Wrestler Wrankings™: 2012-13 Season, Week 39

A breakdown of some of the best "RAW" episodes of 2012, plus this week's Wrestler Wrankings!

The quality of individual editions of Monday Night Raw in 2012 has been, shall we say, uneven this year. While some episodes have sunk lower than Bastion Booger's hygiene standards, others have soared higher than Koko B. Ware's parrot on a clear tropical day.

If asked, I would single out several episodes as particularly entertaining/memorable:

  1. The first Raw after WrestleMania 28. Best crowd in recent memory for Rock's hometown celebration which was drowned out by YES! chants and the surprise return of Brock Lesnar.
  2. Raw 1000. Near Mania level of hype... plus, the show pretty much delivered.
  3. The episode where Vince McMahon taught CM Punk the meaning of respect, by beating the crap out of him.

My esteemed colleagues Geno and Matt on the Cageside Live! podcast claimed that this week's episode of Raw was simply fantastic, ranking it among those listed above. One might think that I, as the advocate for the purity of sport in professional wrestling, might disagree.

To the contrary, I felt that the episode was nothing short of phenomenal. The matches themselves were hard fought, the crowd was hot, we got to see David Otunga flex his legal muscles, Team Hell No had a classic feel-weird moment, CM Punk insulted an entire city/country/genetic affliction, and John Cena won a tough and unforgettable main event.

Not to mention, the whole crux of the episode was based on one of the most "over" figures in the history of the world: Santa Claus!

Now, I know what you're all going to say, and no, I don't think that was the real Santa Claus. He's too busy this time of year to involve himself physically in a wrestling match, and besides, St. Nick would have been nimble enough to avoid Alberto Del Rio's thoughtless parking job.

Welp, Happy New Year everybody!

***

OFFICIAL WRESTLER WRANKINGS FORMULA

ANY WIN = 2 POINTS

US OR INTERCONTINENTAL TITLE BOUT = 1 POINT

WWE OR WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE BOUT = 3 POINTS

NON "BIG 4" PPV BONUS = 1.5X

SUMMERSLAM, SURVIVOR SERIES, ROYAL RUMBLE = 2X BONUS

WRESTLEMANIA = 3X BONUS

The WWE season begins on the day after WrestleMania 28 and culminates with WrestleMania 29. The wrestler who accumulates the most points over the course of the season, wins the coveted Wrankings Championship!

***

Monday Night Raw -- 12/24/12

Sheamus - 2 points (win)

John Cena - 2 points (win)

Daniel Bryan - 2 points (win)

Kane - 2 points (win)

Zack Ryder - 2 points (win)

Great Khali - 2 points (win)

Main Event -- 12/26/12

Great Khali - 2 points (win)

SmackDown -- 12/28/12

Sheamus - 2 points (win)

Big Show - 2 points (win)

Antonio Cesaro - 2 points (win)

Dolph Ziggler - 2 points (win)

Brodus Clay - 2 points (win)

---------------------------------------------------------------

WRESTLER WRANKINGS, WEEK 39 *TOP TEN*

Sheamus-hulksmash_medium

via upload.wikimedia.org

1. SHEAMUS -- 143.5 points

2. Ryback -- 103.5

3. CM Punk -- 95

4. Alberto Del Rio -- 80.5

5. Big Show -- 67.5

6. Antonio Cesaro -- 66.5

7. John Cena -- 60.5

8. Randy Orton -- 51.5

9. Dolph Ziggler -- 45

10. Daniel Bryan -- 39

Thanks so much for reading, Cagesiders. We'll see you next week!

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