FanPost

Book review- Rumble Road

This is essentially a collection of road stories from WWE superstars. It’s a quick and easy read so I will give a few thoughts. The stories are told by the superstars and this an officially sanctioned WWE book. Not kay-fabe.

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via i.imgur.com

First we get a nice intro on travel from my new best friend, MVP. He told Vince McMahon “What I do in front of our audience, I do it for free. What I charge Vince McMahon for is all my time on the road…..The travel is the real work of the business.”

A few of the best stories- Christian used a deaf relay phone operator to create a deaf stalker of Chris Jericho. She loves his music despite not being able to hear it. He was scared when she started saying Im going to bury a knife in if you don’t want to have sex with me.

This prank by Christian was revenge for Jericho using a celebrity call service to send Christian a get well message during his knee rehab. The call was from Lash Leroux. He used Christian’s real name.

“Hey, this is Lash Leroux!”

“Yeah?”

“Hey little buddy, hope your knee feels soon”” (hangs up after 15 seconds)

Kofi Kingston and Hornswoggle are road buddies. Hornswoggle is pulling pranks. Especially on the Miz. One night, he dumped water on a sleeping Miz and locked him out of his room. Miz has to go to the front desk in underwear and cover in water to get a new key. While he is getting Hornswoggle takes the old key and steals the Miz’s clothes. Miz comes back and goes straight to bed not knowing his stuff was missing. They made him sweat most of the next morning.

Imagine seeing Christian walking through O’Hare terminal with DICKFACE written on his forehead.

Randy Orton broke into Cody Rhodes’ stall at a tanning salon. He stole Cody’s clothes and took a picture of Cody’s erection. After tormenting Cody for a week, Orton deleted it (sorry ladies).

Shelton Benjamin and Rey Misterio used to get into fake fights at gas stations Rey with no mask and Shelton was still unknown at the time). Sometimes these fights ended in Shelton leaving the store and coming back to “kidnap” Rey.

Mark Henry once lifted a Chevy Impala out of a ditch by himself.

Imagine Santino, Orton, and Mr. Kennedy doing an impression of the Bohemian Rhapsody scene from Wayne’s World .

Tommy Dreamer, Christian and Dolph Ziggler sound like an amazing trio to ride with. They just talk the whole time, no music.

WWE superstars have a tradition of buying weird stuff on the road. Elvis paintings, Jeff Gordon air fresheners, bizarre Koosh ball creatures. They usually get left in the rental car.

Imagine Layla, Eve and Maria sharing a bed.

Brie Bella seems like the crazy one. She almost arrested for getting drunk at a casino in Green Bay and taking a swim after hours in her dress. So good work, Daniel Bryan.

The Miz had a bizarre dinner with Ezekiel Jackson. Its probably the best story that I cant properly summarize. Jackson is a strange guy.

Dolph Ziggler loves almonds. Eve and Natalya love Corn Nuts.

Taka Michanoku pretended to not speak English for weeks. The Nation of Domination basically chauffeured him everywhere until he was busted. He spoke better English than most them actually.

Santino once punched a 15 year old girl in a Tasmanian Devil costume at a theme park.

Still you can check it out. Its 188 pages, so it won’t take much time.

The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Cageside Seats readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Cageside Seats editors or staff.

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