TNA Impact Wrestling
Your favorite Cagesider -- that's me, you jerks -- was live in attendance for TNA's big 10th anniversary pay-per-view extravaganza last night (Sun., June 10), the Slammiversary event in Arlington, Texas.
Being from the Dallas/Fort Worth area, I couldn't pass up the chance to see some large scale pro rasslin' going on in my backyard so tickets were purchased and a couple of friends and I drove down to UT Arlington campus to enjoy the show.
Basically, I saw and witnessed things you normal pay-per-view buying schlubs didn't get to experience.
I met Fat Jay Lethal for one and also had the most annoying chanter sitting behind me.
But before I get ahead of myself, let's start from the beginning...
Right after the jump!
I roll up to my The Wrestling Aficionado -- we're coming back, I promise -- co-host Rodie Jon's house around 5:45pm CT and immediately ask where the limo is.
Sergio gonna Sergio.
So anyhow, we head on our way. We arrive to the venue and there's no charge for parking. YES~!
Unfortunately, they're not letting anyone in until 6:30pm CT so we have to stand outside in the hot summer Texas sun for a bit. BOO~!
All I'm saying is standing on a sidewalk in the summer in Texas among a bunch of TNA fans is sort of my idea of hell.
We finally get inside and I am actually amazed at how many people are there and genuinely excited about that fact. The merch table is bumping as is the concession stand.
We find our seats, kick the jerkholes sitting in them out and rest our fannies. Pretty full house with only a few scattered empty seats. We decide to get some grub and drinks and head down to the still full concession stand. As a result, we miss Hulk Hogan's opening promo. Whatevs.
We get back and there are new fools in our seats. Kick rocks, homies.
- Austin Aries vs. Samoa Joe - Hot, hot, HOT opener. Great match and the crowd was insanely into it. Half the crowd was behind the champ, half behind the challenger. I tried to start an old school "Joe's gonna kill you" chant which was joined in by a guy behind me who later butchered it. More on that dude later.
- Kid Kash taking on Hernandez was next which was better than it had any reason to be. Hernandez plancha'ing over the top rope got a huge pop. Crowd was insanely hot throughout the entire night.
- The tag match came up after and I wanted to boo every time Bischoff got into the ring but he started the match off and got the hot tag off to Devon so my plan was foiled. Curses, TNA, curses! Devon was crazy over and even started doing the Hogan ear-cup thing after the match. Madison Rayne showed up at one point but I have no idea why.
- So aforementioned dude sitting behind me loved Mr. Anderson so my hatred for him sky rocketed at this point. A "Let's go, asshole!" chant let his mouth every other minute and absolutely no one joined in. It wasn't just that his chants were stupid -- they were -- but it was also he was just flat out awful at it. His phrasing, his timing, they were all bad. Best heel of the show, hands down. Also, right as Jeff Hardy came out from the back, I heard a shrill "IT'S JEFF HARDY, IT'S JEFF HARDY!" scream in my ear. I turned around to expect a teenage girl but was greeted with an 8-year-old boy. Kids be loving drug traffickers, I guess.
- James Storm answered Crimson's open challenge. I heard it didn't come across well on TV but the crowd popped pretty well for his return. Man, the mutants at the Impact Zone don't deserve him going over on Bobby Roode at Bound for Glory.
- Dixie Carter came out next to announce the first TNA Hall of Famer. I tried to start a "harlot" chant but everyone was too busy chanting "TNA" and "Thank you, Dixie" or other stuff. SHE CHEATED ON HER HUSBAND WITH ONE OF HER EMPLOYEES, HOW IS SHE SYMPATHETIC?! So Sting's announced and everyone loves it. The nice touch was Roode, Bully Ray and the tag champs deucing out as soon as possible.
- Brooke Tessmacher became the new Knockouts Champion next. They really played up her Texas roots. Pretty lousy match as Tessmacher isn't that great a wrestler. Gail Kim got into it with Red Hat Guy after the match. He's actually a pretty nice guy.
- Bully Ray and Joseph Park came up next. Decent match considering the limitations they had with the Park character and tons of heat based on the crowd's hatred of the Yankees. For sure, there was another dude under the ring dressed as Abyss since the switch took less than 10 seconds. Kudos to whoever that was for chilling underneath for three effin' hours.
- Christian shows up to announce the number one moment in TNA history and it's Sting's return back in 2006. This event should have been called Jerkoffstingaversary. It was still pretty insane to see the current WWE Intercontinental Champion inside a competitor's ring during a pay-per-view.
- Tag match came next and again, my "homewrecker" chant towards AJ Styles gains no traction. Decent match.
- Main event came next which pretty much sucked but that's what you get when a dude who's over 50-years-old is in the ring. Roode gets the pinfall in the most ridiculous way possible -- THE REFEREE SERIOUSLY DIDN'T WORRY ABOUT THE BROKEN GLASS?! -- and got his shit kicked in after the match. I guess he's still facing Mr. Anderson this Thursday. Ugh.
We bounce and head back to my friend's house and make it home in record time. I swing by Bone Daddy's and call into Cageside Live and promise to have my live notes to you guys by night's end.
I type them up while watching an episode of Doctor Who and then go to sleep.
I dream about Cher Lloyd.


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