WWE Monday Night Raw comes waltzing back into our lives tonight (April 30, 2012) from the EJ Nutter Center in Dayton, Ohio, and features all the fallout from the Extreme Rules pay-per-view (PPV) that took place last night in Chicago, Illinois.
John Cena has defeated the bully, Brock Lesnar, but it came at a cost. WWE.com ran a storyline injury angle consistent with Cena's post-match promo saying he would be leaving for a while.
Tonight, we'll presumably get an answer as to just what the hell is going on exactly.
For that matter, we'll hopefully get to hear from Lesnar on the events that transpired last night. One would think it's imperative that he comes back strong but one would also think he shouldn't be losing his first match back in eight years after he was booked as a legitimate shoot fighting champion who couldn't be stopped.
CM Punk will be moving on from his feud with Chris Jericho, unless WWE believes they can drag out one more PPV match from the two before the latter takes off for the summer to tour with his band. We shall see.
Oh and Triple H is showing up to chat with John Laurinaitis. Who knows what that's all about?
Raw starts at 9 p.m. ET time on USA, so be sure to make your way back here to chat with all your favorite Cagesiders during the show. It's always a fun time. Raw live blog after the jump.
WWE RAW RESULTS LIVE BLOG APRIL 30
Broadcast is live.
We get the usual still-shot highlights of last night's show to let us know what happened with Cena and Lesnar. Immediately, we're told that Cena won "against all odds." They also play a bit from Cena's ending promo playing up that he's leaving. Folks are shown crying in the crowd.
Great production work, as usual.
Justin Roberts opens the show by saying, "Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Monday Night Raw Starring Brock Lesnar." He then introduces John Laurinaitis, who gets a few boos on his way out.
Laurinaitis says he revolutionized the WWE in one night and he did it for the WWE Universe and "People Power." He says everyone should thank him for having the foresight to bring in the most destructive force, the most dangerous athlete and the man whose face will be synonymous with the company for years to come.
He then says Lesnar beat up Cena so bad last night, Cena will never be the same again. They're completely ignoring Brock losing the match. That's one way to go about it.
Laurinaitis says Brock brought legitimacy back to WWE. It's his honor to introduce him.
And here comes the pain.
He says last night the world got to witness firsthand, Brock Lesnar bringing the pain, which is exactly what he told the world he was going to do. "Ace" says yes, he did and that's why he's the face of WWE.
Cue Triple H's music.
Lesnar looks pissed and he's got his hands up like he's ready for a fight.
"The Game" shakes Lesnar's hand, though Brock is tentative about it.
Laurinaitis says he's sure Trips is out to congratulate the new face of the WWE.
Triple H says he's out to do what Laurinaitis should be doing but doesn't have the guts to. Trips says Brock's days of holding up the WWE are through.
What days? All four of them?
Trips says the private jet he flew in on won't be taking him back home unless he wants to pay for it. That also applies to the limo. Lesnar is staring at Laurinaitis like he wants to kill someone.
Triple H says no raise, no special treatment, and the show is called Monday Night Raw ... period.
"Ace" looks uncomfortable as hell with Brock staring daggers into him.
Triple H says if Lesnar is staying, he'll get everything from the contract he first negotiated, not the demands he bullied out of Laurinaitis last week, which he agreed to without having the proper authority.
Laurinaitis steps in and says Trips entrusted him to deal with all talent contracts and he did it for WWE. And it's not right to go back on their word.
So "The Game" grabs the contract and rips it up. Lesnar looks livid right now staring at Trips ripping it up.
Triple H continues by saying Brock isn't getting any of the shit Laurinaitis promised him. I love it that Lesnar just keeps staring at "Ace" like he's going to snap his neck at any second.
Trips says he wants Brock here and so does the WWE Universe. Even if they hate him, they want to see him. They want a rematch with John Cena. They want to see him against CM Punk, Randy Orton, Sheamus and on down the line.
But if that's going to happen, it needs to happen under the original contract.
Triple H says if he wants to take his ball and pack it away with his loss to Cena and go home, that's fine, but no one wants that.
So what's it going to be?
Laurinaitis says it's not fair to put a talent of Brock's stature in this position. Triple H tells him to shut up.
Lesnar keeps looking at "Ace." Trips says it's between them now, forget Johnny.
