E-wrestling for Cagesiders: [RPW] Wednesday Night Revival #02
by Jon Knapik on Jan 19, 2012 8:00 PM EST
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The second episode of Wednesday Night Revival went out to the RPW email list yesterday, and here it is for anyone interested on Cageside Seats! Revival Pro Wrestling is an e-wrestling fed for Cagesiders that pits your created characters against one another in a quest for glory, gold, and laughs! Every character in the show below is played by a commenter (or lurker) from these pages. If you want in on the action (or just want to watch), email me at jonknapik@gmail.com!
Enjoy the show after the jump
***LAST WEEK… ON WEDNESDAY NIGHT REVIVAL***
♪ OPENING SONG LYRICS ♪
Magenta Moon comes to the ring, talking trash to the camera.
Sketchy Dan takes a forced photo with Harold Murphy
Hakai Dragon enters under a blue spotlight, walking to the ring eagerly despite his hurt back.
Ian Jones is backstage and extends a hand to Hakai Dragon
In succession John Brandenburg, Malcolm Venezuela, Mr. Nice Guy and Damien Wolfe have their entrances shown.
♪ ALWAYS SAID I WOULDN’T BE THAT WAY… ♪
Landon Jackson has his arms raised in victory over Gary Graplin
♪ CAP-SIZED! ♪
Ryan Mercy hits NO MERCY on Lawrence Welk Anderson
♪ CUT DOWN… TO… SIZE ♪
Magenta Moon connects with EQUAL RIGHTS EQUALS FIGHTS on Hakai Dragon
♪ LIKE COLORS BLEED ♪
Ian Jones face is nearly kicked off by Hakai Dragon near the ring entrance.
♪ NOW THEY’RE ALL THE SAME TO ME ♪
Sketchy Dan blasts Magenta Moon with a can of beer, sending her to the mat.
♪ I FEEL HIS HAND ♪
Damien Wolfe and John Brandenburg exchange wild punches
♪ I KNOOOW I’M DAMNED ♪
Malcolm Valenzuela hits a suicide moonsault onto Damien Wolfe and Mr. Nice Guy
♪ A PUPPET ON A STRING ♪
The Flying Slappsman superkicks Jimmy Flame
♪ AND THE MAN BEHIND THE SCREEN ♪
San Diego Martin reveals his protégé El Omega 23 to the world.
The song dies down, and the voice of Harold Murphy plays over a replay of various moments from the main event from last week’s Wednesday Night Revival
MURPHY: Last week history was made as Revival Pro Wrestling’s first event took place! And in the main event, our first champion crowned…
A replay of the final sequence is shown from last week:
Ian Jones leans against the ropes and charges Hakai Dragon’s position. HAKAI DRAGON KIPS UP FROM OUT OF NOWHERE AND HURRICANRANAS IAN JONES ONTO HIS HEAD!!!!! IAN JONES IS DOWN! Hakai Dragon manages to stand, but almost stumbles back down on his bad leg. He leans back sharply holding his back!
MURPHY: What guts! What heart!
GOLDEN: What intestinal fortitude!!
As Ian Jones gets up, Hakai Dragon uses his good leg to SUPERKICK Ian Jones back down to the mat! Ever so slowly, Hakai Dragon goes to the top rope…
GOLDEN: Bad idea!
MURPHY: High-risk maneuver from Hakai Dragon here!
He’s on the top turnbuckle and composes himself. He looks to the sky for a pensive moment before looking back down at his opponent and delivering a SHUDDERING flying elbow drop! Hakai grabs his leg upon impact, but fights through the pain and gets to his feet!
MURPHY: The risk pays off! Is Hakai Dragon going to be the first RPW Iron Man Champion?!
Ian Jones is pulled into a suplex position, and Hakai Dragon gets him up!!!
MURPHY: THE TSUNAMI!!!!!
BUT HAKAI DRAGON STUMBLES UNDER THE WEIGHT OF HIS LEG! IAN JONES LANDS ON HIS FEET! Jones wipes the blood from his face and LICKS IT OFF OF HIS HANDS!!! He laughs maniacally! He pats his forearm and charges Hakai Dragon for a lariat, but THE DRAGON CATCHES HIS ARM AND DRAGS HIM TO THE GROUND! He quickly wraps up Jones’ legs and falls backward into a chinlock!
MURPHY: MUTA LOCK! MUTA LOCK! MUTA LOCK!
GOLDEN: FIGHT IT, IAN! GET TO THOSE ROPES!
Jones reaches out to the ropes! He’s SO CLOSE. He manages to inch slowly over bit by bit!
GOLDEN: SIX MORE INCHES!
Jones rolls a bit, but gets rolled right back! Jones reaches…
Reaches…
Reeeeeaches….
AND TAPS OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
THE CROWD GOES ABSOLUTELY BANANAS! THE CAMERA SHAKES FROM THE ROAR OF THE CROWD! HAKAI DRAGON WINS!
MURPHY: CAN YOU BELIEVE IT, DOM!
GOLDEN: …
DUCKY: YOUR WINNER…. AND NEEEEEEEW REVIVAL PRO IRON MAN CHAMPION… HAAAAAAKAAAAAAAAAI DRAAGOOOOOOON!
The scene then cuts to Hakai celebrating with the RPW Iron Man title as the crowd goes bonkers!
Murphy: Broken and beaten, Hakai Dragon became RPW Iron Man Champion. But for Hakai Dragon, Revival Pro Wrestling and its roster, the journey to glory has just begun.
CONGREGATION…. WELCOME…
TO THE REVIVAL
♪ Opening music ♪
John "The Brand" Brandenburg stretches his students at the Black Knight Gym while barely breaking a sweat. Sketchy Dan is in a dive bar chatting up a girl much younger than him. He spies the camera and offers the cameraman a PBR. Len "’Ard" Knox takes a pint from a bartender and smiles big into the camera. Mr. Nice Guy jumps rope in an empty gym, ever-present smile on his face.
♪ I miss the part, when weee were moving foooorward now ♪
Adam Valenzuela is in front of an RPW-logo bus. He crosses his arms and flashes a big smile. Aron Scythe is working up a sweat in the gym for his comeback wearing an anime T-shirt, taking the time to smile at the camera mid-workout.
♪ (Onnn our way dooown) ♪
Ian Jones bashes away at a punching bag in a dimly lit room, laughing maniacally.
♪ But maaaaaybe someday I'll be something moooore than loooove ♪
A cameraman approaches Magenta Moon, but she is too busy looking at herself in a handheld mirror to notice. Leanna "Sunshine" Moringside greets a camera with a wave and a smile.
♪ Just know I’ll never tell ♪
Brett Bannion is at a bar. He smirks and lifts a shot as a toast.
♪ And when you’re on your way down, ♪
Kirk Cobain is in his room, legs crossed on his bed. He looks up to meet the camera’s gaze.
♪ and you’re waiting for your body’s reentry agaaain ♪
Hakai Dragon brutally assaults Ian Jones with kicks. Hakai applies a Muta Lock to Ian Jones. Hakai Dragon celebrates with the RPW Iron Man title.
♪ We speeeeak in diff-reeent voiceees! ♪
Damien Wolfe and Mr. Nice Guy stand back to back with arms crossed in front of the white and red English flag. Aiden O’Neill hits The Blackout on an unlucky training partner.
♪ When fighting with the ones we’ve loved! ♪
"The Grappler" Gary Graplin successfully tackles an inanimate training dummy while in full wrestling gear. He looks back at the camera with a laughable grimace on his face.
♪ We speeeeak in diff-reeent voiceees! ♪
Punk rock Ryan Mercy is headbanging at a rock show. San Diego Martin stands arms crossed with El Omega 23 towering behind him.
♪ Why can’t we say what we’re thinking oooof? ♪
Landon Jackson stands in front of the penitentiary that just recently held him prisoner. He tosses a punch at the camera, knocking the camera and its operator to the ground, ending the transmission!
The scene switches to the inside New Orleans Arena in New Orleans, LA where the house is packed, and the place is rocking! The camera takes some time to look over the throng going nuts as the second Wednesday Night Revival starts! Some signs, y’all!
‘TINY BUBBLES’ IN MY HEART!
DAMIEN WOLFE = DOMINANCE
WELCOME BACK, ARON SCYTHE!
HAKAI DRAGON - THE IRON MAN OF RPW
SKETCHY DAN HIT ON MY TEENAGE SISTER
MURPHY: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Wednesday Night Revival!!!!
The camera switches to Harold Murphy and "Golden Boy" Dominic Golden seated ringside! Murphy is in his usual suit. Dom on the other hand is going with a yellow and feather motif. His cutoff shirt is yellow with white feathers hanging off and his shades are yellow.
MURPHY: I am Harold Murphy joined by the former wrestling champion and the man that struck out at the bar last week with Sketchy Dan – Dominic Golden!
GOLDEN: Hey, hey, no one struck out, Murph. The Sketch Man just got mixed up. He’s been with a lot of women, ya know.
MURPHY: Oh, I’m aware. I’m also aware that tonight is our historic second show!
GOLDEN: Is every show going to be historic from now on?
MURPHY: YES!
GOLDEN: Okay, good answer.
MURPHY: Tonight we have a killer lineup. In the main event Hakai Dragon defends his RPW Iron Man title against the vicious Landon Jackson
GOLDEN: Oh, and It’s going to be a short reign for "The Iron Dragon"! The man is hurt, his back is messed up, and I don’t think one week of rest is enough time to recover, Murph!
MURPHY: You could be right, Dom, but betting against Hakai Dragon while he is in the face of adversity has bitten you in the past! In our co-main event John "The Brand" Brandenburg takes on Magenta Moon! Should be a great one!
GOLDEN: Moon impressed me last week, but I still think she’s too small to compete. We’ll see if Brandenburg is man enough to show her just that.
MURPHY: Oh, you think you’re man enough?
GOLDEN: I would snap that girl in half, Murph!
MURPHY: Hmph. Well we also have the debut of EL OMEGA 23 against The Flying Slappsman.
GOLDEN: Well I don’t think either of us were impressed with The Slappsman’s debut, NOR his love for barnyard animals.
MURPHY: We spoke off-air about you mentioning that, Dom! Cut it out!
GOLDEN: Alright, alright!
MURPHY: The Slappsman DID win, though; but Diego San Martin’s weapon seems ready! We have that and MORE on Wednesday Night Revival! Let’s get to it!
Sketchy Dan comes out with PBRs in both hands! He twirls around and pours some of the beer down his mouth before crushing the cans and tossing them into the crowd! He slides into the ring and is handed a microphone.
SKETCHY: WHATS UP, DOUCHEBAGS!?!?
The crowd showers Sketchy Dan with boos!
SKETCHY: How is everyone in this awful city?!
The crowd is livid! All of the excitement in the arena has turned to hatred!
SKETCHY: Fantastic. Well I was hoping you slackjaws could help me with something. Who the hell is Ryan Mercy? How did I go from Main-Eventing to fighting this nobody? This guy calls himself a punk but he comes out to Dropkick Murphys? Last I checked, punks don't listen to bands that sellout and plaster their horrific music all over big budget Hollywood Scorsese movies. Maybe I'm giving little Ryan too much credit though in thinking he'd actually know what real punk is. I can't fault him for loving Boston though. Beautiful town with plenty of beautiful girls that I've taken for a ride on the "T"... If you know what I mean.......... I mean I banged them.
Sketchy laughs and soaks in the boos.
SKETCHY: Speaking of banging... Magenta Moon... Oh you lovely, little bastard. You better watch that mouth of yours. You brought in a production team just to tell me how little those 3 stitches meant to you... Long lengths to go to just to try to act "tough". I sincerely hope you are riding your crimson-wave-super-powers this week, so when I show up to ruin your night again, you will at least have SOME defense. And believe me, you WILL be seeing me at some point tonight. Love ya Dollface.
