Slapstick Saturday: Ugly hermaphrodite interviews The Rock ahead of WWE's 'Painus In Your Anus'

Michael N. Todaro

Welcome to another edition of "Slapstick Saturday," Cagesiders, where your old pal Hulk Holland pokes fun at every botch, blooper and bomb the world of professional wrestling has ever given us.

Not long ago, we marked "this date in history" with Rikishi's DID IT FOR DA ROCK confession (watch it here), which included The Rock's hilarious impersonation of his fellow Samoan.

But that dig was just a teeny, tiny part of his epic Hell in a Cell promo for Armageddon, which we are re-visiting for this edition of Slapstick Saturday, now that WWE is fast-approaching its fenced-in pay-per-view (PPV) event later this month (Oct. 27) in Miami.

Or as "The Great One" calls it, a "Rage in the Cage" or even better, "Painus in Your Anus."

"The Brahma Bull" proceeded to shred his five other opponents including:

Kurt Angle: "I'm gonna drink a big glass of milk! Eat some chocolate chip cookies and then maybe I'll take three Viagra!"
Rikishi, who he refers to as a thong-wearing fatty: "I did it ... for da Rock. I did it ... for da people."
The Undertaker: "Rest ... in ... peace..."
Triple H: "He's gotta beat The Game-ah, in the middle of the ring-ah, and he has a two-dollar slut for a wife-ah."
Stone Cold Steve Austin: "I gotta get in my pick-up truck, drink some Steve-weisers, listen to some Backstreet Boys. And that's the bottom line, 'cause The Great One said so!"

Maybe it was the glasses.

It's not often these days, if ever, that you can give a superstar a four-minute promo that doesn't take place inside the ring and have the crowd eating out of your hand. Then again, that's the kind of performer The Rock was, who had it all, and took it with him to Hollywood.

Mourn with me.

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