyond, "Hey, all you playas/suckas in the ring right now! Ya'll in a tag team match!" JBL pokes and prods Henry, Henry demands action, and we have the first half of Main Event. Simple booking is simple.
- That being said, the gauntlet matches were meh, okay, decent, and complete crap. Jimmy Uso getting squashed lickity-split? Enjoyable. Jey Uso stringing together a super kick and big butt in the corner before succumbing to the World's Strongest Slam? C.J. approves! Santino Marella acting as the joker before actually landing the Cobra? Very cool! Watching him march right into the WSS? Even cooler! The Great Khali limping into the ring? Not cool. Watching the two giants repeat spots to prolong the pain? Very not cool. Seeing Mark Henry walk away from the match and eat a ten count? That is just depressing. There is no reason for us to see the trope continue. Either Henry is an unstoppable monster, or he's the cowardly heel. "That's what I do!" only works when he does awesome things, not when he runs away from a fight. WWE is trying to have its cake and eat it too, which only leads to soggy, partially digested cake. And no one wants that.
- Holy crap, Zeb Colter. How do you butcher a one sentence Thomas Paine quote? The real one is "What we obtain too cheap, we esteem too lightly." And that works! Because Dolph Ziggler obtained the World Heavyweight Championship in a cheap way. Zeb ended up stumbling and trailed off at the end, and I think finished the line with "you value it less." Which is such a rookie mistake. If you're going to be a mouthpiece, you have to be better than that. Additionally, Zeb had the line, "Thomas Paine was born in England, but had the good sense to leave for America." Good sense? Good sense?! Paine's most famous work is Common Sense. The joke is right there! It is right [explicit] there! You make my head sad, Zeb.
- The rest of Zeb's promo was uneventful. If you've heard it once, you've heard it a millions times.
- I did enjoy re-watching The Shield vs. Team Hell No & The Undertaker, and I want to let it slide a little bit. But the fact the second half consists solely of Raw recaps is not entertaining in the slightest.
Main Event has slid back into "Don't Watch" territory, and it's almost not worth caring anymore. If WWE isn't going to put an effort into the show, why should fans put an effort into crying over its demise?
What say you, Cagesiders? Was there anything that saved the episode for you, or was it simply the same old garbage? Let me know how right -- or how wrong -- I am in the comments.