Sunglasses ON.
Sketchy drops the mic and walks out.
MURPHY: What a scumbag! I’m upset we have to see him yet again later tonight against Ryan Mercy!
GOLDEN: He’s the future of RPW, Murph! Get on board, or fall behind!
MURPHY: He is a nuisance and would throw you under the bus the moment it suited him. Well let’s get that taste out of our mouths and get to some action! In our first preliminary bout, Brett Bannion takes on Jimmy Flame!
BRETT BANNION vs. JUMPIN’ JIMMY FLAME
Murphy: Bannion and Flame have made their way to the ring but wait! Last Call Erica has poured her man a shot of whiskey… what a way to start a match! Now Flame is walking over and asking for a shot… generally this sort of thing would happen on Revival After Dark! The two party animals share a toast before the ref rings the bell! The ref has called for the bell, let’s join the action in the ring.
Bannion shakes his head and immediately headbutts Flame after the shot has been downed and the bell rings. Without relenting, Bannion has delivered a European uppercut knocking Flame backwards and follows it up with a bruising short arm clothesline. Flame looks hurt, and Bannion is completely dominating this matchup. It’s like the bell was a wake-up call for him and this dominate beast has emerged from the potentially intoxicated superstar! Bannion has picked up Flame and whipped him into the ropes and immediately drops Flame with a Lou Thesz press and is now pummeling him with right and left and right hands. The ref issues a five count and right before he can be disqualified, Bannion stands up and hits the opposite rope and drops an impressive leg drop on the fallen Flame. It looks like Jimmy Flame is completely out of it, and he never even got out of the blocks as Bannion has been on him since the bell rang with that vicious headbutt. Bannion just pointed to Last Call Erica and gave her the "pour me another shot!" motion. The crowd hears him yell, "This is your last call Flame"! He picks up Flame, puts his head between his legs and lifts him up and unceremoniously drops him down with a jackknife powerbomb. Immediately, he locks in a scissored armbar he calls "The Greasetrap". Flame is completely out and the ref checks his arm and quickly calls for the bell.
Ducky: YOUR WINNER… BY KNOCKOUT, BRETT BANNNNNIIIIOOOOONNNNN!!!!!!
MURPHY: Impressive victory yet again for Brett Bannion! After two wins in two weeks is the brawler next up for the RPW Iron Man title?
GOLDEN: Naaah, look at the quality of opponents he’s beaten: a toilet-bowl cleaner and a Whitesnake groupie. And SPEAKING of people that don’t belong in the ring – how is it that Lawrence Welk Anderson got a match last week?! Did we figure that out? Janitors and band-leader impressionists are slipping through the cracks, Murph!
MURPHY: Well it seems like he was scheduled for an accounting job and ‘forged’ some documents to get into a wrestling match. It has always been a dream of his! Speaking of LW Anderson, he will be hosting REVIVAL AFTER DARK tonight, so stay tuned for that immediately following Wednesday Night Revival!
GOLDEN: The ratings for that are going to be an all-time low, gua-ran-teed! How does he still have a job?! He lied to RPW officials!!
MURPHY: The people have requested it, and Commissioner Dobbs listens to the people!
Don Ho – "Tiny Bubbles"
GOLDEN: !!!
MURPHY: Speaking of listening to the people, listen to that response from the audience, Dom! Here he comes now!
LAWRENCE WELK ANDERSON saunters out from behind the entrance curtain and – according-a-blazing – slowly makes his way to ringside.
GOLDEN: NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO! MURPH!
MURPHY: The crowd is electric for Lawrence Welk Anderson! Did I fail to mention that he would be joining us on commentary for the next match, Dom?
GOLDEN: That freak isn’t sitting next to me!
LW Anderson steadily makes his way to ringside as the crowd sings "Tiny Bubbles" along with Don Ho and Lawrence Welk Anderson! LW gets right in front of Golden on the opposite side of the table and sways back and forth playing his accordion! Dominic Golden stands and points at Lawrence!
GOLDEN: You’d better watch your tone with that joke of an instrument, Anderson!
LW loses his smile, but plays ferociously at Dominic! Golden is taken a bit aback.
GOLDEN: Whoa.
MURPHY: Don’t mess with a man with an accordion, Dom!
Golden has a seat, but throws one more warning point at Anderson. LW sets his accordion gently on the timekeeper’s table and takes his seat next to Harold Murphy.
MR. NICE GUY vs. "THE GRAPPLER" GARY GRAPLIN
Throughout the match Harold Murphy speaks to LW Anderson, but LW doesn’t say a word! For some reason, Murphy understands the silence and can read his reactions… which only pisses off Dominic Golden. The bell rings, and Gary starts the match by offering his hand to MNG, who looks tentatively at Gary then accepts the show of sportsmanship with a suspicious smile. There is a clean break and the two competitors lock up with a collar and elbow tie up which Gary turns into a rear waistlock and promptly gets elbowed in the mouth breaking the hold. Gary looks puzzled at MNG who shrugs and kicks "The Grappler" in the gut before whipping him to the ropes and delivering a ferocious spine buster to the NCAA Division IV standout. MNG picks "The Grappler" up and puts him in a front facelock. Before he can deliver the DDT, Gary drops to his knees and swipes MNG’s legs out from under him, then immediately attempts to lock in the cross armbreaker. Before he can lock it in, MNG punches him and then shoves him across the ring. MNG gets to his feet and Gary runs towards him and gets dropkicked in the chops. MNG bounces right up after delivering the drop kick and stomps Gary in the chest three times before he picks him up and whips him in the corner. Gary stumbles out of the corner dazed and MNG bounces off the ropes and delivers a picture perfect bulldog.
MNG now points to the corner, and the fans respond with a mix of cheers and boos. Gary is set up perfectly for a high risk move and MNG jumps up to the top rope, looks down at Gary and executes a stunning 450 splash. The crowd is impressed with the maneuver despite Mr. Nice Guy’s actions last week! MNG rolls off Gary, gets to his feet while holding his midsection, selling the move but looking to the crowd one more time. Half the crowd is behind the underdog "Grappler" as Mr. Nice Guy looks down at Gary. One can see he is contemplating his next move and instead of inflicting more punishment, he pins "The Grappler" for the easy 1-2-3.
Ducky: YOUR WINNER….. MISTER NICE GUY!!!!
Mr. Nice Guy stands and just smiles down at his felled opponent before leaving the ring.
MURPHY: Mr. Nice Guy looked spectacular in that matchup, Dom. I still don’t know about that Mr. Nice Guy, though…
GOLDEN: You don’t trust anyone, you paranoid old coot. These British guys are taking the RPW by storm!
MURPHY: Poor Gary Graplin falls to 0-2 on the year despite looking like he is trying really, really hard.
GOLDEN: Well at least he got a move in this week, sheesh. Last week Landon Jackson killed the little guy.
MURPHY: Can Jackson do the same to Hakai Dragon in our main event tonight?
GOLDEN: Hard to count a guy like Hakai out after his performance last week, but Landon Jackson had a much easier road to victory.
MURPHY: He took shortcuts; and what’s sick about the whole thing is that there is no way he needed to attack Gary before the match to win!
GOLDEN: That’s true, but he did it, and that’s that.
MURPHY: Landon Jackson gets off on hurting people. They should throw him back in the pen.
GOLDEN: He’s probably going to see this, Murph! I wouldn’t be saying things like that!
MURPHY: Well I said what I said. Let’s go backstage with Brandy Swinson and newcomer Kirk Cobain to see what Kirk has to say about his match tonight with Damien Wolfe!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The camera follows Brandy Swanson to the door of one of the men’s locker rooms. Brandy looks back over her shoulder and smiles before knocking at the door. There's no response.
SWINSON: Kirk? Kirk Cobain? Brandy Swanson here for your pre-match interview.
Brandy knocks again, harder this time. The camera pans to the sound guy who shrugs his shoulders.
SWINSON: Ok, ready or not I'm going to open the locker room door.
Just as Brandy reaches for the door it opens. It's Kirk Cobain.
COBAIN: Hey Brandy have you got any AA batteries on you?
SWINSON What? Why do you want AA batteries?
COBAIN: Oh for my walkman. Yeah. The batteries died on the way here; after my car stereo got stolen I use it to listen to music when I'm driving.
SWINSON: Kirk, you've got a match tonight against a vicious competitor in Damien Wolfe.
Brandy looks at Kirk in confusion for the second time in as many minutes.
SWINSON: Let's put the walkman to one side for a few minutes to talk about your upcoming fight. You did see last week's Revival Pro Wrestling show, surely?
COBAIN: Yeah, I caught most of it, only I was at a friend's house and his TV reception isn't all that good. Damien Wolfe is that dude from the UK, right?
SWINSON: From Wolverhampton in the UK, correct. He's a technical wrestler, he's a clear 15 lbs. heavier than you, and he's already proven how vicious a competitor he is inside the squared circle. He and his partner lost by a small margin against the tag team of Brandenburg and Valenzuela last week.
Brandy sits down next to Kirk on a wooden bench.
SWINSON: Kirk, after the match he used a steel chair in an attempt to beat John Brandenburg clear into the emergency room. Why did you even take this match?
COBAIN: Well it was this or help a friend out by roadying for his band. And they probably wouldn't have let me sleep in the van either. I figured that however bad this guy is, it can't be worse than dragging gear around or trying to find a place to sleep, and it sure pays better. I gotta get some money together to pay my rent and fix a window that some asshole threw a can of PBR through last week. If I win tonight that ought to cover it.
SWINSON: Kirk.
Brandy looks at Kirk with either sympathy or pity. Sketchy Dan pokes his head into the door!
SKETCHY: Kirk should be stoked. Free beer isn't easy to come by for broke scumbags like him. Get a job, asshole. And no one cares about Mudhoney anymore. Later, sluts.
Sketchy laughs like a dick and walks off.
SWINSON: Ugh, what a jerk. I’m sorry, Kirk.
COBAIN: Everyone's entitled to their opinion, man. He's totally wrong about Mudhoney, though.
SWINSON: Damien Wolfe is here to prove to the world that he is the very best at what he does. You're here to pay the bills. Why should the crowd get behind you?
COBAIN: I dunno, Brandy. I'm going to go out there and give it everything I got. I'm not a faker, I'm as real as it gets. You can call me old-fashioned, you can say the bands I like all suck now, but all I got is this one chance. I don't even like my friend's band. At least I get to hear my own music tonight.
Kirk gets up off the bench and walks out of shot, while Brandy turns to face the camera.
SWINSON: Kirk Cobain, ladies and gentlemen. He's got plenty of fighting spirit, and he wants to make something of himself. I think we can get behind that.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
MURPHY: Thanks you, Ms. Swinson! Kirk Cobain may not look like much, but I’ve seen this kid take a beating and keep on like it didn’t happen.
GOLDEN: Yeah, but it takes more than that to make a wrestler, Murph! Damien Wolfe is going to MURDER this kid; and a lot of the fault – no, ALL of the fault – is going to be on you for recruiting him into Revival Pro Wrestling.
MURPHY: Commissioner Dobbs could have vetoed…
GOLDEN: Ah, he respects you too much for that, Murph. Don’t play dumb. Damien Wolfe is going to end the ‘career’ of Kirk Cobain, and he’s going to wish he was a roadie for anyone rather than be stuck in a hospital with his jaw wired shut.
MURPHY: I have faith! Well folks, with the preliminary bouts out of the way, the main card for Wednesday Night Revival begins!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Scene opens in a locker room backstage. Mr. Nice Guy and Damien Wolfe are preparing for their respective matches. Mr. Nice Guy is whitening his teeth, while Damien Wolfe wraps his wrists in tape.
In walks Ian Jones, he struts into the room with a mean look in his eyes. Both MNG and Wolfe stop what they're doing immediately and stare at him in the eyes. Jones has a wry smile on his face.