"The original terms were more than fair. What's it going to be?"
Again, Laurinaitis butts in and Trips shuts him down, this time more forcefully.
Triple H says he wants Lesnar here. "Do we got a deal?"
Yet again, Laurinaitis says Triple H is being disrespectful now and he's going to address this with the Board of Directors. Once Triple H turns around to address Laurinaitis, Lesnar attacks.
They brawl a bit and Lesnar locks on the kimura. He works it over and a few boys from the back come running out. Big Show, Sheamus, R-Truth and Kofi Kingston. Triple H tells Kofi that Brock broke his arm. They've got the "medical personnel" out there.
Lesnar has his shirt off breathing hard like a goddamn monster and walking around the ring staring everyone down. He gets to the top of the ramp and walks out through the side while Triple H sells in the ring with folks helping him to the back.
Show and Sheamus help Trips to the back as he again proclaims that it's broken.
We got backstage after a replay and medical personnel are talking to Triple H and he says he can't move his hands or his fingers. He's really hurt, you guys.
Jerry Lawler says he could actually hear Triple H's arm snap from his ringside position.
Eve comes out and says they will have a Beat The Clock Challenge to determine who will get a shot at CM Punk and the WWE title at Over the Limit in three weeks.
First match up next.
The Miz vs. Santino Marella -- Rematch from last night. Opens with Marella looking for quick covers but getting nothin. Lawler tells us on commentary that Brock has been escorted out of the building. Meanwhile, Santino works over Miz but Miz comes back with a kick to the head off the ropes.
Gets a two count with just over one minute gone by.
Miz in control. Hits the running clothesline in the corner. Comes off the ropes with a double axe handle and that gets a two count. A few elbows and punches and another cover gets two. Miz works a choke hold now and Lawler rightly calls him out for trying to wear his opponent down during a Beat the Clock match.
Santino reverses the hold with a suplex. Racks Miz against the ropes.
Time for Marella's five moves of doom. Splits, hip toss, running headbutt, Cobra. I guess that's four. He misses the Cobra and they trade near falls before Miz regains control with a boot in the corner. He comes out and hits the Skull Crushing Finale that gets the pin at 4:18.
They show still shot replays of Layla returning last night to win the Divas title. Rematch time, it looks like. The Bella twins are already in the ring and bickering back and forth.
Layla vs. Nikki Bella vs. Brie Bella -- Layla still has her brace on but she seems to be working okay on it. The Bellas argue and Layla dropkicks one of them, which knocks the other one out and rolls up one left in the ring for the pin. Too bad she wasn't in the Beat the Clock challenge.
Suddenly the lights go out and that means it's time for Chris Jericho. Another Beat the Clock challenge match.
Chris Jericho vs. Big Show -- I guess no heel turn for Show. Especially since he was helping Triple H to the back. He gives away his cap to a child before going to the ring.
Oh, Show, ya big lug.
Jericho has his arm wrapped, still selling last night's Chicago Street Fight. Show comes out quick and slams Jericho into a quick cover that gets two. Back to the corner and the shoot slaps that the crowd loves so much.
Show goes off the ropes, Jericho dropkicks the knee and Show goes flying through the air. Love Show selling like that. Not much better.
They do the spot with Jericho kicking him down repeatedly while Show tries to get up but getting tossed a mile on the pinfall attempt. Jericho goes up top but gets knocked in the chest coming off.
Now Show to the second rope for a splash but Jericho moves. He gets up and hits the Lionsault. Show's so damn big, he went flying after landing it.
The ensuing pinfall attempt gets two.
Lawler brings up how Jericho lost twice already and how many shots should he get after losing. Gotta agree.
Jericho goes for the Walls of Jericho but can't get the big man's legs over. Show reverses into a roll up but gets two. Jericho regains control, though. He fails to capitalize on it. Show goes for the WMD but misses. Jericho looks for the Codebreaker but Show catches him. Jericho reverses via sending him out.
Show pushes Jericho into the barricade and then goes for a big boot but misses and goes over. This leads to a count out and Jericho wins, beating Miz's time by just one second. Apparently. It didn't look like he actually beat it at all.
Lawler says they need time to sort it out and they quickly cut to break.
They say Jericho couldn't beat the clock after all, which is the right call, and Miz is still the guy to beat at 4:18.
