A typical Monday for aspiring WWE superstar Brodus Clay

The alarm goes off, playing the song I Got You Babe. "I don't even like this song," Brodus thinks as he gets up. "But every Monday in every hotel, the damn song wakes me up. How peculiar."

He digs through his bags to get ready for first breakfast, a box of Pop-Tarts (S'mores flavored) and chocolate Slim-Fast. "Gotta keep my weight in check," Brodus tells himself as he chows down.

Now it's time for practice. Brodus stands in front of the mirror to work on his looks. He has the mean mug, the snarl, the smirk, the blank stare, and the primal scream. He also tries his casual looks.

Those need a bit more work.

Brodus moves on to wrestling. Well, not actually wrestling, but instead pinning and lifting up his body pillow. That is kind of Brodus' gimmick. He is really proud of it, and makes sure to practice it every day. The timing has to be juuuuuust right, or else it would look really stupid.

Time to check out the free continental breakfast. The room costs a little more because of it, but Brodus knows that he is going to be a WWE Superstar someday. It's okay to splurge now and then. He gets three eggs (one scrambled, one hard-boiled, one over easy), 12 sausage links, four pieces of toast, two handfuls of bacon, and a pitcher of Orange Juice (low acid, of course, because Brodus gets heartburn).

It's on the road to the arena! "This is going to be a great week," Brodus declares. "I really believe that this is going to be my week. I just cannot wait to get there."

Quick stop at McDonalds for a Big Mac, large fries, and diet Coke, and then it's time to shine.

Brodus shows up at the arena. First stop, WWE Creative to see what they have in store for him this week. He makes sure to say hello to everyone he sees as he walks around. Sure, Brodus Clay is a monster of a man in the ring, but he wants to make sure everyone knows that he is actually a really nice guy.

"Good things always happen to good people," he thinks aloud.

Creative tells Brodus he will be in a match against Jack Swagger. "Hot damn!" Brodus thinks. "Jack Swagger. What a wrestler to be up against. A former World Heavyweight Champion. Yeah, he has been on bit of a losing streak lately, but still, what a great opponent." He is happy that his faith in Creative finaly has paid off.

Brodus is hanging around backstage, eating the free Slim Jims when he sees a writer walking towards him. He is told that Swagger is now in the main event, so their match is cancelled. Brodus feels a familiar sadness wash over him. "Not again," he worries. "Not today. This is supposed to be my week, my time." Brodus feels the tears start to well up as he tries to fight them back.

But wait! The writer has more to say. He tells Brodus not to worry because Creative thought it would be great if they match him up with Alberto Del Rio. Brodus almost shrieks with glee. This will be perfect! He had worked with Del Rio before, and a feud would make perfect sense. This is going to be a great chance to break out. He politely thanks the writer for the good news, and runs off with a trail of Slim Jim wrappers following behind him.

Brodus is so giddy with excitement that he almost runs over CM Punk. He enthusiastically tells the WWE Champion about the plans for tonight and waits for a congratulations. What he receives, though, is Punk laughing in his face. "¡El stupido! Hombre es herido amigo!" Brodus stares blankly as Punk turns and walks away. "What was that all about" he asks himself. There was no time to fret, though.

Time for Brodus to get ready for Raw!

First up, pre-show meal. WWE always has such a great spread. Brodus carefully looks at his choices before deciding on a ham, turkey, chicken and cheese sandwich with lettace, tomato, pickles, and mayo on wheat bread with a side of Cheetos, Doritos, and pretzels, and a regular Coke to drink. (He'll work off those extra calories during his match.)

Then Brodus hangs out in the locker room, getting ready. He makes sure to stretch every muscle. "Wouldn't want to pull anything on my big night." He is all taped up, in his wrestling gear and ready to go. Brodus finally realizes that he hasn't seen Del Rio in the locker room. Actually, he couldn't remember seeing him at all today. How very strange.

He spies Big Show getting ready for the evening, and Brodus figures he should just ask where is partner is. "Hey Show! Have you seen Alberto Del Rio anywhere?" Big Show gives Brodus a look and starts laughing. "Good one, little buddy! Del Rio has a pulled groin. Dude is going be out for weeks. Poor bastard." Show keeps laughing as he walks out of the locker room, his voice lingering behind him.

Brodus stands there, all alone and in complete silence. And there he stays as the show opens, a show in which he will not be a part of. He starts snacking on baby carrots and sipping on Pepsi he found in Punk's locker. His misery is interrupted by a familiar beep from his bag. Brodus doesn't even need to look at his phone to know who it is from, but he does anyways. The text reads:

"Hello. My Name is John Laurinaitis, the Executive Vice President of Talent Relations and Raw Interm General Manager. It has come to my attention that your services will not be needed tonight. Next week will definitely be your week, though, or my name isn't Mr. Excitement."

Not even a phone call this week. Just a simple text was all that was needed to shatter Brodus' dreams. Clay slowly make his way back into his street clothes. No need to stay and watch the show. Might as well head off now and get a jump on the travel. As he leaves the arena and tosses his bags into his car, he gives one last look back. "Next week, Brodus." he tells himself. "Next week will be your week. That is going to be when you leave your mark."

He hops into the car and drives away, ready to leave the night behind him, but not before he ses the Golden Arches up ahead. He decides to stop for one last quick snack to ease his pain.

Creative might not have anything for him but McDonalds always does.