JONES: Good match last week lads.
With a nod of approval Ian walks away while Mr. Nice Guy and Wolfe silently acknowledge his compliment.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
MURPHY: Strange, is there some sort of alliance forming among the British wrestlers on the roster?
GOLDEN: Maybe! While I can’t imagine Ian Jones playing nice with no one, Wolfe and Nice Guy looked great together last week. MNG also looked great tonight. Maybe these three have been training together for some time, and we’re just now getting wind of it.
MURPHY: As good as all three men looked, all three LOST last week on Wednesday Night Revival! With as highly-touted as the Revival Pro Wrestling imports were, this has to be a disappointment for British fans and the wrestlers alike.
GOLDEN: It’s one freakin’ week! John Brandenburg had to use an illegal choke to defeat Mr. Nice Guy and Wolfe…
MURPHY: Now, now! Commissioner Dobbs approved The Signature Brand for competition! It’s a blood choke, which is perfectly legal.
GOLDEN: The way he has his arms around the throat of an opponent, there’s no way for Dobbs to tell what’s going on there! It’s an illegal move whether it’s approved by the head office or not! Damien Wolfe may need to talk to a lawyer – he could have a good case against The Brand and even RPW!
MURPHY: A lawsuit? Now you’re just being absurd!
GOLDEN: No, not a lawsuit; but maybe they can get a ruling to have the move reviewed by an athletic commission and ruled an illegal choke!
MURPHY: Well why not ban sleeper holds then?
GOLDEN: Oh, now who’s being silly, Murph?!
MURPHY: *sigh*
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: Ladies and gentleman, out next match is scheduled for one fall! First, hailing from Silverlake, California by way of… your mother’s vagina… ugh….
CROWD: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
DUCKY: SKEETCHYYYYYYYY DAAAAAAN!
The opening music from "Genesis" plays for a while and Sketchy Dan is nowhere to be found!
MURPHY: Where is this clown?
GOLDEN: He’s probably on an important call.
MURPHY: Yeah, I’m sure he has a lot of those.
The beat drops and Sketchy Dan slowly walks out from the entrance curtain, though his face is covered by a pair of black Ray Bans and a hoodie! He is totally transfixed by an iPad that’s in his hands, and is walking very slowly to the ring, not acknowledging a very hostile crowd! Dan starts strutting and dancing a bit to the music, but he hasn’t looked up from whatever he is doing on his iPad!
MURPHY: Totally unprofessional! His attack on Magenta Moon last week was a travesty, and now he’s coming to the ring and could care less!
GOLDEN: Turnabout is fair play, Murph!
Dan is also in black skinny jeans and vans. He sighs heavily and looks up as he reaches the ring apron. He acts like he just realized he was amidst thousands of people! Dan pulls out a PBR and cracks it open, chugging it as his steps near the timekeeper! He chucks the empty into the audience and hands the timekeeper his iPad! He is obviously threatening the timekeeper for some reason!
MURPHY: What did the timekeeper do?!
GOLDEN: He’s telling the guy –
MURPHY: You know his name is Brad!
GOLDEN: He’s telling BRAD that if anything happens to his iPad, that Dan is going to wreck him!
MURPHY: Despicable.
GOLDEN: Those things cost a pretty penny, Murph.
Dan takes off his leather jacket and hoodie and tosses them in the face of the timekeeper before rolling into the ring.
DUCKY: And his opponent…
Dropkick Murphys – "The Gauntlet"
DUCKY: From Boston, Massachusetts and weighing in at 265 lbs….
Alternating lights compliment the pulsing bass at the beginning of The Gauntlet by The Dropkick Murphys fills the arena. The crowd cheers as Ryan Mercy runs out from the entrance curtain and surveys the crowd with a smile!
DUCKY: RYAAAAAAAAAAAN MEEERCYYYYYYYY!
He’s wearing a leather jacket over a sleeveless African-style tiger striped shirt, orange wrestling tights and black boots! He moves back and forth between fans on both sides of the entrance ramp.
MURPHY: Ryan Mercy! The crowd loves this guy, Dom!
GOLDEN: They do, but he’s going to have his hands full tonight with Sketchy Dan. While we were out partying…
MURPHY: HA!
GOLDEN: WHILE WE WERE OUT PARTYING he told me some of the secrets he was going to use to defeat Ryan Mercy tonight. Some high-level thinking going on in that head of his.
MURPHY: Well Ryan Mercy had a few words for Sketchy Dan earlier this evening! Let’s check it out!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
The scene opens backstage as crew members are running around getting ready for the start of the show. Sitting on top of a large shipping container is Boston superstar Ryan Mercy. His tiger-striped hair hangs over his black bandana shadowing his face. The camera looks up at him, partially silhouetting him in the lights high above. He speaks with an intoned Boston accent.
MERCY: Anothah Wednesday Night Revival, and it’s a new night. I'm not the kind of guy who dwells on the past. I'm the kind of guy who looks to the fewtcha. I don't see tonight. I don't even see Sketchy Dan who steps into the ring tonight with the Bahstan Brawlah. I see the future of Revival... and the future is Ryan Mercy. Theyas a few tings you have to undahstand about me...
Ryan throws his hair back.
MERCY: I'm not heah to hurt guys... but I will. I'm not heah to win championships... but I will. I'm heah to be the fewcha of this spoat and be the greatest professional wrestlah of awl time. I'll stop anyone who stand in my way of the fewcha, and this week it happens to be Sketchy Dan.
Ryan smiles.
MERCY: So go ahead and drink yah beeah, Dan. Do whateva it takes to dull the pain. You don't hafta get hut. You don't even hafta talk. You just gotta fight and yah gotta lose. I'm walkin outa Revival tonight with a win. That's just the way we do it wayah I'm from. So tommorah when you wake up and look back on owah match and try to make sense of what happened... you can remembah this: Mercy is my last name for a reason, but that reason ain't you.
Mercy stands up and walks off camera.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
GOLDEN: Could you understand a word of that, Murph?
MURPHY: Of course I could, what do you mean?
GOLDEN: That accent is like nails on a chalkboard! Ugh!
Mercy takes off his jacket and tosses it aside. He runs, jumps, and baseball slides into the ring in an impressive show of agility from the big man! Dan leans in a corner and looks bored as Ryan Mercy gets up on a turnbuckle and looks over the sea of cheering fans. He then walks by Dan, points at him, and goes up on another turnbuckle to cheer! Dan has seen enough and rushes over and forearms him in the back, taking him down from the turnbuckle!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
GOLDEN: Sketchy Dan wasting no time!
MURPHY: Is that one of the big ‘secrets’, Dom?
GOLDEN: It’s ‘A’ secret, yes, you condescending old grump.
Forearm, forearm, forearm! Ryan Mercy is hunched over for a moment before standing up and ROARING at Sketchy Dan! Dan looks worried and rolls out of the ring. Dan casually strolls by the announcing booth and kneels by Dominic Golden. Golden whispers some things in Dan’s ear, and Dan seems to agree!
MURPHY: What the hell are you doing? Making plans for after the show, I suppose.
GOLDEN: None of your beeswax, Murph.
Ryan Mercy is in the ring, telling Dan to get in the ring! The referee starts to count Sketchy Dan out! Dan hurriedly runs to Harold Murphy, kisses him on the forehead, and slides back into the ring!
MURPHY: ACK!
The two wrestlers size each other up, and they lock up! Mercy is much stronger and muscles Dan around the ring before locking in a butterfly and suplexing Sketchy Dan up and over!
MURPHY: Perfect mix of technical skill and brute strength!
GOLDEN: Hey, this Mercy hits the gym, for sure, I can appreciate that!
Mercy engages Dan as he stands up and locks him up again, this time into a vertical suplex! Up Dan goes… and stays! Ryan Mercy is holding him in a stalling vertical suplex, and Dan is helpless against the brute strength of Ryan Mercy! Finally after a seemingly eternity, the two come crashing down and Mercy is quick to follow with a pin!
1…
2…..
Kickout!
Mercy shakes his head and applies a grounded headlock to the Silverlake, CA native.
MURPHY: All Mercy in the early-going. He had an easy time with Lawrence Welk Anderson last week, and he seems to be having a easy time with Sketchy Dan this week!
GOLDEN: Well I still have Dan winning this, but Ryan Mercy hasn’t fought a big guy like Ian Jones or Diego San Martin’s guy yet. When he’s outmatched in the strength department, I think we’ll see things potentially going differently for Mercy in the ring!
Dan rolls back and forth, but can’t seem to get Mercy to roll! Dan manages to get his toes on a rope, and Ryan Mercy breaks the hold. Dan adjusts his neck and bit and stands up cautiously. Neither man is breathing heavily, but Mercy has been unscathed so far. Dan puts a hand up into the sky in front of Ryan Mercy. Mercy looks at Dan quizzically.
MURPHY: It looks like the skinniest wrestler on the roster is challenging Ryan Mercy to a test of strength??
GOLDEN: I don’t know about this one, Sketchy Dan.
Ryan Mercy laughs and goes to grab the hand, but Dan pulls his hand down and INTO THE EYES of Ryan Mercy! The referee is all over Dan, and Dan is telling the ref he had his fist closed, so he couldn’t have poked his eyes! He apologizes for the illegal punch, and the referee allows the fight to continue, but warns him against closed fists in the future! Ryan Mercy holds his eye and Sketchy Dan starts putting the boots to Mercy’s midsection! Dan throws a few ineffectual chops to Mercy before running against the ropes and CLIPPING Mercy’s knee! Mercy goes down hard clutching his leg while squinting his eyes!
GOLDEN: Boom! Sketchy Dan using his noggin’!
MURPHY: And his fingers to gouge Mercy’s eyes!
Dan goes up to the top rope, and the crowd is all over him with taunts and boos! He grabs his crotch and flies off the top buckle with a flying elbow drop! Mercy’s legs fly up from the connection!
GOLDEN: What impact!
MURPHY: Right across the sternum of Mercy! The difference in strength makes no difference when a guy flies ten feet up and down into your chest! AND DAN GOES FOR THE PIN!
1…
2…..
Kickout!
Dan stands up and blows a snot rocket onto Mercy! The referee moves in, but Dan ignores him and pulls Mercy to his feet by his hair. Dan kicks the knee that he clipped earlier and Mercy can barely stand on it! Against the ropes and RUNNING DROPKICK to Mercy who stumbles backwards and is now tangled up in the ropes on the side next to the announcer’s table!
MURPHY: Mercy is tied up now, and this is not good for Ryan Mercy!
GOLDEN: Sketchy Dan told me he was going to do that! He told me EXACTLY how this match would go down! Brilliant!
MURPHY: Your lies are obvious to everyone at home, Dom!
Dan barks something at the timekeeper, and a beat later a PBR flies into the ring! Dan runs back a bit and catches it! He pops it open and takes a swig before the referee confiscates it! Dan can’t believe what is happening and starts berating the referee! RYAN MERCY IS LOOSE! Mercy tries to charge across the ring, but is slow on one leg and probably would have fallen on his own had Dan not delivered a dropkick to the knee! THE COVER!
1…
2…..
Kickout!
MURPHY: I’ll tell you this right now – it’s going to take more than that to put away Ryan Mercy!
Dan glares at the referee and talks some trash before bringing Mercy to his feet. Wild right to the jaw! Another one! Dan uses the entirety of his body to get Ryan Mercy into the corner! He grabs Mercy’s face and talks more smack before SPITTING IN HIS FACE!
MURPHY: Disgusting!
GOLDEN: Mercy probably had some dirt or something on his face, and Dan wanted to help clean it up!
Mercy wipes the spit from his face and shoves Dan backwards! Dan charges back in and Mercy delivers a REVERSE STO and Dan flies face-first into the turnbuckle! The crowd goes nuts! Mercy limps a small circle to try and help his leg out and then peels Dan off of the buckle.
