We posted The Rock's concert earlier today so it's only right that we present the little rap show John Cena put on last night (March 12, 2012) on WWE Monday Night Raw in Cleveland.
Cena opened the show, spitting a few rhymes that lasted just a few minutes and accomplished his goal of letting Rock know he wants to teabag him at WrestleMania 28 on April 1 in Miami. Personally, I wasn't that impressed with his rap. I mean, it was just basic thuganomics.
In reality, it was a risky decision on WWE's part to have Cena come out in full blown 2003 gimmick and acting as fake as Rock has the entire time he's been back. I suppose it was offset by the fact that fans have wanted this version of Cena for some time now and they would simply enjoy this for what it was.
One day later, that seems to generally be the case.
What will be most interesting is how they follow this up next week. To that end, stay tuned. After the jump, you can read the lyrics of the above diddy, in case the video doesn't work for you.
"Rock wanted me to write his song tonight but I would never be his mouthpiece,
Cause Rock's like Lebron James, he took his talents straight down to South Beach.
"And for the past few weeks, Rock's been legitimately pissed,
If you get stuck singing your song tonight, Rock, it's all in the wrist.
"Could we please have a week where you don't come out here and choke,
You may be G.I. Joe this summer, right now you're a G.I. Joke.
"Ever since I opened my mouth about you, you been begging me to back off,
So if Rock and Dwayne are the same person, I think y'all both are jackoffs.
"And after April first, you won't be making no more movies,
You gon need surgery on your face just like you had on your boobies."
"Those popping pecs, they had more work than a locker room full of Divas,
I got a gift for Rock tonight, I'ma give him a Cleveland Steamer.
"Team Bring It? He's Team Lost It and the truth is getting scary,
Cause they weren't chanting 'Rocky' last week, they were chanting 'Tooth Fairy.'
"Keep making fun of this Fruity Pebble, Rock, cause I ain't even close to sick of it,
I'm Mr. Kung Pao Chicken, you just Miami Fried Chickenshit.
"And no. No, I don't have balls but I've got something in their place,
I'm gonna beat your ass at WrestleMania and put my nuts dead in your face."