Rating Smackdown: R-Truth

He sings, he dances, he does it all! Be still my beating heart! This hardened (and I do mean hardened, just take a look at those abs!) ex-con has cleaned up his act and is the ultimate double-threat: a rapper AND a wrestler.

Pros: If you feel him, you'll stand up and say what's up. The man has undeniable charisma and is as stunningly limber as he is scrumptious. He's got multiple piercings, so if you're into mutilation I'm sure he'll be "K-Kwik" to oblige. He's been to prison, so he's no stranger to "doing hard time" in the "slammer" or being "sent to the hole".

Cons: The whole shucking and jiving minstrel show may be a bit beneath him, and it's certainly beneath you. This is 2009, sweetheart. It's time to take accountability. He's been to prison, so if you're into candles and satin sheets, you may want to look elsewhere.

Pat Patterson Memorial Ranking: 8.2