GOLDEN: People don’t like being spat on, Murph. Maybe Dan was trying to make Mercy lose his temper to throw him off his game!
MURPHY: Well it certainly awoke something in Mercy!
Ryan Mercy launches a volley of left-handed punches to the breadbasket of Sketchy Dan! Dan is reeling, and then a LEFT CROSS twirls Dan around like he was hit from a bullet! Still standing and dazed, Dan is helpless as Mercy gingerly moves against the ropes and BACK AT DAN WITH A BIG BOOT! Dan goes sailing out of the ring, and Mercy drops to a knee to nurse his knee that is giving him problems!
MURPHY: Those knee attacks from Dan did the trick, but right now Sketchy Dan is slow to lift himself from the unforgiving ground outside the ring.
Dan pulls a steel chair from under the ring, and lobs it into the ring near Mercy! AND ANOTHER CHAIR IN THE RING! Mercy grabs one and says "Bring it on!", but the referee grabs it and tosses outside on the opponent end of the ring. Mercy has the other chair now, and the referee warns Mercy before taking that one away as well. With the referee’s back turned Sketchy Dan slides into the ring and tries to low blow Ryan Mercy, but Mercy sees it coming and catches his small arm inches away from its destination!
MURPHY: He telegraphed that one, Dom! Ryan Mercy has done his homework.
Ryan Mercy smiles down at Sketchy Dan as the referee tells and attendant to take care of the chairs AND DAN JUST LIFTS HIS OTHER ARM INTO THE GROIN OF RYAN MERCY!
CROWD: OOOOOOOOH!
The referee turns to see Ryan Mercy on his back and holding his crotch! Dan stands and dusts himself off.
GOLDEN: Dan has better be careful, he was DQ’d last week for that same move!
MURPHY: Against a woman, no less.
Dan starts viciously stomping Mercy in the face, and Mercy soon starts bleeding from the forehead! Sketchy deftly leaps up onto a top turnbuckle in one movement and !!!!!!!!!!!!
SHOOTING STAR PRESS and the impact was perfect! The referee is down to make the count!
1…
2…..
Kickout!
Dan is up and kicks the bottom rope in frustration! Dan pulls Mercy up by his hair again and hits him with a punch! MERCY RESPONDS with one of his own! Dan felt that one, but comes back and KICKS Mercy in his injured knee! MERCY STAYS STANDING! Right jab to Dan! And another! And another!
MURPHY: What heart being shown by the Bostonian!
DISCUS PUNCH AND DAN STUMBLES BACK! Now Sketchy Dan is tied up in the ropes!!! Mercy nods and smiles, and the crowd cheers! Dan shakes his head and repeats "NO!" over and over! Mercy lifts Dan up by his feet and locks on an achilles lock while Dan’s arms are tied in the ropes! Dan screams out in agony!
MURPHY: Modified version of his Tiger Trap submission maneuver!
GOLDEN: Brutal submission, but he can’t win like this! Dan is in the ropes!
The referee counts and Mercy has to let go. Dan falls out of the ropes and is howling in pain! Mercy calls out for THE POUNCE! The crowd cheers as he moves to the apron! He jumps up to the top rope to springboard off when Sketchy Dan desperately gets to a knee and GRABS THE TOP ROPE! Mercy flips over and crashes hard onto the mat! Dan makes the cover WITH HIS FEET ON THE ROPES! THE REFEREE DOESN’T SEE IT!
1…
2…..
NO!
The referee notices the legs on the ropes at the last possible moment! Dan kicks Ryan Mercy in the face, and the crowd lets him know what they think of his actions!
MURPHY: What a match to start the main card! Dan is using every trick in the book to try and best Ryan Mercy!
GOLDEN: He’s got him right where he wants him now, Murph!
Again Dan goes to the top rope! As Mercy gets to his feet, Dan flies halfway across the ring into a DIVING TORNADO DDT! The timing is perfect and Mercy is planted squarely on his head! Mercy isn’t moving!
GOLDEN: What agility! What a move from Sketchy Dan!
Dan immediately lifts his opponent back to his feet and SITOUT FACEBUSTER!!!
GOLDEN: SKETCH-FACTOR! Er… I mean SKETCHY SLAM!
Dan rolls Mercy over and makes the pin:
1…
2…..
3!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
Sketchy Dan starts doing spins in the ring with his arms out, and the crowd really is hot! He stops and catches his breath, wincing in pain. Dan s\ smiles and then grimaces as the referee lifts his arm in victory! Dan moves to Timekeeper Brad and stares him down as Brad hands him his things. Dan puts on his jacket and hoodie and opens a fresh PBR and gets back into the ring to celebrate!
GOLDEN: What a finish! What a guy!
MURPHY: I’d like to see him wrestle a match where he didn’t have to stoop to trickery or outright cheating.
GOLDEN: What match were you watching?!
MURPHY: Anyhow, Newcomer Aron Scythe makes his debut on Revival After Dark against Leonard Knox! Let’s go backstage where he has some words for RPW fans!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
We cut backstage to see Aron Scythe wearing a silver ring jacket, a black "Big Bang Theory" T-shirt, and his white wrestling tights with a blue flames on them. He smiles for the camera an eager look in his eyes behind the glasses. He smiles for the camera taking a moment to point to the "Revival Pro Wrestling" banner overhead.
SCYTHE: Hiya Toonsters… I know you’re enjoying this week’s Wednesday Night Revival, but don’t forget to stick around for Revival After Dark because tonight I’ll be in the ring for the first time in almost eight years! And I’m going to be taking on one of the toughest men in the locker room - Leonard Knox. It’s going to be a battle of technique vs. fisticuffs, speed vs. power, ring savvy vs. raw physical toughness. This is a match worthy of being a main event in any building in the country…
Except this one. Apparently… not to take anything away from this show right here.
Aron pauses for a moment as if that came out a little more awkwardly than he planned.
SCYTHE: Now as I prepare to lace up my boots I know for a fact there are critics and doubters out there. I know there are the kind of people who are going to say that married life has made me soft. I know there are the kinds of people that will say I’m past my prime and not relevant. But I’m not going to let the Dominic Goldens of the world get to me.
SCYTHE: I’ll be the first to say that I’m a little banged up and I’m no longer the kid who did stardust presses night after night any more, but this time out of the ring has given me something I’ve never had before. When you’ve been in the ring for years and suddenly find yourself on the outside looking in it brings a level of perspective to how you study your fellow grapplers. Last week when I saw Hakai Dragon win the Ironman Championship I knew that I made the right decision when I accepted Jack Dobbs invitation because as I studied that four-man match I knew this place provided the best competition in the world and I knew I could still hang with the elite. Plus I’ll be having a good time doing it.
So fans as you say in the great city of New Orleans, "Laissez les bons temps rouler!!"
Aron thrusts his fist into the air enthusiastically smiling at the camera before we fade to black.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
MURPHY: Scythe may be new to RPW, but he’s been around the block! He has a charm the fans are sure to love!
GOLDEN: What was that dig on me, huh? What did I ever say about that little nerd?
MURPHY: Perhaps it was a preemptive strike on an assault he knew was coming.
GOLDEN: Well he’d better watch his tone around me! I can bench 500 pounds, and I’m a veteran as well. You think I’m far removed from the ring, but it’s only been a few years, Murph!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: The next match is scheduled for one fall with a 15 minute time limit! First…
Super Evil – "Indian War Signs"
DUCKY: Hailing from Reading, England and weighing in at 208 lbs….. THE FLYIIIIIIING SLAPPSMAAAAN!
The Flying Slappsman comes out with a towel over his face as he looks at the floor. Wearing a black wrestling singlet with a clown motif, he looks to the ground as he walks straight to the ring without paying attention to the crowd’s taunts, most of which are unrepeatable. He enters the ring under the bottom rope and takes off the towel. He sits down cross-legged in one of the corners and cracks his knuckles which are covered in black weightlifter gloves.
GOLDEN: It’s surprising how chicken-molesting can make you so moody.
The lights slowly start dimming as the arena fades into silence and eventually darkness, time starts to pass in darkness and the audience starts to react in anticipation
MURPHY: Much anticipation for this debut of Diego San Martin and his masked wrestler!
Finally a white letters flash brightly in the big screen, the voice of a woman can be heard reading them aloud.
RESISTANCE IS FUTILE
Nightwish – "The End of all Hope"
Both Diego and his associate walk through the curtain, as the lights slowly start to rise while them go down the ramp, with more illumination we can see that Diego is carrying his trademark black folding chair high in the air and he's wearing his usual black suit, Omega looks pumped with his custom basketball jersey numbered 23, fight shorts and feline lucha mask on and ready for battle.
DUCKY: Accompanied to the ring by "The Alpha Brain" Diego San Martin, from somewhere in South America, weighing in at 110 kilograms. He is EL OMEGA VAIN-TEE-TRES!!!
MURPHY: El Omega 23 has arrived!
GOLDEN: Wow, these two look all business!
The two walk straight to the ring, and Diego sets up his chair at ringside while Omega slides inside the squared circle.
!!! DING DING DING !!!
The Flying Slappsman charges Omega, but Omega sidesteps! The Slappsman turns around only to be met by a huge forearm to the face! The Slappsman crumples in the corner as Diego San Martin knowingly nods outside the ring.
GOLDEN: Ya see Diego over there? He knows what his man is capable of. It has to be a delight for him for his guy to finally debut. And what a specimen!
MURPHY: DSM certainly has his man in tip-top shape!
The Flying Slappsman stands, but Omega just shoves him back into the corner and kicks him straight in the sternum! The look on Slappsman’s face is pure pain as his grimaces and is forced into the same position he was in as he entered the ring. El Omega 23 is all over him, pulling him to his feet. Big Irish whip into the corner! The Flying Slappsman manages to backflip off of the top turnbuckle as Omega charges, but Omega manages to stop before he hits the turnbuckle. As he turns around The Flying Slappsman hits a boot to the midsection! And another! EL OMEGA 23 JUST STANDS THERE UNAFFECTED!
MURPHY: Oh my, those kicks had no effect!!
GOLDEN: You ever seen a man get kicked like that and not even blink?!
Omega lunges at Slappsman and grabs him in a Thai plum clinch and swings with a hard European uppercut that spins The Slappsman like a top. El Omega 23 tosses The Slappsman into the ropes and MISSES A CLOTHESLINE! The Slappsman now jumps for a flying crossbody, but is CAUGHT IN MIDAIR! Omega throws the acrobat into the air and DOWN into a gutbuster! Before TheSlappsman can fall, El Omega stand him up and flips him over with a CRUSHING lariat! The Slappsman lands on the back of his head and is barely moving!
MUPRHY: HOLY COW what a move!
He goes down for the pin and the referee follows!
1…
2…..
KICKOUT!
Diego San Martin is shouting something in Spanish at El Omega 23 now! Omega nods and drags The Hapless Slappsman to his feet in a chokehold! The referee warns him, and El Omega 23 obliges by releasing him into a sitout powerbomb!!! Then immediately lifts him again with a choke and into ANOTHER SITOUT POWERBOMB!
GOLDEN: Whoooaaa, call it ref!
He doesn’t bother to pin The Slappsman, instead dragging him to his feet and EFFORTLESSLY throwing him over his shoulders! He tosses his opponent up a bit and then DOWN into THE OMEGA CUTTER!
MURPHY: WHAT A MOVE!
The pin!
1…
2…..
3!
Nightwish – "The End of all Hope"
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: Here is your winner… EL OMEGAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA VAIN-EEE-TREEEEESSSS!!!!!!
Diego San Martin smiles and claps as he joins El Omega 23 in the ring. The referee goes to lift El Omega 23’s hand, but DSM gets in between the two and raises his arm himself!
MURPHY: WOW. Well, that was quite the debut, Dom!
GOLDEN: That was incredible! Who can stop this guy?