SOMEBODY CALL MY MOMMA.
Brodus Clay is out sans Hornswoggle this time.
Brodus Clay vs. JTG -- They showed JTG shaking his head by the ring after Clay did his dance routine. They start the match with JTG trying a collar and elbow tie up. Instead, Clay eats a kick to the gut before going into his usual spots.
Straight slam leads to Clay shouting, "MY BAD" and dropping an elbow. Clay goes for another slam but JTG breaks out and goes after the knees. No matter, Clay quickly regains control and hits the Rhino headbutt. Then the sheeplex, then the splash for the pin and the victory.
Back to the old formula.
Clay brings a few kids into the ring to do the dinosaur dance. Right on.
It's the 10 p.m. ET hour and they simply show the same video segment they did to start the show. Cena overcoming the odds to defeat Lesnar last night at Extreme Rules before announcing (kind of) that he's leaving. For some reason. We still don't know.
Cole now doing the recap of the opening segment from the show. And now we get a video replay of that.
They tease that Laurinaitis and John Cena will go face-to-face in the ring later tonight.
Backstage and "Ace" is with Eve and Teddy Long. Eve tells Long to beat feet because his presence is upsetting Laurinaitis.
Eve tries to talk to Laurinaitis but he's staring straight at her chest. She says, "My eyes are up here" and he just ignores her.
She continues by saying he needs to stand tall and not let this whole thing get to him. He needs to take over. Who is John Cena's next opponent going to be? Laurinaitis says he knows exactly who it's going to be and he can guarantee Cena's not going to like it.
Time for the next Beat the Clock Challenge match.
Randy Orton vs. Jack Swagger -- Orton tries a quick roll up and fails. Swagger gets him in the corner and landing shoulder blocks but Orton jumps out and tries another roll up that only gets one and a half.
Swagger hits his splash from the corner spot less than one minute into the match and Orton sells for it by letting the count go long but ultimately, he kicks out. Swagger tries the gutwrench powerbomb but Orton reverses into a backbreaker. Ensuing pinfall attempt gets two.
Swagger comes off the ropes and goes at Orton's knee. Shoulder block off the ropes gets a two count. The crowd gets hot and chants for the RKO. Or at least it sounds like it.
Swagger remains in control and he's doing rest spots. A big "Let's Go Randy" chant breaks out with 1:20 left on the clock. Swagger tried the splash again but Orton hit the kick to the gut in midair. Orton gets his big moves in. Clotheslines, slams, draping DDT.
The crowd goes ape shit when he calls for the RKO. Still 0:30 left. Swagger manages to reverse the RKO into the Ankle Lock. Orton rolls and sends Swagger into the turnbuckle. When he turns around, Orton hits the RKO and gets the pin with just two seconds left on the clock to win at 4:16.
Good TV match, another in a long line for Orton.
Suddenly, a graphic comes up showing John Cena vs. a mystery man at Over the Limit. Hmmm. Laurinaitis will reveal tonight, apparently.
Kofi Kingston and R-Truth are getting tag title shots next, though.
Primo and Epico vs. R-Truth and Kofi Kingston -- The belts are on the line this time. Michael Cole reminds us of how shitty the champions have been in matches where the titles were up for grabs but how they win when they are. We'll see if they can get the job done tonight.
Primo starts off the match with Truth. Primo gets over with me big time by kicking Little Jimmy, which leads to Truth going nuts on him. That was phenomenal.
Truth knocks Primo out and does the "what's up" to the crowd, who gives it right back to him.
Lawler tells us that Triple H's arm has, in fact, been broken. We'll see how long that lasts.
In the ring, the heels are in control, as Primo and Epico tag in and out working over Truth. He teases the comeback but gets snuffed out. Primo covers but only gets two.
Not long after, Truth gets enough offense in to lead to the hot tag and Kofi comes flying in from off the top of the ropes. He's doing all his high flying stuff, leading to the Boom Drop. Calling for the Trouble in Paradise. Rosa gets up on the apron for the distraction. It doesn't work and Kofi hits the Trouble in Paradise to get the pin.
Kofi Kingston and R-Truth are the new WWE tag team champions.
Abraham Washington is shown talking to Primo and Epico, telling them they never would have lost the belts had they been with him. It cuts to Khali coming in.