DSM and El Omega 23 exit the ring by Dom and Murph.
SAN MARTIN: RESISTENCIA ES INÚTIL! RESISTENCIA ES INÚTIL!
The two men walk to the back to a mixed reaction from the crowd. Medics rush out and try to revive the unconscious Flying Slappsman. After a moment, they take him out on a stretcher!
MURPHY: El Omega 23 sure did a number on The Flying Slappsman!
GOLDEN: And I think Diego San Martin invited us over for tacos after the match!
MURPHY: They’re from South America, Dom, not Mexico.
GOLDEN: Oh what, they don’t have tacos in South America?
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
We switch to a video! The video begins with aerial footage of a forest while the voiceover plays.
VOICE: Everyone always asks, "If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around, does it make a sound?"
Video changes to footage of a giant tree falling amongst other giant trees, a resounding boom echoes and shakes the camera.
VOICE: The noise the tree makes does not matter. You should be asking yourself, "who’s tree was it that fell, who it awakened and how do you think he feels?"
Video changes again to show a giant axe embedded in a stone pillar as the voice continues.
VOICE: The tree has fallen. A sleeping giant has awoken. Rage is his only emotion… It may be a revival for the faithful but what of those who have lost their faith?
Video fades to black on the axe blade embedded in the stone.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
GOLDEN: What was that? Is a tree debuting in RPW soon?
MURPHY: Why don’t you try saying something constructive for once!
GOLDEN: What’d I say??
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: Our next match is scheduled for one fall with a 15 minute time limit… first!
DUCKY: Weighing in at 225 lbs. and hailing from Wolverhampton, England….
Damien Wolfe walks out from the entrance curtain wearing long, gold tights with black trim, black knee pads, and boots, and an intense look upon his face.
DUCKY: DAAAAMIEEEEEEEEN WOOOOOOLFFFFFE!
Wolfe walks straight to the ring only pausing once to glare at a fan heckling him! The fan shuts right up, and Wolfe walks to the ring and slides in.
MURPHY: Well here is Damien Wolfe! He looks phenomenal in defeat last week on Wednesday Night Revival!
GOLDEN: He sure did, and now it looks like he’s ready to take his frustration of losing out on poor Kirk Cobain!
DUCKY: And his opponent…
Love Battery – "Half Past You"
DUCKY: Weighing 210 lbs, from Seattle, Washington… KIRK COOOOBAAAAAAAIN!
Kirk Cobain emerges from the ring entrance with his bleach-blonde-covered head lowered. He has a flannel shirt, ripped jeans, and black wrestling boots on and sort of shuffles to the ring.
GOLDEN: Get a haircut!
MURPHY: Okay, I won’t abide you chiding this young man in his debut! Have some respect!
Cobain has his hands in his pockets, and the crowd actually is cheering him! He stops to bop to the music a bit before taking his hands out of his pocket to play a little air guitar! The crowd loves it!
MURPHY: The crowd in full support of Kirk Cobain as Damien Wolfe just shakes his head!
GOLDEN: It just goes to show you how all of the peons go after the lowest common denominator to cheer to make themselves feel better.
MURPHY: I’m not even going to touch that one.
Cobain slides into the ring and Wolfe gets into position, ready to fight!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
Cobain looks to lock up, but Damien Wolfe falls and lands a drop toe hold! Cobain falls to the ground and Wolfe jumps to a headlock. Cobain struggles for a moment before reaching a rope.
MURPHY: He’s not fundamentally sound quite yet, but by all accounts Kirk Cobain is a bit of a wrestling phenomenon in that he picks things up very quickly! His trainers gush over him.
GOLDEN: They GUSH over him? Sick!
Cobain looks to lock up again, but Wolfe isn’t having it! Wolfe arm drags him over and stares down at Kirk as his applies a step-over armbar! Cobain grunts and struggles, but manages to move Wolfe enough to get a leg on the ropes. Wolfe breaks, but immediately starts stomping his overmatched foe!
GOLDEN: I bet Damien Wolfe feels insulted. From going to wrestling John Brandenburg to this!
As Cobain stands, Damien Wolfe bounds against the opposite ropes and at Cobain! He goes for a clothesline, but Cobain ducks it and goes around him for a CRUCIFIX PIN!!!!
1…
2…..
KICKOUT!
Wolfe rolls around to his knees and smiles in disbelief, shaking his head. Cobain waits for him to stand!
MURPHY: It was almost all over there! Beautiful move from Kirk Cobain!
GOLDEN: I think that Wolfe was taking him too lightly. Won’t happen again!
Wolfe stays on one knee and slides over to grabs a single leg on Kirk Cobain. He stands and Kirk takes a swing at him, but Wolfe ducks underneath and kicks Kirk’s other leg out from under him! Cobain goes down to the mat! Wolfe tries to follow with an elbow drop, but Cobain rolls out of the way! Cobain tries to hit a (low-altitude) dropkick, but Wolfe shoves his feet out of the way. HUGE ROUNDHOUSE KICK connects to the jaw of Cobain, but Cobain remains standing!
GOLDEN: If I could say one thing on the kid’s behalf it’s that I didn’t think he would last this long against a killer like Damien Wolfe.
MURPHY: Doesn’t it feel nice to be constructive, even if it’s a little backhanded?
GOLDEN: Eh, it’s alright. Maybe not for me.
Wolfe gets a running start and lands a high knee to Cobain, who topples over the top rope and hard to the ground in front of the announcer’s booth! The impact sounded brutal, but Cobain manages to stand up without much effort.
MURPHY: Impressive show of guts from the rookie grappler!
The referee begins counting him out. Damien Wolfe is warned not to go outside the ring, but he ignores the referee completely. Wolfe jumps off of the apron, and Kirk Cobain punches Wolfe in the mouth! Wolfe reels a bit before backhand chopping Cobain and following with a SWINGING NECKBREAKER onto the outside!!! Cobain hits with a sickening smack! Wolfe smiles as the crowd boos him loudly. Wolfe rolls back into the ring… and Kirk Cobain is up!
GOLDEN: What?! He should be down and out after that!
MURPHY: He’s tough!
Cobain rolls into the ring and into the waiting clutches of Damien Wolfe. Wolfe hits a very quick snap suplex and follows with a pin!
1…
Kickout?!
Wolfe puts his hands on his knees, looks at his foe and cannot believe it!
GOLDEN: Is Cobain getting stronger here?!
MURPHY: Cobain slow to rise, but such tenacity!
Wolfe pulls Cobain up his stringy hair. Cobain grabs the wrists of Wolfe and delivers a dropkick to the chest that sends him to the mat! Wolfe pops back up and clothesline from Cobain! AND ANOTHER clothesline. Cobain takes time for some air guitar and ANOTHER CLOTHESLINE AND WOLFE STAYS DOWN!!!
MURPHY: Can you believe it folks! Kirk Cobain has Damien Wolfe down!
Kirk stomps his opponent a couple of times and starts to go to the top rope. At about the second turnbuckle Wolfe pops up, runs behind Cobain and….. AVALANCHE GERMAN SUPLEX!! Cobain lands head first! Damien Wolfe wastes no time and applies the SHARPSHOOTER!
GOLDEN: It’s all over now!
CROWD: PLEASE DON’T TAP! PLEASE DON’T TAP!
Cobain is struggling for the ropes or to escape… but just can’t do it and has to tap out.
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: Here is your winner…. DAMIEEEEEEN WOOOOOLLLFE
Wolfe takes to stomping Cobain a few times before walking up the ramp…
MURPHY: Uncalled for! Wait…!!!
BUT COBAIN IS UP AND IS RIGHT AFTER HIM WITH A STEEL CHAIR! Security makes it out in time to make sure nothing goes down. Wolfe stares down Cobain and walks through the curtain, while the normally reserved Cobain is ready to fight!
GOLDEN: It looks like security saved Kirk Cobain from another beat down.
MURPHY: Give credit where it is due, Dom!
GOLDEN: He can take a beating, but if he can’t dish it out, what good is that?
MURPHY: He stood toe-to-toe with one of the toughest men in Revival Pro Wrestling and wanted more after the match. That’s impressive in my book! Our next match should be a great one – Ian Jones and Malcolm Valenzuela!
GOLDEN: Ian Jones has to be furious thanks to his coming so close and failing to win the RPW Iron Man Championship. I’m afraid he’s going to take that frustration out on Valenzuela tonight!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: The following match is scheduled for one fall and has a 15 minute time limit. Introducing first…
Social Distortion – "Machine Gun Blues"
DUCKY: From Mexico City, Mexico and weighing in at 250 lbs.… MALCOM "THE ESCAPE ARTIST" VA-LEN-ZUEEEEEELLAAAAA!
Valenzuela is all energy, bounding back and forth between fans on both sides of the ramp slapping as many hands as he can. He has a lot of hair on top of his head, green eyes (thanks to contacts), and the camera catches a giant cross tattooed on his back. He wears black boots, knee pads, and orange trunks.
MURPHY: Here comes Malcolm Valenzuela! He looked quite impressive in victory along with John Brandenburg last week.
GOLDEN: Well I think The Brand may have done most of the heavy lifting, but Valenzuela looked alright too.
Malcolm slides under the bottom rope and into the ring. He leaps up to a second turnbuckle and soaks in the wave of cheers from the fans in attendance.
MURPHY: People love this guy wherever we go!
CROWD: BOOOOOOOOOOOO!
Ducky: And his opponent – from London, England… weighing 265 lbs….. IAAAAAAN JOOOOOONNNNNESSSSS
Ian Jones comes on in a leather jacket, black trunks, knee pads, and boots and couldn’t seem to care less about the hate pouring on to him from both sides of the entrance ramp. He calmly walks to the ring, rubbing his stubbly face with one hand. He gets up to the apron and points at his opponent, shouting some obscenities and steps into the ring.
!!! DING DING DING !!!
Malcolm rushes Jones, but Jones tosses his leather jacket at Valenzuela! He follows with a series of kicks to the gut before tackling Malcolm and pummeling him with sharp right hands! The referee manages to drag the jacket away, but Jones has hurt Malcolm!
GOLDEN: I wouldn’t want to have to be the guy facing Jones tonight!
MURPHY: He’s come out guns-a-blazin’! Malcolm is in trouble!
Jones scoops him up and slams him to the ground with authority. He follows up with a leg drop and then another leg drop! He walks over the ropes and shouts some stuff at the crowd, and the already-hot fans scream back at him! Jones kicks Valenzuela in the back up the head as he sits up, and he’s no slumped over. Jones gets a small running start and ROLLING NECK SNAP! The snap brings Malcolm back to the mat and hard!
MURPHY: A lot of people think of Jones as a street thug, but he has technical chops!
GOLDEN: Yeah, he’s close to the level of Damien Wolfe or The Brand in that department!
Jones takes a little too much time enjoying the effects of the last move and doesn’t see a LEG SWEEP coming that sends Jones’ legs flying up and his back to the mat! Malcolm slowly gets to his feet and hits a BIG chop across the chest of Jones! As he stands! He has Jones backed up into a corner and gets up on the second turnbuckle! He raises a fist and starts punching, the crowd chanting along!
1!
2!
3!
4!
5!
6…?
Jones lifts him out of the corner and DOWN ALMOST THROUGH THE MAT WITH A SPINEBUSTER SLAM!
Golden: It’s over!
The referee is down to count the pinfall!
1…
2…..
KICKOUT!
Jones stands up and drags Macolm uo along with him. A STIFF European uppercut turns Valenzuela around and facing another turnbuckle. Jones runs and knees him in the back! Valenzuela is slouched in the corner!
MURPHY: A vicious assault from the veteran from London, England. He looks on top of his game tonight! What is Malcolm Valenzuela supposed to do under duress of this kind of flurry of moves?
GOLDEN: Nothin’!
Jones walks to the opposite side of the ring at Harold Murphy!
JONES: Watch that gob of yours, mate, or I might have to come for you next! I saw what you said about me last week!
MURPHY: W-what did I say?
Jones turns around.
GOLDEN: All sorts of nasty things, Murph! You’re not one to lecture me on being constructive!
Jones charges again at Valenzuela but is met with a mule kick to the ribs!!! Jones clutches his side and falls to the mat! Valenzuela is up to the top rope! Jones rises! Valenzuela sails through the air and CONNECTS with a flying knee press! Both knees drive Jones head straight into the mat! Valenzuela goes for the cover!
1…
2…..
KICKOUT!
MURPHY: Close call!
Valenzuela is still hurt, but in control now! He lifts Jones and hits him with a series of chops! He tosses Jones into the ropes and MISSES a dropkick on the rebound, but is back up! Another dropkick, but JONES SIDESTEPS CATCHES HIM AND HOLDS HIM IN PUMPHANDLE POSITION! AND DOWN OVER HIS KNEE WITH A BACKBREAKER!
GOLDEN: WOW!
AND THEN LIFTS HIM UP, TURNING HIM AROUND INTO BELLY TO BACK POSITION WITH EASE AND GERMAN SUPLEX!!!!! Valenzuela is limp as a rag doll! Jones rolls through with the German suplex and locks in an INVERTED BOSTON CRAB!
GOLDEN: What a series of moves from Ian Jones! He has that locked in very tight!
MURPHY: We’re talking about The Escape Artist here, Dom!
The crowd starts chanting for Malcolm, and clapping builds as he looks for ways to escape and not give up! He looks like he’s in a lot of pain, and Jones really wrenches on the hold! Malcolm is looking for a rope!
Reaches…
Reaches….
!!!
Valenzuela manages to grab the head of Ian Jones and rolls him over into a pin!
1…
2…..
NO!!!!
MURPHY: Jones got an arm free and on the ropes at the last possible moment!
The two are up now and Malcolm kicks Jones in the stomach, but Jones comes back with a stiff forearm! Malcolm with a kick! Jones with a forearm! Malcolm runs against the ropes and tries to hit a clothesline, but Jones is able to boot him in the gut first! Double over, Malcolm is susceptible to Jones turning his back to Malcolm, locking his arms, and lifting him up!
MURPHY: Back to back and Malcolm is upside-down with nothing to protect his head!
VERTIBREAKER!!!!! Malcolm is out cold!
GOLDEN: THE PUNISHER! He told me about this!
The pin!
1…
2…..
3!!!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
GOLDEN: Jones with the big win over a highly-ranked Malcolm Valenzuela!
MURPHY: Impressive to say the least!
GOLDEN: Now you’re just kissing up so Jones won’t come after you!
Ian Jones looks down at Malcolm Valenzuela and scoffs. He looks in the camera and says some nasty things addressed to Hakai Dragon!
MURPHY: That’s uncalled for! The boys in the van have had to have their hand on the censor button tonight!
GOLDEN: They’re just as bad as SOPA, Murph! Down with censorship!
MURPHY: Well, what an exciting night so far. It has been an amazing undercard; but ladies and gentlemen, it’s time to fasten your seatbelts! Your first main event of the evening is coming up next!
GOLDEN: Brandenburg and Magenta Moon! The Brand versus The Face of Wrestling.
MURPHY: I have to say, The Signature Brand could be the difference in this match tonight…
GOLDEN: You mean the move that the commission seriously needs to consider banning? It’s a glorified choke hold Murph. How can that be legal?
MURPHY: The move was sanctioned by our esteemed commissioner; therefore, Mr. Brandenburg has every right to use it when the situation calls.
GOLDEN: Well, you say it will be the difference tonight? I think Magenta Moon might have something to say about that. She may be pint-sized, but she showed some guts last week. I still think Brandenburg is too big for her.
MURPHY: Let’s go to Ducky Smith for the introductions…
!!! DING DING DING !!!
Ducky: Ladies and Gentlemen, it is now time for the first of our main events of the evening! It is set for one fall with a 30 minute time limit. Introducing first…
The arena erupts with "YEAH" just as Magenta makes her entrance through the curtain. She holds up her signature mirror, smiles at the camera.
MOON: That’s right, The Face of Wrestling is in the main event again!
DUCKY: Weighing in at 156 pounds and hailing from Denver, CO, she is the self-proclaimed "Face of Wrestling"…. MAGENTAAAAA MOOOOOOOOONNN!!!!!
The fans don’t know how to respond to her, there is a mixture of boos and cheers as she stalks her way to ringside and steps through the middle ropes and takes her spot on the turnbuckle. Most of the cheers seem to be from women in attendance. She scowls at the audience as she pauses to check herself out again. She steps off the ropes and walks around the ring with a tough look on her face.
MURPHY: She certainly proud of what she brings to the ring, she was all business this week though after hearing her comments at the hospital.
GOLDEN: Yeah, you can’t even tell she got stitches from that attack from Sketchy Dan during the main event. Dan really nailed her!
MURPHY: Let’s not talk about that dirtbag anymore. The resiliency of Magenta Moon is about to be put to the test by this man…
DUCKY: And her opponent for tonight’s co-main event…..
Lights go out, a single spotlight hits the stage and the crowd is already going insane… Fog begins to roll across the stage
DUCKY: Weighing in at 200 pounds and hailing from Inglewood California…
Crowd is already chanting his name! You can barely hear Ducky finish his introduction.
DUCKY: He is John "THE BRANDDDDDDD" BRANDENBUUURRRGGGGGGG!!!!
Brandenburg makes his way to the stage, pauses and holds his fist in the air embracing the atmosphere of the arena. The guitar riff hits and he throws a punch in the air towards the ring and yells to his fans. With a look of determination, he makes his way to the ring.
MURPHY: Listen to these fans! They are firmly behind "The Brand" in this one. One would be remiss to bet against The Brand!
GOLDEN: The fans are important no doubt but it’s not who loves you that wins you the match, it’s what you do in that squared circle; and Magenta has the experience of last week’s Ironman Match in her favor. She didn’t have a partner to bail her out of trouble and tonight, The Brand is on his own
MURPHY: You make a good point, but the technical training of Mr. Brandenburg is second to none. He can make his opponents tap with a variety of moves the most impressive of course being the Signature Brand which can be locked on at any point in this match. Should that happen, there will be nothing Miss Moon can do but tap out just like everyone else. And I don’t think Mr. Brandenburg needs anyone to bail him out!
GOLDEN: Let’s just see what happens in the ring and let the wrestlers do the talking for us. I don’t have a pony in this race, Murph.
!!! DING DING DING !!!
Magenta Moon wastes no time in locking up with Brandenburg and attempts to power him into the corner only to get shoved unceremoniously to the ground. She’s quickly back on her feet and locks up with him again. As she tries to power him into the corner, she can’t seem to manage… but she isn’t going down again!
MURPHY: The power game is clearly not the key to victory for her in this match; but as we saw on last week’s Revival, she is deceptively strong!
Brandenburg breaks the lock and shoves Moon against a turnbuckle. Magenta bounces out of the corner quickly and locks up, yet again with The Brand.
GOLDEN: She is giving up 50 pounds to this man but she wants to prove she can stand toe to toe with the toughest in the company. I can respect that pride, but I don’t know how smart it is. The Brand isn’t a giant, but he is built.
Brandenburg pushes her into the corner one more time and this time, he tries to follow it up with a clothesline. Moon moves quickly and avoids the impact while Brandenburg slams into the corner. Moon lays a beautiful drop kick on the upper back of Brandenburg pushing him back into the corner. She follows it up by back flipping out of the corner and running, then jumping to the second rope and hitting an impressive knee to the head of The Brand.
GOLDEN: Now she’s thinking, Murph. Don’t let pride get in your way in the ring.
MURPHY: Because you’re not a prideful man, Dom?
GOLDEN: I’m not!
MURPHY: Brandenburg is reeling in the corner!
Moon is relentless in her assault and grabs Brandenburg by the shoulders with the intention of delivering her own version of a backstabber to him! As she drops back, he holds onto the top turnbuckle and she crashes to the mat! Brandenburg turns around and looks down at Moon while shaking his head.
MURPHY: Looks like Brandenburg is telling Moon he’s not going to have his own maneuver used against him. What a smart counter!
Brandenburg grabs Moon’s right left and falls onto it with an elbow drop. He proceeds to do it two more times while Moon is writhing in pain, still trying to catch her breath!!! Brandenburg switches his focus to her head, picks it up and locks her in a side headlock and pressed down against her back.
GOLDEN: He’s really slowing down the pace of this match now. - seems to favor his style better.
MURPHY: He is a mat technician, this is right up his alley, and he’s really changed the momentum of this match.
Moon slowly starts to fade from the pressure of the headlock and the ref checks in on her. Her body starts to go limp and the ref raises her arm but before it can even fall to her side, she slides down and out of the hold and kicks Brandenburg square in the top of his head knocking him backwards. Before he can realize what happened, Moon is scrambling up and she delivers another beautiful dropkick to Brandenburg’s chest. They are both laid out on the mat.
MURPHY: Where did she get that burst of energy? Did you see the kick to his head? He’s taken a lot of damage to that head last week and now she seems to be focusing on it.
GOLDEN: But Murph, it looks like it took as much out of her to deliver that dropkick as it did his receiving it! Oh wait, she’s stirring…
Moon climbs to her feet and fixes her hair. The crowd boos her, and she sneers and shouts back at them! She looks at her opponent, then steps over to him and tries to lift him up, she manages to get him to his knees before he sweeps her leg and knocks her to the mat. The Brand crawls over to her shaking his head, trying to regroup and applies another headlock. Moon quickly slings her head backwards and hits Brandenburg in his forehead, disorienting him and giving her time to escape.
GOLDEN: Looks like Miss Moon has that move scouted and was ready for It this time.
Brandenburg gets to his feet slowly and the two square off in the center of the ring. Moon ties up with The Brand again and he delivers a knee to her midsection, the sets her up for a suplex.
MURPHY: Looks like he wizened up to her power game bluffs and is taking it to her now!
Brandenburg hoists Moon in a vertical suplex and drops her onto her back, shaking the ring in the process! He gets to his feet a little quicker and looks out to the crowd which responds with a huge pop.
MURPHY: The crowd is firmly on The Brand’s side here! Let’s see if he continues targeting her back to follow up his suplex.
Brandenburg lifts Moon up by her head and whips her into the far side ropes. He snaps off a VICIOUS swinging neckbreaker and pops to his feet. He circles Moon and lifts her up again into a fireman’s carry, and then drops her to the mat and applies a rear chinlock.
MURPHY: This has to be putting incredible pressure on her already weakened back! What a transition move from The Brand. Move after move after move. It’s like a boxer who throws combinations – more often than not, he’s going to be more successful than the guy throwing single punches.
Brandenburg releases the chinlock and locks in an inverted facelock.
GOLDEN: What’s he going to do here?
Brandenburg quickly rotates 180 degrees and grabs Moon’s head!!!! He suddenly brings it crashing to the mat with another neckbreaker!!! He covers for the pin, and the referee is quick to follow!
1…
2…..
KICKOUT!
Moon throws her arm in the air knocking Brandenburg back as she rolls to her stomach.
GOLDEN: Whoa! Close one!
MURPHY: Brandenburg is dominating this match at this point. Moon looks over-matched and the submission specialist is looking to put her away!
Brandenburg walks over to Moon and drags her to her feet. She’s limp as he nails a BACKSTABBER and locks in THE BLACK KNIGHT BRAND!!!!
MURPHY: The Brand is wanting to teach her the art of submission! The Black Knight Brand is a devastating submission!
GOLDEN: After so much damage to her back and neck, I don’t see how she can avoid tapping!