The next Beat the Clock Challenge features two big boys.
Great Khali vs. Kane -- I've run into some technical issues here at home. Stand by.
Okay, I'm back and Khali and Kane are down to 0:20 seconds left in the match. They're on the outside and Khali sends Kane back in. This leads to both guys grabbing throats and going to a stalemate. The clock runs out and Kane ultimately hits a chokeslam on Khali.
Orton needs to survive just one more match, they tell us.
Once again they tease who John Cena's opponent will be at Over the Limit, which we'll find out tonight.
Daniel Bryan is in the last Beat the Clock Challenge match. He's up next but they don't tell us against who.
Daniel Bryan vs. Jerry Lawler -- Interesting booking here. Bryan shouts "YES" when he sees his opponent. Maybe this leads to his getting cocky and losing out?
He works Lawler over in the corner to start. Sends him to the other side and works him there. Lawler kicks out of the first pinfall attempt and gets up landing punches then a dropkick. His cover gets only one. Bryan back with a kick to the gut. He sets up a corner kick but misses when Lawler moves. He goes up to the second rope and hits the punch off the second rope.
Man, that looks hard on the knees.
Lawler looks for the piledriver but gets reversed into the back body drop. Bryan then gets the YES Lock and he wins the Beat the Clock Challenge easily.
CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan for the WWE championship at Over the Limit?
YES! YES! YES!
Punk's music hits as Bryan celebrates and he comes out clapping and mouthing the words, "I can't wait."
We can't either, sir. Cole puts over the match saying we're getting to great technical wrestlers with the belt on the line. What could be better?
And he's right.
That leaves just one segment, folks. John Cena and John Laurinaitis face-to-face up next.
Another replay of Lesnar, Triple H and Laurinaitis earlier in the night. Cole again tells us that Lesnar is out of the building, escorted out, and we have to assume he's getting fired. Triple H, by the way, has a broken arm.
Cena's music hits and let's see what all his teasing was about last night. He comes out wearing a sling on his left arm and yelling at the camera, "I made it. I'm here."
He walks to the ring with a big fat smile on his face. Oh, John. Cole says an MRI revealed that he suffered "multiple muscle strains" but nothing that will cause permanent damage.
Oh, boy, that sounds rough.
Cena says tonight Triple H felt his arm break. He thought he felt the same last night but he didn't. He's here wearing a sling, but at least he's here. All x-rays showed no breaks. MRI shows no tears. So basically he's totally fine other than some strains to his muscles in his arm.
He says there's a big difference between being injured and being hurt. When you're injured, you get sent home. When you're hurt, you get to come out here and do what you do best, so he's here.
Cue Laurinaitis' music.
This is terrible already. Doesn't even matter what they do. This whole schtick with Cena always being around is just dumb. In no way is it a good thing. At all. Ever.
Cena goes into dumb guy voice and intros Laurinaitis. He then guesses that Laurinaitis got him Zues for Over the Limit to commemorate the re-release of No Holds Barred.
"Ace" says he went out and got Lesnar and called him the face of WWE just to motivate Cena. John says no, what he did was hire a mercenary to take him out. Laurinaitis says that's not true and he brought out the best John Cena possible.
"You should really be thanking me, John."
They go into the "WHAT" chants. Cena starts bombing on Laurinaitis saying he's got his head up his own ass and sounds like he's smoked a lot of cigarettes. Laurinaitis says Cena should build a relationship with him and John just keeps dogging him out. Calls him an idiot and all that.
Laurinaitis says let's put the past behind us and let's set up his next opponent in three weeks.
Before Laurinaitis is even done talking, Lord Tensai's music hits and this is fucking garbage. Wow. I'm not even sure what to say to this.
Cena gets ready for battle by taking his hat off. Laurinaitis stands there. Tensai and his partner get in the ring and Laurinaitis drills Cena from behind.
He tells Cena that his opponent at Over the Limit is ... himself?
Yes, folks, John Cena vs. John Laurinaitis is now booked for Over the Limit.
Tensai and his buddy start beating up Cena and Laurinaitis is now beating up Cena and going after the injured arm.
Tensai holds Cena down with his arm exposed on the steel steps. "Ace" gets a chair and hits it while mean mugging Cena.
The show ends with Laurinaitis, Tensai and his buddy walking out.
Fade to black.