Moon is fighting and clawing, trying to make her way to the ropes. She refuses to scream and she is definitely trying not to tap out. She’s inching her way towards the bottom rope! The ref checks in, and asks if she wants to call it off. Now she’s screaming but it’s at the ref. She told him to get out of her face as she somehow manages wiggle her way to the ropes and the ref breaks the hold.
GOLDEN: Well color me impressed, Murph! I ain’t never seen a lady so tough!
As Moon is trying to pull herself up in the corner, Brandenburg calls out to the fans, "IT’S TIME TO STAMP MY BRAND ON THE FACE OF WRESTLING!"
MURPHY: Looks like Brandenburg is ready to put this match away!
Moon is up in the corner and as she turns around, Brandenburg walks up to her and they lock up. Brandenburg whips her into the corner and as he comes running in, she skirts out of the way again and he hits hard into the turnbuckle, slamming his head into the ring post and bounces out. Moon then grabs him, scales the turnbuckles and uses his backwards momentum to deliver a perfect TORNADO DDT. Both competitors are down and the ref begins his count!!!
1….
2….
3….
4….
GOLDEN: Looks like Moon is the beginning to stir…
5….
6….
MURPHY: Brandenburg has not moved, the crowd is screaming for him to make it to his feet but he is still out!
7…. Moon is using the ropes to help herself up…
8…. She is trying to get her feet under her….
MURPHY: Moon is swaying, I don’t think she can do it Dom… This match looks to be over!
9…. Brandenburg is stirring
GOLDEN: MOON MAKES IT TO HER FEET! AND BRANDENBURG POPS UP AT THE LAST SECOND!! Somehow, Moon dug up the intestinal fortitude to answer the 10 count!
MURPHY: That tornado DDT did the trick, though, as Brandenburg barely made it up and now he is in la-la land!
GOLDEN: Oh, Murph, he may have suffered a concussion!
Moon tries to compose herself as The Brand stumbles against the ropes. High kick and Brandeburg staggers into her clutches. Moon drapes his arm around her neck like she’s about to go for a vertical suplex. She pauses and gives an exhausted smile to the crowd who let her know their support is behind The Brand! She tries to lift him into a suplex, but he blocks it with his leg! Frustrated, she tries again and NO DICE!
MURPHY: The Brand is still in it, folks!
In a huff, Moon shoves him back and hits a low kick! Shin kick! A series of forearms! Spinning heel kick!
MURPHY: WOW!
Moon rushes him before he can drop and lifts him into suplex position in the air!!!
GOLDEN: What a show of strength from the little lady!
AND DOWN WITH A BRAINBUSTER! ROCKY MOUNTAIN HIGH!
MURPHY: WHAT IMPACT! The Brand is barely cognizant! Moon pulls him to his knees!
Two forearms! Left head kick! Right spinning backfist!
MURPHY: EQUAL RIGHTS EQUALS FIGHTS!
She runs against the ropes and back with a Shining Wizard to finish the combination! Brandenburg falls back in the middle of the ring! Moon is quick to cover!
1…
2…..
3!!!!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: The winner of this match, MAAAGEEENNNTTAAAAA MOOOOOOONNNNNN!!!!!
MURPHY: Big win for Magenta Moon! Wow!
GOLDEN: I think you have to call that an upset, Murph!
MURPHY: This really shakes things up, ladies and gentlemen!
Magenta Moon takes her mirror and climbs a turnbuckle and looks at herself in the mirror. The crowd boos loudly, but it doesn’t seem to affect Moon. The Brand gets to his feet and looks dejected at the loss. Moon points at Dominic Golden and yells some threats at him.
GOLDEN: Hey now! Watch it, missy!
SKETCHY: Ho ho ho ho, *mock tone* WHAT A WIN.
The crowd books as Sketchy Dan shows up at the ring entrance!
SKETCHY: Some dumb skank wins a match, and Harold Murphy has a heart attack about it. How your head, lady? Remember when I busted your head open to match your busted-ass face?
Sketchy laughs and the crowd jeers wildly.
SKETCHY: Your time is coming, Moonie. And that douche John Brandenburg is no fight to be proud about… The Brand is… oh s*** !!!!!!
John Brandenburg is up now and is hot on the tracks of Sketchy Dan, who has booked it to the back. Magenta Moon smiles knowingly.
MOON: Wait until next week, Sketch! You’re getting yours!
MURPHY: Interesting turn of events! Sketchy Dan had better hope that The Brand doesn’t catch up with him!
GOLDEN: Dan can handle himself.
MURPHY: Well, we have just one match left for this evening! Let’s go backstage with the RPW Iron Man Champion – Hakai Dragon – who faces off against Landon Jackson tonight for the belt!
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
Camera opens to show the Dragon standing next to Brandy Swinson.
SWINSON: Mr. Dragon, Wednesday night is upon us and your title defense is coming up. During your press conference, one question not asked was how you are feeling. Between the backstage beat down and the epic match, you have to be hurting.
HAKAI: Miss Swinson, it’s Wednesday Night. It’s Revival time! Nothing else matters than what happens in a few minutes. The past is behind me and I’m not going to stand here and talk about how I feel. I will defend this title and I hope the moms and dads of the young dragons out in the audience are ready to cover their little eyes. A Tsunami is going to tear through this arena tonight and the devastation left behind will only be a fraction of what is to come. Mr. Jackson, I hope you’re ready. I’m done talking. I will see you in the ring.
Hakai walks away from Brandy and heads towards the ring.
SWINSON: Well, I guess we will get the answer in the ring tonight. Hakai certainly is focused on his title defense… Murph, back to you.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
MURPHY: It certainly does, Brandy! Thank you for that. Let’s go to ringside for announcements!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time tonight’s Championship match!
The crowd is still in a tizzy from the end of the previous match but they cheer loudly at the announcement of this match!
DUCKY: This match is set for one fall and a 60 minute time limit. It is for the Revival Pro Wrestling Iron Man Championship, introducing first….
Helicopter Showdown – "The Wrestler"
The crowd is on their feet booing loudly!
DUCKY: Weighing 276 lbs., from Cumberland, MD…. LANDON…. JAAAAACKSSSOOOOOON!!!
The beat drops and out sprints Jackson. He rushes the ring and slides into the center of the ring promptly flipping off the crowd as the boos reach a deafening chorus.
MURPHY: Landon Jackson is full of energy tonight and it seems as if he has as much disregard for the crowd as they do for him!
GOLDEN: Landon just is all about work. If they crowd hates him, that’s fine… he’s here to win a wrestling match.
DUCKY: And his opponent, hailing from Sendai Japan…. Weighing 221 pounds…. He is the reigning RPW Iron Man Champion!....
The lights go out and the crowd has changed the deafening boos into an exploding cacophony of cheers!
DUCKY: HAAAAAAKKKKAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIII DDDRRRRAAAAAAAAAAGGGOOONNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!
A blue spotlight hits the center of the stage and Hakai is standing with his back to the crowd displaying the traditional rising sun on the back of his white shinobi shozoko. He turns towards the ring and as the spotlight follows him, his ice blue eyes are focused on the ring and his opponent who doesn’t look impressed. The title is strapped to his waist as he makes his way up the ring steps and he takes it off as he steps through the ropes and holds it up with both hands for the fans to see.
MURPHY: This is first time stepping into the ring with the Iron Man title. The fans are showering praise on the champ and he is soaking it up.
GOLDEN: It could be the last time he steps through the ropes with that title on too. He had better not be taking his opponent lightly here. Let’s not forget Hakai Dragon is a broken man! His back and leg are shot!
MURPHY: Well Dom, even though he’s showing love to the fans, he has not taken his eyes off his opponent. He’s obviously not turning his back to him after what he went through last week.
GOLDEN: Well he’s smartening up, that’s good.
MURPHY: The referee takes the Iron Man title and lifts it overhead in the center of the ring and the crowd cheers! It looks like the referee is ready to get this match under way as he’s explained the rules to the competitors and held up the belt for all to see. Our main event is about to be under way!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
MURPHY: The two competitors are circling each other in the ring measuring the other up. After the start of both of their matches last week, it seems they are taking their time locking up this week. Definitely a show of mutual respect for the others abili….
Jackson runs across the ring and absolutely floors Hakai with a devastating clothesline.
GOLDEN: You were saying Murph. Jackson just hit him so hard it shook MY teeth!
Jackson walks over to Hakai and picks him up, slams him down with a body slam, quickly gets to his feet and start laying boots into Hakai’s upper torso and head.
GOLDEN: This is the intensity we were looking for from the challenger. Hakai does not look prepared for this aggressive and physical specimen.
Jackson drops consecutive elbows to the torso of Hakai then picks him up and whips him into the corner and delivers a vicious forearm to Hakai’s back.
MURPHY: Smart move on the challenger’s part, focusing on the chest and back of the Champion. We didn’t get much from the Dragon on his sustained injuries but you know he has to still be hurting…
GOLDEN: Especially with Landon laying the smackdown on him like this! Him not saying about his injuries is the pride before the fall, Murph!
Jackson hooks Hakai’s head from behind and drops him to the mat with a MASSIVE INVERTED DDT. He goes for the quick pin!
1….
2…..
KICKOUT!
MURPHY: The Champ still has plenty left as he kicked out with authority there.
Jackson wastes no time and he picks up Hakai and whips him across the ring, Hakai leap frogs the challenger on his way back across and as he lands, he goes down to a knee.
GODLEN: The damage to his back has been done. There’s no way we see a Tsunami tonight! What a smart move on Jackson to take away the Dragon’s finishing maneuver.
Jackson turns around and hits a drop kick right to small of Hakai’s back sending him to the mat face first. Jackson mounts the champion and degradingly slaps the back of his head.
MURPHY: The challenger is being very cocky here! Disgusting lack of sportsmanship on display here!
GOLDEN: It’s not cocky when you back it up Murph. Landon Jackson has the champ injured and down. He knows exactly what he’s doing!
Jackson gets up and drops another elbow on the lower back of The Dragon. You can see Hakai writhing in pain on the mat. Jackson circles to the champion’s legs and smiles as he looks down on his fallen foe. With ferocity, he locks in a Boston Crab!
GOLDEN: Jackson has the move cinched in deep. The Iron Dragon is in severe jeopardy of tapping out here!
MURPHY: The challenger here has really honed in on a strategy and it looks like there’s very little The Dragon can do to reverse his fortunes here. If this keeps up, we’re going to have a new champion tonight!
The Dragon tries to push up and he motions to the crowd for support. The concerned crowd, who had been effectively shut down start piping chants of "Iron Dragon". Hakai is pumping his fist while trying to maneuver out of the hold, finally he’s able to twist, roll over and knock Jackson off balance and to the mat. Jackson is quickly back up to his and approaches the prone Dragon. He grabs both of Hakai’s feet and Hakai pushes him off into the ropes and suddenly, the Dragon kips up and nails Jackson with a frankensteiner!
MURPHY: KIP-UP FRANKENSTEINER! WHAT HEART! Challenger and Champion are both down in the ring!
GOLDEN: How did The Dragon muster the energy to hit that mov?! You can see it hurt the Dragon but he really knocked Jackson for a loop. Jackson landed… oh wow, he landed right on his head!
The Dragon starts crawling to his feet, pounding the mat with his hand getting the crowd to clap in unison, until the entire arena is filled with a heartbeat of rhythmic claps. Jackson teeters to his feet on the other side of the ring and they make it to their feet at the same time. Jackson charges in to the Dragon who side steps him and whips him through the ropes to the floor. Jackson grabs the ropes and somehow manages to land on his feet on the outside. He reaches through the bottom rope and grabs Hakai’s feet and yanks him to the mat and drags him to the outside.
MURPHY: Looks like things are breaking down here. The challenger has to know he can only win this match in the ring.
GOLDEN: This is all about inflicting more punishment, Murph! He wants to put an exclamation mark on things tonight!
Jackson picks up the Dragon and whips him toward to ring post and Hakai smacks into the post solidly and goes down in a heap on the side of the ring. The ref has started his 10 count.
1…
2… Jackson picks up the Dragon again, with him draped in his arms, he slams his back into the ring post.
3…
4… Jackson picks Hakai up over his head and drops him face first on the side of the ring.
5.. Hakai lands in a heap at ringside.
6…. Jackson looks to pick up Hakai again but rolls into the ring to break the count.
MURPHY: COME ON REF! This is getting ridiculous.
Jackson is back out on the floor and picks up The Dragon and slides him into the ring.
GOLDEN: The Dragon’s back has to be absolutely wrecked here. Jackson came into this match with a game plan and he is executing it flawlessly.
Jackson slides in after Hakai and pulls him by his arms to the center of the ring. He picks him up and puts his head between his legs. He lifts the Dragon into "The Breakdown" position. He pauses long enough to mouth off to the fans "This is your IRONMAN Champion!!??" As he goes to drop him to the mat, Hakai wraps his legs around the neck of Jackson and flips him to the mat in a hurricanrana-style maneuver.
MURPHY: What a hell of a counter by The Dragon! It doesn’t look like he as anything to follow it up though.
Jackson is back up to his feet and looks completely enraged. Hakai is on his knees, facing away from Jackson. He looks behind him just as
Jackson starts to charge him. Hakai jumps to his feet, grabs Jackson in a ¾ facelock and executes a stunning backflip while holding onto
Jackson’s head and smashes his head into the mat!
MURPHY: THE SHIRANUI! Dragon just hit a devastating high impact move on the challenger who for the first time in this match is on the mat in pain! What a way to use his own momentum against him.
GOLDEN: The Dragon came out of nowhere with that move but he’s still down on the mat! He is not able to follow-up on any of these attacks. Simply countering a few moves isn’t going to get you a win against a tactician like Jackson! Landon needs to bide his time here!
Hakai crawls to the ropes and staggers his way up holding them for support. He grabs his back and winces in pain.
GOLDEN: The Iron Man Champion’s back has taken so much punishment. It is understandable if he just give in to the pain!
MURPHY: Hakai is not the kind of person who is just going to quit because he’s a little hurt, the man has been beat up in back alleys all his life! He’s been thrown around his father’s dojo! Hell, he watched helplessly as his whole family drowned in that horrific flood. The champion knows how to deal with adversity.
Hakai is back in the corner of the ring with his eyes keenly on his opponent as he slowly gets to his knees. Hakai teeters to his opponent and kicks him right in the gut, Jackson coils and then gets back to an upright base and looks fiercely at the Dragon. Hakai kicks him in the gut again and again, Jackson coils then bolts upright with a look of absolute murder in his eyes. Hakai tries to kick him again but this time Jackson catches his leg. Before Jackson can do anything, Hakai flips and delivers a skull crushing enzuigiri. Jackson falls like a sack of rocks to his knees and faceplants to the mat.
MURPHY: What a kick from the Champion! The tide of this match has turned but it still doesn’t seem like Hakai is able to follow up his attacks.
Hakai gets up slowly and makes his way over to Jackson. He is still holding his back as he delivers a kick to the head of the prone challenger. Hakai winces in pain and steps back over to the corner.
MURPHY: At this point, both Champion and Challenger are going to knock each other out. They are both going to need hospital stays after we’re done here. How in the world can we expect the Champion to defend this belt on every show….
GOLDEN: This is where we separate the men from the boys. They knew what they were getting into when they signed the dotted line to work here. I don’t expect you to understand that as someone who’s never stepped into the squared circle.
MURPHY: I’ve been around this business long enough to….
GOLDEN: Oh shut up and call the match.
MURPHY: These intense main events really bring out the worst in you, Dom.
Hakai stumbles back toward Jackson who is trying to get to his feet. As Hakai reaches down, Jackson bounces up, puts his leg over the neck of Hakai and drives him down to the mat.
GOLDEN: ZIG ZAG! The challenger is back in charge!
Hakai rolls to the ropes and Jackson gets to his feet and runs at the champion and delivers a sliding dropkick to knock Hakai out to the floor. He slides to the outside and delivers kick after vicious kick to the back of Hakai then me flips off the booing crowd and moves away to pull up the mat at the side of the ring.
MURPHY: Looks like Jackson has nothing but bad intentions out there.
GOLDEN: This belt means so much to him, he will do whatever it takes to keep the Dragon down. That’s all he’s talked about this week!
Jackson motions for The Breakdown again and puts the Dragon’s head between his legs. The ref’s count begins
1….
MURPHY: Not this! He’s going to break the Dragon in half!!!
2…..
Jackson goes to lift Hakai but he blocks it!
3….
Jackson slams his forearm into Hakai back and goes to lift him again but again, Hakai blocks it!
MURPHY: You can see the frustration in the face of Landon Jackson as he tries to put away The Dragon!
4….
GOLDEN: That’s not frustration my friend… It’s determination!
Landon smashes the Dragon in the back with three consecutive forearms and goes for "The Breakdown" again but the Dragon holds on to his legs and blocks the move again.
5….
Jackson shoves the Dragon down and goes to knee him in the head but the Dragon puts out his arms and blocks the knee shoving Jackson backwards and Hakai gets up to his feet.
6….
Hakai turns to slide in the ring but as he turns, Jackson hits him with a stunning superkick, knocking him sideways and to the exposed concrete.
7….
Jackson slides through the ropes breaking the ref’s count and slides back to the outside. He picks up Hakai and shoves him backwards into the ring apron then pins him to the apron and smashes him with his shoulder to Hakai’s midsection.
GOLDEN: There is nowhere for Hakai to go and his back is sustaining even more damage! Landon Jackson is stating his case to win the championship right here!
Jackson pulls Hakai away from the apron, tosses him back in the ring and pulls himself up to the side of the apron. He pulls down with both arms and SLINGSHOTS himself over the top rope and lands a solid elbow to the back of Hakai and without missing a beat he locks his legs around the outstretched arm of The Dragon and reaches up to wrap around his face…
GOLDEN: Looks like he’s about to hook in the LaBell Lock!!!
Hakai yells in pain as Jackson wrenches back on his head putting pressure on his neck and back. The ref is on top of the action asking if Hakai wants to give it up but he’s screaming NO!!!!! The crowd starts chanting his name again "IRON DRAGON, IRON DRAGON". Jackson screams to the fans to shut up and wrenches harder on the hold causing the Dragon to visibly fade.
MURPHY: The Dragon is in real trouble here but he’s really close to the bottom rope…
GOLDEN: The ref checked in on the Dragon and he’s not responsive.
Murph: The crowd is getting to a feverish pitch begging for the champion to come around and somehow get out of this hold
The ref lifts Hakai’s other arm and it drops to the ground without resistance.
1…..
He lifts it again…. Still no response……
2…….
GOLDEN: We’re about to crown a new Ironman Champion!!!!
The ref lifts Hakai’s dead weight arm one more time…..
……….
…………….
The crowd is on their feet screaming frenetically at the ref… Just as Hakai’s arm hits the mat, the ref sees his leg draped over the bottom rope!
MURPHY: Not just yet! Somehow, The Iron Dragon dug deep and got his leg over the bottom rope!
The ref calls for the hold to be broken but Jackson just wrenches back and Hakai hollers in pain… 1! 2! 3! Jackson lets the hold go! The referee admonishes him for not adhering to the call earlier! Jackson says some words make, and SOMEHOW HAKAI DRAGON IS ON HIS FEET! There is a fury in his cold, blue eye! Jackson comes at him and SPINNING HEEL KICK TO THE ABDOMEN! Jackson hunches over, and Hakai Dragon uses the ropes to keep from falling himself!
MURPHY: Holy cow! Where is this fortitude coming from?!
GOLDEN: Must be some sort of ancient Jap secret! Incredible!
MURPHY: DOM!
Jackson is up and another spinning heel kick! This one sends Jackson to his knees!
Nightwish – "The End of All Hope"
HAKAI: ???
MURPHY: WHAT THE?!?!
GOLDEN: HAHA YES!
El Omega 23’s theme music starts up and the lights dim! Hakai Dragon looks to the entrance, leaning on a turnbuckle for support!
MURPHY: What business does El Omega 23 or Diego San Martin have out here?!?!
GOLDEN: San Martin is the "Alpha Mind", Murph! He’s here for a reason!
The announcers look at the entrance. The fans look to the entrance. Hakai Dragon looks to the entrance… but one man does not!
LANDON JACKSON backs up into the opposite corner of Hakai Dragon! The Dragon is distracted as Jackson gets a running start and….
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HAKAI DRAGON MOVES AS JACKSON GOES FOR A SPEAR! HE GOES THROUGH THE ROPES AND SHOULDER FIRST INTO THE TURNBUCKLE!! Hakai Dragon stumbles a bit before lifting Landon Jackson into suplex position! Overhead AND DOWN WITH A PILEDRIVER!!!
MURPHY: TSUNAMI! TSUNAMI!
The ref counts!
1…
2…..
3!!!!
!!! DING DING DING !!!
DUCKY: YOUR WINNER! AND STIIIIILLLL RPW IRON MAN CHAMPION…. HAKAAAAAAAAAIII DRAAAAAAGOOOOOON!
Hakai Dragon is still on the mat as he is handed the RPW Iron Man belt!
MURPHY: What just happened?!
GOLDEN: I have no clue!
MURPHY: What are DSM and El Omega 23 up to?!
GOLDEN: Maybe it was just a malfunction in the van?
MURPHY: Well the lights dimmed and everything! Weird!
Hakai Dragon rolls outside the ring with his title and looks to the entrance ramp while his hands are on his knees. He then shakes his head, throws his belt over his shoulder and RUNS TO THE BACK!
MURPHY: It looks like Hakai Dragon is going to find out what happened himself! Well for Dominic Golden and the RPW crew, I’m Harold Murphy! We’ll see you next week in Atlanta, Georgia! THANKS, FOLKS!
The camera looks around wildly before focusing on a man – the same man from the end of the show last week. And he’s dressed the same in a large, blue trench coat that doesn’t show his physique. He is tall, though and has a steely demeanor.
And he’s holding a sign the same way he did last week. The message is the same.
"THE END IS NEAR."
The FanPosts are solely the subjective opinions of Cageside Seats readers and do not necessarily reflect the views of Cageside Seats editors or staff.
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Comments
Awesome.
Please make sure you post all these here. They’re too good, man, I want to make sure everyone gets to read them.
Forget it Donny, you're out of your element.
amazing.
Simply amazing. Great work man. Alot of work goes into this and it shows… Appreciated.
"I don't have an on-deck circle for ideas. It's just 'Batter up!!' Even though they're bad" - Mike Birbiglia
by Parkinglotninja on Jan 19, 2012 10:32 PM EST via iPhone app reply actions
Major props to Klemson Krash who helped me with the writing of this!
by Jon Knapik on Jan 19, 2012 11:22 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
thank you Klemson
"I don't have an on-deck circle for ideas. It's just 'Batter up!!' Even though they're bad" - Mike Birbiglia
by Parkinglotninja on Jan 19, 2012 11:57 PM EST up reply actions
Dude, It's your show! I just enjoy the fact you let me have a go...
Never wrote a match before, hopefully it doesn’t show too much. It was a blast and I find myself looking forward to the DSs and WNR!
What a blast!
In the body of other posts, I am often admittedly high and tend to not want to edit a lot.
by willlinn on Dec 2, 2011 12:01 PM PST
if Wren gets Arenado from Colorado, I’ll give him a BJ.
by Scott Coleman on Dec 19, 2011 9:45 PM PST
by Klemson Krash on Jan 20, 2012 1:03 PM EST up reply actions
I’m enjoying this too much. Great show Jon!
by 8bitDan on Jan 21, 2012 1:09 AM EST via mobile reply actions
great show
can’t wait to see how this thing progresses.
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